Apr 30, 2016

Vultak is FINALLY shipping and other stuff...

Finally, he shipped on the 29th of April... Almost in MAY... Matty, get your crap together!! Meanwhile, Neitlich has been asking people to cut the new team some a lot of slack... The same team that has pinned ALL THEIR BONERS on Neitlich and threw him under the bus last SDCC... That says a lot about Neitlich. He's making the new team look so bad...

Punisher is coming to Netflix. as in getting his own show...
Daredevil, Luke Cage, Iron Fist, and now Punisher... That's 4 Shows based on Marvel Properties on Netflix... Before you ask "What about Jessica Jones?" I say Jessica Jones can jump in a lake of fire.
I TRIED to like the show, I just couldn't. 3.5 episodes in and I'm more invested in Inspector Gadget sequel... and damn that's just awful... (sorry T.Strong, but the show blows) but Jessica Jones blows harder. Damn the cheesy Stephenie Meyeresque dialogue!!

Before I get "sexist, soggy Knee Stick" remarks, hear me out:
The show is not empowering. She has super powers, but most of her actions are to ride Luke Cage's Unbreakable penis, or stop The Purple Doctor.
She's a Private investigator who stumbles through the clues dropped on her lap... She knows how to use bing! EMPOWERING!! she figured Killgrave's MO, because she WAS A Killgrave victim... Great detective skills there!
Oh it's empowering because Carrie Anne Moss finally gets to play an androgynous lesbian... Wait, that's not it...
Perpetuating Victim Culture... There we go! That's the mighty empowerment that gives this show the 3rd wave seal of approval. Man is evil abuser of women and women are victims of men... because Patriarchy...

At least There's no way they can ruin Punisher... I hope!

Batman v. Superman The R Rated cut is Bigger, Longer, but not so sure if it's uncut... over 181 minutes of Zack Snyder's BvS... Sadly, showing proof that your mother's name is Martha will not let you get a free copy of the movie.


Apr 27, 2016

It came From the Toy Chest: Blackface He-Man is racist...

Vultak is late... Luckily, my Anti-Eternia He-Man isn't. No, I'm not trying to rub it on your face that *I* was able to get one during the 3 minutes of Hell that was his sales period.
Who is he?
Basically Bizarro World He-Man... He's the He-Man of a world where Evil is good and Good is evil... NO Vampire in Brooklyn clips today, Spike!! Also, he comes from a German audiobook or radio play... can't remember exactly.

I originally was planning to copy and paste the Original He-Man Review and add some random "But EVIL!!" in it, but that would be way too lazy... Even for me.
everything He-Man can do, so can Anti Eternia He-Man
I must point out the red card was a nice touch... what wasn't so nice was the excessive amount of restraints that this figure had: clear Rubber bands, White straps and a black tissue paper ropes holding him in place.


Articulation:
cool effect in the eyes
Nothing New Here he's Traditional MOTUC Articulation all the way. He sports the 2.0 boots without visible pegs, so his ankles are tighter than normal He-Man.
4.5

Paint and Sculpt:
A Little Red and white Paint in some areas and some metallic paint in others on a Black Plastic Body is not that much to screw up. The sculpt we've seen a million times... It's Vanilla He-Man in Blastic.
4.5 Seriously, with this being a no new tooling figure that we pay MORE for, you could have totally used some Red GITD paint for the eyes.

Accessories:
Break the walls down!!
Sword, Shield, Ax, Alcala Sword, Grayskullman Shield and my harness is glued to his back... WHY!? Also, couldn't we have gotten a Vikor ax in black as well? I mean y'all sprung up 2 Power Swords, 2 Shields, since y'all didn't tool new items, the extra Ax would have gotten the extra oomph! this figure needed.
4.5

Overall:
Anti Eternia He-Man gets a 4.5 as his final score. He's pretty cool, but a few Blunders/wasted opportunities kept him from being better. Now if you're a German fan, he's a must have for you... Mostly due to nostalgic attachments. Me? All I keep seeing is "get 2 more of these and swap Ninjor's armor with them"... (even if it means cutting the Harnesses.)
Teela's going to need a Wheelchair soon... Times like this is when
I regret painting her hair red. It would have worked better with a
Blonde Teela... I just noticed Teela's hand right now...
That was unintentional but it works in the context of the pic.







Teenage Adam is a Perfect MOTUC second SDCC Exclusive.

Rumor has it that we MAY GET Starburst She-Ra as an SDCC Exclusive...
Well, I have an idea for another exclusive that may be an Unexpected curve ball... (or could be used for 2017 theoretically speaking)
Teenage Prince Adam aka 200X Adam...
What if I told you that we could get MORE out of that:
I mean Teen Adam would need some Modulok limbs, like Lizard Man...
So we'd need a new Slim Human torso... preferably with Ab crunch.
Using Modulok's Modular joints, as seen with Lizard Man, we COULD make this Adam a 2 for 1 like his mom.

The only new pieces needed would be:
New torso and crotch: The crotch would be based on 200X Adam's pants. The 200X Belt should be a removable add on in order to allow for a Vintage inspired Loincloth.
Both Tunics should be removable. Here is where they add a notch to put the power sword on the back for Vintage Adam's tunic. for the 200X one, I made the tunic and undershirt in one piece (like Sea Hawk's in order to have the belt that's supposed to be part of the sheath for his sword and complete the shirt look for him.
New shin pieces with the furry boot in Modulok size.
2 sets of new forearms: Vintage bracers and 200X gloves.
If we're lucky a closed 200X sword could be tossed in with him.

Combine these with a couple of previously made parts snake Armor head for 200X, Adam's smirk head for Vintage, Vykron gloves for 200X Adam and normal hands for vintage Adam and call it a day.

It could make a difference in packaging: 200X form for SDCC, Vintage form for Matty, this allows people to double dip on him... and it even allows for Mattel to release a repaint of him with a Dare head instead to have DARE! Heroic Secret Identity of He-Ro 2.0

Also, it's Prince Adam... Well known enough for SDCC or something.

Apr 26, 2016

Odds and ends 4/26/2016: More Not Rita and more Spidey...

More Not Rita Repulsa pics have appeared on the Internet.
And all I can think of that these and J-Law as Mystique in X-Men: Poepocalypse are secret promos for The Mocking Jay Part 3: Peeniss is a real thing!

20 minutes on MSPaint
Oh, but Rita's design is corny as hell... True, but you CAN take some Rita elements and translate it to the new design. I made the crude drawing seen above using a female body template. Took elements from both Rita and the Dragonzord. (Seeing that they went green to connect Rita to the Dragon Caesar.) It's not Bandora, but the brown skirt is kinda there with some of the gold designs, the Dragonzord chestplate is her chestplate now... I tried to fit in the pointy boobs, but they wouldn't work. I have her braids, tied with brown ribbon as a nod to the original horned hair. The cape is simply there to add her large collar. Her skin is a shade of green to keep the inhuman look and to tie it to the Dragon Zord. But what do I know?



Ooh! Spidey!

There may be hope for you... Can't wait for Civil War... (I also can't believe that I said that... While we're at it, I can't believe it's not butter either! I can't believe that Burger King does Hot Dogs now...)
I honestly hope that Sony doesn't screw up Spidey... They lost Michael Keaton, who was rumored to play Vulture... Seriously, Freaking Michael Keaton playing vulture, would have been all kinds of awesome sauce... If they do Morbius, may I suggest Tommy Wiseau?

Apr 25, 2016

god of war collection Part III: God of War III I really need to take a God of Breaks...

Crate Ass is still looking for the revenge he was denied of.
Right out of the end of GoW II, III starts and it looks like a True PS3 game right out of the bat... The Final GoW game delivers Crate Ass' vengeance... or does it fall flat on his ass? Let's find out.

Story:
I am Kratos, hear me RAWR!! Revenge story continues. His objective is still the same as GoW II.
7.5

Music and Sounds:
I could say the same thing I've said before: The music is pretty good, some themes have been in all 3 games, the VA deliver great Voicework... This time we get the Hercules we deserve...
and we pretty much smash his face in.
9.5

Controls:
Small changes were made once again... What's the deal with changing configuration in each game on most game series?
9.0

Gameplay:
Same thing as the past two. This time there are more enemies about and doing combos can be more deliciously evil!
QTEs seem a bit less difficult here.
8.5

Graphics:
Since this WAS A PS3 Game, the difference between GoW II to III is enormous! The backgrounds are more gorgeous, the monsters have lots of detail and the gore is much more disgusting in this more realistic looking entry,
8.5

Overall:

God of War III gets an 8.6 as the final score. It's a great conclusion to Kratos' saga, but that still doesn't change my dislike towards Kratos. The games are pretty good, but I'm not fond of the way they kinda rape Greek Mythology... I'll be taking a break from GoW before I get into the Digital Download ports of the 2 PSP games. I won't buy Ascension, so I'll only review the 5 games from GoW Collection... Also, we finally got to fight

Well, Deadpool is the only foX movie WITHOUT Wolverine in it...

But Wolverine still manages to show up in that... so my last hope for an X-Men movie without the gulo gulo crutch has been shattered.




I wish they'd stop relying on Wolverine for EVERYTHING!!
Seriously, it's like they can't do an X-Men movie WITHOUT shoving him somehow... First Class was the closest thing to a Wolverine-less movie, but they HAD TO THROW IN THE WOLVERINE CAMEO IN IT...

But now that we have the crutch, I'll have to go to the theaters and see it... dammit!!

Apr 24, 2016

Time for me to DO Daredevil...

Oh, DareDevil... I never thought I'd give my thoughts on ye...

Oh, no! I'm not touching THAT Dare Devil... It has that annoying twat, Jennifer Garner, you know, the bitch that ruined Matt and Ben, the bossy chick who made Ben stop hanging out with Kevin Smith and Jason Mewes... something something, she's bossy... Also, I must try to not get hung up on Ben Affleck's failures, since he's now a Killer Batman and I don't want to close my eyes and Meet Armageddon and have a death by Gigli... So, Ben Aflac owes me one.

I'm talking about the OTHER Daredevil... The one where 20 minutes in he gives you this look...

He then begins to grope you because he's blind and can't see your reaction...

and I just made a REALLY Lame reference to Netflix and chill...

Luckily, the show's intro's got the perfect reaction to my lame attempt at humor... I don't have any children and my jokes are even lamer than dad jokes...

So, MCU's Daredevil...
It's not the Ben Affleck movie... also good riddance to any reference to Jen Garner!!

The attack on New York by the Not-Skrulls has damaged the city... a Bald Fat Dude is working from the shadows...
That dude, whose name is not revealed until mid season is played by this guy:

Yup! Vincent D'Onofrio is playing Marvel's Lard Lord of Larceny,  The Kingpin himself, Wilson Fisk... Would you look at that, a White guy who can play fat and bald... No offense to the late Michael Clarke Duncan, but Free Willy Fisk is supposed to be White!!
On the other side of the Spectrum we have Attorney Matthew Murdock, who is blind and I've seen somewhere before...

whose free time activities include wearing a disguise and beating up criminals.

So, a Lawyer by day, Vigilante by night... I want to make a reference to Sailor Moon, but I need to get serious. So, Matt tries to clean up Hell's Kitchen (PC people prefer West Midtown and Clinton...)
by using the Law and defending the little man (metaphorically speaking, not talking about people with dwarfism.) against powerful and corrupt fat cats. (Not literal fat cats...) something something Matt's Powers from the mysterious Ooze that fell on him gave him the ability to "see", and he can detect if someone is lying. While he believes in the system, it doesn't always work, hence his night-time activities.

I don't want to go and spoil everything in this review, but I will recommend you to watch it. There's 2 seasons on Netflix that you could watch in less than 2 weeks if you watch 2-4 episodes a day.
It's a bit darker than the MCU movies... (It deals with Kingpin, Punisher, The Hand, not exactly kid-friendly stuff. There are a few graphically violent moments... like Hard PG-13 to mild R moments.) If you needed another reason to have Netflix that is NOT Fuller House, Daredevil could work for ya!

Apr 23, 2016

Neitlich vs the New Team: The Boner List.

I am using Boner the same way the Joker used the term, goof up, mistake, that kind of thing... Not going to be counting erect penises... That's a job for someone else... Come on! Spike, roll the Count von Count clip... Spike? waht's wrong? Spike? SPIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIKE!!

Now Neitlich was 7 years into the brand, so he will have more mistakes than the new team. Remember that roughly 7 years vs 9 months. I shall use SDCC 2015 as the starting point for the New Team seeing there was where they threw Neitlich under the bus.

Neitlich Era Boners: Year 1 (2008-2009)

-King Grayskull: Brittle Plastic, Reversed Shoulders
-He-Man: Reversed Shoulders, maced face red paintjob overkill.
-Stratos: Glued on Wings, few had wrong colored Loincloth
-MerMan: Delayed, but Faker was used as an emergency measure replacement.
-Webstor: No Action Feature.
-Green Goddess: Brittle Plastic

6 figures with issues in year 1:
King Grayskull had a variant released with corrected shoulders and slightly better plastic.
He-Man had a reissue released in 2009 which fixed the issues.
Stratos had an in run change where they fixed the loincloth colors, but not the glued on wings.
Webstor no Solution was given.
Green Goddess: No solution was given.
while MerMan was delayed, Faker was a quick solution that had them deliver a figure that month and MerMan was simply moved one month back.


Year 2: (2010)
-Adora: Granny Panties
-BA He-Man: No Power Sword No Action Features
-She-Ra: Unable to ride steeds, Holey head.
-Tytus: too small
-Keldor: Wrong swords
-Roboto: Brittle Torso, Reversed Shoulders
-Grizzlor: No 200X Head
-Buzz-Off: No 200x Head
-Palace Guards: delayed to 2011, Neitlich head.
OK, so year two has more issues.

Granny Panties will be a common issue that Mattel seems unable to understand. Mostly because of the names given by the fans. The issue is that Mattel made skirts out of pieces that are supposed to wrap between the legs of female figures. (Like the bottom of a swimsuit.) If the character was wearing that clothing in the cartoon, a kick would flash off her vulva.
No Power Sword for BA He-Man was a Bummer Kinda solved with Castle Grayskull.
She-Ra was a Blunder that was kinda resolved with BP She-Ra, but it was a massive oversight. Like the Hole in the head.
The giants had no solution.
Keldor received Classicized 200X Swords via a Weapons pak.
Roboto had no solution
Grizzlor and Buzz off received their 200X heads via a sub exclusive.

So year 2 had 3 issues without a solution: Small Giant, which could be considered nit-picking. Granny Panties, which is a problem that went all the way to 2015. Past figures were screwed unless you customized them (trimming and gluing) yourself.
The TG Palace Guard head is not that huge an issue if you ignore the ♠Retconning♠ where Someone said that the Horsemen did that as a surprise. I could have sworn he ASKED to be made into a Palace Guard.
We also have water soluble glue holding the flocking on Mossman. I did not mention it earlier because the issue was more of his snarky reply to it than being an actual issue. (though those who like to take photoshoots in the wild may have an issue with Mossman's water weakness.)

Year 3:
-Reversed Shoulders on King Hsss and small snake torso.
-BA skeletor not having a Power Sword.
-Clawful's lack of 200X head.
-Megator was tiny.
-Cringer Undersized Statue
-Flaky Vac Metal on Hurricane Hordak
-Snout Spout's Rotting Trunk
-Some swift winds had wrong parts on their legs.
-Demo-Man was delayed.
-Mattel not understanding the point of wanting a 200X Evil Lyn and not Vintage Evil Lyn in 200X colors.

10 figures with issues.
Snout Spout and Clawful's issues were kinda solved with the 200X headpack. The Weapon Pak that gave us the 200X Swords for Keldor/Skeletor frees up a Vintage Purple Power Sword for BA Skeletor.
The 2016 Serpentine Hsss solves the Torso issue for the Vintage Hsss.
We lost Terry Higuchi as the lead in design. He was replaced by Ruben Martinez. Roughly 15-ish issues with design under Higuchi's helm.
Year 4: 2012

Before I start, I must issue a warning: While yeah, the 30th Anniversary roster should have been managed better and not been a Method for ♠ to self-promote and do some metaphorical analingus to Geoff Johns, this will not be an issue. I am looking at issues with the toys from a physical Point of view. (Lack of accessories, shoddy QC, that kind of thing) Now let's go!

-Sorceress: DEM WINGS!
-Fisto: MIA for various Subbers who received Sorceress Figures in Fisto Mailers.
-Shadow Weaver: Being Sub Exclusive was a dick move, but that's not the issue here. Many Subscribers DID NOT Receive their Shadow Weavers, due to the Sub cancellation glitch.
-Kobra Khan was delayed.
-Stinkor: Reversed Forearms
-Slushhead's dome peg.
-Horde Prime: Missing staff
-SMAA: Missing Handcannon
-Blastic on Vykron, Mekaneck, Rattlor, Snakemen 2pack, Spikor, and Sir-Loser-Lot.
-Frosta's grey and reversed forearms. (Mattel even offered a free figure as an apology)
-Dekker's Tunic without slits for Wider poses.
-EP Randor's Tunic without slits for Wider poses.
-Mosquitor: Gummy hands
-Procrustus too small.
-Draego-Man: Missing Accessories
-Spector: He Exists!! (j/k... I won't count it as an issue, but it still is an issue) missing Whip
-Cy-chop: Brittle Torso

Almost the entire year has had an issue here. The subscription cancelled glitch is a DR Incompetence issue. The Delays are a different set of issue. But let's look at the number of issues with the toys themselves that stem FROM DESIGN.
16. In ONE YEAR, Ruben Martinez managed to accumulate the number of issues that Higuchi had. I wish I knew about the internal politics at Mattel and WHY DIDN'T THEY GET RID of MARTINEZ sooner!!
Some issues were solved via weapon pak.
2013:
-Netossa Missing accessories (Sword and Faceguard)
-Jitsu Missing Accessory (200X Belt)
-Strobo Non GITD Paint on the Zodac Head.
-Octavia: Granny Panties
-Spirit of  Hordak existing (wasted slot)
-Rokkon and Stonedar: Ruben altered a few bits made by the horsemen to preserve accuracy to the characters (namely the legbands) Figures are clunky as hell.
-Shokoti: Granny Panties
-Nepthu: (He exists.) Chosen by Neitlich on a whim, when far more popular characters deserved a slot.
-Sea Hawk: Bloated Armor
-Geldor: Politics (Illumina won, but Neitlich picked Geldor due to the beef he had with Illumina's creator.)
-Plundor: See Nepthu.
-Castle Grayskull: Shrinkage, missing accessories, price increases.
-Standor: Metaphorical analingus, No accessories.

Netossa's sword was given to us via weapon pak.
Ninjor gave us Jitsu's belt in 2015
The rest well, weren't solved.
Here we see a bit more of Neitlich using his position to get who he wants. I've discussed Ad nauseum the whole Nepthu thing.
Bloated Armor shows it's ugly head and this is all Ruben. Remember that Higuchi Armors were more snug.

2014:
-Glimmer: granny Panties, no GITD staff, too tall.
-Hydron was a victim of Fat Armor Syndrome.
-Extendar's arms being too long, his Loincloth belt being beyond wrong.
-NA Skeletor Reversed Shoulders and Glued on Fat Armor.
-Rio Blast's Fat Armor that would not close unless you chopped a hole on it.
-Eldor's ill fitting Hood instead of a second hooded head (Supposedly, a Brandon Idea)
-Flimation Hordak not having a Robotic Head, or accurate armor. (Neitlich didn't learn from BaGEL)
-Double Trouble's head.

No solution to any of these issues here. Neitlich left in late 2014 with q1 of 2015 done under his instructions and part of q2.

2015:
-Ninjor's Bow and nunchucks
-Lack of Snake Form on King Hsss (was supposed to come with BS Hordak, but New team screwed up)
-Derp Eye on Angella
-Non removable armor on Blast Attack or ANY ATTEMPT TO SIMULATE his action feature.
That's the end of Boners under Neitlich:

Here's where the New Team begins to shine... Remember the whole throwing Neitlich under the bus, not releasing subpar items, etc.
-Rotar and Twistoid NOT offered in Early Access to Subscribers
-BS Hordak wasted HSSSS's tooling on a useless replica of Hordak's action feature
-Perfuma's Super heavy Flower.
-Fat Armor on FF He-Man.
-Laser Figures having bulky packs for super small batteries, Articulation and sculpt being compromised for Light up feature. Also ill fitting hood on Skeletor.
-Point Dread Teela's face. Lesser quality sculpted floor.

The only Item with solution was King Hssss's snake torso... and the solution was delayed twice!

2016:
-Masque: Delayed
-Vultak delayed until Late April or May depending on your sub type.
-King Hsss Delayed until March.
-Mattel admits that scalpers have been bypassing their security with bots.

That's ignoring the Filmation Sub-line with He-Man's horrible ankles.


Yes, if we compare Neitlich's entire run vs the new team, of course, he'll have more boners on his side. But if we go with the first 10 months of Neitlich vs the New team's current 10 month run, we can see that there were less boners on Neitlich's belt compared to the new team. In fact, most blunders come in the Ruben era of MOTUC. This speaks leagues of Ruben's incompetence as a Toy designer. While there are still some Neitlich boners (mostly out of his desire to kiss ass), Ruben was what did more damage to MOTUC making even Digital River seem tame in comparison.

Now the new team did release some subpar items in 2015... and they have done their best to fix those issues for 2016. With that said, we can't ignore that ALL MOTUC 2016 items have had some sort of issue causing a delay. In Neitlich's entire run there have been only 4 delays. Merman, Kobra Khan, Palace Guards, and Demo-Man. New Team caught up in less than a year.

What I'm trying to say is not #BringbackToyguru but, that the New Team is NOT Unicorns and Rainbows. They DID improve a few things that weren't as great in the Neitlich era, but they got worse in other areas. Transparency is borderline INVISIBILITY with Matty. People find out about most issues via random emails that some customers get than official announcements (on FB or their forums) In some cases answers must be pried out of them via Q&A sessions. Hell, my Blastic He-Man will reach me BEFORE Vultak does.

Apr 21, 2016

Odds and Ends 4/21/2016: No more Chyna, Rita Repulsa, and stuff

The controversial Chyna has passed away. Triple H's former girlfriend before he got in the boss's daughter's pants was a trailblazer in Wrestling, but her stint in porn (and mostly being Triple H's ex) kinda ruined her chances of becoming a Hall of Famer in life.

Now to more positive news, as in no one died for this one, EW has released the first pic of Elizabeth Banks as Rita... The odds were not in Rita's favor as the Pic will show.














See the issue: Rita does NOT Look Like Rita...
She kinda looks like Poison Ivy. Or that Elizabeth Banks had some nasty sex with Caesar... Dragon Caesar that is!
Yes, the new Reboot wants to RUB IT ON OUR FACES that Rita created the Green Ranger. No, movie, BAD!! I didn't expect them to recreate the entirety of Bandora's outfit. (The Japanese Space Witch who was dubbed as Rita in MMPR) They need some more RITA-esque elements on her. She looks like a redesigned Scorpina or Poison Ivy than Rita. Not a fan of this look. It's supposed to be Repulsa not Faptastic... Insert a Wand make my Monster Grow joke here...

Khaleesi, Queen of Mereen no longer Sarah Connor. If this stops the Terminator Movies, then good!
Retconning T2... stupid dumb fu...

Back to dead people once again...
has passed away. I remember my mom listening to Purple Rain while she did chores around the house... I was often playing with my Vintage MOTU toys or hot wheels...

Is it wrong that the first thing that came to my mind was this?





I know, it's a bit messed up... HOLY CRAP! Ed Boon you genius! NOW I TOTALLY GET IT... Purple Ninja, named Rain... Purple Rain! I feel like a dummy...

Apr 20, 2016

DBZXV is the Closest thing to Mighty Spector: The game.

Dragon Ball Xenoverse for PS4 was a belated B-Day Present. Last game I played was Budokai 3...
Let's get to the rating so I can more or less explain the game.

Story:
Y'all know how Trunks went back in time and messed up the timeline with the androids and stuff, right. Well, his actions apparently pissed off the Supreme Kai of Time and she made him a Time Patroller. So, Trunks now corrects mistakes in the timeline... Except during the Z Period (and GT if you get the DLC) That is left to your Created Character FROM THE FUTURE!! You can make an Earthling, a Sayiajin, a Namekuseijin, a being From Furiza's species, or a Majin.
(Voice Male 8 is similar to DBZAbridged Nappa. But that's because they used the DBZA VA for Nappa... Kyle Hebert and Chris Sabat must have pulled some strings.)

So, basically you're the DBZ Spector and you're correcting the Timeline for the Supreme Kai of Time and Trunks (which would be the Equivalents of He-Man and Teela). There's this chick, Dabura's Sister and some other dude who are messing with the timeline to bring back the demon god, Demigra.
Trunks basically wishes for you and now you get to mess with the timeline to somewhat fix it...
9.0

Graphics:
We've seen the last few DBZ games do the same thing Cell shading to make them look as close to the cartoon as possible, while using polygonal figures instead of 2D art.
8.5

Controls:
Frustrating as Hell. There's 2 Attack buttons, 1 Ki Button, 1 Block Button, 1 Dodge/fly high button, lock on button, dash triggerand special move menu trigger. In addition click the L3 Button to descend.

The 3 Attack buttons work fine. Dashing works fine too... Dodge relies on your stamina, but it works... Blocking on the other hand... you need to know when an attack is coming 3 moves before it comes so you can block effectively. When you DO block an attack, the AI does an unblockable throw. That is nothing compared to the iffy targeting system. You lock on to an opponent to attack, but if they dodge an attack by the teleporting behind you, the lock-on acts a bit off. It still thinks the enemy is in front of you until YOU turn around manually to the opponent. you need to stand still then move the movement stick towards the enemy in order to attack him. otherwise you'll keep attacking the previous direction, even after standing still. Then we have Vertical issues. Most of the fights happen in mid-air. An attack sends the opponent down, you must slowly descend to reach him by pressing the L3 Down. You could dash but it's not always reliable.
6.5

Gameplay:

Half the time is spent on the Tokitoki hub "world" here you can chat with other online players if you're into the online thing. you can be "trained" by other characters like Krillin, or Ginyu. You can get missions, from the Parallel quest desk, or other characters. You can buy items at the shops and enter the Local or Online VS mode... Seriously, who hides the Offline VS. Mode on a single player Hub World and not put it in the start menu!?

The meat of the game is either on the parallel quest desk or the Time Vault. There is where most of the story missions start.

From there we get to the fighting... It's trying to be a DBZ game and God of War minus QTEs at the same time and it kinda fails, due to the issues with the controls and the AI often getting infinite Ki and Stamina boosts due to interference from Towa and Mira. In some cases, you'll find yourself overpowered... So, Grinding it is... Until you reach the point that you need to WIN 4-5 extra hard parallel quests just to raise one level... only to find out that you need 5 more levels to barely scrape by...
4.5

Sounds and Music:

We get an OK rendition of Cha La Head Chala in the intro. We have the DBZ cast reprising their roles and we have DBZ music in the game... This might be the best part of the game. In addition to having an Abridged VA in the game.
9.5

Overall:
Xenoverse gets a 7.6 as its final score. Unless you're SUPER SAIYAJIN 3 Hardcore DBZ fan, you should avoid this game.

Damn! The cast of Everybody loves Raymond just shrank a bit...

First we lost Peter Boyle, then we lost Sawyer Sweeten who played Geoffrey Barone (one of the twins), now we have lost Marie... To be fair, Doris Roberts was 90 at the time of her passing.

I think she was Grandma Tanner in Full House as well...
May she rest in peace...

She also was the reason I started watching Remington Steele, as well as Pierce Brosnan... I still need to see if mom had the full series on DVD...



Guess I know what I'll binge watch once I finish S2 of DareDevil and S1. of Jessica Jones.

Apr 16, 2016

God of War Collection: Part II: God of War II

Part II of the God of War Collection review series will be tackling, uh God of War II. My opinion on GoW changed from actual Hatred to I find the game enjoyable. Now I shall tackle the Sequel.

Kratos is pissed off again! Man he gets his panties in a bunch more than a third waver! Zing!


Story:
Kratos lost his Godly Powers by a ruse by Zeus who no longer needs scissors, 61! He's Captain Hook in Kingdom Hearts now. (or 2011 Jaga) and Kratos is pissed off at Zeus. Now he will try to pull off a Cher.  Along the way you meet various popular characters from Greek Mythology and kill them, cause: Rawr! Grr! I AM CRATE ASS!! I WANT REVENGE!!! RAWR!!
6.0

Music and sounds:

The Music follows the same feel as the first game. Voice Acting is great, some voice actors were replaced, and some new ones show up... Prometheus VA shocked me... Theseus is now Uncle Ben's Grandpa... REALLY? They have Paul Eiding in the game and they didn't ask him to reprise his role as Zeus? WTF!? But what REALLY ENRAGED ME is that I had to Kill the Perseus that led to my conception. That enraged me more than the offensive remake of Clash of the Titans. and I mean I was feeling the male equivalent to Third Waver Rage.
9.5

Graphics:
Like its predecessor, this is a PS2 Game ported to PS3, so what I stated on GoW I, still stands here. 7.0 for a PS2 Game.

Controls:
Things changed slightly this time, but in some cases (opening gates) it's better to smash the circle than smashing a trigger button. 9.0

Gameplay:
Did you play the Original God of War? If the answer is yes, then you know what to expect of this game. same platforming hack&slash action, but you get to kill different characters than the first game. I know I sound a bit dismissive here, but if you enjoyed the first GoW, then you will enjoy GoWII. 8.5

Overall:
GoW II gets an 8.0, which is a reasonable score. I must say, although I despise having to kill My Perseus, a lot more than the awful remake (TBH, they should have fires Sam Worthless' ass after he refused to work with Bubo. also, what's with Perseus being the only one with a fade?) the idea of getting Harry Hamlin as Perseus was awesome.

Ooh Matty!! You're in deep Nepthu right now...

Yesterday, Filmation Trap Jaw went on sale and he sold out in 3-5 minutes... Well, people are Pissed off. first Anti-Eternia He-Man sold out in a Barry Allen, now Trap Jaw sells out in a Wally West.
Also, people are pissed off that turpentine King Hssss is now $25.

I'll tackle the Hsss thing first. His $20 price tag was not stated to be something permanent and it was only through the special page made for 2015 subscribers last month... Now this doesn't stop it from being shady and a dick move. If they had been TRANSPARENT about it, they would have stated this in a way that we were made aware of the issue something like: The $20 price tag is exclusive to 2015 subscribers. Once we make him available to everyone else he'll have the $25 price tag.

Now the whole Items being Sold out in a Jay Garrick...

This is your defense, Matteh? Scalpers use scripted bots to bypass your system and screw us over?

Yeah... I can understand using the bot to autofill everything... but how can it bypass a captcha?

Apparently, they can. So, Matteh is covering their tracks there... passing the blame unto the scalpers.

If you see an Anti-Eternia He-Man or Filmation Trap Jaw going for over $100 in these days, DO NOT BUY IT!!
Let's face it... This will be used by Matteh... This July. Wanna beat the Scalpers? Buy the sub!

This whole Artificial Rarity thing that Mattel is trying to promote is what led us to the 2013 drop-off. These figures SHOULD BE AVAILABLE FOR EVERYONE TO BUY. The sub is not the solution. that only feeds the Scalpers. Seriously, 8 years into this line and Mattel knows LESS than Jon Snow...(At least he knows how to please a wildling)

Collectors are King, my ass! What measures are they taking to prevent the scalpers? They must have known for a while that this was happening. Their silence Explains it all... No reference to Clarissa. Now I have to play the clip, dammit!


Also, in the words of Scott D. Neitlich: Buy the Sub!


Apr 15, 2016

Anti-Eternia-He-Man Chaos!

Anti-Eternia He-Man was made available via Early Access yesterday. Apparently I may have bought the last one or one of the last ones available. It went out in 3 minutes... Holy dated references, Batman!! I had to endure 75 seconds of Coming Soon after sale date started. It wouldn't let me add 2, so I bought one. Tried to go for the second one, because I wanted to keep one MOC. (I don't keep stuff MOC, but the red card is too cool to pass up)

3 figure limit per order and they managed to sell them all in 3 minutes!?
This would be the part where I'd add a Ricky Ricardo Clip, but Youtube ran out of those.

What the HELL!? Matty! I thought that this Bull Crap was done for when Neitlich left! You guys have been WORSE Than Neitlich! Masque was Delayed, Turpentine King Hiss was delayed twice! Vultak? Where the Hell is MY VULTAK, MATTY!? Now this? So far every MOTUC Offering in 2016 has had some sort of issue... We're on Mid-April now. In 3 Months, the Sub-a-thon will start anew. This kind of Horse pucky will make it even harder to sell subs... DO you want to fail? Because all you're doing right now is making Neitlich look good. After all the throwing him under the bus that you did, is obvious that y'all disliked him, but your bumbling incompetence is making people reconsider the notion that Neitlich was all that was wrong with Matty.

Despite YOUR INCOMPETENCE, I want MOTUC to succeed. Stop making it so hard, Matty! I want to give you my money for your products... Why do you make it so difficult?

Apr 13, 2016

God of War collection... Part I: The Original God of War.

I'm not a fan of God of War... Or should I say I HATED God of War. Well, as you know, I bought a couple of games when Gamestop was running away from PR. I ended up getting the God of War Collection. The first 3 GoWs and digital copies of the 2 PSP games for PS3 for under $20, so there is some value there 5 games under $20... This will be the first of a Multi-Part series but unlike 'Nita, I'm not asking for Victimbucks... (also, I may not take 4 years to complete it.)

I'm still waiting for the Patriarchy to give me some privilege money... I'm considered Latino to them... DAMN!

Story:
So, God of War: You're Crate Ass Kratos, a Mighty Spartan, who serves Ares... or should I say SERVED, since Kratos is pissed at Ares for tricking him into killing his family (that's why he looks so ashen... his wife and daughter's ashes are bonded to his skin.) He wants revenge and his goal is to kill the God of War.
Here I have to say that the game gets a 5.0 out of 10... I love the whole Greek Mythology aspect, but at the same time, the premise of Kratos killing a Greek god... doesn't really sit well with me... Especially when the last cool Ares died too soon.
 Music and sounds:
The music is really cool. It has this Epic feel to it and it blends well into the background...

The voice acting is pretty decent.
We have Steve Blum as Ares, TC Carson as Kratos... Zeus... well... you've heard some of these VAs before and they do a great job!
9.5

Graphics:
To be fair, God of War is a PS2 Game and it shows. I mean for a PS2 Game the graphics are OK... not Square-EA  to  Square Enix or a Hideo Kojima game graphics, but for a PS2 Game they were serviceable. ON PS3, well, you can easily see that it's a PS2 game Ported to PS3. This is more noticeable on the cutscenes. 7.0 after taking in consideration that the game is a port of a PS2 game.

Controls:
They are responsive and rather easy to get a hang of.  9.5

Gameplay:
3D Hack and slash with puzzles and Platforming. I HATED YOU the first time I played you in 2006, but 10 years later after playing DMC (must give this series a second chance), Bayonetta, because screw you 'nita!, The Raidenovich copy... REVENGEANCE!!! and Castlevania: a Hideo Kojima Game. got me more used to the GoW style...

I'm putting this here because GoW started the practice of ANNOYING QTEs in mid battle...
So, yeah, I must mention fixed camera angles, which can annoy some people and cause them to accidentally roll. Puzzles can be unforgiving, especially the spike roller climb. Died many times because of some bull collision  detection.
8.5

Overall:
God of War gets a 7.9 as its final score. I'm actually surprised, seeing that I HATED, HATED, HATED this game with a passion... I still don't like Kratos as a character that much, but he is so damn fun to play as... until I have to do a freaking QTE to kill an enemy.

My Little Tabletop RPG and David Bowie's crotch return!

Wahaha! We are getting a My Little Pony themed Tabletop RPG... You know, like Dungeons and Dragons... with Ponies!



Yes, Spikey Wikey, we can...
Labyrinth the board game is being made by the same people making the MLP D&D styled game...



They also have Hunger Games: The Game and Terminator Genisys, but Freaking Labyrinth... My brain is temporarily out of service...

Apr 11, 2016

First Person Videogame: The movie: The Rant

I am talking about Hardcore Henry. Basically an action movie shot in First Person View.


I am conflicted with this movie. I liked it, but I did not LOVE it. The gimmick is cool and all, BUT the plot is paper thin and the characters, well, you don't get to care about the characters, since they lack character. The closest thing to a fully developed character is Jimmy, played by Sharlto Copley.

It's an experience, but I must warn you, it can be a bit dizzying at times if you're not used to marathonic sessions of Call of Duty or any other Modern FPS game. It's basically something like a longer version of this:



The story is this: You are a cyborg, rebuilt by your wife and the lab gets attacked by terrorists and their superpowered leader. They kidnap your wife and you will have to rescue her. If you noticed something, I refer to Henry as you, since WE are watching the story unfold through Henry's Perspective. There's a small plot twist that I won't reveal, but that's about it.

Should you see it? Yes, if you like those FPV SIMULATOR Rides, without the moving seats.
It's not great but it'll keep you entertained for 90-something minutes.

Apr 10, 2016

Odds and ends April 10, 2016

Jake Lloyd, the only person who can actually say: George Lucas ruined my childhood, literally; was arrested after a Police Chase. Well, apparently, he was moved to a hospital, due to schizophrenia. This is the part where I'm torn right now, because this whole situation leads itself to a Death Star sized bunch of Star Wars jokes that could be made. The other part is like: damn, we should cut him some slack, seeing that mental issues are a serious thing.

I hope he can recover and live a normal life, well as normal as life can be knowing that "you ruined Darth Vader long before Hayden Christensen did."
Like you didn't think that... Search your feelings, you know it to be true!
Let me get one last Annie Skywalker reference out of my system... I don;t want to use Jingle all the way.


OK, as I was saying, my wishing for a recovery on Mr. Lloyd's part is not a joke. He has a long road ahead of him and now a bigger struggle, that I wish he can overcome.


Spider-Man, Spider-Man, bringing MCU Characters, Spider-Man! So, we'll see some Avengers on the Spidey-Reboot by SONY... as part of the deal of having Spidey in the MCU. This is not really news, except that we have a bit of Related news on the Article Linked. Cloak and Dagger are getting their own TV series... So, how can I make this relevant...
Let's see: Agents of SHIELD has Deathlok, Disney has Captain America as well as now Cloak and Dagger. They have access to Spidey and his characters (Venom, Black Cat, wonder if they can do Morbius, or Firestar...)

Maximum Carnage can become a Reality now!!

Apr 9, 2016

I knew Gawker was going to try to weasel out, brother!

The asshats at Gawker are trying to weasel out of paying the massive damages that they were ordered to pay to the Hulkster. Their strategy? A retrial, or to have the damages be drastically reduced. The douche canoes are claiming this:

"Gawker is now beginning the process of challenging the jury's verdict in a trial where key evidence was wrongly withheld and the jury was not properly instructed on the Constitutional standards for newsworthiness, So we expect to be fully vindicated. And even if the verdict were to stand, there is no justification for awarding tens of millions of dollars never seen by victims of death and serious injuries."
First let's go over the statements by Gawker's Most Successful editor (or former, since he had left Gawker in 2013) and the one who published the sex tape AJ Daulerio

Remember that whole Daulerio is OK with publishing child pornography as long as the child is over four years old for the sake of "newsworthiness"thing...

(It's long and hard to look at, but it's supposedly, the raw court footage.)
THAT is why people took it hard on Gawker. Their people are so snarky and dickish to make jokes about child pornography being newsworthy enough to be published made the jury side with the Adulterer, Terry Bollea. The Jury saw fit to Punish Gawker where it hurts the most, money. They agreed that Gawker pretty much killed what was left of Hulk Hogan's career, to the point that WWE gave Hogan the Benoit Treatment. That's why they ARE USING THEIR POWER TO PUNISH Gawker. It's that simple.
Gawker, you dun goofed!

Apr 8, 2016

Flinging Popcorn at KoF...

KoF: SNK's answer to Street Fighter... right after Fatal Fury and Art of Fighting...
Y'all see what's wrong right out of the bat.

Main Character is MAI SHIRANUI...
Darth Maul is Rugal
White Boy who looks like a Twilight Reject is KYO KUSANAGI

No offense to Maggie Q, but she is NOT Mai Shiranui... She lacks the proper Chesticles to play mai... Hell, she doesn't even dress like MAI in the movie.

But at least she's part Asian... Not like Honkyo Crakernagi, who seriously looks more Sparkly than Edward Cullen... and I should know since I've cosplayed as Edward before.

But that's just the title pic... Let's see How much FAIL this movie has...

First about 1 minute of logos and telling you who made this... (not actor credits, but companies who were involved.) Then we are teased with a Mai shower scene, her Bluetooth shows the KoF Logo and we see her fight a dude in a pimp suit who uses sticks. who I thought was a weird Billy Kane... not him... It's a Mr. Big ersatz... So she wins and we're brought back to the shower. She then gets ready for a date with...
Before you mention Andy Bogard, he's NOWHERE IN THIS ABOMINATION... Mai is dating
Iori Yagami... Not even five minutes into the movie and they have messed up big time... This is Beyond SF 94 bad... This is making DB:Evolution LOOK GOOD... So, Mai and Iori go on a date to a museum exhibit held by Chizuru Kagura... Hear this out:
KoF is a Tournament held in ANOTHER DIMENSION AND THEY USE THE BLUETOOTH DEVICES TO GO AND FIGHT PEOPLE!

There's a Necklace, a Mirror, and a Sword that allow you to go to the otherworld, but we must be careful of Orochi who wants to something something evil.

Toad from X-Men shows up, steals 2 out of 3 artifacts and corrupts KoF.

Something something Terry Bogard is a CIA Agent. I think he's trying to stop KoF, but if it's a secret Tournament held in ANOTHER DIMENSION, what's the deal with Mai being a CIA Agent sent by Terry to infiltrate KOF? The world may never know.  Rugal corrupts fighters, plays street hockey and tries to make out with lesbians.
So Mai tries to get Saisyu Kusanagi to deliver the sword, but he's in a coma-like state. There we meet Honkyo Crakernagi. Something something Iori's presence kills Saisyu. Honkyo is all Darkness, no Parents, Angst because he's  The Chosen One, but doesn't feel like it. Eventually everyone enters KoF land and try to stop Rugal.
CIA Agent becomes horrible Terry Bogard Cosplayer when he enters KoF World...
At least they TRIED to have SOME characters kinda dress like their game counterparts.

That doesn't save the movie from being a MASSIVE TURD!!
Kyo fights Rugal and wins... but movie is crap anyway... If you want to lose 1:40 of your time, this turd is on Netflix...

Apr 7, 2016

I have lost faith in Humanity...

Why did people fund 'Nita's latest scam? Seriously? $200,000 for her to play dress up (and appropriate other people's cultures... I thought this was a big no-no in sock Juice land...)
YES, I mad, SIS!!
You screwed over a campaign that was intended to do REAL FEMINIST WORK, as in HELPING ACTUAL WOMEN IN THE THIRD WORLD, and said that it was harassment... Meanwhile you were begging for donations in order to pay for your playing dress up...

Does anyone see the issue here?
One is asking for $200,000 to read Wikipedia entries of 5 women while playing dress up. The other is asking for $200,000 for well, let me quote the reason here:

BENEFITING: International Women's Health Coalition
THE STORY:
Hello, I'm TJ Kirk. I hope that you will join me in supporting The International Women's Health Coalition, whose goals are to provide sexual education, reproductive rights, and educational opportunities women and girls in places like Africa, India, The Middle East and Asia. They strive to help girls in these regions by:

-Advancing the rights of adolescent girls
-Promoting comprehensive sexual education
-Ending child marriages and forced marriages
-Ensuring safe and legal abortions

The IWHC accomplishes these goals by working with governments and global health policymakers as well as funding educational programs and grassroots political movements. They are bringing true feminism to woman and girls who suffer actual oppression and inequality. Their organization has received a 4 star rating from Charity Navigator, a service that rates charities based on the financial health of the charity and the transparency and accountability of the charity. The IWHC received a rating of 90 out of 100 for financial health and 100 out of 100 for transparency and accountability. To learn more about the IWHC you can check out their website here: https://iwhc.org
 I may not necessarily agree with ALL the things that the money will do, I KNOW THIS MONEY WILL DO MORE GOOD than having a privileged girl play dress up in San Francisco. How dare I say she's privileged? Have you gone to the  Colbert Report? Have you been to the UN and given a speech about being "harassed"? Do you rub elbows with Joss Whedon, Paul Feig, and Hwil Hweaton kissing your ass so much that he can taste what you ate while you're swallowing your first bite?
The answer is most likely no... well, she does. That is being privileged as Hell!

Seriously, her campaign HELPS NO ONE BUT HERSELF... The campaign by TJ Kirk (whether you like him or hate him) is far more Altruistic than hers... She got the $200K+... TJ's  barely passed the $100K. See what's wrong here?
She's definitely got a cult... and right now I wonder who is more despicable... She for asking for the money, or the fools who are falling for her Snake Oil saleswoman charms. Humanity, you have failed...
*sigh* The only good thing I can say about this is that with 6 hours till the end she only got $408 dollars over her amount, and that she barely made it. Her Tropes v.Women scam was a fluke. Yes I am calling it a scam, because she did NOT finish Tropes v.Women in videogames AND she is half-assing her already half-assed work and is doing smaller scaled videos that so far can be explained as: 'Nita doesn't understand Biology.  So, I guess she'll take about 3 years to do this series...

Update:
She only ended with 7,058 over her planned $200,000... but still, people paid 1/5 of a Million dollars to see her play dress up and read Wiki entries... That's messed up

Apr 6, 2016

It Came From the Toy chest: Deathstroke gets practice on the Deadpool

Slade Wilson, enemy of Bruce, Dick and Ollie... depending on what show/game you are watching... Deathstroke the Terminator... DC's proto-Deadpool minus 4th wall breaking insanity. This one is the Ollie Hating variety. This is the Villain I chose to get for my Oliver Queen. They had Merlyn, but I chose Deathstroke... They also had a buttload of Felicity Smoaks, but since I've slowly become an Olicity hater (and the fact that Felicity could lend herself to make a 'Nita custom) have made me avoid Ms. Smoak like the Bubonic plague.

So, let's take a look at Mr. Wilson!

Articulation:
He can pull off a seiza!
He Has a lot! Ball joint head, shoulders, elbows, hinged wrists hips ankles, double jointed knees and a swiveling torso. It all sounds great on paper, but his articulation is stiff as heck! Shoulders, hips and head to an extent are incredibly limited, which make a lot of his articulation useless...
2.5

Paint and Sculpt:
Delicious details!!
Here is where Slade shines! The Scupt is amazing with plenty of details, bandolier, pouches, buckles webgear, protective padding there's always something new to notice on Slade... The problem is that all these things have the issue of paint errors, especially on the belt buckles, rivets, etc.
I kinda fixed the knife
but it's fragile as heck!
Low shelf for this guy.
maybe blutac his feet.
4.0

Accessories:
He has plenty, but can he use them? Not so much. His left hand can theoretically hold his Katana. After accidentally bending to the point of nearly breaking the small knife on his back when trying to put it in his left hand, I've not tried putting anything else there. Warning, his blades are made of thin kinda brittle plastic, so they are prone to breaking.
3.0

Overall:
Slade gets a 3.17 as his Final Score. He could have gotten a better score had his articulation worked properly and his accessories weren't so brittle.

Fuller House a Review not involving Jodie Sweetin's twins!

Yes, let's get Stephanie Tanner's Mega Mammaries out of the way... Dayum! Stephanie Grew up!

Come on! Like you didn't expect a set up to use a "How Rude!" Compilation...

I know I should, but I just can't... Hey! At least I didn't pull out Mr. Woodchuck! NO CLIPS!!

So, Fuller Blouse House! It's basically a genderbent sequel/reboot of Full House. DJ Tanner is playing the role of Danny by being a Widow with 3 kids. Stephanie is playing Jessie (her boobs are the Rippers! Last one, I swear!) But Stephanie is a DJand goes by the name DJ Tanner... Kimmy is Joey... I guess this makes her daughter Ramona Mr. Woodchuck! They all end up living in an incredibly accurate reproduction of Danny Tanner's house. Seriously, the Set designers did a marvelous job of recreating the familiar space. Hell, even Comet's great grandpup is the new Fuller dog.

Now what you're going to be asking me is: IS IT ANY GOOD!? The critics have Blasted it and said that it was crap! My answer is: Do you like Full House? Do you mind a few references to Stephanie's Massive Melons? (and one or two jokes not intended for kids?) If you answered: Yes, God, No! (and definitely no!) then you will enjoy Fuller House.

The show has a few issues: Mostly stem from it being "edgy" Full House. The rest are due to the child actors being, well, children.

Some of the situations seem a bit Ridiculous, EVEN FOR FULL HOUSE, but they happened... Certain Cast Member being a Mexican Wrestler... No, it's not Kimmy. My brain exploded twice. Or when Stephanie, basically humiliated her nephew at Coachella... well, would've humiliated him if this was real life.

The child actors are the weaker area here. Now to be fair, acting is not easy, especially at that young age. Max Fuller, the new Stephanie is a bit hammy in his performance. Hopefully he'll get better as he grows.

Should you watch Fuller House? Hell yeah! Then form your own opinions about it... Unless you're diabetic. It's as saccharine as the original show. But it can get pretty dark... yes I'm talking about THAT Scene... My eyes got watery, to be honest. If it wasn't for the chocolate sundae I was eating, I would've bawled my eyes out.


Sorry, don't call me... maybe? this version is inferior to the original. Had to get that out of my system.

Also, the Olsen twins are bitches! I'm sorry, their "Excuse" for not doing a cameo for the show is pure BS. The Tuomy-Wilholt twins came back for a cameo. Few lines... "I'm off to New York to be an intern for Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen!" and disappear like Judy Winslow. But noooo! Their Oversized egos MUCH BIGGER than Stephanie's boobs! (Sorry! This one is the last reference) But at least the jabs at the Olsens have been pretty funny! At least THIS SHOW treats the Olsens with much more respect than Suck Snyder treated Jimmy in BvS:We need to get some of that Avengers money!

Apr 5, 2016

It Came from the Toy Chest: GET USED TO IT!!

Ah, John Boyega, who plays Finn in Star Wars... Cool guy! Visiting sick kids as Finn and staying in character... but he's the final Star Wars: the force Awakens character for me to review... blame the ugly derp-eyed Poe Damerons...
 Seriously!!
LOOK AT POE! Then look at the Toy! It LOOKS NOTHING LIKE OSCAR ISAAC!!
This is not the Pilot Finn fell in love with... if we believe Tumblr...

So, Finn, he's the Traitor Stormtrooper that joins the Resistance against Teh First Order... blah blah blah... Get the movie, Available now. No, I'm not being paid to promote it.

Articulation:
 The Pic speaks for itself! Finn is decently Articulated, almost like a Marvel Legend...
To be fair he could lend himself for customs as well.
4.5

Paint and Sculpt:
The sculpt is pretty decent and while it's not 100% accurate to John Boyega, the sculpt captures his look from some angles. Paint, well I do have a slight issue with the paint on him. the base of his pants looks like either faded jeans or the shoe paint is creeping up his pants. all 5 Finns available had this to different degrees.
Don't be surprised if Tumblr nominates John Boyega as the
next Bond. Wait... That's a real thing!? I was joking!
4.5

Accessories:
 Finn only has the Blaster as his accessory.
2.0
Overall:
Finn gets a 3.67 as his final score... I kinda wish he had come with the misdirectional item, to be honest...
He's a decent figure, but feels somewhat lacking...I'm worried about the Stormtrooper version overshadowing this figure...

This is here to piss off 'Nita!

It Came from the Toy chest: Here's Rey!

OK, so I finally found Rey... I've owned one since late January, like Kylo Ren. It's just that with the move, I got side-tracked and I was looking for a non-derp-eyed Poe Dameron... It hasn't happened. So, Finn and Rey have been sitting in a box in the closet, while I took care of other stuff. I frantically looked for them because of the coming of the BluRay and DVD version of The Force Awakens. Now I found out about the KMart Exclusive Rey with Lightsaber.

So, who is Rey: She's a Mary Sue who is now the new Luke Skywalker.

Articulation:
I'll let the pic do the talking.
 But I must mention she also has a thigh cut that I discovered long after writing this review, but just before publishing it.
The waist, I've been told it's supposed to be a ball joint, but mine is stuck pretty hard and I don't want to risk breaking Rey.
4.5




Paint and sculpt:
There are no cloth items here. EVERYTHING IS SCULPTED on Rey. The paintjob is hit or miss on the figures. I got the best out of 3 Reys that were available. One was derp eyed, the second had dark brown (like the belts) paint splotches on her tunic in the crotch area and looked like dried period blood. The one I got has her ears not fully painted but it's not noticeable from the front. My biggest issue is that I don't See the likeness to Daisy Ridley in her sculpt.
3.5

Accessories:
An Articulated BB-8 and her staff.
I must complain about the staff. Her strap is made of rigid plastic and cannot be slung over Rey's shoulder.
BB-8 on the other hand is pretty cool. The weighted bottom keeps the little droid mostly in balance. (I'd add a little blutac to the bottom to keep the droid from rolling out.) BB-8's head is on a barbell peg, giving it the ball-joint-like movement.
3.5

Overall:
Rey gets a 3.67 as her final score. It's a shame that her staff is stuck with a rigid staff.

It's a shame because the staff having the ability to be put on Rey's back would have made it more versatile and made her score higher. Right now it looks horrible and cumbersome to use. On the other hand, BB-8 is amazeballs!

BTW It was a worse trap than we expected... Yesterday, we found out that Erik Bauersfeld has passed away. Why am I sneaking this bit of news in a Star Wars toy review? Because he is well known for something something Star Wars.

Apr 4, 2016

Reginald Vel Johnson on girl Meets World?

I hope he's not playing a cop there... Aw dammit! According to CinemaBlend he is playing a cop...

Why is Reginald Vel Johnson the go to guy when they need a cop? Then again Urkel is THE Sanic!

We need Urkel in Girl Meets World... No, I don't mean Jaleel White. I mean... Wait Scratch that! We need URKEL IN FULLER HOUSE!!
He WAS IN FULL HOUSE... (and in Step by Step... Damn! For an unpopular kid, Urkel was really popular!)
All jokes aside, if they are bringing other people from other TGIF shows... How long until Melissa Joan Hart shows up?

Apr 2, 2016

It Came from the Toy Chest: Caw Parts are not meant for MOTUC... or are they?

Remember the WWE Create a Superstar? This... made me... RANT... about... Mattel... Making... Create a... MOTU... Figure! (Yes, I went with a Just Bring it! Reference or 2) Well, Mattel has made "weapon paks" for the CaW sub-line... (I know it's CaS, but the common nickname for Create a Superstar is Create a Wrestler. Tony Hawk had Create a Skater, so you can see why CAW stuck to the WWE game Create a Superstar better. google WWE CaW in images and you'll see what I mean.)
OK, so you're back! The Knight Set... Why is it called a Knight Set? I mean, That's a Centurion Helmet, Roman Armor, the mask that in no way was inspired by a movie starring Russell Crowe... 


Well, I got a pair of these. I have to be honest, the main reason was the Torch.
 I mean TWO TORCHES!!! Mattel would be stupid if they don't find a way to release a bunch of these for MOTUC... or Brand new Torches. Seriously, torches can help create an ambiance. Picture The interior of Snake Mountain, the lower level and having a Masters character, say Beastman escorting Trap Jaw and a Captive Man-at-Arms to the dungeon in the lower level. Having Beastman carrying the torch would help sell the idea that Snake Mountain is a dark and creepy place... Even if in Real life it's a hunk of purple plastic.

The Torch alone makes this $5.99 set worth getting. The other items are an added bonus.

As you can see The Armor looks nice on a Masters of the Universe Classics Body...

That is as long as you're looking at it from the Front.
If you look at it from the side, you can see it's not a great fit. Luckily the straps allow it to be in place and look rather nice. The Armor is better suited for smaller 6" bodies like some DCUC figures without capes, or clip-on pieces on the back. Then again, you could repaint a torso to the same color of the Armor and hide the gaps a bit.

Next item to discuss is the Shield.
The hand grip is a bit wide... NA Sword Wide, so it's not suited for EVERY FIGURE... I may sand the handle a little bit so more figures can use it.

Size is perfect for a MOTUC figure











The final two Items are the headpiece items. They will NOT fit most MOTUC Figures. (Once I locate my Spector, I'll test them on his head and update this if necessary.)

I tried them on John Matrix and the Gladiator mask fits perfectly. The Helmet is a bit small.
The Helmet fits Hal Jordan Perfectly. The Mask... Well, you can see the pic.

The more I look at the Gladiator mask, the more tempted I am to cut off the Upper strap and use it as a shoulderpad like on the Sideshow Statue.


I said, like the Sideshow Statue...

SPIKE!?

Where's the freaking Sideshow Statue pic!?

Finally!

So, how can I rate this set? It's 5 Items for $6.
They are NOT MEANT FOR MOTUC and they DON'T MAKE SENSE FOR WWE either... Gladiator Triple H, Cyborg John Cena, Weird Snake Themed Super villain Randy Orton? Mr. America for a non-existing wrestler who laid the Smackdown! on Gawker is the only one that makes sense.
I know that $6 may be overpriced for a Torch, but the rest of the items could work as props for Castle Grayskull's weapon Rack. Of course some would need some paint touch ups, but it's not that difficult! Get it, you'll enjoy it!








Apr 1, 2016

Ohai James Franco! Ohai! Tommy Wiseau!

You're tearing me apart, James Franco! Tommy Wiseau is contractually obligated to film a cameo for The Disaster Artist and you say that it may not even make it? Duuude! You got TOMMY WISEAU ON FILM... EVERYTHING HE DOES IS INCREDIBLY AKWARD (and Fun)

I just wish we could have like 30 minutes of Franco mimicking Wiseau... But the Cameo will be OK for me... Seriously, right after Civil War and Batffleck v. The Killer that no one cares about, The Disaster Artist is the movie I WANNA SEE!!

Who Are the Mythbusters?

Spike, Roll the clip!!

It's rather obvious... The Mythbusters are Adam Savage and Jamie Hyneman.
Between them over 30 years of experience... right!?

Then WHY IN THE BLUE HELL IS DISCOVERY... I MEAN THE SCIENCE CHANNEL MAKING A REALITY SHOW TO FIND OUT WHO WILL BE THE NEW MYTHBUSTERS!?

"So we looked really closely at what would be the best way to keep it going and invigorate it and thought, 'Let's host a worldwide search for the next MythBusters.'"
 The show will have contestants doing mythbusting... This is starting to sound less like Mythbusters and more like


Yeah... You see what's going on here, right? This feels like a Soulless Cashgrab trying to cash in on Mythbusters popularity... I have an Idea!! Let's make it with Women! We start with two female Mythbusters. Add 1 dude for the Build team then two chicks! One has to be Asian. We'll let Paul Feig Direct! He's good at genderbent soulless cashgrabs! (and low brow comedy)

I mean, if they NEEDED A NEW MYTHBUSTERS SHOW, WITHOUT JAMIE OR ADAM

The Answer would be TOO DAMN FREAKING OBVIOUS!! BUT NOOOOOOOO!