Jun 14, 2015

It came from the Toy Chest F-You Joe Quesada!

I rarely say that I hate people and REALLY MEAN IT, but Joe Quesada is an exception. Joe Quesada is a douchebag who has too much power in Marvel and screwed everything up for Peter Parker. Joe Quesada is the moron behind One More Day, among other bad choices made in Marvel... He may have done some good, but MANDATING that Mr. Great Power/Great Responsibility had to make a highly irresponsible deal with the devil in order to annul his marriage to Mary Jane and become a perennial loser living with Aunt May is DAMN HORRIBLE! I'm talking Uwe Boll levels of HORRIBLE! He deserves to have rotten eggs broken inside his shoes. someone to pee and take a dump on his cornflakes. have him take a shower with raw sewage, and replace his toothpaste with hemorrhoid cream. Also that may the fleas of a thousand camels infest his nose hairs. Heh... Looks like I've Mellowed out with age.

So, I bought another Spider-Man related Marvel Legends figure (I thought I had quit this line when MOTUC started) I'm talking about the Marvel Legend figure from the Little MC2 Comic that could...
Spider-Girl: Daughter of Spider-Man and Mary Jane Watson! That's why I got her, because the MC2 was a huge F-You to Jokesada.

Let's take a crack at Spider-Girl from the Hobknocker wave...

Paint and Sculpt:
Painted Weblines... I hate those. In a few years they'll fade away if displayed in action dioramas...
I also have sloppy paint splotches on her left foot... BOO!!
Sculptwise, she looks nice, but with a smooth body for reuse with other characters... I guess I'm in the minority, but I prefer Etched Web lines on Spidey figures. She kinda looks like a Teenage Girl wearing a slightly modified Ben Reilly Spider-Man Suit.
Due to the sloppy paints and not as detailed sculpt she gets a 3.0

She has Hobknocker crap that I don't care about. 3.0 Now, I know that NORMALLY, Marvel Legends figures do not come with accessories, but in this day and age, not having accessories (or at least Extra hands so it doesn't look like May is shooting webs all the time. (There's a Spidey figure on this wave with extra hands, pizza and a partly unmasked face to eat said pizza) Heck maybe some WEBBING would have helped spice her up a little bit.
I'm saving the worst for last:
She has similar Articulation to Black Cat, except the head has a bit more range. That brings me to my main issue with the Articulation:
A Character as flexible a Spider-Man, or in this case Spider-Girl deserves a figure with ENOUGH Articulation to DO WHATEVER A SPIDER-CAN!! Something that MAY DAY PARKER CANNOT DO. I tested TWO traditional Spidey Poses and May Failed MISERABLY... One looks like she is pleasuring herself and the other looks like she is showing off her Spider-Butt. Her legs pop off if you try to do wider stances, making her leg articulation NEARLY USELESS!! 2.0

May gets a 2.67 as her final score. This is REALLY BAD for a figure that is supposed to be as amazing as her daddy. Hell! even the lame figure of Clone Daddy is leagues and bounds better than May! (Can't wait to get Scarlet Spider from the Rhino wave. He at least has Extra hands!) The figure is a disappointment. Black Cat was swinging the pendulum towards returning to ML once MOTUC was over, but May swung it back all the way to "Fuhgettaboutit! No ML for me!" I don;t care about this design of Hobgoblin, but I bought May more for what she stands for than what she actually is... I am almost tempted to get 2099 and Anti Venom as nods to Edge of time. Liked the story, hated the game...

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