Another Miami Vice movie!?

 Jesus Tittyfucking Christ! Who's in this?

Austin Butler and Michael B. Jordan. Movie has 3 writers that's never a good sign.

There better be jai alai.

I'm honestly not too sure if this will rock or suck, but it's screaming to me, wait until streaming.

Street Fighter 2nd Trailer

 Has Dan, Zangief, Dhalsim stretching, E.Honda and hints of Evil Ryu.

Holy shit! We have another Masters of the Universe here... there I said it. Won't be Assassin's Fist good but better than the 94 movie Minus Raúl Juliá. Also, trailer was relased on a Tuesday.

Extended Blu-Ray release of MOTU: 1987

 I barely a week until the release of the New He-Man movie, we get the following announcement: 2 Disc 4K and Blu-ray of Masters of the Universe, WITH AN EXTENDED CUT.

I dunno when, but this sounds exciting...

I honestly can't believe the new movie is so close...

Mattel is hitting a new high with a He-Man Guiness record

 The movie hasn't come out yet and it has a Guinness book record  sure, it's about drones and being brightest... but it's a He-Man thing, so I have to talk about it.

Like Holy Shiiiiiiiiiiit! He-Man related Guinness world record. 

The only sad thing about this is that Mom isn't here to see it... less than 2 weeks. 

Apparently the MOTU Popcorn buckets and drink holders are off the wall.

 And most definitely won't be available in my neck of the woods:

Yeah... I fucking hate that I can't have these...

But month and a half... Shame that Mom isn't here to see this... the Power Sword drink holder... By the Power of Grey Goose, I have Cirrhosis!!

Odds and ends: Mr. Feeny is 99 and stuff

 This means that William Daniels, voice of Knight Industries Two Thousand and permanent mentor to Corey Matthews has reached the age limit to use LEGO bricks.

Congratulations Mr. Daniels. I hope you spent a happy birthday with your family. I would also love to thank you once again for inspiring me to be a better person.

You have no idea how many lives your performance as George Feeny changed lives. 

Just to have some KITT representation...

I'm doing the side quests for Final Fantasy XII... 

That RNG can be a bitch in order to get that rare game... don't get me started with the Sochen cave puzzles. The game actively hates players.

Trail-or is here. They did the Cringer on the MGM logo.

It looks pretty nice, actually. Even Leto isn't Letoing it too much. 

Also, my first non-gooner statue for figures... got it the night before my birthday. Kinda fots with my torn clothes She-Ra. This may sound gay, but I kinda wish there was a He-Man statue with his Bonor out...to fit with my gooner statue collection for figures 

Val Kilmer will return from the dead

 As AI slop. Due to his throat cancer, his voice was AI in Top Gun Maverick... well now, Batman Forever will be AI.

As Deep as the Grave is the movie that will have a Clankerized Kilmer. Sure they have his estate's approval, but still how long until we get James Dean, Clark Gable, Shirley Temple, and other long gone folks brought back by clankers?

Whee is Crispin Glover when you need him.

Bloodsport is getting a remake.

Yeah... I dunno how I feel about this other than Nope!! 

The director played a Resistance Monitor in The Last Jedi. This would be her third directorial work. I have little faith on this project. Trying to remake the 38 year old movie might be tougher than expected, since it's based on "real life events". The quotation marks are added because Frank Dux is not exactly a reliable narrator. Honestly, it would be far easier to remake Seagal movies.

By the power of Grayskull, I have a boner

 This might actually Not Suck!!

While yeah, the trailer seems to be "generic" and may hint that He-Man may not be too much in it. It made me feel genuinely excited for a Masters of the Universe movie... which trailers are supposed to do.

I'm still keeping my expectations low. Shit movies have had good trailers. Look at everything Zack Snyder has made.

We'll see how this goes in June.

Mattel, we better get Masterverse styled figures of these.I want an Adam Glenn figure.

Trailer tomorrow...

 It's finally happening. MOTU movie trailer tomorrow. I got some stills that were corroborated by Jukka Issakainen, MOTU connoisseur and I believe he was working a book on the 200X MOTU. He worked on other books as well. I believe the MOTU newspaper strips and comics anthologies.

Habemus Grayskull...

Llegoooooó el bigoooooooooteeeeeee!!

Arigato ja nai Mrs. Roboto.

What's that Next to Riverdale Teela?

Motherfucking Cringer and he big...

Right now two things bother me:

1. Planet Earth
2. Cult leader and alleged pedophile, Jared Leto 

So, MOTU Fans pray to your god(s) that this movie doesn't suck, despite Leto being in it.

Aw hell naw... a SEVENTH!? Sharknado?

 What the actual fuck? There are 7 of these? How the fuck is this possible?

Did you know Sharknado had a videogame? I didn't... it's a subway surfers type game.

That's it I'm done with the internet for today! 

Toy Story 5 teaser: Somehow Woody Returned

 I honestly don't think that I'll see this on theaters. 

I already stated ladt year that I wasn't going to watch it on theaters

In any case that's the teaser for soulless cashgrab. Toy Story will be 31 years old When Toy Story 6 comes out.

Gizmo is coming bacl

 Warner announced that 2027 will be the return of Gremlins to the big screen. I honestly don't know how to feel. Is it a reboot? A sequel?

I mean it's not like the gremlins have been whored out or anything

Well 2027...

Snake Mountain teased

 Alleged Pedophile Jared Leto has a new home. The MOTU Movie team has revealed some Snake Mountain concept art.

Oh holy crap this looks cool... this is giving me false hopes for the movie, which I know it's gonna suck.What's still i'm gonna watch at theaters.

Noah Centineo as Ken is giving me mixed vibes

 This pic has been making the rounds.

He captures the essence of Ken... then I remember that Akuma is Roman Reigns... and all my excitement gets killed.

They're currently filming in Australia. For some reason, I'm getting street fighter 94 vibes in a it's gonna be a bad movie but not Legend of Chun Li bad...

Also, this movie lacks Pedro Pascal.

The way they're combining characters.This is gonna be a different canon. Also , this can has a street fighter V vibe to him.

First official MOTU pic...

 It's He-Man...

Riding Battle Cat... that's it... the movie might suck donkey dick, but it'll have He-Man riding Battle Cat on the big screen... duuuuuuude! This is freaking huge. Wonder when will the trailer come out...

The only thing I hate is that Mom isn't here to see it with me.

TMNT 35th Anniversary edition

 It apparently played on the 17th and 20th In the US... things like these rarely happen in Puerto Rico...

Well, color me Surprised... If this is True, guess what I'll be doing on Monday evening!?

• Wake up
• Shower
• Brush my teeth
• Eat breakfast
• Get dressed
• Drive to the nearest theater
• Watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 
• Return home
• Order Domino's 
• Eat said Pizza
• Ask my old man for a Ninja Turtles figure.

Oh no, my Old Man isn't dead. It's just that our relationship works better with him doing his own thing and not being reminded on the failure that is his genetic dead end son. Meanwhile, I can pretend to act like a functional adult without getting a daily reminder how much of a failure I am, because I'm well aware of how much my life sucks and how awful I am for being against of passing off my accursed genes.

It's a win-win for everyone. 

I get to forget how much my life sucks by using a bit of nostalgia. Fuck! He just texted me.

Literally, to let me know about this movie.

Fuckdammit! I'm now crying. Won't post the text, but a loose translated summary:

Son:

We don't get along, because we butt heads too much. But I know that you never outgrew He-Man and the Turtles. You probably know this already, but they're going to show the original movie we watched when you were a kid. If you didn't, then showings start tomorrow. 

God Bless You.

It fucking pisses me off! Because now I look irrational for holding on to my grudge. But every time we try to reconcile issues arise and sooner or later we're butting heads. It's one step forwards and two steps back. So the best way to win is to not play, but now I sound unhinged.

Pizza Hut has superb evenly slicing skills. That was my $2 personal pizza from Tuesday. 

Update:

March 2026:

Yes, Secret of the Ooze is getting rereleased.

Zack Snyder is coming...

 To theaters. He'll soon begin filming a project he's been trying to make since the mid 00s. That's roughly 20 years. Apparently, it's a passion project. The movie is called The Last Photograph.

The story, according to the producers, is thus: “An ex-DEA operative must return to the mountains of South America in an effort to find his missing niece and nephew, following the brutal murders of their diplomat parents. Enlisting the help of a washed-up junkie war photographer, the only person to have seen the face of the killers, he sets out, determined to find the children and the truth, but soon learns he must also face the ghosts of his past. Their journey into the unknown takes them further and further away from civilization, bringing into question everything they believe, while slowly eroding the distinction between real and surreal.”

Not gonna lie, it sounds REALLY GOOD. But at the same time, this is the TEMU Michael Bay that thinks he's the next Stanley Kubrick... The less competent Hideo Kojima of movies. My biggest fear will be the "Snyderisms" Dark muddy pallette, slow motion abuse, shots framed like a perfume commercial, and an excuse to play this:

And whining about producers getting in the way of his creativity and needing a 4 hour "Snydercut" keep in mind that Snyder uses the main producer as a sheath for the Snydercock. What I just crassly said is his wife is the producer.

I hope this project goes well for him. He's been nearly 10 years relegated to Direct to Streaming... which puts him at the same level as товарищ Сигал, Putin's besto frendo. Something that a certain person cannot say.

Random thoughts:

 So, Garou Densetsu: City of Wolves is deader than dead. Probably has to do with the lack of polish and obsession with pleasing the Arabian Prince than making a GREAT game to Rival SF6. Still, they could get some money back via Merchandising. I know they're letting Storm Collectibles do KOF 98 stuff on their normal and Arena lines. 

Maybe they could push for a City of Wolves sub line to rehype the game? I would even buy a Ronaldo just to make fun of him... I've bought much better historical figures to make fun of.  An overrated soccer player wouldn't be that huge. 

What the Actual Fuck!? The MOTU Movie not only got race swaps, but now GENDER SWAPS!?

Well, Roboto is now going to be played by The Joe Schmo Show's Kristen Wiig.

I feel like Mattel is trying to be shitty on purpose... just to piss me off, is what I would've said if the Purple Gimp was still around.

I will still watch it because MOTU, but I strongly believe that Rebel Moon 1 & 2 Snydercuts would be a better experience.

I am disappointed in Hasbro and their Maximum Series Hulk. I called it...

The $60 + shipping, handling and Taxes Maximum Series Hulk... is breaking at the torso. GEEK ENTERTAINMENT NETWORK brought this to my attention and Damn that was fast. I was expecting this to be a 2027 thing... not a, checks notes. Four months after release. I knew I had a bad feeling about this figure, but damn! This worries me because of

Shuma Gorath... sorry Gargantos!

What comes before first blood?

 Noah Centineo will give us that answer. He will be playing a young John Rambo in a prequel to First Blood.

Why would we get a Rambo Prequel?

I mean it would be yet another Vietnam war movie. Or will this movie be before he enters the war... so many questions, but I think I'll read the Wikipedia entry when it comes out. 

But at least it's not an adapted to modern times Rambo with an Iraqi Freedom era neoRambo. But that's the thing... Rambo is a product of its time. We already saw what we could see from him. A prequel would be a double edged sword.

The prequel could flesh out Rambo, but it could also change things to a point that could damage the storyline. Just as Rambo living changed the character from the book into a tool of American jingoism. But, the problem is that we'd have current year writers working on an icon from a dofferent era with different cultural sensitivities.

It's a long road and the chance of fuck ups are lots. 

What's next E.T. sequel/reboot?

Street Figter Movie may have its Balrog... apparently it's Bulletproof

 Or 50-Cent. I just had to reference his PS2 and XBox game. I already mentioned that other actors have been eyed for roles. There isn't much to say about this. I mean, 50-Cent as Balrog isn't that horrible of an idea. It's not like they chose a scrawny actress for Chun Li...

This is Kristine Kreuk all over again... that's  Callina Liang, another scrawny Canadian Actress playing Chun Li. She's got more of a Cammy, Karin, or Sakura physique than Chun Li...

2026 is looking like a year of sucky adaptations of things I love.