I'm not feeling Ravenous

 Feels too much like Metroid Dread.

Not a baaad thing but... it's not like I NEEDS TO GET A SWITCH 2 for it... anyways, I mentioned it because I hadn't earlier... Zero Suit Samus, Hasbro, when?

Kojima has been given the Boot by Sony

 They seem to be loving taking L after L.

XBOX is now partners with Kojima to bring Physint to life... 

As much as I have gripes regarding Kojima and his ego, having a new Metal Gear styled game is printing money. I'm guessing this is payback for Kojima defending physical media.

I fear that post 2028 might mean I end up getting an XboX...

More Zelda News:

 Hasbro will be selling the Master Sword as a role play toy.

It has electronics... but you know what we need? A Role Play non-functional Electronic Ocarina that plays the OoT songs...

IGN has a list of changes from N64 to Switch 2 versions of Ocarina based on what Nintendo revealed. Coolest one to me is that you can hum or play real life instruments and the game will recognize the songs.

You know you thought of that too...

Unlike Squareenix, Nintendo understood the assignament

 To the point where I MAY get a Switch 2 post 2028.

There is nothing I can say that would make the trailer Justice... looks like Ocarina of Time, sounds like Ocarina of Time, but with graphical upgrades and voice acting. All in One game... not a Young Link game with an Adult Link sequel on the Switch 3.

It came from the Toy Chest: This isn't M.Tyson.

 It's a Boxer played by 50 cent. I forgot to tale the boxed pic long ago...

So, Balrog, the last Shadaloo King.

He's the Disgraced Boxer who joined Bison to beat people up for fun... 

Articulation:

We know what to expect from Jada... he's well articulated. Waist twist scares me a little, though.

4.5

Paint and sculpt:

He looks the part and most of him is molded in the proper color.
His missing tooth is a void innthe sculpt and not paint.

5.0

Accessories:

Alternate head

Alternate hands

Punch effects

5.0

Overall:

Boxer gets a 4.83 as his final score. If his waist twist didn't give me a scare that it's so tight it might break he'd be perfect.

Bonus review:

Logan Paul basic figure. Yeah, I bought a $20 basic figure... curse mom and pop pharmacy prices. Some insufferable little shit YouTuber turned wrestler.

Articulation:

He's basically the equivalent to Rey Mysterio from the Lucha Lowrider... but with a different body. Same articulation as the Kid Core MOTU.

4.0

Paint and sculpt:

Looks like Logan Paul but with less paint detail.

4.5

Accessories:

N/A

OVERALL:

Logan Paul gets a 4.25 as his final score. I disagree with the math, but the math don't lie.

Street Fighter 2nd Trailer

 Has Dan, Zangief, Dhalsim stretching, E.Honda and hints of Evil Ryu.

Holy shit! We have another Masters of the Universe here... there I said it. Won't be Assassin's Fist good but better than the 94 movie Minus Raúl Juliá. Also, trailer was relased on a Tuesday.

Elon Musk won't play GTA6

 Elon Musk says he won't play GTA6 Because he doesn't like to kill NPCs, much less the police.

This is just as stupid as the women Claiming GTA6 = adultery. Seriously, is there something in the water that is making people absolute morons... playing a crime simulator game and getting mad at the game having the player commit crimes...

I can't even...

Stupidest thing ever: playing GTA6 = Cheating on youe partner.

 I don't know if this is ragebait or if this is women being stupid... not all women.

But this has caught IGN's attention, which in turn caught mine. 

Seriously, what the actual fuck? Women are jealous of polygons, pixels. Zeroes and ones...

What's worse is that to look for that clip, Blogger ignored my query and looked for other stuff... when I went to YouTube it put me on a suicide help screen that wouldn't go away despite me clicking the Show anyway button.

So

Final Fantasy VII part 3 trailer 2

 Seems that Ruby and Emerald may be Mandatory bosses as they have cutscenes from vehicular fighting and we also parachute to places from the Highwind.

 I fear the minigames if they are more kike Cait Sith's box bullshit.

I only hope that we actually get a disk version of this game. Because it is kind of shady knowing that I have the first 2 games in physical, and then that will be digital.

I want to see a confirmation that the Kebab girl at the end of Rebirth is JENOVA manipulating Cloud.

We need a true TANKCERATOPS!!

Capcom will celebrate Resident Evil's 30th with life sized statues of characters.

 Among them are Albert Wesker and Ara ara Dommy Mommy Dimitrescu. That is all. At least they aren't doing life sized sex dolls or anything.

Yeah, there are Resident Evil sex dolls... No Claire, Sheva, Rebecca, or Grace dolls so far...

But look who made it to the Sex doll list... there's also one from Death Stranding... but forgot to take a screenshot.

Shit, Shenmue has gotten big enough to get a sex doll.

Top game characters for Hasbro to make

 There are rumors that they could be doing FFVII for the 30th anniversary. Ouch.

So here's  a list of characters that would be cool if they could make as a small line or added as guests to GI JOE.

Sam Fisher:

If Lara Made it to GI Joe, Sam Fisher *Needs* to make it.

Agent 47:

They practically have everything minus the head.

Metal Gear Solid:

This one lends itself for a sub line, but I'd take a MGS1 Snake with a second MGS2 styled head.

I would add: Liquid, Ocelot, Meryl, Otacon, Grey Fox.

Castlevania:

Personally I'd go with Simon Belmont, then the Symphony of the Night characters.

Uncharted:

Actual Uncharted stuff not Tom Holland.actual drake, sully, chloe, elena...

Street Fighter: (94 movie and game)

There were Joes from that movie... I just want a goddamned Raul Julia figure.

Shenmue:

Like there's no way I was going to sneak Hazuki into the list.

Final Fantasy VIII:

... Add triple triad cards as an accessory.

Punch out:

I'm totally not trying to make a Captain N roster.

Megaman 12 new trailer: with more R34 bait

 Imagine VOCALOID Miku combined with Jubilee from X-men. You get Twinkle Girl...

And she's dead...

Nuff said.

Golden Axe series for Paramount+

 I did play some Golden Axe way back then, but it's SEGA doing something that isn't Sonic.

People are hating that it's too self-aware. Self-referential and a little bit too Meta.

The game's ending..

Yup... it fucks up everyone's complaints about the series.

Now, I kind of want one for virtua fighters, virtua cop, Altered Beast, and

If I have to suffer having this earworm, so shall you!

Live action Kratos is an Animal

 Evolution is a mystery so many changes no one can see... wait were those the lyrics? Anyway, Batista will be Kratos.

Will he bulk up for the role? Or will he wear a musclesuit?

Really Haley Joel? YOU HAD TO SEE KAIRI?

 Hayden Panettiere...

Yes, that Hayden Panettiere...

Well... 

We got Coco for KH4 and now Kairi's first VA was seen by Sora. She was dealing with PPD and addiction, which is why she as replaced for KH3.

So, I suppose Ms. Stoner will keep playing the role of Kairi... 

My condolences to friends and family, but Kingdom Hearts Animated series... also, KH4 may be digital only since it can delay to 2028.

I beat Ivalice Chronicles:

 I got to appreciate it for what it is... and it has a new game+ in addition to (un)fortunately put Cloud on average level to my characters. But going through chapter 1 with level 99 Ninja Arithmeticians is wild. The bad thing is that the trophies in game don't carry over so you have to rewin them... Deep Dungeon Midlight's Deep here we go again.

Now Tactics Advanced Collection, please... or an enhanced port of

Marvel Cosmic Invasion: Shredder's Revenge but with Marvel.

 The game feels VERY Shredder's Revenge-like... Not because it's made by the same people tht made Shredder's Revenge. It's because it feels very respectful of the universe and characters. It gives off a Marvel Animated series vibe, just like Shredder's Revenge was a love letter to the 1987 TMNT. 

Wolverine is Cal Dodd, Jean Grey is Jennifer Hale and Spider-Man...

Is Meowtacular... Seriously, Josh Keaton has played Spider-Man AND Spider-Man ersatz characters. He even played a Spider-Man inspired villain in DC. 

I haven't gotten the Penis and Thing DLC...  I will later. Bills come first. 

So the rant won't be a review but a top 12 Wanted DLC characters:

12: Johnny Storm:

We got The Thing and his temporary replacement on the F4, She-Hulk... It makes sense to have Torch... also one of Spidey's buddies.

11: Iceman:

Frank Welker needs to voice him in the gayest Fred Jones voice he can do.

I don't think I'll add Firestar.

10: Reed Richards:

His stretching and reshapingcould provide some cool moves. The story is F4 heavy, so let's get as many of the F4 in it.

9: DareDevil:

Street Level Hero... self explanatory. Perfect for a beat-em up.

8: Shang Chi: 

Master of Kung Fu... literally made for a Beat-em up.

7: Iron Fist: (Danny Rand)

Same reason as DD and Shang Chi.

6: Nick Fury Sr.:

Needs to be voiced by The Hoff. A nice way to bring Gunplay without bringing Castle.

5: Hulk:

We have She-Hulk, we need the OG Hulk, because Hulk Smash

4: Sue Storm:

I said Bring the Fantastic Four and I wasn't gonna put Richards in 4... the joke works better in Spanish. Giggity! 

3: Nightcrawler:

Sword, teleports. Perfect...

2: Wonderman:

For the sake of having some Avengers representation.

1: Gambit:

Stick, cards... if we get Chris Potter to voice him again, we're golden.

Honorable mentions:

Dazzler, Black Cat, Namor, Hawkeye, Punisher, Colossus, and Vision...

You all should know why. They all have appeared in past Marvel beat-em up games.

Soem SDCC news: MotU, GI Joe, Street Fighter

 Jada made me think of Mattycollector. The headpack sold out in less than 5 minutes... couldn't even try to order as it was sold out once I got to the SDCC page.

BigBadToyStore and Entertainment Earth have the GI Joe Classified Lara Croft. $45... yikes! One must be an idiot to pay that... I will be an idiot then. Managed to preorder her.

Mattel is rebooting Origins and now they will integrate Build a Figure to the line... if only they fixed distribution issues as the last Origins I saw were the TMNT crossover and those were at a mom and pop pharmacy, not a big retailer like say Walmart.

Shadow Beast and Mask of Power monster (green) are the BAFs. 

Hasbro is doing Zelda now

 They are starting with Tears of the Kingdom

I'm not gonna lie these look nice. I kinda get why we're doing tears of the Kingdom... personally, I hope we get some more classic Zelda stuff.... like the best Link ever paired with Zelda and Ganon. Also, please pink haired Link to the Past Link Save Ocarina stuff for like wave 10 or something.

MY HERO MACADAMIA'S Videogame seems familiar.

 Feels like a copy of the Xenoverse and Ninja Storm games. But not a good one.

Should've gotten the PS5 one... for an extra $20 after taxes and I would've gotten a version of the game with the entire 1-A class, and Neito Monoma, Itsuka Kendo, and Tetsutetsu representing 1-B... Dammit, no Ibara Shiozaki... I wanted to beat the shit out of Mineta with Jesus Plant Girl...

Honestly, the game is mid. Will play it and beat it becaise I paid $24 with Endeavor DLC...

Shame it has no English voices...