Action figures, Movies, Games, TV shows, things I like, Things I hate, weird news old or recent... they're fair game for my rants.
DISCLAIMER: OPINIONS POSTED ARE EXAGGERATED FOR COMEDIC EFFECT!! Got it?
The cringiest Halle Berry line ever.
Sadly I couldn't find any clips of the Animated Series storm yelling at nature.
But storm is a mutant who can control the weather considered a goddess in Africa and was all "Wakanda for a little while" .
Did I mention she's one of the more popular X-Men?
TBStorm: Oh No! I'm getting replaced! Mohawk Storm: At least he DISPLAYED YOU! He bought me for the BAF!!
While I love the vintage style packaging I hate to open it because it's not collector friendly. It gave me a nostalgic science back when KB was still around and the toy Biz Marvel figures were like three for ten bucks. not to mention playing with our Marvel action figures at my friend Johnny's house when we were allegedly" too old to be playing with action figures". those were simpler times and this figure's packaging reminds me of that time. Now I want some Dunkaroos, Amazin Fruit gummy bears and a tall glass of ice cold Crystal Pepsi. And no Johnny I will not listen to Mariah Carey.
Articulation
Incredibly enough the Cape is not as problematic as I thought. it looks very retro and very crappy, but it's not the biggest issue with the articulation. Her shoulder pads are the issue. If you are too wild with her for sing you can accidentally pop her shoulder pads off and her cape will fall off as well.
Other than that she's got standard female Marvel Legends articulation.
4.0
Paint and sculpt:
Her proportions are far better than the toybiz Storm. I only wish her Cape was similar to the ToyBiz figure.
While are articulation is better hidden by the sculpt I kind of like the sculpt on the toy Biz figure better. This is making it a bit too hard to judge Storm on her own merits.
Same two lightning bolts we've seen a million times. Good thing I bought that extra toy biz Storm from eBay. I can use the stand it came with for her and with the lightning... Oh myyy!
4.0 Again she needed a little oomph! but we didn't get it
Taste my lightning, @#$%ers!!
Overall 4.0 is her final score. it feels like she has adequate but not great. But here's the thing: Cyclops, Wolverine, Rogue, Storm, Beast, Gambit, Jubilee, Jean Grey, and Professor X...
If you're not hearing the song in your head, you suck!
The only toy this thing in my display is BEAST's head.
Dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun wood wood wood wood wood wood nana nana nana nana... Man making the theme in onomatopeia mode sucks ass!
Unicron is about $600 while Cookie Monster was about $300. Both campaigns were made at the same time. While the number of Transformers and Sesame Street fans might be pretty small it still is Hasbro competing Against Hasbro.
That's not mentioning all the new product that has been hitting the stores right now especially their limited edition 80th anniversary Marvel Legends figures. Don't get me started on Takara TOMY Masterpiece Transformers.
The lack of a payment plan didn't help Cookie Monster or Unicron. But I believe Unicron will make it with this extra month. In my opinion Hasbro needs to space these haslab projects a bit better. Barely a month and asking $300 or $600 is a bit too much.
But seriously why in the hell Cookie Monster? I know he's an old-school favorite but still why? At least it's not a 600 life-size Bert and Ernie because we all know what everyone's going to do with them or to them...
In any case, if you want Unicron, go for him... and Snake Mountain is rumored to be delayed until June according to people who got it via Entertainment Earth... no official word from Super7 or if this delay is a CYA move by EE.
I KNOW Mattel says that MOTUC is going to remain dormant for a "little while"... meaning
But it doesn't have to be. We have seen how Hasbro released Marvel Legends that are exclusive to Amazon like the Jim Lee Magneto with Scarlet Witch and Quicksilver or the Alpha Flight pack.
So, why not release a couple of two packs Via Amazon to "keep the adult collectible line alive".
For example: Battleground Fisto vs Battleground Beastman. This gives people a second chance to get a variation of hard-to-get Classics figures.
Theoretically speaking Fisto would require zero new tooling since The Fisto figure has all the pieces to make a 200X Fisto. All we'd need is the long loincloth and Icer boots. Beastman on the other hand would require new Shins and maybe a new whip.
Or maybe the two packs could be an old figure variant and that new figure like say:
Galactic protector Snout Spout versus Butt-head.
GP Snout Spout can reuse a couple of "Mech parts" (Blast attack arms, extendar thighs, NA Skeletor boots, the 200X head and normal Snout Spout armor and ax on the Hordak Torso.)
But Logistics and Mattel shenanigans are what won't let this happen.
I know that reboot is a very nasty word, but hear me out. Right now, SONY needs to raze everything and start from scratch. Tom Holland is unfortunately tainted by the MCU and to keep going with his story as if everything else never happened is a moronic move.
Scratch the Venom, Morbius, and other dumbass live action Spider-Man relates movies without Spider-Man. Tabula rasa and all that.
Back to basics:
A college aged Peter Parker who has been Spidey for a couple of years is a nice way to start. I would literally start the movie with narration similar to that of Tobey's in the original Spider-Man. You know the whole "who am I you sure what you want to know' speech with Peter standing at Uncle Ben's Grave. Peter would basically give us a recap of what he's been doing these last three years as he vents with Uncle Ben. He tried to use his powers for personal gain, it backfired with great power and also must come a great responsibility and all that. With Spider-Man stopping normal crimes in New York, criminals are upping their game with some new technology. Basically it's a reference to shocker and The Thinker. Here Shocker wouldn't be a big player, mostly comedic relief.
Retreading some of the past:
Unfortunately Oscorp would have to be a big player in this universe. I would borrow from the insomniac games the idea that Octavius and Osborn created the company. While Norman was the face of the company, due to his better people skills than Otto, Octavius oversaw the Technology branch. He did this in hopes of finding a cure for his degenerative disease through robotics. Hos colleagues include:
-Alistair Alphonso Smythe, the wunderkind son of the late Spencer Smythe, who died in an accident involving Spider-Man, J. Jonah Jameson, and an experimental drone that could track Spider-Man's unique genetic signature.
-Quentin Beck, Originally, a Stuntman/SFX coordinator on a Children's action program with a knack for robotics and hard light hologram tech, earned a spot on Otto's team for his lateral thinking and multiple applications for his tech.
-Phineas Mason, nicknamed the Tinkerer, is the team's main fabricator. Unbeknownst to Otto, Mason has been leaking Oscorp secrets to the black market and is the source of the new tech criminals are using... thanks to a Mysterious Benefactor.
Norman oversaw the Biomedical division. Key members of the division include:
-Michael Morbius: An Eastern European scientist whose work is one of the pillars of theoretical neogenic disease treatment. (Due to the shady ethical and moral implications of the process, so far it has remained in theoretical stages, legally speaking. This is one of Osborn's black projects) Morbius has a personal stake in the project due to him contracting a rare and deadly blood disease that already took the life of Emily Osborn, Norman's wife.
-Curtis Connors: A former war medic, who lost an arm in combat. His research on Herpetology and Neogenic disease treatment made him an asset to Oscorp. He moonlights as an Advanced Biology professor at ESU. (This allows Connors to do some work away from "Storming Norman".
-Farley Stillwell: The final pillar of the Neogenics project:
He built the first Neogenic recombinator with Drs: Morbius and Connors a few years ago. It was believed to be a failure by Norman, who fired Stillwell. What they didn't know is that it actually worked and it had accidentally altered a Spider, that bit Peter Parker.
Stillwell would create The Scorpion as a way to retaliate against Norman for firing him.
-Miles Warren: A genetics professor whose specialty was cloning. He had found a way to make accelerated clones, but these clones barely lasted weeks or months, due to their accelerated aging. Warren moonlights as an ESU Genetics Professor where he finds ways to obtain genetic material from female students to clone and satisfy his carnal desires.
The idea is to have a way to set up characters in a semi plausible way. (Too much of a coincidence that many characters are tied to Oscorp... well, since Spidey has been removed from the MCU, I've no access to AIM, Roxxon, Stark, SHIELD, etc. So I have to improvise.
The idea is to set up Stillwell and Tinkerer as the "main unrelated villains" in this first movie, while Scorpion is the "filler". Stillwell's revenge on Osborn via Scorpion is plotline A. Plotline B involves Otto discovering Tinkerer's betrayal and nearly dying for it. (Tinkerer sabotaged The neural interface of Otto's "arms" which causes the birth of Doctor Octopus for Spidey 2)
Norman is not to be seen in this movie. He exists and is a Threat from behind the shadows. I'm aware that this kinda feels like retreading the "Amazing reboot" and the insomniac games Spidey. It kinda is to an extent.
The idea is to "create a Spiderverse" with Spider-Man movies AND movies based of other characters. For example, having Spidey save a guy that happens to be Hobie Brown, from some gang related problems. This encounter inspires Hobie to get revenge on the gang as a masked vigilante. We get a Prowler movie. Here he would face One of Hammerhead's enforcers, Flint Marko.
I set up BOTH Lizard and Morbius so one can fight Spidey, preferably Morbius, while Lizard gets his solo flick, where Kravinoff is the antagonist.
The idea is to set up phases and goals for Spidey: Phase One: Gauntlet of the Sinister Six
This one is Self Explanatory. It would be an 8 movie phase to set up the Sinister Six 2-part movie. I need to mention that THE REAL SINISTER SIX would be used: I mean:
Ock, Electro, Kraven, Mysterio, Sandman and Vulture.
This would be 2 Spidey movies, 2 Prowler movies, Black Cat movie, and the Gauntlet of the Sinister Six.
Chameleon would be a conmon thread accomodating pieces for Norman and future movies.
Phase Two: Neogenic Nightmare
Morbius, Lizard, Goblin, and Jackal would be the main antagonists.
The Symbiote is introduced as an abandoned cancer treatment suit, whose composition is alien in origin. The 3 scientists working on the project were: Edward Brock Senior, Mary Teresa Fitzpatrick, and Richard Parker.
This combines both traditional and Ultimate Origins.
Since all three of them used their DNA to test the symbiote's capabilities, the symbiote only recognizes them as part of its Codex. Since Peter Parker posseses DNA from 2 out of 3 Codex "hosts", the suit feels more affinity to Peter. The Symbiote will be the cure to the 6 arm affliction.
( my having both morbius and lizard there's no way in hell that I'm not going to do the six Arms Spidey)
Chameleon would be introduced as an actual threat and has been acting as Norman's right hand.
Black suit Spidey's more violent tendencies while battling Norman are what will drive Peter to destroy the Symbiote.
Jackal would be the first post-Symbiote villain. Yes, Spidey will fight his first clone. (If we reach ph4, you can guess what it'll be aboot)
Eddie Jr. Gets the symbiote and Venom begins Phase 3: Maximum Carnage
Brock, now armed with a symbiote and Spider-powers begins hunting down the people who caused his father's death and the death of Parker's parents. The string of deaths caused by "black Spider-Man" force Peter to return to his red and blues (much to Black Cat's chagrin) at the end of the body trails, Peter finds a torn Eddie Brock with the symbiote as he struggles with the symbiote to remain in control. The symbiote wants to bond to Parker, while Eddie needs the symbiote to survive. (I got back the test results, I definitely have cancer!) Peter reluctantly agreed to let Eddie live with the Symbiote, as long as Brock doesn't let it kill more people. Brock moves to San Francisco in order to put as much distance as possible from Spidey.
Spidey and Black Cat team up to take down a Goblin impersonator who's trying to take on the ubderground power vaccuum from Norman's death.
In California, Brock is forced to battle Shriek, a woman that was genetically modified to become an Anti-Venom weapon. The Life Foundation's CEO, Roland Treece was the one behind the assassination of the Parkers and Brock Sr. and not Norman Osborn, as Brock erroneously believed.
During Venom's final fight with Shriek on a Max Sec Prison, dying bits of Venom bond to a prisoner in solitary.
The idea is to finish with a three-parter, Maximum Carnage.
Hobgoblin would be replacing Demogoblin, Doppelganger would be a defective Clone of Spidey, Carrion is a defective clone of Jackal, and we add Shriek and Carnage to the Mix.
On the Heroes side, we have Spidey, Cat, Prowler, Venom, and Morbius
This is of course and off the cough random idea that I had cooking for about an hour...
But in order for this to work, SONY needs to find a figure who could act as a SONY version of Kecin Feige... AND KEEP THE PASCAL/ARAD/SONY involvement to a minimum... otherwise we get:
After the announcement of the Silent Bob MOTU anime, the defenders of Noelle Stevenson's pop cultural appropriations of She-Ra have begun attacking the Silent Bob MOTU anime. CBR's Timothy Donohoo has just shown how much of an idiot he is with this "article".
The article is a fluff piece trying to defend Shit-Reee and the princesses of powder (crushed adderall)
The first point is praising the CalArts inspired art style for the show. Seriously, How mentally challenged do you have to be to say that a soft style ill suited for action and adventure is a positive. Where character designs are androgynous and the only way to identify their sex is by cliched gender signifiers... except boobs, those come and go within seconds. Nearly everyone does CalArts... or CalArts-like. It's a VERY RARE thing to see characters with realistic proportions in action and adventure shows.
The second point is "muh diversity". The idiot literally says that changing character races for inclusivity is a positive...
That making Bow black and son of two dads is a good thing... Meanwhile Nettossa is unused, and reserved as a background prop and at best used as a joke.
Nettossa is the original Black Lesbian coded character.
He then praises that Hordak and Catra got "character development" in Shit-Reee but not in She-Ra.
Two things:
-syndicated series back then required that episodes could be shown in any order, so most episodes had to be self-contained.
-Catra's "development" is literally Jilted psycho ex-girlfriend. Hordak is evil because "he has no fwiends" and he's a defective Clone of Horde Prime.
So basically, the "amazing character development" is literally stating the same thing as Filmation...
Catra is jealous of Adora's rise to power in the Horde, which she discards to rise in power within the Rebels.
Hordak is treated like crap by Horde Prime and wants to step out of his Brother's shadow.
Then Captain numbnuts praises Shit-Reee fpr taking a dump on the mythology and do their thing without being respectful to the lore.
What made me laugh like a madman was attacking New Adventures of He-Man while using 200X imagery, which literally did most of the crap he's praising... while using late 90s stylized art. He then mentions 200X and blames the show's cancellation on it sucking and not Mattel's incompetence with toy distribution or Cartoon Network switching the show through multiple timeslots. Sometimes with no notice. (How can you watch a show is you don't know WHEN it's on)
Wait, it gets even better
"Fans will want to know that the people behind the scenes actually respect the source material, lest the result be something akin to that of the much-maligned Thundercats Roar!"
Thundercats roar does the very same things you praise on Shit-Reee... Also, Noelle Stevenson "creator of Shit-Reee" and voice of "Morbidly Obeserella" and Marcus Scrubber, voice of "Bow" have shown massive disrespect for the original and tools like you praise this shit show.
But seriously, all we have about this new He-Man series is:
Sequel to the original
Anime
Character development, especially Teela
People who grew with the original and have some deal of respect to it are working on it.
There isn't enough material there to crap on the show... unless... it's showcasing Noelle Stevenson's pop cultural appropriations of She-Ra's shortcomings...
By the Google translated reference; you can deduce the items for the review: 80th Colossus vs. Juggernaut 2-pack
Juggernaut: Avatar for Cyttorak on Earth. Nearly indestructible, he's known for being Unstoppable.
Colossus: Piotr Rasputin, farmer, artist, mutant with a resilient metal skin thar enhances his strength and durability.
This two pack is basically a Brawn vs Brawn Match.
Obviously Juggernaut is stronger but Colossus is Tough Enough to slow down the Unstoppable.
Now that I gave you a quick synopsis on who they are let's tackle the figures.
The Juggernaut figure is practically the same figure that I reviewed before. Main differences are color, extra hands and new heads.
Jugg: "Don't you know who I am?"
Kitty:"The Juggernaut bitch, we already know!"
Jugg: "I'm the Juggernaut, bitch!"
Kitty: "That's what I said, you're the Juggernaut bitch!"
Jugg: "I'm the Juggernaut, you're the bitch!"
Kitty:"I'm the bitch? Are you sure about that?
Mr 'I need a magic gem to beat up a cripple'... YOU
ARE THE BITCH, JUGFERNAUT BITCH!"
Articulation
Same as the BAF. His articulation is limited due to mass and weight. 4.0
Jugg: "Where did the bitch go?"
Logan: "Careful, bub! You're squeezing my boys a bit too hard!"
Colossus: "Sorry, Comrade. I'm still not used to the Fastball Special!"
Logan:" Jes' toss me towards dickhead!"
Colossus: "I get it, because his head looks like a circumcized penis!"
Jugg: "Who the hell are you calling dickhead?"
paint and sculpt
From the neck down he's literally the same figure as the previous build a figure Juggernaut. he doesn't come with a belt, but I took the one from the BAF and put it on him.
He's got a brand new helmet that smooth and wider and looks more Juggernaut like.
Paintwise he's very red. Under some lights he looks burgundy, and in others he looks crimson. Great for his armor, bad for his hair. So I may have to repaint it to reduce the bad hairdye job look. 4.5
Colossus: " I must break you..."
Jugg: "That tickles!"
Accessories
Extra grabbing hands
Extra beaten up head
Extra broken helmet
Seems reasonable enough for me. 5.0
Jugg: Who's the Bitch now? Hulk: Rawr!Jugg: Oh crap!
Juggernaut gets a 4.5 as HIS final score. Since he's one half of a two-pack, we need to study Colossus.
Kitty and Colossus: *making out noises*
Logan: "Get a room, you two..."
Jubilee: "You know, that could totally be us!"
Logan: "Nuh-uh! Last time I banged a kid, she ended up
beating Thanos!"
Articulation
For a big guy Colossus is pretty poseable. If I were to nitpick about this figure I would say the legs being pretty weak at holding poses and lack of butterfly joints are the biggest turn-offs on this figure. 4.0
Ryu: "Hadoken!"
Paint and sculpt
While he's not specific to any era, Colossus looks like the idea of Colossus. I absolutely love that he's so shiny. 5.0
Colossus: "Ilyana, come live with me at the X Mansion." Magik: "I have a home!" Colossus: "Pegwarming at Walgreens isn't a home!"
Accessories
Extra hands
There is not much that you can do with Colossus as he is aside from adding heads for different expressions and maybe a bunch more hands... but this is Hasbro not a Japanese company so it's okay for what we get. 4.5
Colossus also gets a 4.5 as his final score.
Overall
The 2 pack gets a 4.5 and let's face it. There isn't much that could've been done to improve on it.
What's this all aboot making Canadian Stereotypes the beginning of a rant, bub?
What's the biggest thing in Marvel's Canada?
That is NOT 5'3" AND STABBY!!
AND NOT DEADPOOL!!
Alpha Flight! With the Wendigo wave Guardian and the Sasquatch BAF, this box set conoletes the Most popular members of the Maple Syrup Avengers... Also, the gayest Superhero this side of Teen Jean brainwashing all the Bobby Drakes into being gay.
Finally after all these years we're getting Northstar! There's still hope for Firestar! (And the Bombastic Bagman)
This set is already available for pre-order it's an Amazon exclusive. $110 for five figures and a mini build a figure.
It's a steal especially since Puck is expensive as hell in the secondary market.
It'll ship in December.
I have to make a connection between the Sony debacle and the Mattel debacle.
Right now Sony and Marvel are debating on how to use Spider-Man and negotiations are going bad...
Mattel is on a similar spot with MOTU (and POP).
In the 90s, after the comic book bubble crashed, Marvel had to sell film rights to various franchises to stay alive.
Sony bought Spider-Man Ghost Rider Daredevil, while 20th Century Fox got X-Men and Fantastic Four, as Universal got Hulk. Now Disney is trying to get their ducks in a row and SONY ain't budging. They want Marvel to do all the work while SONY reaps all the benefits.
Well, Mattel lost a lot of money after getting scammed by Golan-Globus. They sold their cartoon rights to He-Man and She-Ra. Filmation wasn't doing well either and whwn the company went under, the Series library passed through many hands until NBC Universal got a hold of them.
Since the late 90s Mattel has had a couple of chances to snag the cartoon rights back but didn't... Whether they didn't actively pursue them, or did, but didn't want the entire Filmation library is what I don't know. The point is that now He-Man and She-Ra are making a comeback AND if the MOTU movie ends up being a success, then NBCUNIVERSAL will not want to relinquish their rights unless they get a shit ton of money. And despite the show being a giant turd, Shit-Reee has done OK without He-Man.
No matter how we slice it, MOTU fans lose. Kinda like Spidey fans and Sony's tradition of ruining Spider-Man 3...
Wow... I still can't believe that it's been 10 years since this blog started. I've even become persona non grata at Mattel if I'm to believe a certain spiritual guide of playthings. I even had to tell a couple of Tumbrkin defenders of Noelle Stevenson's pop cultural appropriations of She-Ra to buzz-off with their BS... hell, one of them took my Tyrone nickname for faux Bow and is using it as their username...
I have TROLLS!! I must be doing a good thing then. So, speaking of trolls, let's talk Revelations or as I like to call it, the Patriarchy dickslapping Noelle Stevenson's pop cultural appropriations of She-Ra in the face.
I understand that this descriptor is way too (porno)graphic. But it makes sense... In theory, Mattel has taken with He-Man all the precautions to make this right:
-The Showrunner Grew up with the original cartoon, not to mention his background on Superheroes (movies, tv, and comics), and a filmmaker as well.
-Right out of the bat you see reverence for the source material.
-This is a series made FOR FANS of the property.
-a continuation of what came before.
So right out of the bat they are to a way better start than She-Ra or ThunderCats.
There is a chance that it could be bad, but with the little info we have, things are looking good.
now after that long introduction let's get to the point of this rant. thanks I want to see and that He-man anime:
The Jojo pic is a reference of an anime with a "Westernized" artstyle. And that Jojo has a MOTU-esque physique. This leads to my first point:
- the main sources of inspiration for the character designs should be the vintage toy and filmation.
for example He-Man:
Take the Filmation He-Man as a template, but add certain toy elements to his design. (Straps on the boots, bezels on his belt and bracers)
Like that He-Man there.
Characters like Beast Man or Stratos need to have furry bodies but their outfits looking as close as to the filmation designs as possible.
If a character wasn't in the Filmation cartoon well they should filmation-ize them first then add the toy details to fit the same style of the new series.
That way we avoid the horrid costumes from Noelle Stevenson's pop cultural appropriations of She-Ra.
(Yes, Autocorrect already knows what to fill in, whenever I type Noelle)
- filmation should be the main reference for backgrounds.
De Royal pies must be red pinkish in color have similar structures and the forests must look alien. I don't want Earth forests in the cartoon
-Music should be inspired by the original, or an arrangement of the original themes... even if the original score can be used.
-Battle Armor, Thunder punch, flying fists, terror claws, and dragon blaster versions of He-Man and Skeletor respectively should appear.
-an Eternian version of Jay and Silent Bob in the background of a scene.
Since it's the 10th anniversary of the House of rants I thought I'd make a revisit of an early rant... the top 10 do's and don'ts for a Masters of the Universe movie rant. Let's let's start with something simple: respect the source material. I know that The Source material is there to sell toys. But it also has spawned 3 animated series multiple comic book series not to mention that Amalgamated storyline was made for the recent collectors line... you know the one that's written by that marketing guy that hates my guts.
So there is some backbone that you can pull stuff from and create something new... and respectful of what came before... I mean let's talk about the intro to pretty much every Masters of the Universe Cartoon:
I am Adam, Prince of Eternia; defender of the secrets of Castle Grayskull!
It's basically telling you that the main character is Prince Adam and that he has to Defend the secrets of this place called Castle Grayskull. I'm aware that the early mini-comics that predated the Filmation cartoon had a He-Man as this Barbarian Warrior.
And I had a crazy idea stewing for some time: how about Adam being both the prince of Eternia Defender Of Secrets of Castle Grayskull and the young barbarian from a jungle tribe.
Taking into consideration the possibility of having She-Ra and the kidnapping of the twins that's the way that we can get both Adams into place.
When Keldor or Skeletor kidnap the twins for Hordak we could have him lose one of the kids, in this case Adam, and Adora's taken to Hordak. While Adora is raised by The Horde Adam is raised as a member of a jungle tribe.
Perhaps Man-at-Arms was a member of this tribe that moved into the city of Eternos and still has contact with the tribe. I'm taking his adopted daughter Teela to train with the tribal Warriors. Which has a demand for us childhood friends but without the whole pressure from the palace life. The Young Adam can still meet cringer, Orko, etc. but not be raised in the palace.
By his coming of age day Adam is forced to leave the village for a trial in order to reach adulthood. While doing this trial he discovers the truth about himself and it his legacy to defend Grayskull.
Adam's Reckless and irresponsible Behavior can now be justified as he is ignorant of the Court ways due to his living with the tribe. As he gains knowledge and power from the elders his transformation into He-Man Adam keeps his facade of being Reckless and irresponsible to protect the secrets of Grayskull.
While not a perfect solution it's something reasonable that can connect with most of their Masters of the Universe fans because it keeps the pre formation lore and post filmation lore at the same time.
Well shoot! I kinda covered the
This is cringer my Fearless friend fabulous secret powers were revealed to me the day I held Aloft my magic sword and said by the power of Grayskull!
Skeletor on the other hand is a bit more difficult to to do because you have two different Origins for him:
Well technically three because you have the demon from Infinita origin you have that Keldor origin and then you have that Keldor being merged with a demon origin.
The random demon from Infinita origin has no real connection to Adam so he's basically random evil Overlord.
The evil Uncle Keldor origin is a bit too Star Warsy but I kind of like the idea that he's just an evil guy who was deformed and wants revenge. The classics toyline origin that has the merging of the demon with Keldor is a bit lame because it allows for his Redemption.
And being brutally honest it's a bit hard for me to choose an origin for Skeletor. And I kind of want to make a homage to all that came before him.
So here's my idea Keldor kidnapped at twins lost Adam, got badly badly hurt maybe a slash on his face kind of disfigured his face a lot, but he brought Adora to The Horde. As he was dying, Hordak tosses Keldor through the gate to Infinita, where the Arcane Magics of the demon dimension restore Hordak's Apprentice while warping his mind and giving him the Demonic appearance of Skeletor.
Overloaded by evil Skeletor overtakes his master and throws him and his followers into another dimension. Now what's the most powerful being on Eternia he wants to overthrow the rule of his half-brother randor and become master of the universe.
Again it's not perfect but it takes elements from Lore and kind of makes it work. It also functions as I dark mirrored version of Adam's story... kind of like a Simba/Scar thing.
On one hand you have a guy who is being put on the pressure so he can become a ruler but he doesn't want the role. On the other one you have a guy who's desire for ruling shows why he shouldn't be a ruler.
So on and so forth until you have all the key players in the story figured out.
The Next Step would be building the world of Eternia which we have stated is a sort of Dungeons & Dragons styled Middle Ages crossed with a little bit of Star Wars sci-fi names buy more steampunk in some ways. I would say it's a 75/25 ratio of barbaric fantasy vs sci-fi. If you go to Hi-Tech it stops being Masters of the Universe and becomes something else.
Like I said in my 2009 rant: music it must be all score none of these artists making their own musical "contributions" (aside Capitán Memo for the Latin American dub) and we don't need a He-Man rap...
Choosing the core characters is important and once you have them you must showcase them for example if you use let's say Tri-Klops then he needs to do the spinning visor thing, weird Vision ability, optic blasts that kind of thing. For trap-jaw it would be the modular weapons and his metal jaw chewing through swords.
For ramen would be basically hey I'm running into multiple enemies whether it's a run or jump are free. Matter if they have say Mekaneck then he must stretch his neck and use that ability in and outside of combat.
Here you have to think like X-Men where you have to be showing character you must show their powers because it's pointless to have a say Jubilee standing around and not firiing fireworks or having Kitty Pryde not phasing through walls.
I know the movie was looking to shoot in places like say Prague because of the ancient architecture there. I do like the idea but I'm worried that due to budget reasons the world would look too earth like. Eternia needs to look like an alien world something like say Pandora ladies and gentlemen.
Looking back at all the tidbits about the movie that have been released, you can tell that my faith on it succeeding is very little. This may well be He-Man's last hurrah, and I don't want it to suck...
The old rant holds up and is more concise than this wordy tirade of mine. But I wanted to celebrate 10 years of the House of Rants so I went a bit overboard there! I know it's not the longest rant but but It's Year 10 now!
This is why Noelle Stevenson's pop cultural appropriations of She-Ra is not allowed to tell you the truth about Adora's origin. A He-Man...
And apparently I have an action figure of the Showrunner... No, it's not Toygooroo!
Yes, it's Kevin Smith from The infamous Spider-Man and Black Cat mini series: The Evil that Men Do.
I could make a reference on on how Kevin Smith had a horrible scheduling with the series where he got it delayed for years and was a total CUNT about it, then he turned the miniseries into an anti-rape PSA. But here at the house of rants we always take the high road and we're not going to make fun of his no longer fat ass needing a safe space for being a total CUNT. But yeah, Kevin Smith as in Clerks, Mallrats, Chasing Amy, Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back, and Dogma fame is the showrunner for the Netflix He-Man series...
An anime? Oh... I can almost hear the reactions. It's not Western Animation... AnImE
Supposedly is the same studio that did Castlevania. personally I'd rather have an anime than calarts art-style or TumblrTard art-style.
Wait, what? A sequel to FILMATION? Okay, now I'm interested. A Teela-centric story? Take it away Mr. Joestar!
Now that we got that out of the way, let me elaborate.
I don't mind so much that dealer has a quest of Discovery to understand her lineage as the future sorceress of Grayskull. What worries me is that He-Man might become a side character in this show.
That's the only good thing revealed at Power-Con.
The rest was: SURPRISE! MOTUC IS DEAD! More Oranges crap, More MotuWWE crap, and the weird failed MOTU MINIS will get retail release as $5 bilnd box items.
It almost seems as if Mattel is allergic to my money!
I think I don't need NECA anymore... okay that's a bit of an exaggeration... I'd love to get the cartoon accurate stuff from NECA, but these are Masters of the Universe Classics compatible TMNT toys... that look like their 80s counterparts. This is seriously tempting me a lot. Just the fact that my toy progression as a child was hemen Turtles well you can see the similarities here. And dare I say this the turtles are even tempting me to skip ThunderCats...
Of course these toys will be roughly ten times expensive than they were back in the late 80s. but it's the Turtles dude.
If Super 7 knocks it out of the park with snake Mountain I've got to play sets in mind Sewer Lair and Technodrome...
Mattel forced most second parties producing MOTU Toys to stop making MOTU toys. So far Mondo's high end collectibles are safe. Super7 can do MUSCLE-like stuff and ReAction. Their faux vintage and MOTUC are off-limits.
But, they are gonna do Conan toys... And I mean
MOTUC STYLED ARNIE!!!
And pretty much everyone is
The idea of a MOTUC Arnie Conan is insane... So far we cannot see the Wizard who killed Arnie's Mother...
I'm a Vulture and Electro short of having a Hasbro Sinister Six. With this Kraven I have 4 out of 6.
Sergei Kravinoff's legacy is covered in shame after the great Hunter hasn't been able to defeat Spider-Man.
He eventually manages to defeat Spidey, bury him alive, and "replace him" before committing suicide. He was revived and he has a mutant bastard son who ALSO used the Kraven moniker.
Kraven is the main attraction here.
So, the main focus pictorially speaking will be his.
Kraven: передай привет моему маленькому другу
Articulation
From what I've seen this craving it's literally the previously-released Kraven with different lower legs so there must not be any huge changes in the articulation compared to that other Kraven. I do not own the previous release of him. His articulation is similar to standard Marvel Legends fare. I wish he had butterfly articulation in the Torso for better sniping poses. Because really he cannot aim with his bolt action rifle. The closest I've gotten to have him in a shooting pose is the: "Say ello to my little friend!" pose. and the Butterfly torso articulation would have allowed for better spear using poses. 4.0
Spidey: How are you blocking my blows?
Kraven:У меня есть сила медведя, скорость пумы и деньги мыши.
Spidey: You're in 'Murica! Speak English!
Kraven: As I was saying, you uncultured arachnid swine...
Spidey: Two things: One: I'm Spider-Man, not Spider-Ham
Two: I don't care about your sob story about Mother Russia, comrade!
paint and sculpt
The scope on this figure is really awesome. It captures the essence of Sergei Kravinoff... aside the swollen ankles that look weird. There is no visible paint slop in my figure. 4.5
Spidey: You almost castrated me with that! Sickly Vlad!* Kraven: What did you call me? *= horribly mispronounced attempt at using "cyka blyat"
Accessories
Kraven the Hunter only comes with a gun and the spear.
For the two pack, it's reasonable enough. Had he been a single pack, I would've asked for a net as an extra accessory. 5.0 Kraven's overall score is a 4.5 and it's a very hard one to top... But, since he's part of a two-pack, we have to consider as well.
Scarlet S.: What kind of supervillain kicked your ass like that? MJ: Can you believe this asshole? He called me Gwen in his sleep! Scarlet S.: Duuude, you messed up bad!! Anyways, I'm outta here! Pete: Bye Felicia! MJ: *demonic voice* PEE-TERRRRRR!!! Pete: Friday reference, MJ, not Black Cat!
So, Spidey's articulation gets a 4.0 and that's decent. At times I miss things like the ability to do full splits and hinged toes from Toy Biz.
His paint and Sculpt would be a 4.5 since there is no slop on my figure and the streamlined sculpt benefits Parker.
On Accessories he gets a 4.0 and that's due to the missing crawl hands. all Spider-Man figures need to come with the three following sets of hands:
Web shooting
Wall crawling
Punching
Spidey's overall score is 4.17 and he's a cool figure that needed a little oomph!
With the score of both figures ready we can now determine the overall score of the two pack... 4.34 is the two pack's final score. It's a nice way to obtain a hard to find figure like Kraven the Hunter and the semi-hard figure to get black suit Spidey.
Seriously, look at Early 2D games. Sure, games like Pitfall, Pong, and most of the Atari 2600 era games are SEVERELY impaired in Graphics, compared to say SFIII Third Strike. But despute their graphical limitations they have some charm to their aesthetics. If you compare that to Early 3D Polygonal games, like say Early era PS1 and Saturn games, it's not the same. When you're used to games with modern graphics and gameplay, it's VERY hard to go back to these "primitive games". Like say replaying the Original Tekken after Playing Tekken 7... For a bigger shock, go with SEGA's Virtua Fighter. They look and feel clunky with awkward controls, outdated graphics. And this goes all the way to PS3 era games. But put on Super Street Fighter 2 Turbo and the game won't feel as outdated as say Street Fighter EX +Alpha.
But this is not limited to games. Take mobies for example: 17 years ago, Tobey-Man was an amazing movie. Watch it nowadays and the CG Imagery looks incredibly dated and weird. But watch an episode of Batman: The Animated series and it's going to look as good as it did in 1994.
And now we get to the sad part... 3D Models are easier to work with than sprite art.
With 3D characters, you build the frame, build and add the skin and boom! You have a character. Then all you have to do is work on the animations and hitboxes. Alternate skins can be made available as DLC.
Not so much with Sprite based characters. You drew the first sprite... good now you have 1000+ more to go.
Alternate Costume? Redraw those 1000+ sprites all over again. This is why the beautiful sprite based games are a thing of the past... for the big companies...
So we now have to fill in 16 slots to make a lineup:
I do not know who is on B-Flynn's list, it's time to speculate!!
First let's get the super obvious picks out of the way:
01- Jaga
02- Grune
Since those two have already been sculpted by the horsemen and a half being shown around for years... ever since the Mattel Era. the next three figures are really obvious choices to everyone once before the end of the line:
03- Mumm-Ra the Everliving
04- Cheetara
05- Tygra
Sure some people would like to see Slythe, Monkian, and Vultureman which are my next three characters on the list by the way, but they'd sacrifice them just to get the previous 3 (Mumm-Ra, Cheetara and Tygra):
06- Slythe
07- Monkian
08- Vultureman
The next two, while somewhat important, are skippable, unless you have a Mattel Pumyra:
09- Lynx-O
10- Bengali
We just filled 10 slots with CORE, CORE, CORE CHARACTERS. We are missing 6.
What Faction of the Thundercats has 6 members?
11- Alluro
12- Chilla
13- Tug Mug
14- Red-Eyr
15- Amok with Luna (single carding her would be outrageous)
Oh crap now we only have one spot left...
THERE you have it 16 Thundercats slots filled with the most important characters. While yes, it would be cool to have the Berserkers, the Warrior Maidens, and others like Safari joe, Hachiman, or Mongor... it's roughly $800 worth of Thundercats merchandise... roughly $200 every 3 months. JUST to get the core folks. We got burnt with Bandai AND Mattel. Right now adult Thundercats fans just want to get the core teams before the line ends.
Not ReAction or Hipster crud! Super7's loose!
Super 7 has a Thundercats license and will we do Mattel's Thundercats Classics line.
They are releasing "Ultimates" of Lion-O, Panthro, Jackalman, and weakened Mumm-Ra.
They will be $45. The infamous China tariffs may be part of the blame for the price increase. The other part might be WB's license. (The Thundercats were a bit more expensive in Mattycollector as well). Then we have the accessories:
Each figure will have MORE NEW accessories than their Mattel versions. Hands, heads, weapons... but let's look at the figures and I'll rant about each one, shall we?
Lion-O comes with four extra hands, 2 of each vs the Mattel one who came with a spare left hand. (You have to remove the left hand for using the claw shield.)
speaking of claw Shield he comes with two extra shields. These are smooth and have a metallic glossy finish that could show a Mummy's reflection.
He also comes with an extra head and the Book of Omens.
I'm 90% sure that I will attempt to get this guy even if I own the Mattel made one.
In a way Mumm-Ra is the weakest of the four. The Urn and the Book of Omens are the biggest factor to tempt me with one. The Cloth cape is a turn off for me. (He has a second plastic cape) 45% of me getting one.
Jackalman is tempting me. I kinda want to get 2 of him. IF S7 doesn't glue the Jackalman armor, because I could turn them into generic Jackalmen and steal the guns from ine for the palace guards. (And the pauldron for Nefty-kun)
85% of me getting one. 51% for 2.
Extra head is very welcome.
Panthro like all the others has more stuff than his mouth L version but who am I kidding I am getting Panthro no matter what... but still no blasted samoflange.
People are complaining that the first Thundercats reveal is a bunch of re-releases. To be fair they have to do this because it doesn't make sense to release a Thundercats line without Lion-O... or Panthro. I'm guessing that around December or early 2020 we are going to see the official new wave of ThunderCats...
I know what you're thinking:
Mario Maker 2 isn't even a year old and you're already thinking of Mario Maker 3?
Yes. Because why not?
Since 3D World has different mechanics that cannot be adapted to traditional Super Mario Maker style and had to get a separate mode, I propose something similar for OTHER Mario games:
-Mario Brother
-Donkey Kong 94
Why these two? Well Mario Brothers lends itself for Vs. Mode stages.
The DK94 levels work on a puzzle solving arcadey type of gameplay. It also combines elements from both the Original DK and DKjr.
I didn't add Doki Doki Mario because that would require a lot more effort AND I need to save something for SMM4.
Now for Elements to work with on Normal modes (SMB, SMB3, SMW)
Magic Orb:
Remember in SMB3 when you beat a Boom Boom and it dropped these to end the stage? Well, they need a comeback for SMM. It makes mandatory boss battles more fun, since they can't be cheesed.
Koopalings:
I know that Boom Boom and Browser Jr. Have a similar function, but some of them had Unique attacks. Wendy's rings, Lemmy's balls... would be fun and refreshing in SMM.
The SML Superball in all games:
Having the Superball in SMM2's SMB mode was a pleasant surprise. It would be nice if it could be exported to SMB3 and beyond.
Ice flower:
This NSMBWii item can open up new gameplay opportunities. Makeshift ice platforms... mmmm!
Hammer suit:
One half shellmet, one half awkward fire flower... this could make SMB3 levels more special.
More enemies:
Charging chucks, shyguys, ninji, Birdo, sidestepper, fighter fly, etc.
Last but not least:
Super Wario Maker mode!
Basically adding Wario (and Waluigi) to the roster of playable characters... among other things:
Coin doors and coin checkpoints:
From Super Warioland: SML3, these doors and checkpoints would only work if the player paid 10 coins for usong them. These would force players to pay attention to their coins.
I still can't believe that I watched the Dora movie and enjoyed it a lot. I mean I'm going to buy this on Blu-ray at the moment it comes out kind of enjoyment.
The cinema I went to only have two rooms one was Hobbs and Shaw and the other was Dora. I couldn't stop giggling at myself while I ordered my Dora ticket. weirdest thing was that there were like three children in total the rest was full of adults watching Dora the Explorer. it was a really weird experience. Una experiencia bien extraña!
But the movie was a pretty enjoyable experience. It has some really cringey moments due to that whole Fish Out of Water Dora in high school thing... they did poke fun at the original a few times somewhere good-natured others where your mockery of the original.
I'm trying to give them at least amount of spoilers because I want you to go see Dora and enjoy it.
I enjoyed the movie so much that have the time I was thinking you know they could make a really cool Uncharted / new Tomb Raider Dora game based on the movie and I would buy the hell out of it!
Ah, the only thing worse than a doppelganger is a clone or a culturally diverse/gender-bent knock off...
But Marvel's Doppelgangers were created by Adam Warlock's Magus persona. Only Spider-Man's survived. He even became a pet for Shriek in Maximum Carnage.
So here's how I would describe doppelganger Spider-Man in a nutshell Bizarro Spider-Man...
Articulation:
"He has extra arms, boot cut, but everything else lost a big deal. He cannot do ANY of the Spider poses I use to test if a Spidey figure is good:
Web Yoyo
Crouch pose
MVC stance
He fails them all. Why is that? Lack of torso articulation. I understand that the torso had to be sacrificed for the arms, BUT the vanilla posed torso cancels all the point of posability... I have a bad feeling that Doppelganger will be made reusing this torso. "
Is what I said with Six-armed Spider-Man...
All of these flaws are still present on the Doppelganger. But, unlike with 6-arm Spidey, I can easily recreate most of the Poses I want with Doppelganger. (Barring some issies with the available hands) 4.5 Paint and sculpt:
Let's get my main complaint out of the way. The web sculpt on the new pieces do not match the body. The Torso the arms and the legs have the web lines engraved on the figure. The head the hands and the feet have raised web lines sculpted instead of engraved. That makes magic really grinds my gears and I'm talkin borderline OCD rage.
Other than that he's really great. one tiny grape I have is that the colors are very dark but dull and flat. part of me wants to get some metallic Bane's namely dark blue and maybe a combination of frost and the red to paint to repaint the entire figure to give it a more chitinous appearance. 4.5 Accessories:
N/A since I bought them loose. Normally he would have come with a build a figure piece and that would be it. I kind of wish he had come with three extra hands so I could have a complete double ganger with 6 open arms or 6 punching hands.
Overall
doppelganger gets a 4.5 as his final score. While I do have some tiny nitpicks they really don't detract from the figure. Toy Biz figure from the end of my childhood to early teen years you have been replaced!!
Rocko's Modern Life SHOULD STAY IN THE 90s...
No, the special did not suck, in fact, it was awesome and Close to my memories of the show.
But, in this current climate, the show could be considered "offensive" by some tail end Millenials and Gen Z folks.
The only thing they would praise from this special is how Ralph Bighead, son of Mr. and Mrs. Bighead transitioned to Rachel Bighead and pretty much everyone was OK with it. Also, it tied in to the idea of accepting Change vs. not letting go of the past. But, in this current climate, the show would suffer. Even the special had to tone down Mrs. Bighead's predatory behavior towards Rocko.
The special was a nice send off to the people of O-Town and better to go in a high note than become a shell of the shell of your former self... not going to name any shows...
The recent Massacre at a Walmart in El Paso has brought back the stupid claim that video games cause gun violence. This blatant lie was thrown by President Donald Trump recently. We've heard this song and dance for nearly 30 years:
Joe Lieberman in the 90s, Hillary Rodham Clinton in the 00s,and now Donald Trump is the newest idiotic politician who's blaming video games for gun crimes.
Once again for the people in the back: video games do not cause gun violence.
Ease of access to guns by IRRESPONSIBLE people who SHOULDN'T HAVE THEM in the first place does. I'm not putting the blame on responsible gun owners, let's make that clear.
The tone-deafness in this act is ludicrous.
Seems that's super 7 will send the servant of Crom in October... they better not Bill me twice and shipping for him since I ordered him with a William Stout collection that comes in November.
So we have to wait until the 12 to see what do they mean with this cryptic message.
They should have sat with Super 7 this could mean anything:
- It could be a continuation of the Mattel 7-inch Classics figures.
- it could be the stupid fake Kenner ReAction line.
- it could be Japanese vinyl figures.
- it could be MUSCLE styled figures.
- it could be some hipster crap like a Panthro Chia Pet or Cat's Lair litter box cover.
There's a part of me that doesn't want them to be the classics figures because I'm afraid of what could go wrong with them. Especially the female figures namely Cheetara.
At the same time I just want to get the remaining Thundercats Mumm-Ra the ever-living and the last few main mutants and call it a day. No Lunattaks, no Hachiman, hell not even Mongor!!
Though I wouldn't be opposed to a side of the main Thundercats naked as seen in the first episode.
We kinda expected this development. Also, the death of the faux vintage He-Man line was to be expected the moment Mattel revealed the Oranges line. B-Flynn was a bit evasive in that area, when asked about it.
Basically that means. Snake Mountain will be the final Classics item will see... there will not be any Filmation ram-man, Filmation Orko to complete the core characters... I kinda warned people about the scope of the Filmation line a while back, but they didn't listen...
Mattel is going to dry up the well on Masters of the Universe stuff aside Mega Bloks and the oranges line to create an artificial scarcity of Masters of the Universe products for the movie. Then they'll sweep in with the movie product with the basic crappy toys for kids and maybe a limited online edition of the movie characters in Classics and then no more classics.
Mattel is simply focusing on kids toys because they hate the adult collectors. This hatred stems simply from the fact that adult collectors demand quality product and they don't want quarter assed stuff. I understand that Mattel is in Dire Straits right now and that they can't afford to have picky customers. At the same time they're putting all their eggs in one basket and by that basket I mean the possibly crappy 2021 movie.
Finally, after all these years, the Bat Embargo has been lifted. The arrowverse has a Batman... not just any Batman but the best Batman.
Yes, boys and girls... Kevin Conroy will be playing Old Man Wayne in the CW crisis on Infinite Earths.
While he won't be Batman in his prime, he's an older Bruce Wayne who may or may not have a protegé BEYOND the Robins... See what I did there? Beyond... and Robins, because Burt Ward is in this and he could be an old Dick... Grayson, that is. Oh yeah, Superman Returns!
Yes, I KNOW Brandon Routh is The Atom, but Superman Returns Returns... Brandon Routh will wear the Supersuit that Tom Welling was afraid of wearing (before he ate Tom Welling... Lucifer reference, great show... also DC... Tecnically Vertigo, but owned by DC)
Seems like DC wants to end the arrowverse with a bang! (Not a reference to Static)
I can't truly call it an it came from the Toy Chest, since this is a customized body kit made with random Strangefate figure body parts.
My sculpting and painting skills suck ass. So, I can't make custom figures, but the body kits from Strangefate helped me make something passable. I simply added some hairy bits.
As an idiot I forgot to take the before pictures so I'm just going to post it up my 3 or 4 after pictures. You can search for Strangefate shapeways shop to find the kits. I want to get a skeleton... or 2.
All you need is paints, sealer, a bit of sandpaper, the model kit clippers, additional sculpting material if you want to go further beyond what the body kits give you.
They're pretty easy to assemble. Even I could do it and Strangefate has some instructions on his shop.
I purposely avoided face close-ups because of my inferior painting skills. (They don't do justice to the cool sculpt)
And as you can see, she can blend in rather well with MOTUC. Or even stand out if you have superior paint skills.
Strangefate also has a more basic nude body that you can sculpt over it and get a more accurate result if you wanted to make an Andra... or whomever. I just picked and chose some some preset parts that gave her a kind of a Soul Calibur created soul version of Andra. To me she's a "Classicized 200X" version.
A part of me wishes that Strangefate made male bodies as well.
