Open Letter to Miley Cyrus

Dear Miley:

I know you will not read this, but I need to vent. Yes, most of the times I write posts about you are done in a semi-satirical way. Picking on your craziest moments that get publicized on TV.
Last Sunday's performance at the MTV Video Music Awards was sad, pathetic and desperate.

I get it, you get it, I think everyone in the world gets it. YOU ARE NOT HANNAH MONTANA!!
For years you've been trying to distance yourself from the wig-wearing Disney Channel Pop Princess.
Problem is that you've BEEN TRYING TOO HARD!! Instead of looking more mature and sophisticated than the Artificial Disney Product; you end up looking Trashy. There is one thing that you need to accept: The Ghost of Hannah Montana will haunt you for a long time. The more you struggle, the more it will come back and bite you in the ass (metaphorically speaking). You are not the first one who has gone through this and you'll not be the last one.

Look at Dustin Diamond: Porn video, ending up on a VH1 Reality show, being a douchebag in general and he can't still get rid of

Screech Powers... 13 years later and people still call him Screech!

Sam J. Jones: Bodyguard, Security industry Professional...

better known as Flash Gordon. 33 Years later and he can't still get rid of that.

(Then again, he learned to embrace it)

Hannah Montana ended about 2 years ago. Hannah is still fresh in many people's memories. There is still Hannah Montana Merchandise being sold. While this is out of your control, YOU are supposed to be under your control. Sadly, it seems that you're not in control of yourself. Now I'm not saying that you should have stayed Hannah Montana Forever (no pun intended) just that you should have done a smoother transition.

Let's start with the Tongue. Just stop it. It's not cute, cool, sexy or badass. It makes you look trashy.
Then there's the whole...white trash slutty act. If the message that you wanted to send is "I'm not 12 anymore, I'm an adult now" I have terrible news for you. IT DID NOT WORK!
Slutting it up does not equal sexy. Groping teddy bears, "masturbating" with a foam finger, using it as a phallic symbol and trying to conceive Beetlejuice's child on stage is not sexy. This jarring transition is what is making people dislike you.

You need to find a middle ground...

I'm not sure if you're trying to emulate Britney Spears, but she's not exactly the best role model ever... Though her transition worked WAY Better than yours. Then again, her transition act was called the same thing as people are calling yours. (give it 10 years and people will possibly say that your Bear humping disaster wasn't that much of a disaster) which brings me back to the Ghost of Hannah Montana. After donning the wig, you became a role model, whether you like it or not. Younger girls still look up to you. You may not like it, but your Destiny IS tied to Hannah Montana Forever!! (again, no pun intended)

While you can't turn back time and redo this and perhaps transition to an "adult" in a not so crass, tasteless and "in your face" way, you can dial it down a few notches. Many people enjoy every time you make a fool out of yourself. I should love it too, cause it gives me a LOT of Material for me to rant about. Especially since your antics are apparently following the recipe for a trainwreck.

While my words will fall in deaf ears, mostly because you won't read them. If you do, then they'll be ignored because I'm a "Hater". I'm a former fan, not a hater. These childish, "look at me I'm a grown up!" antics were the ones that keep me away. "Your people" may be feeding you BS about how wonderful that was. Their heads are so far up your ass that they know what you ate this morning.
While you need to stay relevant, there is no need to go to these extremes. You NEED to hear the bad as well as the good.

I wish you the best, but you need to step up and clean up your act. More Mature doesn't need to be smutty.
Sincerely,
Nefty
a Former fan!