Action figures, Movies, Games, TV shows, things I like, Things I hate, weird news old or recent... they're fair game for my rants.
DISCLAIMER: OPINIONS POSTED ARE EXAGGERATED FOR COMEDIC EFFECT!! Got it?
Super Mario and its spin-offs have multiple villains, meanwhile main Mario games be like:
Oh noes! Bowser has taken Peach! Call Mario!
The first exception being Super Mario Bros. 2, aka Super Mario USA, the reskinned Doki Doli Panic. Super Mario Land has Daisy as the victim, kidnapped by the Alien Invader Tatanga. Super Mario Land 2: The Six Golden Coins, has Mario losing his castle to Wario. Tatanga returns as a level boss.
Wario Land: Super Mario Land 3: Has Wario hunting down a missing Peach Statue in order to get a reward. There he fights Captain Syrup and her Pirates.
So, Nintendo has a treasure trove of Non-Bowser villains and I wish they'd use them.
They literally have a Child Friendly Freddy Krueger and his latest appearance was a Cameo in Link's Awakening.
Tatanga screams MARIO KART!! Yet we get a stupid cow!
Seriously, Nintendo, what the fuck!?
But here's the thing: Mamu(Wart) could easily come back. In fact a game where MAMU and KOOPA team up to defeat Mario and friends is the "perfect story".
Something, something, Bowser finds a way to communicate with the Evil Mamu of Subcon. This mcguffin that allows the communication between worlds, allows Mamu to create obstacles from the dreamworld into the real world. So, Mario and pals need to juggle between the waking and sleeping worlds to beat Bowser, Wart, and their teams.
Sounds a bit Link Between Worlds...
Actually the inspiration was a different game.
At least for single player mode. On this 2D side scroller, You get up to a point where you can sleep in the waking world and enter subcon to clear obstacles in your way on the waking world and vice-versa.
In Multi-player mode, the teams can divide the tasks between raiding subcon and the waking world. But in order for everyone to reach the goal, both teams would have to swap worlds in order to succeed and both teams reach the waking world goal.
The Waking world would operate like a hybrid between SMW and NSMB. Subcon would be a NSMB/SMBUSA hybrid.
This idea is kinda canonical with the subspace mechanic from SMBUSA.
MAGA Men vs The Liberals: A series of Celebrities part of a Super team of Agents defending MAGA Across the globe. Basically crossing James Bond with Celebrities that support Donald Trump.
Dean Cain: codename: Super ICE
Using the Fat body with new long pant legs. Blue t-shirt, blue pants with reddish brown shoes.
Accessories:
Various hands
Handgun
ICE Badge
Kevin Sorbo: codename: Heracles
Wearing a yellow button up shirt, brown pants and boots.
Accessories
Various hands
Police Baton
Billy Ray Cyrus: codename: Achy Breaky Kid
Sporting the suit body without a tie in brown blazer and pants and black shirt. His pants have new lower legs with cowboy boots.
Accessories:
Cowboy hat
Soft goods duster
Dual Revolvers
Various hands
Rob Schneider: codename: copymaker
Wearing the standard T-shirt body in Grey with blue jeans.
Accessories:
Various hands
Shotgun
Kristi Swanson: codename: Slaaay
the Only female on the team so far
Using the female body with white Referee shoes:
Purple crop top, green tights.
Accessories:
Various hands
Pair of knives
Steven Seagal: codename: Tovarich
Sent by Putin as a Russian-American liaison:
Using the Fat body with new long sleeved arms:
Accessories:
Alternate clean shaven head
Various Hands:
Extra hands because Seagal is the Aikido Master.
But the MAGA Men need enemies:
The Liberals: A group of Secret Agents who promote Liberal values across the globe.
Miley Cyrus: codename: Dual worlds
Female body: with Amber boots red shirt with black sleeves, blue jeans and brown boots
Accessories:
Alternate head with Blonde Hannah styled hair.
Hands
Dual revolvers
LeBron James: codename GOAT
Wearing the suit body and blazer in purple with a yellow shirt and purple tie.
Accessories:
Cartoon ball bombs in orange
Various Hands
Matt Damon: codename: MATT DAMON!
T-shirt body in Grey with black blazer, black pants and shoes
Alternate Trump disguise in cartoony orange facepaint and bad wig.
Trump hands.
George Clooney: codename: Fledermaus
Wearing a blue suit with a Grey shirt and yellow tie.
Accessories:
Multiple hands:
Boomerangs
Oprah: codename: Oprah:
Using a modified fat body to have Oprah in a pantsuit.
Accessories:
Various hands
Handgun
Alternate Whoopi Goldberg head.
Now for rhe leader of the Liberals:
Bill Clinton:
It HAD to be Bill Clinton. He's the Mastermind behind everything. He's had people commit suicide throughout the ages. Also he's on Epstein's list. He's the Ultimate Anti-MAGA villain.
Brand new shirtless torso and wearing only a speedo. New bare feet.
Accessories:
Alternate Smoking Cigar head
Various hands
Blue dress from female announcer.
As you can see, this is a parodic take on celeb culture wars. Oprah, I'd need two of. One to have a Whoopi to use on my TMNT display, and Oprah for the 9000+ penises joke.
Of course I'd be getting Seagal. Dean Cain may be a skip... damn, that's a low blow picking Rob Schneider over Dean Cain.
The warring Cyruses I'd get for reasons...
Bron I can skip. But I NEED Alec Baldwin and MATT DAMON!! for obvious reasons. Yes, it's a Team America Reference. Clooney, I only want him so Mr. Cade can beat him up for Batman and Robin.
But the pièce de résistance is none other than Bill Clinton. Of course , I would have to get an extra announcer body to display a normal version of him, but if his body is a speedo underneath, I can have President Horndog! But let's be honest. I'm so keeping Bill Clinton in the blue dress. It's just so hilariously evil.
This list is not meant to be taken seriously... even though I'd probably buy most of this line... yes, I'd start with the Cyruses... those who visit the fanfic corner know why.
I recently ranted about Donald Trump the Action figure. I want to expand on this:
I would Like for FTC to expand on this line, but not necessarily with talking figures. I'd like to see those 6.5"-7.0" figures. I specify thsi scale because FTC has MEGO styled dolls of various presidents and other politicians. I mean from George Washington all the way to Joe Biden and even Senator Bernie Sanders.
That's important because it means that not just Presidents are getting made.
Presidents I'd like to see:
Ronald Reagan, George HW Bush, Bill Clinton, George W Bush, Barack Obama, and Joe Biden. I didn't mention Trump because he already has a figure. So hakuna your tatas, MAGA crew.
Other Political figures I'd like to see:
Rafael Eduardo Cruz, Alexandria Ocasio Cortez, Hillary Clinton, Bernie Sanders, Sarah Palin, Mike Pence, Bob Dole, Ross Perot, Mitt Romney, Kamala Harris, Dick Cheney, and Vermin Supreme.
You know you want him... As an action figure, not as President.
Even though it would be a Mind-blowing choice,Neither Kennedy nor Lincoln will be on this list.
Personally, I'm sticking to 1980s up to now, because Picking 1700s and 1800s candidates would require new sculpts also, I'm avoiding JFK, LBJ, Nixon, Ford, and Carter. JFK for obvious reasons. LBJ would be cool of we had a 7 inch Naked Snake. Jimmy Carter would disapprove getting an action figure... Ford, he was there during a shitty time and is forgettable...
I mean it would be yet another Vietnam war movie. Or will this movie be before he enters the war... so many questions, but I think I'll read the Wikipedia entry when it comes out.
But at least it's not an adapted to modern times Rambo with an Iraqi Freedom era neoRambo. But that's the thing... Rambo is a product of its time. We already saw what we could see from him. A prequel would be a double edged sword.
The prequel could flesh out Rambo, but it could also change things to a point that could damage the storyline. Just as Rambo living changed the character from the book into a tool of American jingoism. But, the problem is that we'd have current year writers working on an icon from a dofferent era with different cultural sensitivities.
It's a long road and the chance of fuck ups are lots.
Used a stock Pic, because I Forgot to take the MOC Pic. Too desperate to take him out.
Sagat has entered the arena... and innthe words of Donald Trump he's YUUUUUUUUUUUUGE!!
So, the Fibal Boss of SF1 and second to Final Boss in SFII is once again out the Toy Chest. I believe this is the fourth Sagat figure here at the House of Rants.
Unlike most reviews All pics will be at the end. Also, a Sneak peek at a 2026 review.
Articulation:
Like other Sagats, this one can pull various in game poses. Some would require stands obviously. Despite his weight, he can stand in one foot.
5.0
Paint and sculpt:
My Sagat has a slight splotch on his neck. I'll have to get some rubbing alcohol to try and remove it. Since it's hard plastic I don't wanna risk using acetone. His sculping is really good! While not as awesome as Storm Collectibles, this Sagat is ⅓ of the cost, but the sculpting is 95% as good as Storm's. Best part? No rubbery torsos.
5.0
Accessories:
Extra head
Extra dramatic hands
Tiger fireball
Stand
It would be awesome if we could get more heads and hands, but I know costs limitations... even Storm is doing less stuff with their Arena lines. So, what we got is "good enough". Most of the SFII stuff can be done and even some Alpha stuff
5.0
Overall:
Sagat gets a perfect 5.0 because I only do a point and half point system. I wasn't going to dock half a point for a small splotch. Now without further ado, the pics!
Sagat: You are my Challenger? This is a street fighter, not a Hot Dog eating contest Nefty: Ha Ha Ha. At least I can See why kids love Cinammon Toast Crunch.
I'm a regular shopper at Figures Toy Company getting accessories. Sometimes I regret not getting some accessories that get discontinued. I was looking for some accessories the other night and I noticed this:
It's the FTC entrance stage that has different screens... well, I noticed a few things:
The artwork shows various FTC items from both old Jakks styled figures.
Top left has the retired male suit body (caucasian) with the black haired head ver. B. The wrestler is the male body in blue with the same head I used for fake Hun.
Top Center has the same guys from top left plus the AA version of the bald headed dude. (Discontinued?)
Center Left has the Crew Referee, the standard wrestler bodies with bald head and Brown hair ver.A
Center center has Male series 2 head in black (discontinued?) And the Old Female announcer.
Lower Left has Brown Hair C on the standard body.
Now let's tackle the Right Side, which I left for last.
Bottom right has two wrestlers, but they seem to have the same black hair type B and the head I used for Fake Hun.
Top right has the same head from the old female announcer on a Wrestler body with the diva paint job...
But all of these are filler crap before heading to the interesting... the Audience.
There you'll see some familiar faces: earlier versions of Karen, Ethan, Mikey, Lance, Jason, and, Stu. But the heavyset AA woman is here too... Will FTC make her? I hope so.
April O'Neill has a cameo... and I want the dude covering her face with a sign. I also want the Blue haired girl, the screaming bald black dude and the green top girl next to him. Last but not least Army Santa and the Not Tom Selleck carrying Mikey.
So here's the crazy idea: bring the Art of the old female announcer head to the style of Wrestling fans line. Based on how the art style translated to 3D, it would be a HUGE improvement over the Jakks styled head. Eventually, they should move the wrestlers body to the 6.5 inch scale
I have sine other thoughts stewing, but those are for another day.
Yes, they have talking figures: They are a smudge more expensive than their regular fogures though. Talking feature. They also lose torso articulation.
The first one is a MEXICAN MASKED WRESTLER ANNOUNCER!
The first FTC Luchador Announcer with quotes in both English and Spanish. That's cool right?
This Announcer is $27. But what if I told you there's an even bigger TACO?
Not that kind of Taco, but the TACO...
You know, Jeffrey's besto friendo... OMB, The Tariff Man himself, Donald Trump!
Has 9 Trump quotes, bunch of hands, alternate head, and a podium: Figure is $45... good thing it's first term proces because Tariffs would probably put him at $47... that's a joke, MAGAfans... because his price is $44.99 and he's the 45th and 47th President of the US. So don't get mad.
I just wish they sold the podium separately. Maybe one without the Presidential seal. You low to use for award shows... like HoF Inductions.
But let's be honest here... that's not the proper body. This is why we need a suit version of the fat body. A More accurate Trump would require a costumization of the Gamerverse Wilson Fisk.
I think that if I ever get TACO, it'll be the most controversial It Came from the Toy Chest ever. More controversial than reviewing Jesus Christ himself.
So, the easier solution is don't buy Trump...
But I kinda hope they make Clinton with an extra soft goods blue dress, Dubya woth storybook, Obama in a tan suit, and Sleepy Joe with Ice Cream cone. You can't just throw Donald Trump and not expect backlash. That's why throwing in Obama, Biden, or even Dubya and Clinton can soften the blow... but I'd like a Bill to go with Donnie, so I can have the Super Duper Epstein pals!
When was the last time I bought a figure to hate on? First time was the DCUC Starfire... Bootleg Goku? I got the Avatar: The Last Airbender figures to hate on a Masterverse Evil Lyn I never bought. Well, there's MOTUC 30th... in any case, If I'm ever getting TACO, the review will be mocking the man more than criticizing the figure.
I lost count. I need to remind myself that the list is about Items, not necessarily SETS. Although, I can do sets. Part 2 is right here so you can get a refresher.
60: cafe/low end restaurant tables and chairs:
WWE and AEW have a monopoly on long tables. But those don't work if you wanna have a let's say neighborhood Pizzeria display, just to name a type of display. It could be a cozy cafe.
59: Beach Episode gear:
I'm thinking Beachballs, cooler, umbrella, towels, a small boombox. Maybe even lifepreservers. Cooler could come with ice and soda cans. Ooh! Maybe even Watermelons for those Anime displays.
Boombox size suggestion. And Puerto Ricans born before 1995 Understand the reference.
Maybe adding bottles of sunblock. If we wanna go fancy some piña colada in a pineapple with straw and umbrella, or a coconut with a straw for fresh coconut water.
58: Cigars and whiskey:
Yes, these would be perfect for a Cigar lounge theme, or a Crimeboss theme. Of course the cigars should.come.in various sizes:
Normal figure size
Lobo/Ben Grimm/Kinpin sized
Whiskey glasses
Whiskey bottles
Cigar boxes
Cigar cutter
If we are heading the old Providence route. We could add
Broken Whiskey bottle
Lighter
Molotov Whiskey
These could come in a humidor shaped box.
57: Blood packs saline and other Medical stuff:
Pardon my ignorance by calling fluids amd equipment "stuff".
Action figure bandage wrap
We already have Teflon tape as the de facto action figure gauze wrap. But I'm looking for accessories for makwshift triage, ie Doc and Lifeline trading other joes, Leonardo transfusing blood to a female foot Ninja.
Asuka on a hospital bed and then Shinji makes yogurt...
That too, Cade, that too. Maybe a defibrillator.
56: Archery accessories:
There are many Archers in current toylines
So, how about a series of bullseyes bows, arrows, even some special Arrows like the infamous Robin Hood Shot. The Bullseye would most likely require photo mounting putty and a templare for one to make their own bullseye covers.
55: phones 2.0 and other electromic gadgets:
This time I'm looking at older Cellphones...
Flip phones
Nokia style phones
Blackberry style phones
MP3 players (iPad and Zune styled)
Pagers.
54: Rats and pigeons:
City Displays could use some of these. Sure they could pack some garbage and crap that can work with them.
53: water effects:
Car splashing, puddles with and without ripples, maybe a fire hydrant that can get a water effect plugged in or a fire hose, even tiny splashes. Heck the blood wffects could be used in translucent light blue for cartoony water or in clear for realistic water.
52:Electric effects:
I'm not simply talking lightning effects like Electro or Storm. I'm thinking things like a wall outlet (use photo mounting putty to put on wall) with electric sparks shooting out. Arcing electricity, sparking breaker. Plug in effects for live wires... Body Massage! Reference. Plus the usual effects that can be wrapped on figures to simulate being electrocuted. Mostly electricity from man made stuff.
51: Flame and Fire!!:
Many action figure displays NEED Fire. For example, Ghost Rider NEEDS flaming trails. And various kinds of flames would be useful for displays. Small flames, big flames.
50: impact effects:
Many years ago Bandai did the Dragon Ball style impact effects like ground pounds. But those impacts were rather large. I'm thinking action figure fist sized with the biggest being ML Juggernaut sized. Obviously adding the impact for other surfaces can work as well. From Comic book styled Pow! Bam! Biff! To the standard smack 💥styled effects. The existing blood effects can rol as well. The effects could be put in a "cartoon violence" pack and add random toon violence items frying pans, anvil, Dynamite bundles, round bombs they could come in a boulder shaped box.
49: smoke effects:
A lifetime ago, Bandai made some effects but those have been discontinued. Would be cool to get new kinds of smoke.
Smoke Grenade type, Ninja smoke bomb, aftermath smoke. Then color variants could help folks revisit.
48: kid ride:
A lifetime ago, supermarkets, convenience stores and some pharmacies had these machines that kids would ride for a quarter or two.
What, you thought I would ask this to use on ACTUAL CHILD FIGURES!? No need for it to be battery operated.
47: Turkey:
I know I mentioned the bird for the Mr. Bean gag, but I'd better let
Turkey with pillows mounds of mashed potatoes, buttered ranch dressing, tiny onions swimming In a sea of cream sauce...
And that's why I'm fat... but Uncle Phil has a point. That sounds tasty... NO! I KNOW IT'S TASTY! I have eaten it. On special occasions only. Bit yeah, the Uncle Phil special and add some southern Thanksgiving food items and call it a day.
46: Grills and barbecue accessories:
I mentioned gas cylinders in a past rant. One use for the smaller cylinders is Propane powered Grills. I recall seeing some Grills way back when, but charcoal Grills with charcoal, gas Grills and this can tie to the Puniaher implements of pain I referenced earlier.
45: Umbrellas:
Not the beach kind, but normal umbrellas. Large, medium, small. Japanese styled, Western styled, new reverse closing kind, straight handle, J handle, even the new c and o handle styles.
44: Gym equipment:
I know Mattel has made some things like dumbells, barbells, Benches, but those things are long gone. Regret not getting the Training Center back when I worked at KMart. But I'm looking not only at weight benches, but Pull bars with cord as a "cable substitute". (Mainly for a Punisher display with Frank wrapping the cable on a criminal's neck, while the weights are at maximum. You can have other uses for it... also treadmills, yoga balls, aerobic steppers, etc. These could be used on a youth center for Teenagers with attitude customs, since Hasbro is no longer doing Lightning Collection.
43: Pyromaniac Pack:
I know I've mentioned lighters, Flame effects and Molotovs, but hear me out. Flame thrower with adjustable straps that works on 1:12 to 1:10 figures. With Flame effects that plug to it. Explosions of the smaller kind could be added here. Jerry cans, splashed gasoline, etc. Totally matches Punjsher style displays.
42: Martial Arts Breakables:
Bloodsport, Karate Kid, the SF Games, even Mortal Kombat. I'm talking boards, cinder blocks, bricks, ice blocks, Flaming bricks, etc.
41: Gasoline Pumps:
This is more for Background Props and it can be used in combination with the Pyromaniac Pack.
Totally not thinking of making a Zoolander reference in a review. But it would also make great use as a prop for a Punisher Diorama.
ML Punisher (classic comic look) filling up the Ramen Toys Van while FTC Wrestling Fans Hunter and Brett are mugging gas station attendant FTC Wrestling Fan Tasha. The getaway vehicle? Mattel WWE wrekkin' slammobile The Rock Blue edition.
Yes, Punisher seems to be a source of Inspiration, but it's due to his unorthodox and imaginative methods of staying grounded when dealing punishment in a world with gods and superhuman beings. Also slashers...
Steam is currently banning porn games, at behest of credit card companies.
Nefty, I'm going to stop you right here. I'm the GameDude and a massive pervert, so I'll be doing the ranting here.
Are you sure, Nick?
I'm sure. Hello, I'm Nicholas Raymond Cade, part time Superhero/Incubus/Space Prince/Adventurer/Gamer/Professional Pervert. I'm an advocate for porn games. I'm not saying anything goes. There are some fetshes/paraphilias that shouldn't be playable. BUT that should be UP TO THE VENDOR... in this case, Steam to determine what they allow or don't. It never should be up to the credit card companies.
Stop, stop, stop. I can't let you do this rant, otherwise people will think I'm hiding behind a fictional character to speak I'm not Kobbo.
Yes, I like porn games. Some of my favorite games involve tentacle rape. The reason I like this subgebre is because it's obviously fictional.
If the game is more vanilla, I go for more stylized/non-realistic visuals... or I go for Fantasy/Sci-fi stories. To keep everything well defined as fiction. But I strongly oppose to Credit Card companies determining what can I buy on the internet, when their anti-porn stance is hypocritical.
But allowing this opens up a slippery slope. Are credit card companies going to stop people from buying Stephen King's It? Or GRRM's A Game of Thrones? Alex Haley's Roots? ALAN Lichtman's The Case for Impeachment? Because it has unsavory content or content that goes against certain interests... They could also block the purchase of contraceptives or guns, if they felt like it.
At the end of the day, The Vendor should be the one deciding what can be sold on their storefront. Not Credit card companies, not Internet Slacktivists, hell not even the customer.
But, this "think of the children" crap is, well, a load of crap.I mention it, because that's the excuse Neo-puritan censors love to use on thwir crusades. Parents are the ones who should be curating what their children read, watch or play. There are ratings systems on movies, TV shows, and videogames for that reason. The moment Credit card companies or activist groups like the cunts from Collective Shout, try to force what ADULT CUSTOMERS CONSUME.. To me, that's a load of bullshit. Stop giving so much power to these HOA. Karens. Why are they going after fictional characters and not against real life porn?
This is almost as retarded as the UK demanding people's IDs to play Grand Theft Auto online
Blanka... The Jungle Beastman. This is the second Blanka and he's a big boy.
Born Jimmy, ended up in the Jubgle after a plane crash. He turned green and feral. He hangs out with Dan and Sakura.
Articulation:
Blanka is surprisingly well articulated. Most of his game poses can be recreated. Unfortunately, a mainnpose cannot be properly recreated, though. It gest to a "close enough" then again it would need a second ab crunch.
4.5
Paint and sculpt:
Blanka looks a lot like his SF2 Counterpart. The sculpting has a few nifty tricks to deal with the articulation. Blanka has a boot cut hidden by his shackles and shin hair tufts. The hair is segmented and the softer plastic prevents the articulation from being hindered.
5.0
Accessories:
2 electric effects
2 hands
Extra head
While it isn't much, what we got does most of the basic stuff.
I'm Pleasantly surprised with the electric effects.
5.0
Overall:
Blanka gets a 4.83 as his final score. It's a great score. Other than not fully rolling into a ball, this figure rocks! Wave 4 seems to have the most fun figure so far. Wonder what Sagat and Vega will bring.
Blanka: Gau? Nefty: wait, is that a Final Fantasy 6 reference? Blanka: This is why I hate crossovers. Nefty: Crossover Deez Nutz!
Blanka: Gawr! Nefty: Ow! She's now Sameko! Blanka: You like V-Tubers? Pikamee is the best! Nefty: She's now Henya... Blanka: What about Ironmouse? Nefty: She's still Ironmouse?
Blanka: roar! Nefty: shocking... said no one ever. Hi I'm Nefty and welcome to Jackass!
Blanka: Rawr! Nefty: Holy shit, I blocked! I think I'm getting the hang of this. But which moveset do I have?
Blanka: I won! Perfect! Nefty: Just Round One... there is still Round 2
I'm still super stoked about the Wrestling fans line. A bit more so than the Crew... But the possibilities are rather large here for not only civilians, but customs. Because let's face it... I've repainted most of my UWF by Figures Toy Company. So far, Karen is the only one spared.
So, I have ideas and I'll divide them in new heads/accessories on old bodies vs stuff needing brand new bodies. Today I'm tackling:
New bodies and shit:
Yes, it's time to make a long winded rant with bunch of shit that will make some people uncomfortable due to their sick and dirty minds.
Let's start with the Children:
Warning:
Some of the suggested parts involve swimsuits of various styles that dirty minds may twist it into something disgusting. There are no dark motivations behind these, other than build a somewhat modular system for figures. The reason for this Warning is for this post not to get flagged down like a TMNT list rant that I put the "ADULT" in adult collectible.
Now that the Warning is in place, I'll begin.
The standard Child Torso is a unisex T-shirt and shorts wearing Torso.
Bare arms can make a "muscle shirt" look/wide tanktop look. Combine it with the painted skater sleeves and we have faux long sleeves for kids.(unisex)
Bare legs that can double up as tights.(unisex)
Tights styled crotchpiece. (Unisex)
Bare lower legs that end up in bare feet(unisex)
Sandals (unisex)
Ballet shoes (unisex)
"Bare" torso (boys) doubles as tight fitting tops for Ballet/school play displays.
The reasons why I had the warning are the following:
Some pieces will also double as underwear and that can make some folks uncomfortable. But it needs to be done if I want to do sundresses as an overlay and for ballet tutus. I also want to have swimsuits for beach/water park displays.
For examples:
Let's make a new girl character:
Using the Leotard Torso with the "bra" part painted white and the crotchpiece painted white with the abdomen in white would give her an "underoos" type of underwear, or a one piece swimsuit. Over that she could have a light blue sundress and black ballet shoes to create am Alice in Wonderland inspired outfit. Then we pop a pigtailed happy ginger head and we have a new character. Let's call her Maria.
Now let's do a boy:
Taking the old school Shirt body, the Nerd Vest from the previous rant in black, using the new slack legs in light blue and the old body Sneakers in black, all we need is a new head thinking Brunet hair, clean cut short hair and Glasses with a worried expression. We have a new kid, Pedro.
Beach versions:
Using the Unitard torso for the girl with bare arms and legs.
Using the bare torso and the old school shorts with the new barefoot lower legs and we're done. The thing is that you can mix and match to your heart's content
Using this Background Image with "prototypes" of the fans, on the far right, their right, your bottom left, there's a teen in a light blue top, black tights, and a beige jackwt tied to her waist. Seems like a hybrid between Amber and Kaylee. Well, aside the wrapped around jacket, we could make a kid version of her:
New head or Reuse Kaylee's:
Shirt Torso with bare arms in light blue
Tights crotch and bare legs in black, blue socks and white sneakers.
The kids next to her only things he needs are a hoodie torso overlay and a new head. If we get new jacket sleeves, even better.
All I want is a body part database that can be mixed and matched to create new characters.
A part of me wants obese kids as well:
But those would be a bit more complicated... due to requiring 100% new sculpts and they couldn't get much reuse from them.
They would be scaled down versions of the Obese men sculpt and for the girls throwing in a dress overlay.
Speaking of Obese folks:
I find the lack of Melanin overloaded folks with Obesity quite disturbing. Not gonna lie, I'd kill for two Dark skinned Obese folks: One being a policeman, the other having a Reginald Veljohnson inspired head. One headswap later and
While keeping the Obese around, back to the FTC Audience backdrop. Next to proto-Tasha with pink hair, we have an obese dark skinned woman. I want an obese female body. Would require a new upper torso and new upper legs. The new "bare upper legs" are for leggins/tights to accommodate dresses.
Now let's work out other new parts:
Slacks and closed shoes.
Button up shirt with tie or no tie options.
Long sleeve Blazer arms.
Blazer
Special buttoned up upper torso (both male and female) with plug to attach a badge (Police, Paramedic, Firefighter, etc.)
Again, the vest overlay could be used here for the guys and the dress for the women. (Think GTA Auntie Poulet)
Head ideas:
I mentioned the Reg Veljohnson inspired head already
A white dude with a passing resemblance to James Avery (pillowy mounds of mashed potatoes expression)
A fat version of Jeffrey Jones with his hairstyle from Beetlejuice, but with black hair.
Black woman with dreadlocks face is like a combination of Raven Simone and Whoopi Goldberg.
Black man reminiscent of a fat Vincent D'Onofrio in Full Metal Jacket.
A cross between Miss Cleo and Rasputia (yes, as in Norbit)
White woman with Blonde Elvira Hairdo.
Inbred fully bald White dude with methhead teeth
Inbred red haired white woman with methhead teeth. Trashy looking Page cut.
Big Smoke looking brother. No hat.
Brunette with Eleanor from the Chippettes hairdo.
Hairstyle similar to Granny from Looney Tunes.
Shoulder length Perm for a black woman
Longish crazy hair with methhead teeth. (White man)
Bowl cut
Now Mandatory Beach bodies:
I mentioned bare upper legs for dresses. Now I'll add bare upper arms, bare feet, and bare male torso. Also I'll add a female v-Neck upper torso that doubles as swimsuit top. No need for new crotchpiece unlike the kids.
We have options:
Males:
Standard fat body with bare feet.
Standard male body but using the bare arms to make the T-shirt and tanktop
Standard Body with the shirtless torso and arms
Shirtless torso with the bare legs for the Speedo Look (thinking the Jeff Jones looking head would be for the Caucasian version of this body)
For the Females:
Standard Body with the bare legs. To simulate a shirt over the swimsuit.
V-neck torso with bare arms and legs for the One-piece Swimsuit.
V-Neck Upper torso with bare abdomen and bare legs for the bikini option
Now let's hit the Slim ladies...
Poor choice of words there, Nefty...
Shut up, Cade!
As I was saying:
The slim ladies:
I NEED to get rid of the Bra upper torso!!
Here are two already mentioned ideas for torso, but I need to keep insisting In order to make waves. Now the slim females wouldn't require that many parts... 2 alternate upper torso, and bare feet. I'm not sure if the Female Referee is Reusing male parts. (Would need to have one in hand and, I don't.) So, let's save this for the event of a part Gamma.
Now let's discuss the new torsos:
The Uniboob torso is for some One-piece Swimsuits, some turtleneck outfits, and to use with the proposed blazers from the previous rant.
The Barbie Torso is for more risqué outfits with plunging neckline, some sportsbras and bikinis. And it has no visible bra straps for open back dresses. Remember that I'm looking at these beyond Wrestling fans. I'm looking at these as civilians to fill backgrounds. Charity events where certain high profile people could show up. Cringe Warning
BvS reference ahead. Movie gets worse every time I see it. Or just the same dress designs used on the og female fan figures (Amber, Jade, Lisa, and Tasha) but without the pesky bra sculpt.
Again, using the overlays I proposed on the previous rant and alternating with these new bodies, more variety could be obtained.
So, the Mandatory Beach variants:
The bra torso workshop for a bikini top with the crotchpiece being the bikini bottom.
The uniboob torso makes a onepiece swimsuit/leotard. Think Cammy/Psylocke.
Also some square neck and asymmetrical bikini
The Barbie Torso can make two kinds of swimsuit. Think UMK3 Kitana/Mileena/Jade. For the first swimsuit. The second type would be bikini tops with plunging neck, and more risqué suits but we aren't doing the latter.
I would also like to introduce the girl Shorts, which would be a new crotch with the upper thighs painted in pants color while the lower thighs are flesh colored. Some girls prefer shorts to the beach even if they're wearing a one piece suit.
I hope you have noticed the trend that i'm going for. Building a catalog of parts for multiple outfit options and pre-investing in future lines.
I should tackle some special heads:
Brittany from the Chippettes as a brunette with an excited expression (I'd be lying if I'd say that I'm not thinking of a custom Irma in case S7 fails us)
Jeannette from the Chippettes in blonde with an amused expression. (I'm totally thinking of Japanese Irma from TMNT Gaiden. The one that runs in her underwear with a katana)
Blonde Caucasian with a braided ponytail. Not like Lara Croft.
Pixie cut with unnatural colors (both races)
The Gary Oldman 5th Element hairdo (both races)
"Elvira hairdo" in red.
Inbred methhead teeth lady with dual braids.
Back length Perm (both races)
Straight hair version of Jade's odango hairdo.
Ponytail with bangs
Slim Men, time to get it done!
We have plenty of parts already. I want to introduce the beach parts and 2 different sets of bodies:
Average: slim body not flabby, but not athletic either. No muscular definition
Athletic: slight muscular definition, but not Wrestler ripped.
These bodies require bare arms, bare legs, new bikini/tights crotch and shorts upper legs.
Heads:
Short dreadlocks (black man)
Simon Phoenix styled hairdo (black man) NOT BLOND!!
Afro (black man)
Mohawk (with and without glasses, both races)
Blond white man with a hairdo similar to Jason Narvy in the 90s
Ginger man with a ponytail
MacGyver hairdo
Shoulder length hairdo (Trunks/Team Rocket James)
Clean cut short hair and Glasses
Longish hairstyles receding hairline.
Blond Tom Selleck in Magnum hairstyle.
Urkel inspired hairdo with and without Glasses.
Let's create some useful bodies for the parts:
Office workers: (adults)
We got the female blazers, the uniboob tops, and the non plaid skirt pulling the heavy lifting for the slim ladies. A big blazer with pantsuit would pull the heavy lifting on the heavyset ladies. For the men, the slacks and the Button shirt with ties do the heavy lifting for both slim and big men. But not all office workers need ties or long sleeved shirts to work.
Personally as long as we get a caucasian big man with a short sleeve button shirt with tie and slacks either light blue shirt and dark blue pants or white shirt and dark blue pants, I'm OK... (yes, I would use the black haired Jeff Jones looking head to make a Burne Thompson custom) and the Slim Caucasian body with a short sleeved shirt (no tie) and slacks. Preferably Sporting a white or red shirt with blue or black pants. I'd use the Jason Narvy styled head to make another custom (Vernon).
I'd also take a heavyset Melanin abundant office lady.
I mentioned that we need soft goods dresses/skirts for the ladies. But here I'll go fora couple of secretaries:
Using the Barbie Torso and painting it as the top of a low cut strapless black dress and using the nonpleated skirt and the Lisa shoes for a caucasian woman. Same in lavender for the lady with excess Melanin. Pop in the braided ponytail head on the Caucasian and the Pixie cut for our sexy ebony secretary.
For the more nerdy secretaries we'll need heads with glasses. One should be the Jeannette from the Chippettes inspired head. For the body let's start with the Uniboob body pleated skirt. One with Lisa shoes, the other with the Referee shoes. Both would also have the nerdy vest
Figure 1: green top short sleeves, purple skirt and light blue vest. Lisa shoes:
Figure 2: Light blue top forearm length sleeves
Yellow vest and skirt white tights Referee shoes.
Now for the third kind of Secretary:
Female Referee torso, crotch and normal legs for a pantsuit with Amber feet. We pair her up with the blazer. For the head the Redhead Elvira inspired head will do for the Saltine American. Now for the Chocolate Secretary, the Perm head.
Other random ideas:
I recently ate brownies... not my brownies... they were... brownies. So my THC tolerance is nearly non existent. So, I was so high... I mean opening lyrics to the only good Nickelback song high.
I started freaking out. My brother was like: "Nigga, calm your cracker ass down! It's just edibles! Oh yeah, you don't do weed. Pussy!"
Not doing the exact kids club, but characters that kinda resemble them.
For example:
A slim adult with a backwards hat and Brad-styled glasses. Not blond, cap is not red.
A fat adult black man that resembles Jaws.
A Blond version of I/Q which would be the base for an 87 toon Baxter. This is just a way to transition into the next stage:
People with Disabilities:
Current year and all that. I know FTC has a wheelchair in their accessories section, but we need a child sized wheelchair.
But I'm also looking at people with Prosthetic limbs.
Do I have an Ulterior Motive to ask for these?
Yes! Looking for an overweight Caucasian body with a below the knee Prosthetic right leg. That would facilitate the Pizzaface making process.
But this can also bring me to a few Special Sets:
Halloween sets: starring the OG Fans:
6 sets:
Set 1:
Karen, Hunter, Amber, Stu:
Karen dressed as a Princess:
Pink dress with white and light blue accents, no skin exposed in order to make it swappable with other kids. Unique accessory a Princess tiara
Hunter dressed as a secret Agent:
Basically Hunter in a tuxedo.
Gun would be his Unique accessory.
Amber dressed as a slutty witch:
Using the "Barbie Torso" with a skintight painted dress with a vneck that almost reaches her crotch with a tiny soft goods skirt that barely covers her underwear. Unique accessory flying broom.
Stu dressed as a Sumo Wrestler:
A barely dressed Stu with a soft goods Sumo mawashi.
Set 2:
Ben, Brad, Tasha, Gary:
Ben dressed like Robin Hood:
Unique accessory: Bow
Brad dressed as an 80s Wrestler:
Take Ultimate Warrior, Macho Man, and Hogan... unique accessory, feather boas.
Tasha dressed as a bug exterminator:
Using the "Barbie" body painted as Pink overalls with white boots and white belt. Unique accessory: fumigation sprayer.
Gary as a Superhero:
Gary wearing old school superhero tights with dark blue tights and light blue gloves, trunks, and painted on Dark blue domino mask.
Unique accessory soft goods cape.
Set 3:
Kaylee, Joe, Lisa, Clayton:
Kaylee as a Ninja:
Using the swimsuit body as a base and painted like a Ninja outfit and a soft goods veil.
Unique accessories: 2 Kunai.
Joe as a Soldier:
He gets a new BDU overlay using the long sleeved body and new boots. For Unique accessory a machine gun
Lisa as a Nun:
Lisa in the normal body painted as a white bikini with the Lisa shoes and a soft goods Nun headdress and dress. Unique accessory: n/a
Clayton as a Private Eye:
Clayton wearing slacks and shoes with a soft goods Trenchcoat.
Unique accessory: binoculars
Set 4:
Mikey, Jade, Kevin, Jason:
Mikey as a Ninja:
Body painted similarly to Kaylee in a Ninja outfit and a soft goods ninja mask:
Unique Accessory: 2 kunai.
Jade as a Belly Dancer:
Using the "Barbie Torso" and sandal feet with the body painted as a belly dancer add a soft goods veil to cover her mouth.
Unique accessory: n/a
Kevin as a Hunter:
Kevin wearing a short sleeved button shirt an open vest (like the planeteers) slacks and boots from soldier Joe)
Special accessory hunting rifle.
Set 5:
Eugene, Marvin, Shawn, Lance:
Eugene as a Martial Artist:
Using the bare body with Speedo crotch, soft goods karate gi.
Unique accessory: 2 breakable cinderblocks
Marvin as an alien:
Yes, this is a reference. First we have Marvin with his face painted green. His body would be painted in red tights with gray accents.
Unique accessory: 60s Ray gun
Shawn as Little John:
Basically Shawn dressed in an adult sized outfit similar to Ben. Unique accessory: Bow.
Lance as a Mime:
Sporting mime facepaint and a mime outfit.
No unique accessories because he's a mime:
Set 6:
Ethan, Lloyd, and 2 new characters:
I know it's "kinda cheating" but releasing a 2 character set would be wrong.
Ethan as the grim reaper:
Using the bare body in black and skull facepaint. With a soft goods grim reaper tunic
Unique accessory: adult sized scythe.
Lloyd as a Mad Scientist:
Lloyd wearing slacks and shoes with a soft goods Lab coat.
Unique accessory: n/a
Now for the new characters. I won't give them names. First let's start with a young girl of color, since we lack those. Let's give her pigtails.
She's dressed as a Princess, but her outfit is mostly light blue with pink and white accents.
Her accessory is a royal Scepter.
Now the last character would be an adult female, blonde. She'd be dressed as a cat burglar. Using the uniboob body and Amber boots completely in black with a single silver line going from her neck to the waist joint, being the catsuit zipper.
Looks like Tom Holland didn't quit Spider-Man... as some nasty rumors stated.
Dammit! The only time I can agree with Joe Quesada and I was robbed! Having Tom and Zendaya trade their love to revive Marissa Tomei by making a deal with Borat would have been ridiculous and awesome at the same time.
Also, newer Spider-Man suit
Walmart actually shipped my New Etheria She-Ra. The one item available everywhere gets shipped, but the Walmart Exclusive gets canceled.
You know what's bullshit? Having a successful pre-order then getting an item canceled just to see Scalpers doing this shit.
Parlando di cose stupide. Guess who's got some new weird ads stalking Leon Scott Kennedy?
Si haz dicho el búho verde, haz adivinado.
Yes, Duolingo has a thing with Resident Evil or something.
What the actual fuck? Can't wait to see the goddess put this in Resident Evil 2 Remake.
If Duolingo helps Leon practices Spanish.Then Resident Evil 4 will be a cakewalk for him.
Tattoo: The Tattooed Sumo Wrestler. He's rather simple: a bigger than Slash figure that could be as big as 2003 Hun. Smaller than GG, but fat, because Sumo wrestler.
Heads would be a vintage head, a neutral head
Standard hands, C-grips, dramatic, and since he's a Sumo wrestler, Sumo slap hands.
There is one problem: his Tattoos. We can't use markers, because not everyone knows how to draw and somebody will inevitably draw dicks.
Stickers, like the vintage figure are a no go. For Obvious reasons.
The only option would be Vinyl Decals, but to say that I don't trust S7 with these would be an understatement. They could also give us pre-made tattoos Like NECA did with the Wyrm and Tattoo pack
These Vintage Tattoos are crap. I would prefer a Japanese styled Tattoo on his back. On his Torso, on other areas that joints won't damage the tats. Perhaps Japanize some of the vintage Tattoos.
-The lion could be turned into a Japanese Lion-dog.
-The face with Lightning could be turned into Raijin.
-The Spider could be a spider with its body being an Oni's face.
Adding a cloth Kesho Mawashi (pre-fighting loincloth) and Yukata (yes, the reason for me adding the yukata is to mimic another Fictional Sumo Wrestler...) a throwing salt hand would be a nice plus. Then there's his weapon. There isn't much to do with him. Maybe add his dog from the Archie Comics and the Toon hamster?
Movie came out on July 11th as of Augist 3rd, it collected $551 Million dollars.
In less than a month, it collected 82% of what Man of Steel collected in a few days over 3 months. (Jun 14- Sep 19) it would need to do on average 2K per day for 60 days to beat MoS.
Keep in mind that we're in a post-COVID world with less theaters, movies being rushed to streaming and digital, coming from the fiasco that was the DCEU, and last but not least Superhero fatigue. A bunch of handicaps that Man of Steel didn't have.
But let's look ar another Superhero reboot trying to recover from a past fiasco. No COVID, no streaming, no superhero fatigue. In fact it comes right after the Spider-Man 2 hype. The movie made 377 Million... on it's forst release.... other relreleases added 3 million to the mix. Seriously, we're talking about the most marketable Superhero of them all. The Goddamn Batman. Specifically Batman Begins.
A movie that would be considered a flop in these days, especially for being Batman. Superman has done in less than a month 1.47 times what Batman Begins made in its first run of 4½ months.
Remember that the sequels made over a Billion EACH. So, they paid off Batman Begins's failure. Now, if Gunn can keep the hype and the following movies are at least just as good as Superman, then The DCU is in great hands.
Nintendo has officially put Mario in the Friendzone.
That reminds me so much of
But there have been instances where the "friendship" seems more like something else. I'm not saying they're FWB, but there must be some sort of benefits if Mario is doing all that shit. No fat dude is gonna do all the shit Mario goes through... but it's not all doom for the fat plumber/doctor/hero...
I was gonna mention that, Daisy...
Stop it! Daisy was the Princess Mario saves i. SUPER MARIO LAND 1. Fans usually paired her with Luigi, due to Peach being Mario's girl friend.
But there's Pauline, the OG... but of Mario is into longest, Rosalina.
So, will Nintendo let Mario cool his noodle or will he be stuck in the Friendzone?
Why is it so wrong for Peach and Mario to be a couple?
Like we all know Mikey (and by extent the other 3) help April because they're horny teens and they hope their favorite JILF becomes a JIF.
