Dec 31, 2013

New Year's Resolutions that are 99% ignored

Finally, 2013 is almost Over!! The year of the rant-a-day-keeps-the-Doctor-away kept Matt Smith away in the end... Now we even got a New Doctor... but, I'm not going to do a look back on 2013 today. New Year is coming and it's Resolution time...
We claim to do a list of things to do Next Year as a new beginning... Most of the list is Bull...

-Lose weight: This seems to be very popular especially around the Holidays and all that food...
No matter how your subconscious goes Ahnuld on you

You're ignoring the heck out of it... Exercise is hard work, and most of the "healthy alternatives" end up either being incredibly bland flavored, or make you crave unhealthy stuff...

OK, let's take a look at Subway... the "Healthier choice" in fast food... The cheeses and dressings (Mayo, bbq sauce, etc.) make the sandwich a lot less healthy... The add the Cookie to the mix and the only thing losing weight is your wallet.

-Quit X: Some smokers say, they're quitting smoking, alcoholics say the same about the drink... Others have their own personal demons to quit... but it's not easy.

Especially if they're trying to do it cold Turkey... again, this is closely related to the first item on my list.

-Get rid of old junk: Ah this one is popular especially with a collector who has a significant other that considers the Collection as competition... That is taking up space in the garage, basement, attic, etc.
So one does the "getting rid of old junk" resolution... There is one slight catch. The moment that the "purging" begins The collector suffers a transformation... Just because you wanted to get rid of those old comics that he doesn't read that were signed by some guy named "Stanley"...

Even trying to part with the items online can be risky...

-Redecorate: Either to appease the significant other or for oneself, this one is often mentioned but it can turn to be far more expensive and requiring too much labor to do... It's a lot easier than sticking to a diet and exercise regime, but there is always an excuse: Doctor Who Marathon, Company Picnic, oh it's X's Birthday! I sprained my ankle...
Sinful Animal
Alas, the Sinful Animal strikes again, as a matter of fact, This Animal is the reason why MOST New Year's Resolutions fail...
Because we put up with Unrealistic Goals for Resolutions and the moment we don't see immediate results we give in to the Sinful Animal that somehow hasn't gone extinct by doing nothing.

Just go for realistic goals... If you wanna go with the traditional BS resolutions, add the word TRY... That way you still did it even if you fail...
Great! I'm teaching y'all to cheat at New Year's Resolutions... Nah! Just messing with ya... One thing I can promise is: I won't rant every day, but I shall rant as much as possible! (maybe more than one rant a day in some cases) Happy New Year's

Dec 30, 2013

13 MORE Characters I want to see in the New TMNT Line.

That are NOT Rocksteady and Bebop, because I so want those two!! I'm going to Exclude Tokka as well, since I fear they'll give Slash a second mutation and make him into Tokka.

We have gotten characters like Leatherhead, Rat King, Mutagen Man, Metalhead in the new toon. Some have made it into toys... So let's revisit some past characters that I'd be interested to get as toys.
Again, I'm excluding Rocksteady and Bebop because those are MUST HAVES...
I know that I made a list on March of Characters I'd like to see in the Cartoon...
This list will be of characters that are NOT those mentioned before...
We got on the toon the Mutagen Man and Slash... Hopefully the toys will come up soon. Heck, Pizza Face is coming... Even if he looks a lot like Spaceballs' Pizza the Hut


#13:
Tatsu...
A remnant from the 90s movies who never had a toy (AFAIK). A character similar to him was made in the 2003 series, with Master Khan. Also, he could be used as an extra set of eyes to watch over Karai.

#12:
Fugitoid
This will lead to Triceratons, which I'd love to see as well. Also, I can't get enough of the little guy... Wish I had gotten a 2003 toyline Fugitorid when I had the chance...

#11:
Triceraton Warrior
I heard rumors that they'll be appearing on the new series... It's a good thing because the aliens known as Kraang are becoming the thing known as a bore, to the one who calls himself Nefty...

#10:
Roadkill Rodneys
If there is one thing I loved to dread out of the Konami Aracde games were the roadkill Rodneys... They roll around and zap you with their blasters. One wrong move and they Tazed your shell! I suppose 3-4 in one pack would be enough...

#9:
Ace Duck!
I remember him from my childhood (never owned... My good buddy Leo had him) and it's a Pilot Duck!! How awesome is that...

#8:
Bishop
I'm borrowing him from the 2003 series since he is basically The Man... With all these mutants and aliens running around New York, somebody from the Government is likely to check things out...

#7:
Dragon Lord
Hold it! Before you strike with your pitchforks and Torches, Hear me out...
I already suggested Venus, so Dragon Lord isn't that farfetched idea... It's better than Genera Aguila and the others from that CG Movie...

#6:
Tora
The Boss from the Snow level of the NES version of the Arcade game. He never had a toy... (I know Shogun is cooler, but Tora is easier to reinterpret into the new toon and toyline)

#5:
Zach
I know April is pretty much the new Zach, but instead of taking the 87 movie approach, perhaps something similar to Keno from Secret of the Ooze would be the perfect approach for Zach... It would also lend itself to have him as a pseudo rival for April for the Role of 5th Turtle. Unlike the Pulverizer, Zach should be competent.


#4:
Human Hun
I mentioned that I'd love to see Turtle Hun as one of the suggested "Dark Turtles" in my previous list rant. But I happen to like Human Hun (Especially now that Bradford is not in that role due to his mutations)
#3:
Armaggon
Evil. Mutant. Shark. If Fishface's second mutation turns him into Armaggon, AWESOME!

#2:
Aska
She is a popular Tournament Fighters Character... Also, This line needs more females.

#1:
87' Krang's Android Body
Since Nick's TMNT already ruined the chance of Kraang Prime being the 87 Krang by making KP into a Giant... I hope that we can get a Kraang Android body more similar to the 87 Krang's... Cause NOSTALGIA...



Dec 29, 2013

No Kellan, no!!! Run!! run for your life!!

Apparently Sparkules, the wannabe He-Man is hooking up with  a very special Person...
It's hypnotic...

Yes, boys and girls... The Twerkey has struck back!!! Funny thing is that Mr. Lutz is friends with a certain Hunger Games actor who happens to be the brother of an Asgardian deity.

Seriously, it's creepy going out with a friend from your ex...

Now Mr. Lutz, You've been campaigning for years your desire of being the Most Powerful Man in the Universe. Do you think it's a wise career move to enter the Controversial world of Miley Cyrus? Especially after she broke up with your buddy Liam Hemsworth? or he broke up with her?

Again, these two are grown adults and can do as they please, but Isn't there some sort of dating etiquette that says: "Don't date a friend's ex until X amount of time has passed?"

But back to Kellan Lutz and his desire to be He-Man... This move could backfire, since this whole Miley Drama could hurt the ticket sales to his Hercules movie, which would make him not worthy enough to do this...


and I wouldn't rely much on Expendables 3...


I mean look at what happened to Liam Hemsworth in Expendables 2:


So, he's got all his chips on Hercules, if he wants the people at Sony Pictures to look at him and say: "Hey, that Lutz kid could pull off He-Man. He also was on the Twilight movies, so she can bring girls to the theaters. It's a Win-win!" If the Hercules movie sucks ass (which sadly all signs point to) then bye bye He-Dream...

Dec 28, 2013

Holy 80s Inspired Insanity!!

I saw an Amazing Kickstarter a couple of hours ago... It's a movie... That will blow your socks off!

KUNG FURY!! It's Radical! It's an 80s cheesy action movie love letter, but without a bunch of old guys who were popular back then... Seriously,  it's about a Martial Artist Rogue Cop in 80s Miami fighting crime and just watch the trailer so you can see what it's all about.

These guys are about to complete their goal. I really hope they do because this looks like the 80s on steroids.
UPDATE:  They reached their goal!

Speaking of 80s tributes, what's the most popular 80s platformer character... I'll give you a hint...
Well, there's another group of people on Kickstarter who need help for a platformer game.

Default Dan is the name of the game... It's kinda like Super Mario Brothers but with a twist.

Unlike the Kung Fury campaign, this one NEEDS a LOT of help. I don't know if it'll make it or not, that is up to the people who donate and the goal is reached.

Do I need to add a Kickstarter tag?

Dec 27, 2013

Pinkie Pie is getting Some Weird Competition

By Weird I mean Weird Al Yankovic Style!! Yes, Fillies and Gentlecolts, Weird Al, (Transformers animated he was Wreck Gar) is coming to Ponyville as a Rival to Pinkie Pie...
But Weird Al in MLP, NEEDS a Weird Al song in MLP!!




Apparently, this episode has a song if a Mysterious tweet by one of the show's writers is to be believed.

Seriously, Weird Al being some sort of Rival for Pinkie Pie is all sorts of awesome!!

Also, Pinkie Pie may be related to a certain Redneck... The pic I linked was semi-inspired by somebody I know!!

Seriously, this season has TWO Pinkie episodes... There's a Rainbow Dash Episode and Finally, a Worst Pony Episode...


I hope that Cheese Sandwich is popular enough to get a toy... WEIRD AL Pony toy...

Dec 26, 2013

Time of the Matt Smith is up!

Now the Doctor is Capaldi...
I mean it wasn't that long ago when Tennant went all "I don't want to go" It almost feels like he went Yesterday... but now it's the Raggedy Man who has left the TARDIS...

So, let's begin with a semi-Review of The Time of the Doctor (aka the 2013 Christmas Special)
Let me get out of the way: The episode is a sort of Love Letter to 11's fans. Silence, the Cracks in time etc. get referenced in the episode a lot.
Also, I'll let River Song do the Warning


So the episode starts with the Doctor following a message that every race in the universe seems to hear. Those races with space travel capabilities board their ships (Daleks, Cybermen, Sontarans,etc.)
Meanwhile Clara is trying to impress her family for Christmas Dinner with her made up boyfriend (the Doctor)

So, the message is apparently from Gallifrey. This message is being broadcast through the crack... on Trenzalore...
So, the Church of the Silence is trying to stop the Doctor from reaching Trenzalore because the Message from the Crack comes with a Truth Field (where no lies can be said) and the question is:
DOCTOR WHO?
If Gallifrey reaches the Doctor and the Time Lords escape through the crack, The Time War begins anew (due to the huge Dalek Army surrounding the Planet)
So the Doctor fends off Sontarans, Cybermen, Daleks and even Weeping Angels as he grows old and we discover he is #13
Cause the Warrior (John Hurt) and Handy (The pseudo Regeneration by 10 when he lost his hand) apparently now count.
He stood at Trenzalore, defending a town named Christmas from these attacks (Including from a Wooden Cyberman)
The Daleks took over most of the Church and turning the people into Daleks... Cause you can't never have enough Daleks.
The Doctor is STILL Fighting and is super Old... He's so old that he almost looks like a Hybrid of 11 and 1.

Clara (who has been jumping in and out of the timeline thanks to the Doctor sending her to Earth and she returning stubbornly) pleads with the Time Lords to help the Doctor. So, they give him a freebie.

The New Regeneration destroys the Dalek ship and stops the Daleks. It wasn;t a Regeneration what stopped the Daleks. It was a Pre-Regeneration so we could have a Matt Smith minus Old-Man prosthetic makeup giving a sappy speech (with a Cameo by Amy Pond) before he became CAPALDI!!
The End...

Now, my thoughts on the episode are:
-They could have made a 4-parter episode with the story they had, but they compressed a lot of it with the "passage of time" in order to fit the 85 Minute format.
-This one will sound funny if we read what I said above, but it felt like the episode was dragged too long and was a tad repetitive.
-Capaldi needed more screentime... I know that new Regenerations get little time on screen in order to make you watch the next episode, but I felt that the pre-regeneration to Younger Matt before the actual regeneration was a bit too much.
-I'm starting to dislike "The Impossible girl" (Here's hoping that 12 ditches her for a new companion)

Dec 25, 2013

It Came from the Toy Chest... Dark Somber Edition...

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays from the House of Rants!
Here's a VERY Special It Came From the Toy Chest! Enjoy!

Dec 24, 2013

Not only The Rock was Rockblocking MOTU...

But Gropey the Monkey Abandoner was another of the reasons why Mr. Chu left MOTU...
Because he was busy filming a sequel to a crappy Movie...


Yes, We're getting a Justin Bieber Sequel to the "Documentary Masterpiece" that was Never Say Never...
Seriously, Santa!? WTF!? WORST.Christmas.Present.EVER!!
You should have allowed Krampus to visit Justin Bieber... He needs a lot of visits from Krampus!


Since Bieber ruined My Christmas, here he is to ruin yours!


All jokes aside, Merry Christmas! I'm going to bed early because... Santa is coming

Dec 23, 2013

The Importance of Plundor

After a nice cup of tea with scones... Something I haven't had in ages, except when I had British Roomies... So I can drink tea like an Englishman... so any lonely alien madmen traveling inside a police box who need a sidekick, I'm available!
While it's more fun to be a Doctor Who Fangirl, we have two problems:
1: This is a MOTU Rant
2: I don't think I can pull off the "girl" part of Fangirl...

So, Plundor! He is one of the Controversial 2 of 2013. He appears on Episode 19 of the Filmation Masters of the Universe series. He's an Independent villain (non-affiliated to Skeletor, Hordak or any other evil faction leader.) from another dimension. He looks like a Pink Bunny... That is the MAIN cause of discord among the fandom.

OK, so what's the deal with this guy. We KNOW he looks like a pink bunny. I already mentioned in a previous rant that he loots planets for money... Spoiling planets for cash... Plundor: the Spoiler... get it?

The reasoning behind his appearance (and high pitched voice with a slight lisp) is very simple:
Why is the guy in this picture so despised. I mean he dresses like he was from Miami Vice, has a fast car like Magnum P.I.
He has an attractive woman next to his fast car while the sun sets on a 1980s Miami-like city... Hip clothes, cool car, attractive female companion? I'm so smoking a pack of Cam... wait a minute! The Cool Looking Cartoon Camel Almost made me smoke!!
So, we can say that Joe Camel is some sort of "wolf in sheep's clothing" in order to get more money for greedy corporations.

 Plundor is basically a Corporate Mascot who ruins and spoils everything in his path in order to get Money.

Where have we seen that before?

I'm not saying any names... But seriously, WHY would Mattel choose to make a character that is mocking corporate mascots and capitalism to make as a character!?  Did they miss the point of Plundor?

Eh, I think they expect us NOT to notice the point on Plundor... The Seemingly Harmless Pink Bunny who'd do anything for cash... and he WOULD do that...

In any case that is pretty much Plundor. He is not the worst possible choice to have as a character in MOTU Classics (There are far worse choices... *cough*Nepthu*cough*)
At least Plundor has enough Material to talk about... Had this been about Standor, well, that would be a Short Rant:
"Stan Lee's Ass, Meet Mattel's Lips!" The End! or ~FIN if I wanted to be more Artsy...

Dec 22, 2013

Mo' Ponies, Mo' Problems!!

Yeah! We're getting MORE Popular characters from MLP Friendship is Magic in the Blind Bag Scale...
We have something called Rainbow Power...
Whatever That is... It's going to give us, freaky Rainbow-tized Ponies... No!! Don't Tell me that Dashie Kicks the Bucket or something... but LOOK AT THIS 3 PACK!! It Has Snips and Snails!!

The Idiots who always seem to end up as a Minor Villain's Sidekicks are coming in the Blind Bag Mini Scale...
I have to say that it's Pretty Awesome that we're getting them somehow...
(Their chances are pretty slim in the Playful Pony scale)



Oh but that's not all! The second set that is coming has True Fluttershy Rainbowtized!!
Codnabbit! I haven't even found the Normal colors set with Wahaha! and Steven Magnet!

There's some pegasus colt that, I'll be honest, I don't give a flying feather about... The other Pony on this set is reason enough to buy this set...

This next Set Completes the Rainbowtized Mane 5... Assuming Dashie Died and became assimilated by the rest... (So much angst) This set is a 5 Pony Set...
It Starts with Worst Pony, Element of Greed, Rarity, Then it has The Twilicorn Princess herself, the Silly Pony Applejack, the Pony with the Power of Wubs, DJ PON-3 and last but not least a Pony Popular with the Bronies... Especially those who enjoy a show from the other Side of the Pond...


YES YES YES YES YES!! We ARE FINALLY GETTING A HASBRO FIGURE OF DOCTOR HOOVES!!
Sure it seems like he got a wibbly wobbly rainbow there... (Perhaps that's how Rainbows look in Gallopfrey) but that means that Hasbro has made a Doctor Hooves Mold... So he could come in normal colors in future Blind Bags!!
(Now if they make all 12 12.5 Regenerations of Doctor Hooves, I'm gonna be all Rainbow Dash)


Dec 21, 2013

In my days MTV used to stand for Music Television

Now there's less music but more morons... I remember the days when I loved to watch music videos on MTV and it hit me... Why don't I rant about my favorite Music videos that ARE NOT THAT SONG... So I'll do ten videos that I can watch again and again... That do not have Michael Jackson, because he took videos to a different level.

Let's start with a song that I remember more from the video than from the song... I love the song and have it on my MP3 player, but the full magic of it only works when watching the video.


STAY AWAY FROM MAI WAIFU OR I'LL MAKE Kowlkebabs
This video is trippy as heck... Jumping inside a comic book, a Monkey Wrench fight, being in a relationship with a cartoon character... Yeah... that last part is a bit creepy... so let's back away from the cartoon loving thing and let's comment on how she DID NOT PAY for her coffee and left the diner...
Also, has anyone of you gotten so drunk that you bump into the walls like the dude in the video? I have not... I've bumped into the walls sober while listening to the song...

Now, I could Top this with ANYTHING Involving Michael Jackson, but that would be cheating...
This one, I blame my younger cousin since it's from the Boyband Wars era...

It kinda has this Michael Jackson inspired vibe from it. This is not my favorite BSB song, but it's my favorite BSB video... Their in synchronization competition's videos weren't that great though, but I liked them better as a band... Holy crap! I just gave away my side on the Boy band wars!!

Speaking of my favorite BSB song, not posting the video on the list, but that song was pretty popular and a group of friends of mine (myself included) used to sing it to mock the video. T'was weird and awesome breaking into song at random moments and synch up pretty well. I'd make fun of Hanson, but they are a million times better than One Direction

I'm feeling that I should mention Meatloaf... While there are plenty of songs to choose, I had to go with I'd do anything for love (but I won't do that)

for obvious reasons. The song is catchy, but the video kicks ass! As much as I hate Praising Hollywood's Great Satan, this awesome video was made by Michael Bay... Seriously, he should stick to music videos. Busting through walls with a bike as if he was the Kool-Aid man! Monster Meatloaf rules! Seriously, it's got Bay written all over it, how could I not notice! Even when he's all creepy stalker, he still looks badass... (Being a creepy monster stalker is bad, kids! don't do it in real life!) Seriously, Meatloaf's Stalker levels are off the scale! He stalks the lady the good old fashioned way. He stalks her with his magic Crunk cup, watching her take a bath with her clothes on, but he completely ignores the pseudo-orgy with Succubi happening behind him? Oh... That's the "THAT" he won't do... He'll spy her using a weird contraption that even makes her lounge chair float, but watching the intro to a Cinemax soft core special is a big no-no to him... He may be a creepy stalker, but he has his limitations.

but speaking of creepy stalkers, Here's my next pick!

Yeah, yeah, I know there are better picks for a Lionel Richie video from a visual point of view, but to keep on with the creepy theme, I chose Hello.
Seriously, this video is creepy as heck! He's some sort of creepy teacher stalking a blind student...
If this happened today:
He's all: Hello! Is it me you're looking for?
She's all: I'm blind you #$%ing dumbass! How can I be LOOKING for you! Insensitive prick! Also quit stalking me! POLICE! LIONEL RICHIE TRIED TO RAPE ME!!

Although the actors in the video look older, it somehow has this "High school" vibe... which makes it even creepier. Calling her by phone at night and staying silent...

But again, keeping with the creepy theme...

Tom Green's Bum Bum song... It made the top on TRL but since TRL lacked the LIVE part of the Requests, they Coerced Green to retire the song... I guess he regrets putting his bum on the cheese...

but speaking of people who put their bum on things...

Yes, it's time for the Mandatory Miley Cyrus video...

Don't worry, it won't be a Hannah Video, since those tend to suck, because it's just Hannah Montana Prancing on a stage but at the same time it won't be a post-Hannah Miley video where she licks stuff and thinks she's Tom Green...




My Miley video is rather tame...

THIS is the Miley I miss... Not dressed up in weird fursuits or plastic pants 2 sizes too small and not Tom Greening everything in sight... Even the Mileyrena section of the video is way better than the Hammer licking...  Now as much as I dislike Miley's new image, I have to admit that her Wrecking ball song is good. I'm not going to do an extensive rant on this song since it's an obvious trippy dream sequence. If I wanted to make a rant I could use Wrecking Ball and suggest that the scenes of Miley making out with the hammer are references to a secret crush she had on Thor...

This next video is from one of my EARLIEST MP3 FILES... I had forgotten for a long time that a video of this song existed.

The video is nothing out of the Ordinary... It's only Jennifer Love Hewitt jumping around while singing about the I Know what you did Last Summer dude...
This made it to TRL cause she was dating Carson Daly...

That's Seven Down and THREE To Go!! Who are the Top 3 NON-Michael Jackson videos that I love to watch/Listen? Stay tuned to this very rant because they're coming up next!!


Next on my list:

You have no Idea how I HATED THIS Video... Little kids LOVED THE HECK OUT OF THIS...
I can go on a murderous spree while listening to this song... (Perfect song to mow the lawn... It gets me angry enough to mutilate and possibly murder grass!) Nothing like the smell of freshly mutilated plant life to make you feel all Summertime happy, right? Best part is that I KNOW ZERO FRENCH, so I cannot understand how tough is to be a baby... which totally makes sense. Adults do not understand babies, so they don't know how hard it is to be one...
dur dur d'être  adulte doesn't have the same ring to it.
yes, that is Jordy, all-grown-up...
 Heck his music was banned from France, to avoid exploitation, they claim... I think it's more to avoid another French Revolution...

All jokes aside. I love using this video to torture my younger brother, who LOVED this song as a kid...
Now the video is not remarkable... Seeing the man in Tightie Whities is  a bit disturbing, but it's a French video, so it's artsy... Irresponsible parents, not really. They are showing how trusty they are and that their babies are independent enough to go on a boat ride all alone...The song is catchy on its own... the Cringeworthy stuff IS the video... Sorry, it's a European video so it is Fine Art... (Insert Snobbish laugh here)



So, let's leave the little French Kid alone and move to out Next Video, one that I've used a couple of times for a couple of rants, due to the theme of said rants...
Paramore's Decode... The best thing related to Twilight: the movie... There is nothing remarkable on the video, but due to it having clips from the movie and the band in the forest (or A forest similar to the one from the movie) as if they're there singing... which begs the question, all that electric equipment is being powered by? Seriously, I don't hear any generators giving power to the instruments, amps and microphone... Also, it's funny seeing the band Twilighting it up... ie. standing around like constipated idiots... I could have gone with another song from another movie, that's been overplayed, but this video I mostly ignored. The non-Daredevil version of this video, I've not seen, so that's why I went with Decode... Also, the sooner I can Forget Garner as Elektra, the better...

This is it guys, The Final Video... The Top Ten are nearly OVER!! To pick my Number one, I had to do a huge Purge on my list... Eternal favorites of mine did not make the cut, Not even Queen... and there's a LOT of stuff to choose from Queen... Ask Vanilla Ice... (BTW it sounds like He's saying Ass, Ass, Baby)

How many of you were actually surprised that my NUMBER ONE VIDEO IS THIS!?
Sure, I could have used any video from any Disney Animated Feature, but I only do those once in a blue moon. Also, I kept Disney to a Minimum since I put up Miley... That's why Billy Ray is nowhere to be seen on the list.

BONUS VIDEO:

The one video that was CLOSE Enough to make it to the list but did not... One shall stand and one shall fall... He-Man stood, Transformers fell. 

Dec 20, 2013

Hello Kitty and KISS!?

It could happen only on the HUB! How in the name of Celestia I did not know about this crossover!?
Seriously, these WTF things ARE what I live for!!!



This is far more messed up than getting a Roided out Blue Stan Lee

We've seen Gene Simmons on Tony Hawk's Underground (BTW, WTH is Tony Hawk doing currently?)





So, mix KISS with this:


No idea when this Mash-up is happening.

Well, not all Mash-ups are good...
and here we got one of the bad ones...


WWE's Scooby Doo Mash-up looks Crappy...

Yeah, Miz! It looks crappy. In fact, I'm ashamed that you're in it... Seriously, you could have gone back to the MTV challenges if you wanted to be in something Crappy...
I know it's going to be crappy...

It's a shame that a certain wrestler has been gone for years (not being under the WWE wellness Program standards)


So, this Not Cool Scooby Doo movie will hit DVD on March 2014...

Dec 19, 2013

Cartoon Network executives are absolute dip****s!

Damn my self imposed rule of not Cursing in written form... I read this article on i09 (a site I despise due to their banning of Rob Bricken's Fan Fiction Friday... Because Fan-fic writers got butt hurt at him criticizing their fanfics... Seriously, if you write a pseudo romantic fanfic about Sherlock Holmes getting enemas from Watson, or Twilight Sparkle turning Rainbow Dash into a Hermaphrodite human to have sex with her, then you deserve the mocking criticism...) Let's just say that I'm not a fan of this site... But this Article caught my attention:
Paul Dini: Superhero cartoon execs don't want largely female audiences

Now go read it... I'll wait.

OK, so we get CRAP shows like Uncle Grandpa and Teen Titans Go! whose only good thing is having the real Teen Titans voice cast... (I Tara Strong, Greg Cipes is cool too! and Robin is Ma-Ti... and no post would be complete without me praising the Tara Strong!) BECAUSE they want to appeal to young male viewers so they buy the toys...

Let's use Young Justice as an example: Those toys were unbuyable... The smaller scaled ones were CRAP! The Larger toys were overpriced because of the nearly useless bases. It was a lose-lose situation... (and this comment adds up to the many reasons why I'll never get free samples from Mattel.)

This "Girls don't buy toys, therefore we don't want girls in our audience" crap is...

downright insulting. OK, so let's go with that notion that girls don't buy action figures... So, if girls don't buy items geared at boys, then how about doing items geared towards them?
 Before anyone starts bitching about Black Canary's Fishnet Stockings. THAT IS WHAT THE COMIC BOOK CHARACTER WEARS.
These were part of an Adult Collector Barbie Line... DC Heroes made with Barbie Bucks? How can't they sell these to girls again?
OK, if we were to assume that they'd be for Young Justice, Black Canary could have gotten Grey Tights as seen in the Cartoon shown on the right. If the "geniuses" at Marketing can't figure out how to market to both Genders, it's THEIR Fault.

This reminds me of She-Who-Musn't-be-Named and her bullcrap crusade against sexism in videogames... The idea is good, it's her methods what I disapprove of. These Dumbass executives are what allow People like You-Know-Who... 

and, no I'm not talking about Lord Voldemort... to tick people into donating money for opinion pieces passed off as facts. Executives like these dumbass pieces of crap, are the reason why freaking good shows get the can (200X MOTU, 201X Thundercats, Young Justice) and we get absoulute TURDS for shows in their place (Incredible Crew, Level Up!, Uncle Grandpa, Annoying Orange)

Guess what? Great shows that are liked BEYOND THE TARGET AUDIENCE bring forth new customers... Do I need to point out the show for Little Girls that I FREAKING LOVE and have a buttload of Merchandise of?



I'm sure as Hell that I am NOT NEAR the Target demographic of this show... Why do I support it, If I'm not it's Target Audience? BECAUSE THE SHOW IS GOOD AND IT'S MARKETED WELL...
OK, so I buy the actual toys. I don't buy the panties or socks, but I got a Brony Shirt from Hot Topic. I've got bedroom curtains, If you're a regular here, you know that I also have the Toothbrush, a plush, and other items. There are other venues to sell merchandise to those who don't buy the toys. It's all a matter of the Marketing guys actually DOING THEIR FREAKING JOB!

It's idiots like these why NERF had to make a SEPARATE Sub-Line for girls instead of selling their toys as unisex toys. Or why LEGO has to market a Separate Girls' Toyline that is not compatible with the Regular Sets.



Dec 18, 2013

Come with me if you want to live, Khaleesi

Looks like the Casting decision of Looking into Westeros was fruitful. Sarah Connor is now a Targaryen... (Last Sarah Connor was a Lannister... wait... If Cersei Lannister was Sarah Connor, does that Make John Connor Joffrey?)

All jokes aside, Emilia Clarke is now Sarah Connor and Old Man Ahnuld is the T-800... Well, the good news is that John Connor will not have my permission to die! No more Bane as Connor... WOOHOO!!

Besides this wouldn't be the first time Emilia Clarke has worked with a Conan...

Speaking of Conan and Game of Thrones people, Jason Momoa (Khal Drogo and the Other Conan) is likely to appear on the Battfleck movie... with Superman and Wonder Twig...

Who will he play? Remember that this movie is a set up to a Justice League Movie. He cannot be a pushover villain like Lex Luthor... Also, who'd dare to shave Khal Drogo's head to make him Lex Luthor. Doomsday could be an interesting choice, but I don't see it... Momoa's already typecast into Barbarian-esque roles, due to his physique... Now which DC Character could benefit from Momoa's "Exotic and Primitive" looks while being far too dangerous for Superman to handle alone?

Something more dangerous than Zod and Ra's al Ghul combined...

VANDAL SAVAGE... That's the only character I can think of. If the movie is going to be the set-up for JLA, having Savage rise to the point that Superman, Batman and Wonder Woman need to gather as many superbeings as possible to stop him is the only way... I mean the other threats to the DCU
would be aliens and we saw Ryan Reynolds beating Parallax on his own, we saw Superman stop the 3 Kryptonians... Darkseid, Starro, Mongul, etc. could be considered a bit too silly (and ripping off The Avengers' plot) to the non-comic book fans. Who else could they do?
Mister Mxyzptlk? Unless he's CGI and voiced by Gilbert Gottfried I don't want a Mister Mxyzptlk in the DCU movies... Besides there's no chance in Hell for that happening due to the Nolan "Realism" bull...

Dec 17, 2013

Next MOTU Cartoon NEEDS to expand the Universe.

Obviously the reason for this would be: SELL TOYS!! I'll explain further. The reason I mention the new cartoon, whenever it happens is because MOTU classics is on the decline... also New characters don't sit well with a line that is 87% Nostalgia fueled.

So, what do I mean with "Expand the Universe"?
Do the same thing Filmation and MYP did with characters like Delora, Hawke, Singrad, Queen Andreeeno, Ceratus, etc.

I know that Classics is kind of expanding the canon with the Masters of the Neitlichverse...(the whole Preternian-side with Sir-Laser-Lot and the Post He-Man era with Spector, Skeleteen and Dare)

but we still know next to nothing about the Cosmic Enforcers, the Trollan Overlords, the Guardians of Castle Grayskull (the He-Men of the past)
I understand that the toon's focus will most likely be He-Man, Skeletor, Castle Grayskull... BUT that does not mean that we cannot get extra nuggets of info about the Universe... I mean we did get those with past toons.

Expanding the universe by showing more about the other races on Eternia is the easy part. Now giving us insights on how their societies work, without making it incredibly dull for the kids is the hard part.

This would also apply to the Cosmic enforcers... Warning! Another rant on how the Enforcers could work as a tribute to a genre that MOTU hasn't made a tribute/parody lies ahead.



Think about it: The cosmic enforcers already scream SENTAI... I know what you're thinking.

A Squad of Cosmic Enforcers could ruin the whole Zodac dynamic on Eternia.

And I'd say that you're Correct, but only if they are misused. Zodac works on Eternia Alone.
(More Backstory for Zodac the Enforcer. Perhaps combine with the Kar-Tor and Zeelahr incident, which can be used to justify why Zodac works alone.)
Other Enforcers can be used when Introducing Strobo. Having Strobo as the Leader of this Squad.

(More backstory can be added with Strobo being part of the original team that disbanded after Zeelahr's death and Kar-Tor's Thirst for Revenge. Somehting about Strobo proving himself worthy of being a leader on his own right and ascending the ranks of the enforcers to leader of his own squad)

These "Enforcer ideas" stemmed out of making "New Characters" but without using any New pieces ON the Characters. (That's why there are no Female enforcers... Tooling Issue, not Misogyny). I even gave a Gimmick to one of them *Glowing in the Dark!* The weapons would require new pieces, but that's one item that even Mattel's in-house team could take care of...
I mean, I'm not say them MAKE THESE GUYS! what I'm saying is that with the huge parts library we have in MOTU, making more enforcers is a piece of cake!

Of course, if they want to go with a more Alien or bestial design, new heads would be required... Like a Spelean Enforcer or a Qadian one would require Enforcer helmets matching their non-"human" features.

If I were to make a Female Enforcer, I'd start with the Battleground Teela body, New "Skirt", Old Teela thighs (The 1.0 Articulation is Very Important) I'd probably use the She-Ra boots or Adora ones In order to keep the Articulation there as well. The Torso Armor would start with the Shield Maiden Armor with a new piece based on the Male enforcer armor that plugs on the Shield Maiden's Armor hole.

It would keep with the Tradition of making new characters while making some mix-and-matches with past pieces. Not to mention it adds a tribute to an unexplored genre in MOTU... and one of the media sensations that finished burying MOTU in the early 90s... Well, in all fairness MOTU was already dead when the Rangers showed up... but you get the idea. (and Mattel making a humanoid Turtle character would be a bit too obvious)

Another thing that Mattel needs to do is secure the rights to the cartoon characters. They don't need another blunder like not having the rights to do Filmation characters or Movie Versions of He-Man, Skeletor, etc.

But, the previous posts are just the ramblings of one fan who has no idea what Mattel may have up its sleeves. I still strongly belief that Mattel will sell more toys if it nurtures the brand beyond being a simple vehicle to sell toys. Again, look at what Hasbro did with their little girl toyline that gained a rabid fanbase composed of adult men... in addition to their target audience.

Dec 16, 2013

Adventure Ponies 2: More of the same

A long time ago (Last year), the Hub Network made a game based on a My Little Pony ad.

Well, the game was fun... though repetitive. You had to replay all 6 levels with each pony you unlocked.


The Hub made a sequel... Which took me a long time to play due to it being Geolocked...
But I finally played it... and it's a sequel...(duh!) but at the same time it feels like the same game. You get six new characters... Though they are locked and you must unlock them by beating the game.
Big MacIntosh and Zecora work like Applejack did in the First Adventure Ponies
Shining Armor and Fancy Pants work like Rarity or Twilight
Soarin' and Spitfire work like Rainbow Dash.

There are no Characters like Pinkie Pie or Fluttershy that act like Hybrids. Fluttershy works like a Pegasus but with an Earth Pony ranged attack (The Stare) and Pinkie Pie is an Earth Pony (needs to climb stairs) with a Unicorn styled attack (Her Party Cannon).

The levels are more complicated than in the previous game. Better jumping skills are requiredin Adventure Ponies 2 than in the original.
The Bosses are a bit more varied... Some you attack directly, others you attack indirectly. Trixie is invincible unless you get the Alicorn Amulet.

I cannot rate this game normally since there is no real story and graphically speaking it's a modern era game in a pseudo retro-look.

Like I said way up above, it's fun but repetitive... I'd say it's one of the better flash games on the Hub's site.

If you want to try the game, go here:  Enjoy!

Dec 15, 2013

MOTUC cost about 2 dollars to make... Let the chaos begin!

Somebody found out that to make a MOTUC figure it costs about $2 to make.  The Article is in Spanish, so Google Translate it if you don't speak/read Spanish...
I'll summarize it:
The Sales Representative for the Factory that does MOTUC among other things revealed that
it costs them about $2 to make a figure ($1.9 to $3.5) I suppose the Large scale items are more expensive. This is making the figure, painting it and packaging it. The minimum for their orders is 1000 and they have the capacity to make 500,000 figures in a month.

Of course this is making people think about MOTUC's costs...

Now, I'm not defending Mattel here, but it's got to be more than $2 per figure here.
The $2 there covers assembling, painting and packaging the figure and their minimum is 1000
So, that's $2000 there to make an order. (assembly, painting and packaging of the figures.) I'm not certain if that includes the costs on Raw Materials.(Plastics, Cardboard, etc.)

Transporting the figures from China to the US costs money... I guess we're paying that bill as well.
Then there's the Fourhorsemen Studios stuff... I know they love MOTU and they make stuff in their free time like the Battle Ram, but they don't work for free. So, I suppose that Mattel must recover the costs of hiring the 4Horsemen from somewhere.

Let's be honest here: Mattel isn't doing this out of love, well they are, but their love is for
the almighty Dollar... and I'm not talking about Macaulay Culkin's dog...
Money, Moolah, Dinero, that's what moves Mattel to make MOTUC figures.
This is something we all know and have to live with.

Mattel did sell MOTUC to Big Lots! who ended up selling them at $10 including giants like Megator and the Mo-Larr and Skeletor 2-pack. If Big Lots! made a profit by selling them at $10 then Mattel's Profit Margin on these must be rather large.

Hmm... I think I now get that quote I read from an article regarding Black Friday the other day:


The common assumption is that retailers stock up on goods and then mark down the ones that don't sell, taking a hit to their profits. But that isn't typically how it plays out. Instead, big retailers work backward with their suppliers to set starting prices that, after all the markdowns, will yield the profit margins they want.
 So, companies still make a profit even with the slashed prices. Assuming the previous sentence is true then Mattel's last 7 days of Cyber Monday sale feel even more pathetic now.

I know it seems messed up, but this whole "Factory makes each figure for $2" thing, but like I stated before, that's one part of the process... Something that we do not have all the information on all the steps and costs. Before we get people running to get the pitchforks and torches, remember that we do not have all the information and yes, Mattel will obviously have a considerable profit margin in order to do these toys. So, we could speculate until the cows come home, but without all the info, our aim would be worse than a squad of Stormtroopers shooting the broad side of a barn! Some could make more educated guesses than others, but at the end of the day they're just guesses.

Hell, even my argument is based on guessing and speculation!





Dec 14, 2013

Another Reboot? Surely you must be joking!

Yep...I am serious... and don't call me Shirley.
I suppose the Final Insult wasn't so Final...


Yes, Ladies and Gentlemen: Naked Gun is getting a reboot. Part of me is worried, as always... but there's another side of me that wants to give this a chance. I mean Ed Helms can be funny and he does have a resemblance to Leslie Nielsen... Problem is that Ed Helms is KNOWN for comedic roles while the funniest joke on the Naked Gun series was Serious Dramatic Actor, Leslie Nielsen in a comedic role.

It's like having Jason Statham in a comedic role...

While I'm not too fond of Rebootmania... This one I may give a chance...
The scary part was the OTHER Reboot that is coming... Paramount Pictures seems interested in making a Hofftastic Reboot...



While we're at it, we need a Baywatch Nights Sequel...


Dec 13, 2013

Venom and Sinister Six Spin-Offs... Really?

Oh Sony... Methinks you're biting off more than you can chew. Rhino, Electro, and the Not So Green Goblin... there were hints at the Six in the trailer and getting them for 3 might be a pain... Fitting Ock (Who should have been a villain on his own movie), Kraven, (who should have been in the same movie AS the Lizard) Vulture (OK Vulture is a bit easier to fit in as a "minor villain") Sandman, who cannot carry a movie on his own (as seen on Sam Raimi's Tobey-Man 3) and Mysterio... Who COULD carry a movie on his own, but it would be trippy as hell.

Seriously, if you're setting up a Sinister Six Movie, you should have, I don't know BEGAN THE FIRST MOVIE WITH ONE-TWO Origins of the Six... Perhaps, have Otto Octavius as one of the scientists at Oscorp (as much as I hate having Oscorp being the center of the universe, that would have been a nice nod to the fans.) Have Lizard as the Villain, while Kravinoff acting as a moderate nuisance...
Seriously, Manu Bennett could Pull a Kick-ass Kraven... Though if Oded Fehr bulks up a bit, he could pull it too!

Oh crap! No... They are making their own Six... Electro, Rhino, Not Green Goblin, Lizard, the hints of Vulture and Ock... Aw Hell no! Norman Osborn/Goblin is not and should NEVER BE a Member of the Sinister Six. Especially if there is an Otto Octavius in that team.

Before anyone DARES to mention the "Ultimate crappyverse" and how there the Goblin was a member and that this movie takes cues from that lame-ass Universe... I'll Let Mark answer this.

Thanks Mark! Maybe later we can play some football ha haha!

Yes, I know that this movie is taking cues from the inferior Ultimate Universe, but this is going to be a bad case of cramming TOO Much stuff into one movie. Because think about it... Sinister 6 Plus One other project that I've tried to ignore...


Venom... No Matter what version of the suit they make: Alien Symbiote or lame-ass Cancer suit, in order to make venom you need:
1 Peter Parker
1 Black Suit

Take the Peter Parker, Put it in the Black Suit then have him dump the suit like you'd dump an overly attached girlfriend...
































































































Come on! No pics?



























Ah, there we go! So once we do, that we attach the suit into a poor sucker... Preferably an Eddie Brock... Because Doing Venom Minus Spider-Man is like Making a Bizarro movie WITHOUT Superman.

So, For Amazing Spider-Douche 3 we have: Sinister Six and Possibly Black Suit.

SO, you can do the math here...

Third movie in a series with Multiple Villains
AND A Black suit... Nothing can come wrong out of that winning Combination...



Yup! NOTHING CAN GO WRONG...

Then after all that, we get the Venom Movie... Oh no... Lethal Protector...

Be afraid, be VERY AFRAID!!!

Dec 12, 2013

Matty Gift Cards: Another exercise in FAIL

Well, the Title says it all: Matty Gift cards SUCK!!
So, Mattel is giving people the chance to buy Matty Collector gift cards

$25, $50, or $100 cards...

It sounds nice but there's a catch:

Here’s how it works:
  • The giver places their order on MattyCollector.com and receives a downloadable gift certificate PDF with a gift code to send the recipient.
  • The recipient visits the MattyCollector.com Shop, makes their choices, and enters the coupon code during the Check Out process.
  • The recipient is happy, the giver is a hero.

IMPORTANT NOTE: Entire Gift Certificate must be spent in a single transaction. Any remaining balance cannot be accrued.Ready to grab a Gift Certificate? Click here to pick which one you want to give!
P.S. Toy fans — print out this page and leave it where your loved ones can see it. How will they know if you don’t tell them?

 ENTIRE GIFT CERTIFICATE MUST BE SPENT IN A SINGLE TRANSACTION. ANY REMAINING BALANCE CANNOT BE ACCRUED.
See what I mean by "There's a catch?" This is a case of One Step Forward and Two Steps Back!

Let's Look at it in a more detailed manner:

$25: You can't buy anything that Mattel has on sale WITHOUT having to spring extra money to pay for shipping costs and taxes. The closest thing would be the $15 set of stands, but even those require the normal card to pay for whatever the gift card did not cover.

$50: Well, now you can buy 1 Figure ($20 if it's DC, $22 if it's one of the straggling Venkmans, $27 if it's a MOTUC) With Shipping and Taxes you'd be around $40... So, now you need to spend that $10 or lose it to Mattel. Problem is that in order to spend that $10, you have to once again, use your own card to cover the difference.

OK, let's do THIS!! $100 burning in my pocket:

OK $100: 3 of the $27 figures Shipping and Taxes leave me about $4 under the $100!! Success!! Not so fast, Kemosabe... Are you willing to let Mattel walk away with $4 that belong to you and that if you don't spend them, you'll never see them again?

That's what I thought... Now whip out your card, because you're going to PAY... The price difference in shipping and taxes...

So, basically, you either pay with your money to maximize the use of the certificate given to you, or you let Mattel rip off the person who gives you the certificate...



let's humor Matty... The screencapture above  (taken Yesterday) is for a theoretical purchase. The End of Wars Weapons Pak (now with more Kowl) a $20 item. As I said before, shipping could make it with a $15 items, but the taxes will screw you over. in this case it's $29.90 with USPS ground (Taxes pending where applicable) See the promo code section? that's likely where the card info has to be put on. Now, doing this on a Sale Date *either Early Access or normal Day of* would be a dangerous game.
Horde Troopers sold out Really Fast, Cyber monday Teela sold out really fast. Hell! the reason this Promo Code section exists was a nightmare... (back when this blog was learning to walk... and I was a bit reluctant to do toy reviews) I'm talking about Battle Cat... back when Beasts were not in the Sub.
Many fought the RSOD and lost Battle Cat due to Mattel's Generosity...

Good thing I don't want free samples from Mattel...
This pic would definitely burn that bridge.
Can you see where I'm going with this? The already bumpy road that is Matty Collecting does not need another obstacle. Instead of being a good thing, This "Matty Money" ends up looking more like a SCREW YOU CUSTOMERS kind of thing due to the seemingly half-assed efforts and
seemingly not well-thought out plan. Their intentions might be good, but... It's Still Digital River who we're dealing with and they don't have the best record for these things... Then again, they're almost 4 years too late with this.

While my attitude about them is really negative, it's not a bad idea... It's only the execution what is pretty awful. So, to end this rant in a more positive note: ♫I'm getting Standor!♪ I know it's not too much to get excited about, but it's freaking Stan Lee! 

Dec 11, 2013

Dark Orko... makes me want to go Fisto on someone's ballsac!

Is the short version of the over the top dramatic NEEEEEERRRRRRRD RAGE!! That I'm feeling right now.
It's official! ORKO IS EVIL...

 BEHOLD the Ultimate Evil... Dark Orko, or Dorko for short... His O is a ring of fire...
He is Horny
and he is on fire...
Also, he's evil!! Did I mention the whole EVIL ORKO thing? Cause Orko is evil...

While I'm hung up on the whole Evil Orko thing, I HATE HATE HATE the design... It reeks of EXTREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEM!!!
I mean Look at that thing on the left...
Then Look at a picture of Orko...
The Real Orko, not that Dorko!
Don't worry, I posted one from the Christmas Special so you can compare Orko vs Dorko...

You will see the Orko Elements after going through the Leifeldizer Machine!
And thus The Floating shirt has been turned in something straight out of hell...


Instead of looking like Orko, it looks like Orko had been possessed by Zarathos...
The whole Evil Orko thing seems like a horrible idea, but the combination of that with this EXTREME! design is just ridiculous!!It reeks of Trying WAY TOO HARD! in all sense of the term. They're trying too hard to make Orko "badass" both visually and canonically.

While yes, Orko was originally the character that linked the children to the universe due to his child-like nature at times; that does not mean that we need to make him THE DEVIL just to make him cool!
To make Orko awesome, one must understand Orko. He is very awkward due to the fact that He's an interdimensional traveler whose innate abilities are hampered on Eternia.  From Wizard Prodigy to Court Buffoon. He is helpful (though he is a bit of a show off due to his former Wunderkind status. Now on Eternia, he must relearn pretty much everything that he could do effortlessly in Trolla. The reason why he seems content in the role of buffoon is because he can practice simple tricks while he adapts to the Eternian Dimension. that's how you work Orko into a more serious canon. Perhaps have him visiting the Sorceress so she can help him in his studies. Strengthening their bonds aside "knowing that Adam is He-Man."

This... Evil Orko is just lazy. Not that I'm completely opposed to it, but I don't buy the whole Orko was evil all along and he played the role of the fool to trick the Heroic Warriors. If we're going with the Dark Orko, I need to see his heel turn and learn what made him turn heel.

You can't just say: Orko is now the Devil and expect everyone to be OK with it. This is why I have a Hate-Love-Hate relationship with NU52 MOTU... They do some things right, but when they go wrong... Boy, do they go WRONG or what?
Right now Teela and Dorko are the 2 biggest wrongs in this continuity.

Dec 10, 2013

We have a Fast and Furious Wonder Woman...

And the reason I mention F&F has nothing to do with Paul Walker... So, put those pitchforks away!!
Batffleck vs Superkilla movie will have a Wonder Woman appearance... She will be played by Gal Gadot...
All I know is that she's Israeli, a model and she appeared in some F&F movies, which I have not bothered to see since Car movies are not my thing...

OK, I DID SEE Tokyo Drift... I blame my Temporary Need For Speed Underground phase...

Let's see if you see the RED FLAG I see?

I'll give you a hint... SHE'S A MODEL!!!
WW IS NOT A MODEL... Especially these Modern era Stick Figures that they call Models nowadays...
WW needs some meat on her bones...
Seriously, this girl seems too scrawny... She'd need to bulk up a lot in order to get a physique worthy of Wonder Woman.Something highly unlikely due to her being a Model.
She needs to look Less Runway, More Xena... I'm not saying that we NEED to get Lucy Lawless...
(I'd probably would have said that 15 years ago.) But if you look at Lucy when she was Xena, she looked strong and she still retained some femininity which is what Wonder Woman should look like...

Now this adds to my fears that DC is desperate to get into that Avengers money, because we're RE-INTRODUCING Batman AND we're INTRODUCING Wonder Woman.
OK, Superman stopped Zod in the First Man of Steel movie.
WHAT KIND OF THREAT is this big that it would need Superman, Batman AND Wonder Woman to stop?

They're tossing the BIG 3 in one movie so they can get to a Justice League movie? Why? This movie is going to be the JUST-US League movie already!!

DC seems to be ready to fail, cause Multiple villains with origins in one movie usually ends up in failure. Here we're doing the same but with the heroes.
We're so gonna have flashbacks to the whole Crime Alley incident. You can't do Batman if you don't do the whole Crime Alley thing.



Or we get a stylized nightmare

Not even Videogames are spared from the whole Crime Alley incident


so, we're VERY likely to get Crime Alley shoved down our throats once more. The whole Superman=Jesus thing from Man of Steel wasn't that Subtle (but a smidge subtler that what Hideo Kojima would have done) The tricky pieces here are Wonder Woman... And of course the villain.

So let's see: Repercussions from the Battle of Metropolis, Batman's Origin vaguely mentioned, Wonder Woman's Origins, The villain's Origins AND the Entire plot of the movie. Can you see WHY I am worried?


Dec 9, 2013

It Came from the Toy chest: Chomping stuff cause Cowabunga!

What Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles character is known to eat everything on its path? No, it's not Michelangelo at a Pizza buffet.
I'm talking about the MOUSER robot. Baxter Stockman's pesky little robots. They are a staple in the TMNT Universe.
These guys show up in MOST TMNT Continuities. *Live Action Movies and the awful Series Spin-Off being the exception.

The Mousers usually begin as Rat exterminating robots created by Baxter Stockman, who eventually uses them for Criminally oriented purposes. Eventually the turtles get involved and these guys become cannon fodder in most games (right after the foot Ninja)





So, now that we discussed a small background info on the Mousers, here they are. Playmates finally gave us a bunch of mousers in one fell swoop. Unlike Past versions of them who were Ridiculously Large, Pack-ins with another figure, or even worse: SDCC Exclusives WITHOUT CHOMPING MOUTHS...(I can't Forgive NECA for that!) This time we get a DECENT Number of Mousers... (Personally they should have made 9 of them... Will explain later)

So without further ado, let's do the Mousers.


  ARTICULATION:
The Mousers have a Hinjed Jaw on a ball jointed head and their legs are attached by a pin to the main body giving them 4 POA.
the little articulation that they have is functional, especially the head. It has a GREAT range of motion.
I'll be honest and say that I WISH they had Ankle Articulation.

3.5



PAINT AND SCULPT:


 Sculptwise, well, they look like the nickelodeon Mousers, whose design did not stray from the Classic Mouser Design.

Paintwise the only painted things are their eye and on the Black Mouser's case, the ridges inside the lower jaw are painted red.

4.0





ACCESSORIES:

Normally, here's where I'd rate the Accessories, but since this Mouser pack is pretty much the equivalent of an Accessory pack, then there's SEVEN Accessories. So, I cannot rate the Accessories section as I'd normally would.

OVERALL:
The MOUSERS get an Overall score of 3.75 which is pretty good. Not only that, but they work PERFECTLY with the Vintage line...
They obviously work with the nickelodeon line.
While they are a smidge too small for the NECA Turtles and the 2007 Movie toys, they are functional. In theory, they must be TOO small for the TMNT Classics Turtles (not shown since I have none). You know that I mentioned early on the review that they should have released 9 mousers instead of 7? Here's why? we have 3 Silver Mousers, 2 black Mousers and 2 Gunmetal Mousers. There is an imbalance of Mousers that some collectors might be bugged out about it. Now that we got the Mouser mold, I hope that characters that have no accessories can get Mousers as accessories.

Heck, even if you don't collect TMNT toys, these guys are a nice Easter egg to throw in Lab Dioramas... If I ever make a Man-at-Arms Lab Diorama, I'm so going to stick a Mouser and R2-D2 as hidden Easter eggs!

Dec 8, 2013

The Not so Suite Life of Zack vs Joe Jonas... and other stuff!

The Newest Disney Channel alumn feud is full of testosterone, cause there's ZERO females involved here!

Jonas made some comments to  New York Magazine, blaming Miley and Demi as the ones that introduced him to weed, how Disney is evil and how the Jonas Brothers were terrified of the Mouse eared Mafia. He was 17 when he first smoked weed... Miley was what? 14?
Big bad 17 Year old boy pressured to smoke weed by 2 girls who were 14 years old...


I love how he complains that he had to "shave every day in order to pretend he was a 16 year old."
Um, that's part of the contractual obligation when you're acting on a show. While you ARE NOT the character, you still PLAY the character and any  drastic changes in your image have to be consulted with the show's people. Normally a 16 year old won't have a scruffy beard. So, it makes sense thar you cannot grow a beard while you're working on the show. I once had toshave my head for a gig. I wanted to let my hair grow so badly, but I couldn't. I had to  Have a Mr. Clean-esque bald head for a month. It was part of the job and I had to comply. Some places have dress codes... Acting on TV shows movies and plays require some extra attention BEYOND a dress code.

In the end Jonas ended up sounding like a little bitch.

Throwing girls under the bus (Miley, Demi, Taylor Swift), being afraid of the Mouse because he would take away his career if he didn't dance to the Mouse's beat... Seriously? Wasn't he like, part of a Band or something? IF the Mouse turned them down, I'm sure others would've taken them.

So, after that article began to float on the web, people went to Dylan Sprouse's Tumblr...
Where Mr. Sprouse calls on the Jonas Bullshit. And Holy crap! I have to side with the former Danimals kid!

Truth be told, I would have probably done the same thing as the Jo-Bro If I had been in his shoes... but without the whole whining afterwards and I would never admit the whole "Miley made me smoke weed" thing. But then again, if he didn't believe in the potential he and his bandmates/brothers had, then it's completely justified how they "stifled their creativity" in order to "rake in the cash".

Hillary Duff, Raven, The Sprouse Twins, Selena Gomez, Emily Osment and many others did not turn out as desperate people needing help. Like the piece of Poultry above... (I got to stop summoning the Twerkey) and Demi who had a meltdown (hence the evolution of Sonny with a Chance into So Random!)

Guess who's coming back to Arrow?

Guess I cannot tell you...

OK, this is ridiculously funny in a "I can't believe the horrible timing of this!" kind of way.

OK, so now you know the show... Here's the thing that made people wince, groan and feel angry:

T H E ##S T #N D
T H E ##R###S


In all fairness, the episode was taped LONG before that event happened. It was just aired at an awkward date.

Dec 7, 2013

THAT'S The Amazing Spider-Douche's Green Goblin!?

He kinda looks like the Super Friends version of Solomon Grundy.

 I mean, Click on the link to open it... Go back and look at the Grundy pic on the left.

Can you see the Resemblance?







Needless to say:


I'm sorry but that thing looks LESS Green Goblin than the Sam Raimi Green Power Ranger Goblin...
Why is it TOO FREAKING HARD TO MAKE SOMETHING CLOSER TO THIS!?

OK so we can change the Spandex to something to look a bit more armored, but keeping the Goblin Elements...

"Oh, but the mask is too silly!"
OF COURSE THE MASK IS FREAKING SILLY!! Norman is supposed to be Freaking INSANE!! With the Appearance of a Costumed Crime fighter and the Menagerie of FREAKS showing up (in this case Lizard, Electro and Rhino)

And Speaking of Rhino... Here's a pic  of him!


I mean, it's the only way they could have done Paul Giamatti without it looking Incredibly Ridiculous...

Then again, I can see another thing instead of Rhino. He reminds me of a super bulked up Crying Wolf
I've already ranted about how much I dislike The Ultimate Electro

I still stand by my opinion... The whole Hoodie look is a bit lame. There's a pic of Electro wearing a special suit, but it's mostly black... BLEGH!!

So fans did a few manips and some gave him the Classic colors... You know what? I LIKE IT!!

Yeah, the Green and Yellow might be a bit corny, but we're dealing with a movie about a guy with Spider powers who wears a RED AND BLUE BODYSUIT... WE ARE ALREADY IN CORNY TERRITORY!! I love how the fan who made this Photo Manipulation added Energy in the classic "Starfish shape" to create his "mask". Sadly, this cool take on Electro won't happen and we'll be stuck with the monochromatic movie version...

On a more positive note: If we have a Goblin and we have a Gwen...
I guess we are going to see Gwen kick the bucket!! Goblin Induced death, as it should be... but still, that Goblin looks like Solomon Grundy instead of the Green Goblin... What's Next!? Mysterio WITHOUT The Fishbowl?

Nope, Not Mysterio Sans fishbowl, but THE Trailer itself!


And of course I'm going to rant about it!!
I want to Johnny Cage everyone involved with this movie.
OS-Freaking-CORP is behind everything and that plainly sucks ass!

this movie has "Wait for it to come on DVD and watch it at a store for free"
vibe to it.
It's that bad... It's Batman and Robin Bad...

Dec 6, 2013

Firing Neitlich good idea or bad idea?

Cyber Monday  Geoblock-gate... (I'm pronouncing it like Geoduck cause it sounds cuter than the normal Geo as in Geography) happened and there's a few people that have gone Queen of Hearts...


Their Target: Scott "Toyguru" Neitlich. I understand their rage and frustration... I was Geoblocked as well. The thing is that Mattycollector and Digital River have had a long tale of disaster after disaster. People GET FED UP WITH THIS CRAP! and want some real resolution. Neitlich is the easiest target, due to his Manager Status and basically being the Public Face of Matty Collector (that doesn't have to wear the Matty Costume)

Firing Toyguru won't Solve ANYTHING. Sure some of his answers regarding issues are simply:

and oh how I love to rant about those!!
Thing is that regarding THIS Particular issue, he's going with whatever Digital River has told him.
And Digital River isn't well loved by many people... Ask the Ni No Kuni fans... They got Digital River'd! This is the same Digital River that told me that they NEVER SHIP To Puerto Rico...  But they do... except when I'm Geoblocked... like last Monday! So, if Mattel (or in this case Scott Neitlich) gets some BS excuse from Digital River, then he can only parrot the answer they gave him. then we call the answers BS and the cycle is complete...

So... We take Scott Neitlich out of the equation... We fixed Nothing. Digital River will screw up... Look at the Ni No Kuni issue. That was with Namco Bandai, not Mattel. They did not have Scott Neitlich and Digital River STILL MANAGED TO Screw it up!

Now, Let's Take Scott Neitlich out of the equation again... Remember DCUC? that Line that Scott Neitlich was involved with, but then he was replaced by Fangirl 2.0
I know this is going to sound like I'm throwing Fangirl 2.0 under the bus... but she was pretty much useless compared to Toyguru... To the point that they "pushed her to Superman so Neitlich could come back and try to salvage the DC Line. While she had a bit more Tact than Toyguru and her answers weren't as Facepalm worthy, She was almost invisible... compared to Toyguru...

Right now we're at the "Last 2 years of MOTUC"  (almost the same position that DCUC was when they brought in FG2.0) and do we really need a new manager at this stage of the game?
Changing Managers this late in the game is a stupid move.

Better the devil You know and all that...

It would be easier to shut down Neitlich's pet Project after moving him to other stuff, than put someone else who has to "learn" how MOTUC works (4Horsemen, Digital River, the rabid fanbase, etc.) So, allowing Neitlich to ride this pony till the end is the most sensible thing. Keeps some awareness of the brand while the movie is stuck in Development Hell. Gave Mattel a library of pieces to create some commemorative figures in future years, etc.

Love him or hate him, Scott Neitlich IS NEEDED for this line to continue (at least until the end of the 2015 wrap-up) Sure, he may have shoved us Nepthu, his own Spector and Geoff Johns' Sir-Loser-Lot, but on the other hand we somehow ended up with Adora, Queen Marlena,Shadow Weaver, we'll get Madam Razz Next year... Not sure how far was Scott's involvement in getting these characters but we got them... Changing the manager at this stage would be moronic.

So, to answer my own question, firing Neitlich is a bad idea. Because he's the Manager MOTU deserves, but not the one it needs right now. So, we'll hunt him, because he can take it. Because he's not our Manager. He's a silent guardian. A watchful protector. A Dark Knight... or something...