Mar 27, 2024

Temple of the ancients and the KHBS...

 Just like in REMAKE, REBIRTH Goes full Kingdumb Farts in the last two chapters. We go to the Temple of the Ancients in the northern continent. They pretty much changed everything and made it way trippier both ways, good and bad. The whispers make their appearance in the last two chapters. We get more Zack and a shit ton of cutscenes for a moment I thought I was playing a Hideo Kojima game. 7 hours between Temple of the ancients to the ending... and like half of that was cutscenes... and fighting Sephiroth... not jist vanilla Sephiroth, but a Disc 3 God being born.  Yes, Bizarro Sephiroth shiws up wtf. I have to beat him with Cloud, Zack, the rest of the party. Then I face Sephiroth with Cloud and Schrodinger's Cetra. We beat Sephiroth and now we head to the Northern Crater but it doesn't make sense due to Kingdumb Farts bullshit. 

In the remakeverse the dead don't stay dead and that's a load of bullshit. That is one of the things that bothers me from this world... also the KH convoluted nonsensical bullshit that we have mow a Final Fantasy VII Multiverse... French word for seal let's review this bitch!

Graphics:
I think I might be going blind because I don't see any huge difference between PS4 and PS5. Then again it might be my TV. I did get a couple of pictures hiccups on this game but they corrected themselves swiftly... unlike the infamous PlayStation 4 door.
9.5


Music and sounds:
Music is a mixed bag for me because, there are a few things that I enjoy the new rearrangements, others I don't. I'm not a fan of Aerith's new song at Gold Saucer. Blasphemy, I know. It just didn't resonate with me. The Voice work was fantastic for this game. But one person stole the show: Suzie Yeung as Yuffie. Her performance was amazing and she pwrfectly walked the line between annoying and cute, which is perfect for Yuffie. I'm not saying that the rest of the performances were bad, far from it. What I'm saying is that Yuffie's VA stole the show and her performance was memorable. Mainly because her bored and chocobo songs stuck harder with me than Aerith's "buy my CD" performance.
9.5

Gameplay:
It's Final Fantasy 7 remake all over again, but this time they ramped up the amount of mini games. Some are good, some are bad, and others make me think that America didn't nuke Japan hard enough during World War II. The normal aspects of the game are top-notch. How many games not so much. Even G-Bike got nerfed.
9.5 (actual game. Reduced to a 6.5 if we count minigames)

Controls:
They work for the most part... except when they become a bit cumbersome... Cait Sith box toss, I'm most definitely talking about you. G-Bike comes in second. 
8.5

Story:
The Saga continues over the rest of the first Disc 1: From Kalm to the Forgotten Capital. It does a good job for the most part. Many of the changes were good. Personally, not too convinced about the cargo ship, the whole Gold saucer Whodunit Mystery, traversing both Gongaga and cosmo Canyon, and everything from the Temple of the Ancients to the ending. If we remove the multiversal bullshit, the whispers, keeping the dead, dead, the story would be a 7.0 or higher. Unfortunately, I have to give it a 
5.5

Fun Factor:
Despite my complaints aboot controls and Nomura fucking the story up, I did have fun for the most part. Though some areas feel too padded for the sake of padding.
7.5

Overall:
If I ignore the minigames bullshit FFVII Re:Birth by sleep gets an 8.33 but I have to take the minigames into consideration. Which puts the game in 7.83 as its final score. Now we have to see if there will be a Vincent DLC,  since Yuie has a DLC with Remake... yes, I know I have to play the DLC, but that'll have to wait since my next Target is Spider-Man 2. 

Mar 25, 2024

Sidequest time: a FFVIIRe:Birth by Sleep rant

 Kate Sith is a traitor! I fought Don Cornholio and Rufus Shinra (not at the same time) but in the same area. I was forced to date a flat kebab. Game didn't let me screw the date like in the OG. Now the game is forcing me to do some side quests and waste time before unlocking the ending. It's almost as if the game is screaming DO SIDEQUESTS NOW BEFORE REACHING THE FINAL DUNGEON! So here I am right now Searchingnfor Pirate Treasure, avoiding the Gym, dealing with Cactuars, avoiding Hard Fort Condor, dabbling in Queen's Blood. Playing way too many annoying minigames... Fuck Gongaga, Fuck Cosmo Canyon.

I'm gonna say it: Gongaga has only 2 good things:
Cissnei

This fucking theme.  So now I'm in sidequest mode dreading the end and trying to figure out hiw will disc 2 will work because so much has changed... but that's a rant for another time. Yes, I just realized that Moogles are part of a mini game...