Aug 28, 2022

Making a Case of Ch'rell, the Utrom Shredder in TMNTU

 I know that "He's not vintage" and all that crap. At the same time it allows for SOME part reuse from Krang's Android body. I know that it doesn't make sense given the size of vintage Krang and having a 12 foot Shredder... but at the same time it's a Shredder Mech suit driven by a villain crazier than Krang. He can easily be fit into the "vintage inspired new canon". Whether Krang is retconed into an Utrom in this continuity or not makes little difference.  They can make a Kang the Conqueror homage with Ch'rell for all I care. All I want is an evil Utrom or Utrom-Looking Alien piloting a Giant Shredder Mechsuit.

I almost forgot that Multiversal crossovers are canon in most TMNT continuities. So no real explanation is needed for Ch'rell. Also, Ch'rell can be used as an excuse to refresh the Turtles with 2k3 variants. (New belts and using the existing figures with the modern heads and different accessories based on the 2k3 toys). 

The Normal 2003 Shredder already has a semi robotic look that could lend itself for an Utrom android body. So in a way it makes sense to use Krang's Android body for him. The forearm Armor could be a piece that slips up the normal KAB forearms, the Lower legs would have to be new. The Torso would have to be new, but it could take some cues from the OG Android Body. Instead of the normal door, it could get 2 ibterchangeable chest plates. One solid colored and the other translucent.

The only reason I'm asking for the huge ass Ch'rell is because the theoretical KAB will be huge, since the upcoming Krang is not made to scale, just like the Vintage line. If we were to get a "to scale" KAB it would be closer to the smaller version released.

Because it a smaller Android Body is released, then a Mumm-Ra sized Ch'rell Android body wouldn't be as far-fetched. Whether big or small, a Ch'rell as Shredder would be badass.

Aug 26, 2022

George RR Martin has gone the way of porn game makers

 What do I mean with that? Well, usually porn game makers give some estimated release dates and then the date comes and no release. They make up excuses and keep stalling while raking Patreon money... then they make up excuses while not giving any tentative release date. George RR Martin has reached that point now. Now the comparison stems from the character ages in the books. Khal Drogo was 30 when he popped Daenerys Targaryen's 13 year old cherry. Has scenes of familial love... I'm talking Incest and has a thing to put extremely young nubile teens in dangerous situations where they can be raped or killed. Then there are the food and gore fetishes he has...

My Mom was ALIVE, when Georgie Slow ass Molasses RR Martin announced The Winds of Winter over 10 years ago... Still waiting... but it's funny the excuses he's using now. Blaming his customer base for being angry at HIS IRRESPONSIBLE BEHAVIOR! He finds it Grisly that people are worried that he MAY DIE BEFORE FINISHING THE 2 REMAINING BOOKS! Well, there is a solution for that: FINISH THE GODDAMNED BOOKS and people won't worry about you dying. You are 73 and obese... as an obese person myself, I'm well aware of the lower life expectancy that we have due to our weight, so I understand why people react that way. Even I have fallen into the same trap as well. But even if you weren't obese, you're in your 70s. That also lowers your life expectancy. No matter how we slice it, the odds aren't in your favor. This isn't a 2 or a 15 month delay...  the first tease of Winds of Winter was released in the early 2010s. We're in the early 2020sand still no book. The TV adaptation came, had to improvise the final 3 seasons, the series ended, and has been mostly forgotten, aside the final season being a clusterfuck of failure.

The TV show has pretty much killed most of the good will audiences had towards this story. The fact that THEY STILL WORRY ABOUT YOU DYING BEFORE THE BOOKS ARE OVER, is in a weird way, showing that the audience STILL RESPECT YOUR VISION, GRRM!! They don't want another making up bullshit endings like the TV show people did. The fact that you keep getting into "distractions" and "excuses" to not finish the last two books SCARES your loyal audience. At least they haven't turned on you like it happened to J.K. Rowling.


Aug 25, 2022

Zaslav just lost 20 BILLION while attempting to save 3 BILLION...

 While the 3 Billion he's trying to save is in actual cash, Warner Brothers has lost 20 Billion in stock value. While the monies are different, the fact that the company is losing money at the stock market is NOT A GOOD THING. It kinda reminds me of other companies like KB Toys, Toys R Us, and... who's playing Jamboree right now?

As I was saying: Lower stock value will mean more cuts... more cuts will mean less quality in products and less amount of products... Shazam! 2 and Aquaman 2 got delayed yet again... Zaslav has gone on a cancelation spree...

It's even raising red flags in the anti-trust area... with the whole avoiding monopolies thing. But one thing is now more certain than ever: Warner Brothers can't afford going intk projects wasting money for underperforming movies. I'm not talking about Snyder here. I mean in general. Their main problem is David Zaslav... the guy who turned The Learning Channel into the Honey Boo Boo network, turned Discovery into the Pee drinking naked survival bullshit... allegedly the Hub and Mythbusters were his moves too... Which meant that non-discovery related channels would have to join in on the Reality TV bullshit and The History Channel stopped talking Hitler and became Pawnstars, American Pickers, and...
I'm not going to say Ancient Aliens but it's Ancient Aliens. Zaslav was the person who tipped the scales in favor of More Reality TV, less Educational programming. He also has an issue with Animation and Children's programming. Based on his record, it seems that Scripted programming is something he dislikes... WB is ALL about Scripted programming. So yeah... this isn't lookong that great for Warner.

Aug 24, 2022

TMNT rumor about some characters being off-limits

 Apparently, Guerrilla Gorilla was used instead of Sgt. BANANAS, due to some rights issues. I don't have all the details, since this is based on speculation. It seems that the person who designed Sgt. Bananas or some third party might have enough leverage to keep him from the line... other characters may be on the chopping block as well. The weird thing is that allegedly Wingnut and Screwloose are on the banned list... which I don't understand since NECA made them and Wingnut appeared on Shredder's Revenge. I know that for Usagi, NECA had to deal with Stan Sakai. I guess that Super7 would have to do the same. This also applies for Panda Khan and now possibly other characters. The reason I'm commenting on this is based on the rumor that Wingnut and Screwloose are on the banned list. I want my goshdarned Batman parody!

I will assume it's fake news, but if this rumor is true, I hope that they can iron everything on, because it would suck if they can't make Pizzaface due to rights issues. But if they can use other media to "Bypass issues" then as I've said before, 2012 has a Tatsu we could use and beat NECA to the punch. Leaning towards Mirage, even if NECA is making Mirage figures would not be a bad idea... assuming the legal stuff allows it.

Also, The infamous Shredder variant is on wave 8 because allegedly they went overbudget on wave 7 and they had to cut back on wave 8 to balance things out... but again, obscure canceled version of Shredder (because metallic paints are more expensive) that no one knew about until 30+ years later makes more sense than using existing valid variants that require Zero new tooling... (Mirage or Toon Repaints) or a new variant with zero new tooling, the Mirage Shredder Clone. This could've led to the other Mirage Shredder clones. 

Hopefully, after this, they'll learn to have contingency "refreshing variants" of existing characters. I know that they couldn't use the obvious solution for this wave due to a stupid GITD variant, but next time: when on a pinch, rerelease the Foot Soldier and people will army build. Maybe by spending some tooling budget preemptively for some alternate weapons for the Foot Soldiers and Shredder would be a nice idea. A katana, pair of Tonfa, a spear, a kusarigama and Thermite Grenades could make an alternate set of weapons. 

But this issue shows that it's a bit Too Early on the line to have a decent library of "reissues"/redecos... Especially with the rather expensive price tag these figures have. The reason variants like Wacky Action, storage shell,  headdropping turtles exist were to "refresh" the originals without being a blatant reissue. Nowadays we do not need those gimmicks, since they're items for the adult collector. Maybe if Super7 hadn't been wasting resources in GITD turtles, foot soldier, etc. then they could've cooked some interesting redecos ie, Mirage, cartoon, 2k3, or other color variants. Maybe even swapping heads, like say: Leonardo with Raphael's head in Leonardo colors, Raphael with Mike's head in Raphael colors, Mikey with Donnie's head in Mikey colors and Donatello with Leo's head in Donnie colors...

But this is armchair commentary speculating about rumors that may not be true...


Aug 23, 2022

Looking back at Final Fantasy Tactics

 I could've sworn I made a review of this game, when the PSP "Enhanced Port" came out... well, I'm playing the Mobile version port of the Enhanced Port... so that means that Ramza sounds like Static Shock, Delita plays us like a damn fiddle! Agrias will... defeat... sin... so she can stop dancing and Princess Ovelia is none other than The Lady Ashe... whose game is connected to this one... man, I wanna play FFXII. But back to Tactics... the game that is hailed as THE BEST SPIN-OFF GAME of the Final Fantasy series.

Story:
The land of Ivalice has been ravaged by the 50 years war. After "achieving peace" war once again looms on the horizon. The King couldn't pay for the services of knights and peasants who acted as soldiers in the war. Distrust towards nobility increased as the people of Ivalice grew hungry and sick. Meanwhile, shadowy plots were forming around the king.
His two sons died and the king adopted his half-sister as an heir, due to his failing health... much to the surprise of everyone, the Queen gave birth to a young prince, Orinus... or Orinas in the PS1 version... which has created a dispute on who should be heir, the 15 year old "adult" Princess Ovelia, or the newborn Orinus with his mother acting as Regent. Dule Goltana, the Black Lion roots for Ovelia, while Duke Larg roots for Orinus. This royal feud is the base for the War of the Lions... A civil war in which both the Black and White Lions were severely weakened and led to the rise of the Mysterious Delita Hyralas the king who united Ivalice... but that's the sugar-coated version. The real version of the events, as told by Orran Durai, a heretic, were suppressed by the Church. The suppression and branding of Durai as a heretic had to do with Durai writing about another Heretic, who was the true hero of The War of the Lions. A man who stood against the world and uncovered the rotten truth of Ivalice... a man known as Ramza Beoulve. Now where does that leav us?

We're Ramza Beoulve, youngest child of Barbaneth (Balbanes) Beoulve, one of the Heroes of the fifty years war. Barely a Squire at the Gariland Magic Academy, Ramza gets entangled into the mess that became The War of the Lions... 
10

Graphics:
This is a PS1 game. Compared to current Generation graphics is a disservice to the game itself. The PSP "Enhanced port" didn't tweak the gameplay graphics much, but they added cutscenes in a stylized look. For its time, late 1997-early 1998, They are good. Personally, I think they managed to handle the 2D sprite on 3D background aspect better than say, Xenogears. The mobile port polished the art slightly, but it doesn't look that much different.
8.5

Music and sounds:
Squaresoft games have often excelled in the music department and FFT is no exception. Sadly the PSP port and the Mobile port suffer, because the music sounds slightly Off. But the Portable versions have voice acting that the original PS1 game lacked, so it's a trade-off...
Personally l, I prefer the PS1 version music wise...
9.5

Gameplay:
This is a turn based Strategy Game, not your standard JRPG, like the numbered Final Fantasy games. Here you control a Party of Five... I'm not even going to reference the show with Neve Campbell and Jennifer Love Hewitt. Most of you wouldn't get the reference... myself included.
Unlike your average Final Fantasy, Terrain is everything. You need to move through it to attack your enemies... and yes, Getting the High Ground CAN BE HELPFUL... but it doesn't guarantee victory... (getting flashbacks of PS1 army of Knights all armed with Excalibur and Math Skill as the second job using Level 3 Holy)
Or the terrifying Monk with the Ninja Dual Wield skill...
The Dual Wielding Monk setup makes the Wiegraf/Belias fight a piece of cake... for those of you who don't know THIS BATTLE is the one that Usually breaks people who are ill prepared and accidentally saved before this battle, forcing a hard Restart... not reset, but Restarting a new game. And yes, I used this strat on Mobile... since they patched A LOT of the PS1 glitches (9999 Job Point, Item duplication), the game takes a bit longer now. So, in order to progress with the game you need to learn multiple jobs and become a highly skilled warrior. You can go for physical abilities with jobs like Knight, Dragoon, Monk, Archer, or Ninja, to name a few. You could go for a Magic based job like White Mage, Black Mage, Mystic, or Arithmetician. Or you could make a Magical paladin type of character by combining Physical and Magic.

It can be overwhelming at first... back wjen I played it in 98, the game overwhelmed me enough to quit the game for over a year... and it wasn't on the infamous Wiegraf fight... it was WAY EARLY on the game.
Once I restarted a new game, everything fell into place. So taking that into consideration, i must give it an 
8.0

Controls:
This game was made for console in mind, but it works pretty decently on the touch screen. My fat fingers might have an issue with my small phone screen (you've all seen my typos) but it works as it should.
9.0

Fun Factor:
I know that kids nowadays can't stand turn based combat. Back in my day it was a niche genre, now it still is, but Final Fantasy has lost its way... Tactics is a reminder of how much Square Enix have been corrupted by Western Sensibilities and lost what made them appealing in the first place. While it's not exactly the best game for portable gaming (battles could theoretically take hours when not prepared against a flock of yellow chocobos Choco Curing each other). Personally, based on my experience with the game AFTER I got the hang of it, I give it a 10.0

Overall
As much as I love the game, I am trying to give it an unbiased look. Based on the ratings I used, Final Fantasy Tactics gets a 9.17 as its final score. Now while the game is a high ranking game for me, I'm aware that it has some issues and that Turn Based Strategy Games are NOT Everyone's cup of Tea.

Aug 22, 2022

Hasbro finally remembered Dino Thunder

 Lightning Collection has been a blessing for Mighty Morphin Power Rangers fans. They got the Rangers, main bad guys, and key Monsters...
 Other eras haven't been as lucky.  I believe only In Space has been the only series that has received nearly as much attention as Mighty Morphin. Dino Thunder has been on limbo for quite some time, which is funny since it is a really small line-up in comparison to other Ranger eras. 
5 rangers 3 main villains... and we already got 3 rangers:
DT Red, DT Blue, DT White.
All we need is: DT Yellow, Mesogog, Elsa, Zeltrax, and Tommy Oliver.

Well, Hasbro announced that for 2023 we'll be getting Kira the Yellow Dino Thunder Ranger...
It's been ages since we saw a Dino Thunder release. Now all I need is Mesogog, Elsa, Zeltrax, and Dr. O... AND I wouldn't be surprised if we get a clear Dino Thunder Black Ranger variant.

They did a decent likeness to Emma Lahana circa the first few episodes of Dino Thunder. I need to be on the lookout for her.

Aug 19, 2022

He-Man and the Masters of the Universe season 3 dropped yesterday and

 Eeeh! It exists... I had completely forgotten that Merman was George Takei... and he says the thing... what thing? You know the thing...

So, basically, Skeletor and Rule 63 Ram Man are teaming up since he's now a voice in her head. Now they have the power to summon zombie Snakemen... they did the Snakemen dirty. They're using them to search for... something that I'll spoil after the jump.

13 years... The House of Rants is 13 years old...

 Most blogs die by the 33rd month... I have that beat for 10 years... I literally spent my 30s blogging. I started in my late 20s and now I'm in my 40s... I-I-I can't believe it... I stuck to this and somehow managed to beat the 10 year mark... How is it possible!?

The answer is simple: it's not about the money. Sure, getting my first paycheck after 13 years would be awesome, not gonna lie. It's a bonus... besides, I'll probably be dead by the time I reach the second Paycheck from blogging... and George RR Martin will still be readying The Winds of Winter... or dead and someone else would be carrying on his duties. The reason I blog is to vent about some stuff... whether I love it or not is irrelevant.it just needs to draw my attention. I have to admit that Real Life™ has gotten in the way of my posting. Sometimes it almost feels like a chore... *cough cough* Advent Calendar *cough cough* I've felt a bit of burnout at times. Mostly due to Real Life™ issues. I'm working on some of those right now. 

Thing is that as I'm now in my 40s and dealing with a lot of stuff on my plate and the global situations have me questioning myself. Getting bent out of shape due to toys, movies, or videogames; is it really worth it? Some might say that I should "ease up" on the angry reactions, but this issue also happens with positive posts as well. But it's not just the blog related stuff... I'm losing interest in things I enjoy. Currently dealing with a Medical Professional, because I have to make sure it's  depression, stress, anxiety, insomnia related, or not.

While it has been hard at times... venting here has actually helped me with my struggles. It gave me a sense of normalcy when my life got flipped turned upside down... and I TRULY agreed with the Elric brothers and their boneheaded decision. I want to believe that writing on this blog has given me a BIT of clarity and in a way protected my sanity. 

I honestly don't know what the future will bring... but so far, I want to keep on going, not just for my loyal 20 readers, but for myself... maybe one day before 2040 I'll be able to reach the legendary First Paycheck achievement from Blogger or Google... hell, I have no idea who would be the one paying me for all of this...

It's been one hell of a ride... but we're not here to hear me mope about my Real Life™ issues. Let's talk about something else!

Evolution of Board games: a rant

Board games have to adapt and evolve... for example, The Game of Life is completely different. The 60s version is not the same as the 70s/80s (the main difference between 70s vs 80s was dollar values.) Then the 90s version added some different gameplay elements and so did the 2000s and 2010s. My issue is that since I never saved the late 80s Game of Life I had as a kid, I'm now SOL and can't play the Game of Life as I knew it... so, what I'm going to suggest is a Special "Deluxe" collector's edition of The Game of Life, that while not a 100% Accurate representation of the board and game piece to the era, it has all the stuff required to play the game from each era... you get the "60s board" and accessories, you get the "70s-80s board" with its era accessories, the "90s version" with its era appropriate accessories, and current version. 

Something similar could be done with Mousetrap. But instead of an all in one releasing multiple versions based on past eras of Mousetrap. Like say: 1970s Mousetrap and have the game be the 1970s version while the box has 70s inspired art. Then 1990s Mousetrap would be the 1990s version of the game, with each version being released having not only a dofferent ruleset based on its era, but the Rube- Goldberg trap being different.

Same thing would apply to Clue. It should have the Traditional Clue board and the things from the less Popular and discontinued Discover the Secrets version. With Traditional you get 2 boards... the older version with older spacing for the characters where you can use Mrs. White and the modern version with the new spacing and Dr. Orchid replaces White.

The idea is to "preserve past versions" through educating the newer generations of their games' histories. That way they can connect to older family members... and to coax the old farts into accepting the newer versions. 

Let's leave Mr. Bucket out if this...

Aug 18, 2022

TMNTU repaints to keep key characters around...

 Wave 8's Shredder repaint is driving me nuts in good and bad ways... I understand the idea of keeping core characters available, but THAT Specific repaint feels so out of place because it "doesn't make sense". So, since it's the night before this Blog's Anniversary, I decided to try again another TMNT List.

But SIMPLE repaints are bullshit. If we have to buy the same vanilla figures again, MAKE ME WANT THEM!! A simple repaint won't be enough.

Let's use the turtles as an example:
I'm going to dub these the "Brown Belt Variants"
because the biggest change is the belts being brown instead of black and their pads and wrist bands would be brown too. It's literally the vanilla figure but with those parts mentioned in brown.

Brown Belt Leonardo:
-A New serious extra head. (No teeth showing, stern look)
-2 Ninjato from sewer Samurai Leo
-Kunai and Shuriken from Sewer Samurai Leo
-2 New Pointing hands (meant to be as a normal human 2 finger ninja pose hand)
-Turtle Communicator 
-Standard hands

Brown Belt Donatello:
-A new extra head  with a quizzical expression
-New removable "custom" Jeweler Glasses/goggles
-2 Turtle Communicators (one in Mikey colors)
-2 hands with small precision tools presculpted in them to "fix Turtle Communicators"
-Teacup from Splinter 
-Standard hands

Brown Belt Raphael:
-A New screaming head 
-Kunai and shuriken from sewer Samurai Leo
-Turtle Communicator
-Katar blade
-2 Manriki-gusari (nod to the Nightwatcher Raphael) one sculpted as Raphael twirling it, the other being flung at an enemy.
-Standard hands

Brown Belt Michelangelo:
-Sewer Surfer Mike Tongue Head
-2 Twirling nunchucks (like the ones from S7Ultimares Bruce Lee)
-2 normal nunchucks
-1 new extra pointing hand with hile on finger for twirling action (like NECA TMNT movie accessory pack)
-1 Nunchuck that can be put on the twirling hand.
-Personal Pizza on tray that can be put on the twirling hand.

That's it for the Turtles... now let's tackle some non Turtle characters.

Master Splinter:

Splinter would be mostly out of the normal Splinter with a new ball peg that allows for swapping heads and a slightly lighter brown color and the tail painted in flesh tones.
-new Cloth Kimono with Sleeves and Shredder's cloth belt
-Cane sword
-normal Cane
-normal hands
-Teacup
-Kettle
-new Extra Head with more "Toon-inspired" look
-Bow and arrows
-New Quiver
-sushi pieces

Rocksteady:
Rocksteady would require a new ball joint that allows for head swapping and repainted in a more familiar Toon palette.

- New Extra Head without helmet in an angry pose.
-New "Toon inspired" Bandolier with removable Wooden Sword.
-Evil communicator (as seen on vintage Super Shredder)
-2 open hands for panicked or kidnaping April poses.
-pointing hand to use with the Communicator or threatening the Turtles.
-normal hands
-His rifle and knife

Bebop
Repaint Bebop in Toon colors
-Open and pointing hands same as Rocksteady.
-Evil Communicator
-Triceraton Gun (similar to a gun he used on some episodes)
-normal hands
-his drill gun and trashcan
-Foot Soldier mace (reference to Shredder's Revenge)

This just of the top of my head. I'm not adding Casey or April, since I've gone over them a few times (Mirage repaints). If repaints are the only solution instead of brand spanking new variants, then make them worthwhile!!

Aug 17, 2022

Tim Burton's Wednesday seems interesting...

 Best part so far is that neither Johnny Depp nor Helena Boham Carter are on sight..
Nothing personal against Johnny Depp but, Tim Burton seem to overuse him in his movies just like Helena Bohan Carter.

 Basically, it's The Addams Family,  as Tim Burton sees it, but the focus is on Wednesday...
Now the question remains... will Gomez and Morticia have a similar chemistry as previous Gomez and Morticia... not going to mention any names, but I'm referring to Tim Curry and Darryl Hannah... Who am I kidding, I'm referring to Raúl Juliá and Anjelica Houston OF COURSE!!

I already said of course! Also, it's Wednesday, not Tuesday. The new Gomez and Morticia are Luis Guzmán and Catherine Zeta-Jones... cue Nostalgia Critic obsession.

I do have an issue... or 20, but it's not "Eww Luis Guzmán!" That everyone is having. I'm more worried about Catherine Zeta-Jones. Luis Guzmán is the closest thing to a Comic Gomez that Live Action has gotten. Not to mention that he's a good actor. But if something worries me is that Luis Guzmán is no Raúl Juliá. Also, it doesn't help that all I see is GTA's Ricardo Diaz whenever I hear Guzmán talk.
So I may not be the best person qualified to judge him... with my simping for Raúl Juliá, the judgment would be super biased.

Guess we'll wait until the show premieres.

TMNTU wave 8 revealed: thoughts

 I am a little disappointed in the lack of Pizzaface on this wave...
I also only guessed Raph the Space Cadet correctly.
But here's the 4 figure wave known as 8:
Raph the Space Cadet
Genghis Frog
Robotic Rocksteady
Shredder 88 (silver variant)

Let's start with Raphael:
He has a few extras that are quite neat! The Laser Sai and second head have a Star Wars vibe to them. The little alien is the one that was attached to the back of the figure... clever... I'm hoping the stuff on his front is sculpted and not a sticker.

Genghis Frog has tons of texture and sculpted detail that weren't as detailed on the vintage toy. The Removable necklace gives me hope that a repaint could be made for Rasputin or Attila. If these were cheaper, I'd buy 4 Genghis and make Classicized Toon Punk Frogs to use a Neitlichian term.

Robotic Rocksteady is OK... since I missed out on Bebop, I have no use for him... with that said Rocksteady is missing an accessory... the Poke'em prybar.

Shredder... Ooh, where should I start with him?
A stinking Repaint, really!? No new accessories... OK he HAS AN OOZE CANISTER!! HORY SHET! GIMME 3 MORE SHREDDERS!! 
Had this Shredder been, I don't know, a Mirage repaint which Playmates has already done.
You know if they had made an ultimates Shredder in Mirage colors with no new parts, I'd probably buy 2!

This vintage Shredder with silver armor could use a cloth tunic that is tied with the same belt from the cloth cape. That way one could have a makeshift "toon Shredder". 

A Mirage Clone Shredder repaint would've worked too.

A Foot Soldier color scheme for Shredder also would've worked. I know that "there is no precedent" for this color palette, but it makes sense. Master Shredder has a nice ring to it. Also the second head could have a purple helmet with Shredder's skin blacked out like the current second head.

Now if they were REALLY invested, an Oroku Saki Head would have been an incentive to ANY repaint option. If the Saki head is a no-no at the moment, how about some different weapons?
Perhaps weapons meant to be used against each of the Turtles. 

The repainted Shredder feels quarter-assed.



Aug 16, 2022

Genghis Frog has been teased for TMNTU Wave 8:

 Let the Speculation begin! Genghis was in NONE of my straight after Wave 7 reveals Wave 8 speculation post. I'm 97% sure that it is Genghis... but I predicted him on this post from 2021 before Wave 5 was revealed. And I placed him in wave 8, which is the craziest coincidence.

The Body Board shares the pattern on Genghis Frog's shirt.  In a few hours, we'll find out the truth... as always, here goes a Mandatory "Super7 seems to be spreading themselves a bit too thin by pumping out too many figures in a row". Now to this I will add the traditional "How many waves are up in the air right now?" We should've gotten at least 2 out of the multiple waves announced before offering another".

Just in case here are the MIA waves

Wave 5 (Krang, Leatherhead, Ray Fillet, Leo the Samurai)

Wave 6 (Scratch, Slash, Mousers, Ace Duck, Surfin Mike)

Wave 7 (Metalhead Mike, punk Don, Triceraton, Robobop, and sgt. Bananas)

FIller wave of overpriced redecos (GITD Turtles)

Single overpriced redeco wave (GITD Foot Soldier)

That's literally 5 "waves" of figures up in the air and now they tease an 8th wave. Or $1,115.⁰⁰ without counting the 5 shipping charges and taxes. I feel bad for the completists. That's not counting le wagon de fête... at least Thundercats fans are all caught up (aside El Tanque Felino)

Then less talk and more Wave speculation:
I will only do 4 figures since we know Genghis is the fifth. As always, I'll Drop a little tagline or long-winded explanation for each choice.

I think I'll go with the 3 list approach:
What I want. What I'd expect. What I'd hate to see.

What I'd like to see:

Pizzaface:
I understand that there are bad guys who have higher priority, like Krang's Android body, Super Shredder, or Tokka and Rahzar. Believe me, I want them too for roster completion. But as I've stated multiple times, I freaking LOVE Pizzaface. I would be really sad if the line ends without Pizzaface.

Irma:
It's really obvious why she's here. I do have a soft spot for Toon TMNT stuff and since Targets are non-existent in Puerto Rico, well the NECA figure has evaded me. Even with her garish vintage toy colors, it's still Irma...

General Traag:
I've mentioned my dislike for this version of Traag. Problem is that he's one of those "I had him as a kid" figure. While I may feel eeeeh... about him, it could change once he's in-hand... especially if there's a second head that looks less goofy. 

Raph the Space Cadet:
I still stand that This should've been Donnie's disguise, but the I had him as a kid is pushing hard for him.

Now for the ones I'd expect:

Antrax:
Currently, I'm neutral about him, but something in my bones is suggesting that he's a candidate.

Usagi Yojimbo:
Sadly, he will be the armored version... because back in the 80s the armored look was considered more toyetic than the normal look. Then again, Splinter was sleeveless in the 80s line.

Super Shredder:
When in doubt, copy NECA's roster... Here, they could go one of 2 ways:
Mimicking the Vintage line or go "True to scale" like NECA. A HUGE part of me wishes they stay true to scale and give us a Mumm-Ra sized Super Shredder. My wallet not so much. But it had a crazy idea on Super Shredder: 
Using the MOTUC Body for Super Shredder! It keeps him "vintage accurate"

Heavy Metal Raph:
The only reason I mention this varoant is to justify the Previous wave's Punk Donatello.

Now what I'd HATE to see:

Scumbug:
He's not that bad, but he's not exactly a top tier figure...

Doctor El:
Because the Universe hates me, that's why. Wonder if he'll cause a Twitter Meltdown.

Walker:
Because nothing says "Fuck you, Nefty!" like reminding me of a few things:
My Mom is dead, this movie exists, RC cola is the best soda but it's harder to find.

Make My Day Leo:
The excuse is that they already made a Raph variant *exclusive to BBTS) So the 4 Turtle cycle begins anew. I was tempted to put in Bandito Bashing Mike, but that would be overkill with Doctor El and Walker.

I have to wonder how many will I guess...

Thundercats are almost done and not a single Lunattak in sight...

 What's the point of having Lynx-O, Pumyra, and Waluigi if there are no Lunataks?
We have things that come with Waluigi that are references to things with Lunataks, like the red hot reforged Sword of Omens... still no Chilla or Alluro, which are the easiest to make of the Lunataks... the worst part of this is that Waluigi is Already reaching people's hands... like Mine!!
Tygra: I know that this is my punishment for doing drugs at The Garden of Delights, but why Am I stuck with Waluigi here?
Waluigi: For the Umpteenth time, my name is Bengali!!
Tygra: Whatever, Waluigi!!
Waluigi: By insultimg me, you're also insulting yourself, since LUIGI NUMBER TWO!!
Tygra: Shut your whore mouth, Waluigi! Luigi doesn't say that!!
Waluigi: But it is implied, every time Mario says, Mario Number One!!
Tygra: By Jaga! Waluigi is right!
Jaga (VO): Don't get me involved in this shit!!

Tygra is going to be reviewed for the Advent 
Calendar and I might do Waluigi as a normal it came from the toy chest, not sure if I'll finish off the Thundercats gor Advent Calendar or speinkle them, but my point still stands... We only have Snarf and the Thunderkittens left to finish off the Thundercats. Super7 could always do some LJN padding scam waves, but those are bullshit. What will they do for the Thunderkittens? They can't be a ripoff like the Disney Ultimates Alice... just to name a smaller character with a $55 pricetag...
Those of us who kept the Few Mattel Thundercats are literally a Snarf away from completing a Core Thundercats collection...
Think about it combining Mattel's offerings with Super7's we FINISHED the Thundercats minus Snarf, plus we already have Mumm-Ra, Ma-Mutt, and the CORE Mutants (Slythe, Jackalman, Vultureman, and Monkian) 

I know they tried to pad the releases by tossing in things like Pumm-Ra, Captain Saltine American, and others... but now they have no real rivals to sell Lunataks in waves...

I want to whine about LJN Mumm-Ra not coming with a repainted Ma-Mutt while getting a price hike, but I missed my chance... better get ready for today's potential TMNT wave announcement....

Aug 15, 2022

A Candy ass Jabroni who doesn't know his role is why Black Adam and Shazam will never cross paths on the DCEU.

 Despite Black Adam being the main enemy of Shazam. Of course, the candy ass jabroni that doesn't know his role that I'm talking about is none other than:

It doesn't matter what his name is! The People's Chump is such a prima donna that he specifically chose the role of Black Adam, fundedmost of the movie, only to bitch about people wanting him to fight the guy from Tangled. Claiming that the fight would be a disrespect towards the character.

First he bitches and moans about the pointy ears of Black Adam and forces WB to make him look like The Rock... 
The People's Chump needs to get a wig like this and pointy ears to properly play Black Adam.

Why does it feel that this is The Rock being a little bitch and keeping his WWE mentality on film and think that he's jobbing to Zachary Levi?

Top 20 DC Multiverse figures that I want...

 That are not "Secret identities" of Batman and Superman...

I could pad the list with Bruce Wayne, Clark Kent, Barry Allen, and other characters in civilian outfits (Lex Luthor, Selina Kyle, Carol Ferris) sorry Todd, I mentioned 2 females... such blasphemy!! The reason for this list is that I missed out on the AzBat preorder... Sure, I got an Azrael, but when I think of Jean-Paul Valley, I think of the Knightfall version of Him. So, this list is my Copium...

-Spoiler:
I'm talking about Stephanie Brown... a part of me wants her Robin outfit, but then I'd have to ask for Dick, Jason, and Tim as Robin... OK now I want all the Robins to be wearing their Robin suits... but all jokes aside, Todd could also make an unmasked Steph as Spoiler variant.

-Starfire:
The reason I want her is obvious... I want to recreate the Teen Titans Go! Team in "realistic versions" and that includes me hunting down for an unmasked Cryborg. I'd love a classic version, but would settle for a New 52.

-Raven:
Same as Koriand'r. I wouldn't mind a Classic or Nu 52, but I can settle for a Titans Raven. (As a nod to Todd never completing rosters and dropping random variants haphazardly) Here Todd would have up to 4 variants (Hood, no Hood, and the previous 2 with a different colored Raven)

-Beast Boy:
Don't care about the Outfit, just that he's green... red variant could be tossed to Target. The reason has been explained with the past 2 figures, so I won't go at it again.

-Hawkgirl:
Of course, this is to have the JL/JLU team. While i wouldn't say no to a Classic WW,  the Gal Gadot figure is an acceptable Placeholder. We're getting a Hawkman with the Black Adam Wave, so getting a Mismatched Hawkgirl makes Todd Sense.

-Captain Boomerang:
Flash needs something more than a Monkey and a copycat. I was going to say Captain Cold at first, but why ask for Cold, when one can ask for Freeze... so I'm settling with Captain Boomerang.

-Black Manta:
Probably we'll get him from AQUAMOMOA 2, but Aquaman needs someone to fight.

-Sinestro:
Again we have 3 different Green Lanterns and no Star Sapphires or Yellow Lanterns. And Todd could do Atrocitus as a BAF.

-Metallo:
Classic Superman Villain that also lends himself for a variant with GITD Kryptonite... Todd loves his dumb variants to get some reuae out of the molds.

-Cheetah:
Wonder Woman would need a villain, so Cheetah is the most obvious Non-Ares villain. With 5 females on this list, I'm giving Todd a heart attack...

-Plastic Man:
Personally, I'd prefer the classic look, but again, it would traumatize Todd. I'm curious to see if Todd would do a swappable stretched part or two.

-Deadman:
Todd's team could do wonders with the Ghostly Deadman... I can almost see a Ghostly glow variant.

-Vandal Savage:
He would look badass no matter what he's wearing. I'm curious on what Todd could do with him.

-Mongul:
Sure, he'd be a big boy, but he would look so amazing with all the armor details... well depending on which version of Mongul 1 or 2 they make.

-Guy Gardner:
Put him in a Two pack with Batman. One Punch... that's all I'll say.

-Steel:
I want to sneak in the 4 Supermen that temporarily replaced Kal-El after his battle against Doomsday. He would be the first. On his own or in a 2 pack against Cyborg Superman...

-Mr. Freeze:
I mentioned he was going to be on the list. I won't mention my predilection towards the Batman and Robin Mr. Freeze...

-Cyborg Superman:
I had already mentioned Hank Henshaw when dealing with Steel. With a few changed pieces, a Sinestro Corps variant could be made.

- Ultra Humanite:
I was torn between Monsieur Mallah and Ultra Himanite. Both have the brain aspect... Mallah could totally come with the Brain as an accessory (which could lead to a Pinky and the Brain skit, but with a "Smart Pinky", which makes it less fun.) But albino gorilla that looks more Human-like in posture and proportions feels more unique than Monsieur Mallah. Also his head looking like his brain wants to burst out of his skull looks so badass!

-The Flash (Jay Garrick):
Basically he's here to test comic book styled JSA waters... and that I'd prefer to have Jay Garrick over Alan Scott as the sole JSA COMIC BOOK styled character, sonce Black Adam wave will bring some JSA members from the movie.

There you have it, 20 characters without going into deep cut territory, seeing that most of the  characters on the list have had some media representation outside of comics in the past decade.

Honorable mentions:
-Alfred:
The one missing member of the Bat Family... could come with Ace the Bat-hound.

-Amanda Waller:
We have a Task Force X, we need their boss... not to mention having a Waller could make some Batman displays more interesting... or Lex Luthor for that matter. I'd make her a McFarlane store exclusive to avoid the retailer issues.

-Poison Ivy:
Batman villain... nuff said. And something about Harley Quinn and ✂️...

-Speedy:
We have a ton of Robins. We have Wally West... you do the math. Green Arrow needs his own kid to endanger.

-Black Canary:
We don't have her on this line... that's reason enough... also, she could be used as a way to make The Birds of Prey. 

-Manchester Black:
He's better suited for a two-pack with Superman, but he's not a traditional choice.

-Miss Martian:
Again, another "teenage sidekick" for the team. But yeah, I want her mostly for Young Justice references.

- Zsasz:
Make the Arkham version and call it a day... easier to sell him as a tie in to a game than on his own.

-Artemis:
I'm trying to pad Red Hood's team The Outlaws. Also, poor Todd might be getting an aneurysm from reading this list with too many females.

-Jimmy Olsen:
Superman's pal... on his own he wouldn't sell, but on a 2 pack with Dick as Robin... he could reuse the shovel from the Hush 2 pack as an accessory and reference to the story dig now die later. 

Aug 14, 2022

SONY wants to reboot Karate Kid yet again

 As crazy as it sounds, SONY, a Japanese company, is hellbent on rebooting Karate Kid, a movie about an Italian American teen learning the Japanese Martial Art of Karate by using Chinese Actors...

First it was the ret... mentally challenged reboot with Jaden Smith and Jackie Chan, where Jaden Smith learned Kung Fu... not Karate.

Now they want a Chinese kid, who will teach an Italian American grown man, Kung Fu for this Karate Kid Reboot... are you seeing what I'm seeing? 2 Reboots 0 Karate...

This is fucking ret... I mean mentally challenged....  I know that it's bad to say the R-word, but this instance really should be an exception.

The movie is called The Karate Kid. Karate is right there on its name!!

You can't swap out the Martial Art, ESPECIALLY when using a whole different country's Martial Art. It surprises me in a bad way that a Japanese company like SONY is doing this racist bullshit...
Get Japanese actors and have a proper Karate Kid Reboot... emphasis on Karate. If you aren't going to use Karate, then don't call the movie Karate Kid!! Or at least copy the GOOD Karate Kid... the one with the late Pat Morita and with Ralph Macchio...

This Hollywood exec mentality is why we get shit like Dragon Ball Evolution...

Aug 13, 2022

8/13/22 odds and ends: Anne Heche,

 Anne Heche passed away due to complications after her recent car crash. Specifically an anoxic injury to the brain. My condolences to her family, especially the kids she left behind. It's horrible to lose a mother, especially Atlas, who is 13 year old... He's just a kid, for crying out loud! If it's not easy losing one's mother as an adult, I can't dare to imagine what is like for a 13 year old kid... it's incredibly messed up...

I'm not a huge fan of her... I mostly remember her due to her relationship with Ellen DeGeneres... I also saw the Psycho remake, but didn't like it that much. She voiced Lois Lane in a DC animated movie. I think it was Superman: Doomsday. I remember her in a movie with Harrison Ford and can't  remember the name right now... 6 days 7 nights, thanks internet!

Apparently she was in the legend of Korra...

Playmates Toys is releasing an Amazon Exclusive pack of Vintage TMNT figures:
Foot Soldier, Leatherhead, Mutagen Man, and Wingnut... for some reason it shows as unavailable for me. On the other hand Walmart has the Superhero pack with Donatello, Michelangelo, Rocksteady and Bebop disguised as Superheroes. That one I can theoretically order...

I need to get in the Hasbro Selfie Series action... I have commented about this before, but reading this article about the process of making an Action Figure Avatar of yourself is exciting!! Sure, it's $60 plus overpriced FedEx shipping for me, but being immortalized in an official action figure is beyond insane!!

Greg Berlanti's name is on the list of possible candidates to become the DC counterpart of Kevin Feige. Berlanti has been the powerhouse behind the Arrowverse. I got to be honest, the start was really good but eventually due to pressure from Warner and the Network, his universe spiraled out of control. The shows became less about the heroes, but more about their love interests. Felicity and Iris ruined Arrow and Flash respectively. I want a good base and good direction for DC's cinematic new universe. I'm worried that Berlanti's decisions will bow down to pressure from executives that wanted Superman to use the pod he came in as a baby to return to Krypton, which had exploded to smithereens... or whoever approved any of the garbage that Snyder made.

Aug 12, 2022

Masterverse Faker: a rant

 We've seen the Masterverse Faker based on Revelation, which is a "Battle damaged Faker" but with He-Man colors... That's NOT what I want as a Masterverse Faker. Not because of my issues with Kevin Smith bastardized take on MOTU, but the lack of a "Pristine" Faker bothers me way too much...

Before you bother saying:
"UsE aN eXtRa He-MaN fOr ThE pRiStInE fAkEr"
Just shut up. THAT is not the point. For 39 years Faker was He-Man wearing Skeletor's armor with his RGB values swapped. I want sonething closer to that. 
I know that with the 40th He-Man and Skeletor, a 40th Faker could be made as the Traditional style Faker. Revelation got their Battle Dmaged Faker... but what about New Eternia? 
How would they Tackle Faker?

Didn't I do this already once? Wait, Twice!? Wait three times!? I guess 4th one is the charm.
I'm torn between a Thermochromic Pristine Faker or Battle damaged. I also wonder how much should he copy from He-Man  and Skeletor, and how much can he have that isn't an amalgamation of the previously mentioned two?  Is he cybernetic in New Eternia, or is he a product of Forbidden Alchemy and Necromancy? Those types of questions would direct how he would look. This would also mean that Faker would require a variant... I am talking of a Battle Damaged Faker, of course.
For this example, I'll use the Cybernetic angle:
Normal Faker would be using the New Eternia He-Man body with Thermochromic plastic on his flesh pieces. I would also add New Eternia Skeletor's armor and cape. Instead of Faker Orange, it should be in brown with tan accents, and orangey brown cape. The idea is to have a slightly more realistic palette on Faker. The fur trim accents on the He-Man parts should be gray with a blueish tint. The shoulderpads, belt, and bracers should be gunmetal grey. With the blade and axe being in a brassy metallic color. Keeping a more "realistic take" on Faker's palette. 

The Battle Damaged would reuse the Faker torso and arms, but the figure's skin tone would be similar to Skeletor's, while the robotic parts are gunmetal grey. This one would probably require a new Battle damaged head to match the New Eternia He-Man head.

Personally, I'm more inclined towards an undead Faker. My dream Battle Damaged Faker might be a bit too gory for Mattel, even when toned down. First his flesh would be Skeletor colored.
He'd have 2 heads:
One looking like a White eyed NE He-Man and blackish ooze dripping from his mouth
The second head would be more undead-like. Maybe with a gash at the top where an axe could be plugged in. A streak of blackish oose should be dripping from it down his face. The battle damage on his torso should be similar to that of the robot faker, but with organic stuff like guts instead of robotics. Maybe the body should have a few holes that could be plugged by arrows. His hands and feet should be Skeletor's.

The super duper toned down version would eliminate the Zombie holes but keep the black ooze dripping from wounds (painted battle damage like the Origins Battle Damaged Battle Cat) He should get a second Zombie head without the Axe gash. The hands and feet would be Skeletor's. 

By having 2 versions (pristine and Battle Damaged) the fans can take Faker in a direction they prefer on their main displays. Just as fans can have Revelation, New Eternia, 40th anniversary options for their displays. But right now I'm not even sure if Mattel has a coherent plan with Masterverse.

Aug 11, 2022

Stealth Tygra is coming... but it's a BBTS exclusive

 The ONE logical repaint that Super7 could've used as a special filler was given to BBTS... I honestly don't get Super7's logic. It's too confusing. Then there's the other issue: 

The pics used to sell the figure are computer generated and hide a lot of the engineering that would be visible in the final figure. Would it be considered dishonest advertising if the pics ised to promote the actual toy are extremely different from the actual product? Even if the small print says Final figure may vary, wpuld it be disingenuous?

I'm not a lawyer so I cannot answer that question. It would be pretty interesting to see the perspective from a lawyer on this issue. In any case, I preordered mine, because it's stealth Tygra... or "Invisible Tygra" as he's officially called. I have bitched and moaned about this variant way too much to not buy it when available. Now I'll wait as they make Spirit Jaga an Entertainment Earth exclusive... this is not a hint nor a prediction. This is me mocking the practice of exclusives.


An Arkham City wave was announced by McFarlane

 Apparently, it'll be a BAF Wave with Solomon Grundy, Bane, Clayface, or Mr. Freeze being the most likely choices. Seeing that a Killer Croc figure from Arkham Asylum was released recently.

While Todd hasn't given a full release info, he showed the AC Batman, which feels like a ripoff, since it's not AC accurate and it's reusing too many parts from Arkham Asylum Batman. Also the Gold variants have been leaked (black and white versions of some characters) 
The figures leaked are Batman, Catwoman, Penguin, and Ra's Al Ghul.

I hope we can get a Two-Face, if we're lucky, a Talia... for custody jokes about Damian. While it's cool that we're getting non-Batman characters, I kinda wish we could get that treatment for other characters. We got a Black Adam but no normal Shazam... 3 different Green Lanterns, but no Sinestro.  It feels like Batman is getting most of the love here.  Hell, we haven't gotten a Classic Wonder Woman yet we have gotten:
Joker, Harley, Killer Croc, Clayface, Man Bat, Hush, Catwoman, Penguin, Riddler, Deathstroke, Bane, Scarecrow, Robin, Nightwing, Red Hood, Batgirl, Red Robin... 
I'm not asking for Apache Chief or the Wonder Twins here, but give us Metallo, Brainiac, Merlyn (preferably the John Barrowman version for personal reasons), Sinestro just to name a few characters that complement other characters...

But as I say that, I am also wanting an Arkham City Bruce Wayne, an Alfred, a Spoiler, hell give us a Jim Gordon with the bat Signal!

And yes, I will insist on Batman 89 figures
All 3 Batmen, Robin, Batgirl, Bane, Poison Ivy, Joker, Penguin, Catwoman, Riddler, and most importantly 



Aug 10, 2022

38 years of being a Teenager: An interview with Hamato Mikerangero

 Sorry if I butchered the Japanese pronunciation, but my Japanese knowledge comes from Duolingo and watching Family Friendly anime... and I mean really FAMILY FRIENDLY...


This segment is a spin-off of the Life After the Neitlichverse, where I was supposed to interview MOTU characters to see where they were after Classics continuity ended... I will do some of those later, but Now I want to expand that idea and go beyond MOTUC and interview other people from different universes... No, I will NOT interview Cryborg... Today's guest, as I already mentioned is Hamato Mikerangero... also known as Orange Ninja Turtle, the party dude, so, Mikey, welcome to the show...

"Dude, it's totally awesome being here! What you did to the green room was radical!"

Well, the room is meant to help chillax and I just, uh, had it full of chillaxing stuff!! And extra pizza with customizable toppings for my guest!!
Dude, did you try banana and nutella?

No, but now I wanna. I went with tuna spread and mango...

Did you heat up the tuna in the oven or put it on later... not sure about putting mayo in the oven...

Heat up the pizza as normal, once hot, remove the crust and add the tuna spread on top. Roll it like sushi and then add the bits of mango... it's fantastic...

Hmm now tell me that you dipped the crusts in Wendy's frosty?

You HAD FROSTIES? Why no one told me about that! I used mint chocolate ice cream!

Dude, I gotta try that... now, I gotta ask: You're American, raised in a Japanese Household, so Okonomiyaki/pizza hybrid, yay or nay?

Kansai style or Hiroshima style? Also, is it an okonomiyaki with pizza toppings or a pizza with okonomiyaki toppings? There are so many variables on this... I've tried them all. They're an acquired taste for those with more Western palates. 

Damn, I thought that this would've gotten an easy answer... then again, hello! I'm talking with the Pizza connoisseur that rivals Norville Rogers and his extravagant palate.

Dude! Unlike Mr. Rogers, I can handle my meat... 

Umm, *giggling*

Dude! That's not what I meant!

You do you, dude... I know what you meant, you're not a vegan like Shaggy. So you know how to add some seemingly weird combos to pizza... Now, THE pizza question:
Pineapple: yay or nay?

Ooh! You HAD to go there... pineapple is a confusing ingredient, like Chocolate covered grasshoppers or anchovies. They sound gross, but with the right combination of ingredients, they can be made to taste great! 

Hey, you two! Stop writing the 
stoner's guidebook for pizza and get started on the interview...

I've already started the interview, Spike!! So, you're 38 years old and still a teenager... what's it like being, you know, the laid-back, king of the chill, hero in a half shell?

It's really hard being me, dude... I love my dad, Master Splinter, but he trained me and my brothers into being his child soldiers to finish a blood feud between the Hamato and the Oroku.
Everybody thinks that being a ninja is badass... it is, don't get me wrong, but they don't see the darkness that comes with it. You see these hands? These are the hands of a killer, dude! These hands were trained,ever since I could walk and talk, as weapons of human destruction. When I paint realistic human portraits, it's not simply because I can appreciate the beauty in your species. It's because I've studied human anatomy and understand the thousands of ways to end a life. I know which bones to break and cause minor, but severely painful injuries, as well as those to make a swift death look accidental. 

Holy shit, this went dark...

Dude, it gets worse. I am a mellow dude, mostly because I'm afraid... yeah, afraid of the darkness within. I often wish that the feud would end so we could be in peace and that my hands could devote themselves entirely to create instead of destruction. I paint, I write, I dabble in sculpting, because, I want to create, but I am honorbound to my family and must ensure that the feud ends honorably, preferably with the least amount of casualties as possible. I know that Leo is the "honor dude", but honor often requires payments in blood or life... and maybe I'm a bit more of a pacifist...

This is heavy. I was expecting something about partying, having fun, you know, something nice!

I get it, dude! Everyone thinks that I'm the laidback dude, which I am, but, I'm just painting the background on WHY I am something of a hedonist. I'm aware that the term hedonism is a bit loaded, but here's how I Hamato Michelangelo interpret hedonism. Seeking pleasure over pain. It sounds like the common definition, but I'm aware that a certain amount of pain is required to achieve balance. That way we can value the pleasant moments more...

Hmm, I see... kinda like the Bob Ross darkness and light speech.

So, I, as a teenager, I enjoy having fun, do some gaming, dance, paint, write, read, skate, surf, to LIVE!! Spreading happiness through a well timed joke, a silly impression, or simply having fun! If I can make a person smile...

Maybe my shitty life has a purpose...

I wasn't going to use those words, but the idea is similar...

To me it sounds like the mask of a depressed person... I should know, I'm dealing with it... and I use lame attempts at humor as a way to feel some worthiness... but I'm working through my issues with professional help.

That's awesome, dude! The part about getting therapy and working through your issues, I mean! But you may be right... I could be dealing with depression, but it's kinda hard to find a therapist that will work with an uninsured mutant terrapin. Back on topic, I'm into partying, having fun, because it's fun! Think about it: 4 Homeschooled teenage boys, who have been training with a deadlier version of Mr. Miyagi... we eat, drink, sleep Ninjitsu... partying and arts is where I'm just Mikey, not  Michelangelo of Clan Hamato. Leonardo does his katas and his samurai thing... He writes Haiku, meditates, prunes bonsai, you've played Ghost of Tsushina? He goes all Sakai Jin and shit, especially when Usagi shows up! He, as squad leader has a ton of pressure and he doesn't fully know how to unwind... how to be Leonardo the brother instead of Squad Leader Hamato Leonardo. When Father put him in charge, Leo changed. Now he's wound up too tight with his responsibilities and he's mostly focused on how to become a better leader and step up once Fath... Master Splinter is no longer able to be Grandmaster of the Hamato Clan. 
Donatello does machines... he disassembles junk and mades some cool stuff from it. Sometimes he overcomplicates things... But he's the brainy dude! Machines are his thing and he understands them better than he does people.

Let me guess, Raphael is cool but rude?

Gimme a break! He's a brawler... a 5'1" ball of pure unadulterated anger sandwiched between a super hard shell... but despite his badass facade, lies one of the most tender hearts that you've ever met... and I'm going to be so dead now... Yeah, Raph's super tough, a bit hard-headed, but his heart is in the right place. Despite his bickering with Leo regarding missions, there's no one else I'd rather have in my corner. My bro is passionate about what he believes, but sucks at expressing his feelings in verbal ways that aren't snarky. I guess he feels like the burden of Leadership might be too much for Leo and that's why he craves that position. He wants to take the burden off of Leo's shell, but his pride doesn't allow him to properly express himself.

Anyways how is your sex life?

Did you just made a reference to The Room? Dude, I'm a 5'1" Bipedal Turtle. If my brothers and I went to Japan, we could star in shokushu goukan movies... DON'T GOOGLE IT!!

It's Tentacle stuff... I'm a novice in that genre, but some of my favorite H-stuff is in that genre.

Dude, you really are a sukebe... As I was saying:
As a Bipedal Turtle, my dating pool is really small... I can't be with human girls since...

Your monster turtle dong would kill them... based on your previous reference... of course! I totally did not google Turtle Penis.

He totally did...

Spike! How about less snark and more clip rolling?

Whoa, dude! Low blow! We don't talk about Oprah, no no no... There's Jennika, but right now she's a vagitarian. There's Venus who may or may not be my sister... I'm still trying to figure out the logistics of Raph and Alopex or Raph and Mona Lisa... depends on which continuity we're referencing.

Yikes! But, back on topic: You say, you want to end the feud, let's say, the feud ends tomorrow in a peaceful manner, what are Hamato Michelangelo's plans after the war?

Oh Jeez, dude! I was expecting that question, but it still caught me off-guard. It's the reason why I'm fighting, you know.... Arts... it's what motivates me. Like my namesake, I want to explore, painting, sculpting, you know, arts! Maybe music and voice acting, since being a 5'1" Turtle can make finding normal acting jobs more difficult. If humanity's attitude towards mutants change, I might even go to college and get a degree... probably in Humanities and of course enjoy some frat parties while I'm at it!

Ah, Humanities, the impractical degrees! As a fellow student of Humanities, I should advise you to get a minor in something practical,  otherwise your degree will net you retail jobs... also, Graphic Designers are a dime a dozen. Now, we danced around the main issue, but touched it barely... What's the deal with April?

Dude, again, it depends on continuity... sometimes she's a 20-something MILF, sometimes she's like our sister from another species, and sometimes she's a sista from another mista...

But have you guys... you know...

Duuude only on R34 continuity! Or the Neftyverse... normally we're great friends! And in most continuities she sticks to her own species... much to my chagrin... Raph and Donnie aren't too fond of that either...

As much fun as I had today, Mike, I guess this is where we have to cut this interview short, since Spike is either making an interpretative dance, or the Network bosses aren't happy about my choice of topics. Next time Join me as we interview Lion-O from Thundercats Roar!! Like hell, we are! Mike. Let's finish this with style...

With style dude? Cowabunga!! Booyakasha!! 

Aw dammit!

Aug 9, 2022

The Spot will be the villain to the Spider-verse sequel: a Marvel Legends rant.

 It's really good that an obscure villain like The Spot is getting some love... what worries me is that this might mean the only Marvel Legends figure of The Spot might be movie based and not Comic Book accurate. Yes, I know it's old news that The Spot was going to be the villain of that movie, but the realization that we might not get a proper Spot figure hit me just now...

And I'm going to use the Spot as an excuse to make a Spider-Man character Wishlist that removes Agony and Riot, since they got made as an Amazon exclusive with a Venom figure that comes with a half-Eddie half-Venom face.

Venom: The Madness
I know that Marvel Select did a Modular Venom with The Madness as a set of accessories. Using the Monster Venom/Deluxe big chunky Venom Body with a new Back piece and new biceps, a Madness Venom could be made. (Also that mold gets its 4th reuse or is it 5th?)

90s Kaine
I will keep asking for 90s Kaine until we get him, but I will not harass any Hasbro executives to get him... totally not a Snyderverse reference... my mom's name is not Martha. But seriously, We have Spider-Ben, we have Scarlet Spider... just give us a 90s Kaine and we'd have the Parker Brothers...

Spidercide:
He can easily use a Venom Body with a few changes...

Spider-Man: Beyond:
Before I ask for things like Chasm, who I'm not exactly a fan of, but since it is Ben Reilly, I must root for a figure of him. I think a figure of the Short-lived Beyond series would be nice to celebrate Ben Reilly before Marvel raped him.

Ben Reilly:
This is a creative mix and match figure. Using the suit body without tie torso and the JJJ arms and the Ben Reilly head (new neckpeg might be required) but this one is better suited for a 2-pack. Perhaps with a Green Goblin to recreate Spider-Man v1 issue 75...

Spider-Girl vs Brand New May 2-pack:
Yes this is an excuse to use the new pieces like double hinged elbows on a Spider-girl body. The reason I chose Spider-girl vs Spider-girl blue instead of Mayhem because of parts sharing and that Mayhem can be its own release.
The accessories would be the usual hands for both (punch, webshooting, wall crawling) for April, a set of Symbiote hands.
May gets an unmasked head with her later appearances longer hair, while April gets a Symbiote head with her hair flared out and an april head.

Spiderling 2-pack:
This 2 pack is meant to be a complement to the Spider-Man and Spinneret 2 pack. The kid Spiderling body could be reused on a Valeria Richards or a Gabby Kinney. The teen Spiderling could be the same body as Spider-girl (with the new double jointed elbows I mentioned earlier)

I think that covers all for Symbiotes and Spiders... this time I won't mention Mattie Franklin, because this list is already way too Spider-Heavy.

Doctor Octopus II:
I am referring to Carolyn Trainer. I'd prefer her 90s look, but I wouldn't mind her current look.

The Spot: (616 or SM TAS)
If it wasn't for The Spot, this rant wouldn't exist, so he DESERVES THIS SPOT... pun not intended.
He's mostly a repaint of existing figures, perhaps having a second head where a fist could be plugged in might plus up the figure. Of course this would require a portal spot that can be plugged to another figure's arm... (namely Spider-Man's).

Alistair Smythe The Ultimate Spider Slayer:
I'm going to commit blasphemy here and say that I'd prefer the Spider-Man TAS version over the comic book version.

Carrion:
The final member of Carnage's "Family" from Maximum Carnage. Nearly all the pieces to make him are available.

Shathra:
Since we have Morlun, it makes sense that we get the second Totemistic threat. 

Morbius: (TAS Version)
It's Morbin' time. All he really needs is a new head, since most of his other parts are available.


Carlyle Calamari:
While he might require some new parts, he's an interesting character from a toyetic perspective.

Digger:
Zombie Mobster Legion type of creature sounds interesting on paper. I guess they could use the Sandman BaF legs and then a new Zombified Torso, head and arms...  lends himself for a BaF in a Spidey themed wave.

Enforcers 3 pack:
Fancy Dan could reuse some Logan parts, Montana a modified Suit Body and ox could use a modified version of the Luke Cage body. 

Will O' the Wisp:
Another easy to make Classic Spidey Villain. Aside the head, they pretty much haave everything.

Molten Man:
The MCU version vas OK-ISH, but still, we need a Classic Looking version of him. 

Chameleon (TAS):
Comic Book Chameleon was a bit hard to find due to people buying multiples for Hammerhead and JJJ. Spidey retro waves could fix that by releasing Chameleon based on his Spider-Man TAS look. Added incentive, TAS Peter Parker head.

Joe Robertson:
We have JJJ, so getting Robbie makes sense. If not for JJJ, Tombstone can work with him.