I ♥ Zack Snyder and the Snyderverse

 Any one who disrespects the genius of Zack Snyder is a smooth brained MCU whore. Zack Snyder understands Superman much better than those schmucks Jerry Siegel and Joe Schuster. Even Bob Kane and Bill Finger are hacks next to our savior Zack, Batman expert. Only Zack Snyder is the worthy heir to the kingdom of Detective Comics Comics. I mean look at that putz Christopher Reeve with his lame ass Superman who doesn't know pants go over the underpants... His Clark Kent was a complete goofball. Or that Hot Topic poser Tim Burton who only got the darkness of Batman right, but then ruined it with jokes and gimp suits. Don't get me started on the horribly gay Batman by Schumacher... not knocking the gays, but his batman was so gay that Elton John and Liberace look masculine next to him. Also, stupid and dumbass jokes.... credit card, what a maroon!

Nolan was almost decent and would've been better if his name was Zack Snyder. He had a stupid throat cancer Batman who couldn't kick a toddler's ass. If it wasn't for Lucius the "Magical Negro" Fox, Nolan's Batman wouldn't have gotten anywhere. After years of shit movies that made Marvel look almost good, we were rocked by a hurricane called Zack Snyder... A man with a vision as deeo as the ocean, who understood that Superman is a character who should be full of pathos, brooding, staring menacingly at people like some sort of external gazer. None of that being a nice guy, happy, hopeful, or heroic. Maybe they should just die...

But we should be grateful that our ears and eyes were blessed by a deconstruction of Superman as the building blocks of a fledgling cinematic universe. Only to subvert our expectations in the most Rian Johnson way this side of The Last Jedi by Killing Superman in his second out of his 5 movie grand opus. A clash of two opposong titans:

One is a brooding and jaded individual who stares at the world and sees hatred. The other is a brooding and jaded individual who stares at the world and sees hatred, but his only superpower is money. And this Titanic battle among these completely unevenly matched individuals is resolved because both of their moms are called Martha. 

Not to mention that instead of wasting time on explaining who Cyborg, Aquaman, Flash, and Wonder Woman are in individual films telling us their origin stories,  we get neat, concise power point presentations that give us an abridged idea who they are. If you want detailed explanations, read a wiki, you dingus! Our savior Zack Snyder doesn't have to explain everything to you. But don't rely on your comic book knowledge either, because Zack can and will change things to make them better! Like Robin's death, which made Batman darker... no one liked that little shit, Jason Todd,  so our savior Zack Snyder decided in his infinite wisdom to have Dick die instead. Why waste time in a Flash origin when we have so much more important things to deal with like Secret Agent James Olsen and Luthor's masterpiece plan of using LexCorp patented tech to frame Superman... or a jar of piss.

And there lies the beauty of God Emperor Zack Snyder!! He doesn't HAVE TO SHOW OR TELL YOU SOMETHING IN THE MOVIE! What matters is what's INSIDE ZACK'S HEAD!! He will tell you later on an interview or a vero post. His artistry is not limited to celluloid. You don't NEED COLOR TO FEEL... 

The so-called Plotholes are just MCUTurds trying to grasp at straws with their lack of Vision... I mean how stupid are they that they get excited for a show about sidekicks.

Meanwhile us, REAL Comic book fans have raging boners over a woman sniffing Aquaman's shirt, Iris having a floating weiner near her face as Barry caresses her hair as she flies to her death by a truck driver emulating how John Wesley Shipp's character died in Dawson's Creek. You see that MCUTurds? That's how you pay tribute to past (lame) versions of characters. Not like that hack Josh Wheaton who added a twisted version of the (shitty) Christopher Reeve Superman theme to tell that something was wrong with Superman. 

Having Martian Manhunter appear in the movie, showing that he's on Earth shows Zack's big and sexy brain working like Batman by having a contingency plan in case the League couldn't revive Superman. MM didn't show up to the big battle because he was protecting the Key... duh! 

Pure fucking GENIUS!!

Y'all know this is a joke due to today, the day I wrote this, not the date you read it, is April Fools 2021. Fuck Zack Snyder, Fuck the Snyderverse, and Fuck WB for mishandling the DC Universe!!