Jan 31, 2020

It came from the Toy Chest MOTUCpocalypse Part 4: Drago killed teh lien... again!

It's a bit funny, isn't it? Once again Dolph Lundgren He-Man kills and other Masters of the Universe toy line. In many ways this was the perfect to end classics. I do have a club Grayskull Stratos and Adam that I ordered from Big Bad Toy Store still debating if I'll review them or not.
 do I really need to explain He-Man?

The Super7 Ultimate MOTUC He-Man
is the best match for him.
Laser He-Man looks
a bit pinheaded here.

It shares a lot of articulations similar to classics sadly below the knees his articulation is extremely Limited.
His cloth Cape does not hinder any articulation on the upper body the shoulder pads do though.
According to the late
Brandon Lee, this He-Man
has the biggest dick he's ever seen.

Paint and sculpt 
Sans the figure is based on the concept art and not really under flandrin the likeness is not exactly there. From a few angles he does look a bit Dolph-ish but from others he doesn't. I do have to point out that the details on the armor are really good. Tiny little figures that he's too tall for a normal Classics figure. He's more in line with Dolph Lundgren tall vs. Normal figures.
He-Dolph is taller than He-Man.

 he's the only figure with an extra head. But there is no real difference between had one and his two aside a bit of stubble.
He also has a knife but he cannot hold but easy to lose.
A dagger that looks like the classic Power sword which he can not hold either.
A gun with a weight so wide that he cannot hold anything other than the gun on his left hand
He has his power shorts which he can only grip on his right hand.
The cape and harness are sadly non-removable.  and honestly it's a shame though because a lot of times in the movie Dolph Lundgren was running around without the cape and in the third Act of the movie he was without the cape and without the harness.
And this is where I'm stumped Because by the sheer number of accessories he should get a 5.0 but aside the Power sword they're all useless.
Like tossing a banana in a hallway...
It sits loosely on the Normal
He-Man as well.

He-Dolph gets a 3.5 as his final score.  he's not a bad figure per se but the blunders with his accessories  hurt his score. He should have come with an alternate left-handed that could hold this smaller grip items like the knife and Dagger. The saddest part is that I love to figure except the cape. And if I wanted a capeless he man I would have to go through there third-party vendors by one and carefully cut out the cape
Skeletor: Tell me He-Man, how does it feel
being the destroyer of another MOTU Line?
He-Man: I did not kill MOTUC, Nefty did. Just
ask The Mighty Spector!

Jan 30, 2020

TMNT wave 2 is being Teased by Super7

And it's
Leonardo's backside... which is similar to Raphael's backside, minus the harness... so this tease feels weak!

 Don't get me wrong: I love that we are getting Leonardo, but he, Donatello, and Michelangelo are obvious figures.
Shredder, Krang, Bebop, Rocksteady, Casey, April, or any non-Turtle character would've been a better tease. I'm aware I mentioned some obvious characters but they have unique sculpts... compared to the turtles who would literally share sculpts.
Wallet is crying and that pose is giving me Krellian vibes...

It came from the Toy Chest MOTUCpocalypse Part 3: Chiquita Banana God Skeletor

Skeletor is now the god of Potassium infused fruits... made by God and not Evolution. Ask DJ Tanner's brother.

Basically Grayskull power Skeletor makes him gold.
Nefty: *sigh*

The only two real differences between this Skeletor and the other Skeletor are the head and the crotch piece. With this had he has a much better range of articulation but delay articulation is a bit more limited due to the new crotch piece. Just like the other Skeletor this one is very hindered in the articulation Department.
GSkeletor: That's MY stick!!
Skeletor: It's My Stick! I found it!
GSkeletor: Skeletor, stop it now!

Paint and sculpt 
I say mentioned  the articulation section Skeletor uses most of the previous Skeletor's mold. This same everything is painted in shades of gold. I'm by shapes I mean everything's the same golden color but some sections get a little bit of a wash While others are plain.
My stick!!

God Skeletor only has the Havoc Staff... while accurare to the movie, he feels VERY bare bones.

Hell a golden version of his sword would have been cool or even a golden Cosmic key.
For a $45 repaint with only a new head he should've cpme with a lot more.

As much as I love Chiquita banana golden god Skeletor he gets a 2.83 as his final score. It's not that he survived figure it's just that Super7  did the bare minimum with him.

Jan 29, 2020

It came from the Toy Chest: MOTUCpocalypse Part 2: Skeletor

The best part of the movie was Frank Langella as Skeletor. Now Langella's Skeletor has been immortalized in plastic as an action figure.

Without me saying anything you already know that the articulation is problematic. Shoukderpads, cape, draping tasset-like skirt. All of these limit his articulation he doesn't have a boot cut.

Paint and sculpt 
This Skeletor is far more colorful than I remembered. Escape is in a weird purple / blood red color and he has lots of accents I didn't notice before. Sadly the paint has a bit sloppy and in some of the details there is a little bit of paint bleed.  it is not the end of the world as we know it but it's there and it's noticeable.

Normal sized and movie accurate Cosmic Key.
Havoc Staff
Dark Sword
I wish we could have gotten a second head for Skeletor maybe screaming,  because he needed a little bit extra

Skeletor gets a 4.33 as his final score. The figure did pretty well despite its limitations. I kind of wish he had got in interchangeable heads because I totally would have bought an extra of this guy just to swap in the langella skull for the toy skull... just to have a truly classicized Skeletor.

Jan 28, 2020

It came from the Toy Chest: MOTUCpocalypse Part 1: Karg

The William Stout wave is the end of Classics and I'm not going to wait until December to review these guys. I chose Karg to start because theoretically speaking he's the weakest of the bunch. He's basically a repaint of the previous Karg figure with a different hook.

One of Skeletor's henchmen in the 1987 movie. He looks like a crossover between a bat and Tina Turner...  if Tina Turner was a pirate. He was an unofficial replacement to trap jaw due to the hook hand and he was off-limits to Mattel. Super7 somehow managed to make him both the comic / newspaper strip and the movie version. I don't know how they did it but I'm glad they did.

While the figure is literally a Karg repaint, I'm not going to be that Lazy by copying and pasting the previews karg review.  There is no real difference in the articulation between both Karg figures. Having a hinged wrist is nice, but the hinge is in the wrong direction. A "sword aloft" hinge would've been better.

Paint and sculpt:
Sadly he didn't get any real Improvement in the sculpt. The Quilted pants would've been a welcome addition but alas.  the new Hook is a welcome addition and the paint job is pretty good on him. I hate the super soft hook.

Freaking same as the previous figure. How can he dual wield it says he only has one hand? I know they didn't have anything to add, but come on!

Karg gets a 4.17 as his final score. A new hook hand does not justify this repaint at a higher price point. It literally feels like they KNEW this wave was coming and forced us to double dip on Karg.

A "Live Action" Beast Wars movie!?

I am torn here. I LIKE Beast Wars, but I don't want to see a "Live Action" movie based on it. Think about it: Beast Wars is basically "The Lion King" of Transformers. As in no human being is alive in the period where the events of Beast Wars is happening. We're talking deep Prehistoric era here. Making it "Live Action" defeats the point of "Live Action" since all the characters are CGI.

Also, I'm afraid they'd MICHAEL BAY the Hell out of Beast Wars. By that I mean change the idea of the series that it barely rwsembles the spurce material... and making the Transformers themselves play background characters as Shia LaBeouf and Marky Mark try to get laid.

Al5sp, there might be a sequel to Bumblebee...

Jan 27, 2020

Jay and Silent Bob Reboot: the Rant

Oh boy... Where to begin? Well this is not a good movie. No really it isn't: Kevin Smith spends a lot of the time reminding us at this is not a good movie.

 Here's the premise: Jay and Silent Bob discovered that the blood man and chronic movie is getting a diversified reboot and once again head to Hollywood in order to stop it. Along the way Jay discovers he has a daughter who has her own gender and racially bent Silent Bob.

The entire movies literally a critique about Hollywood rebooting movies while trying to reboot the Jay and Silent Bob franchise I'm falling into the same traps that they are criticizing. Call Rite Aid in lots of self referential humor, guest actors phoning it in, constant reminders of how much Kevin's made has fallen from Grace since the 90s.

I did chuckle at a few of them, but the one that made me laugh like a madman:
Deflated Affleck looks weird as Hell!
On the othet hand, despite the movie being objectively bad, I enjoyed it for all the wrong reasons.
I saw the desperate attempts of a man trying waay too hard to stay culturally relevant after a near brush with death would have made him a has been in more ways than one. For a moment there I thought I was watching a Seth MacFarlane version of the Viewaskewniverse.

But I'm not as afraid of Kevin Smith's MOTU than I am for Clerks 3.

Jan 26, 2020

Uncharted movie delayed and He-Man is back to development hell.

That move was unexpected... and as Heinz Doofenshmirtz would say: By unexpected I mean completely expected!!
Yes, Sony has pushed back He-Man... again. Now it's officially TBD.  But then again, it's SONY PICTURES... the ones who screwed up Spider-Man TWICE! Then there's Ghostbusters 2016, Venom and the Upcoming Morbius.

While, yes, Morbius isn't out yet, the movie looks like crap.
And again, it's SONY PICTURES. If Amy Pascal is somehow involved, chances are it'll suck. But back to the original topic. He-Man has been delayed indefinitely.

What does this mean to the brand and Mattel?
Now the two cartoons will carry a lot of weight. He-Man add to an extent Mattel itself depend on them.  No pressure...

In a way I kind of understand Mattel cock-blocking Super 7... what I really don't understand is Mattel cock-blocking all the fans by "eliminating Classics". I'm pretty sure that fans would have bought classic characters based on the new He-Man series and She-Ra characters based on the new-look but in Classics style. The Origins line is not for everybody. Right now Mattel's only hope is that the origins line becomes a huge success with children.  because if the toy line fails bye-bye cartoons. As we saw in 2004 when the Mike Young Productions He-Man and the Masters of the Universe was cancelled.

Let's hope the Netflix rumor Rings true now because otherwise He-Man is in great Danger

Jan 24, 2020

Kojima's ego is getting far too big... even for Kojima standards

Now he wants to make Kojima Productions a Multimedia empire. The original article talked at first on Kojima's desire to not just make big games... translation: smaller, simpler games pay the bills that would allow Kojima to regurgitate his "genius" all over our consoles.

But to pay his bills, he wanta to branch out beyond games... or how his blind follower would put it: He's diversifying his creativity.

IT'S NO SECRET that he wants to be a Hollywood director. The whole making an anime series is a con to pad out his resume. Will he put all of his passion into it? I don't know...
His genius is akin to this:

And while making a string of homages to great movies works well for video games making a movie that references other movies is kinda like Family Guy... but without the humor. Also that's not mentioning the many times he oughta references himself and his past works.

But Kojima making an anime...
The Protagonist would be the related to the Antagonist. He'd probably have some sort of issue. Let's use depression, feelings of inadequacy just to have crippling impairment that will only be brought up at certain moments of the story. He'll be surrounded by a group of somewhat colorful characters that have a particular trait. Let's add some weird government conspiracy. Some weird genetic anomaly between the protagonist and maybe the protagonist's mom. The final episodes would be a huge Exposition dump with weird random visuals the protagonist ends up saving the world but at what cost...

 NOW I'm not sure if this is a Hideo Kojima game made into an anime or Neon Genesis Evangelion...
Did they already made Neon Genesis Evangelion so why would you want a Hideo Kojima copy of Evangelion when the original exists.

In any case we shall see...

WB should take a page out of Mattel's playbook with Thundercats.

As much fun as it is to make fun out of Mattel's moronic ways, they get it right once in a while. I know broken clock correct time twice a day and such. What metal is doing right is making two He-Man series : one for kids and one for old school fans. Three ways that's a different story but I'm not talking about the toys this time.

I'm talking about having an animated feature for kids and one for adults.   everyone knows that that most of Warner's animated features especially the ones based on DC Comics kick all sorts of ass...  well what Warner Brothers owned property has received a small DC Comics run?

 Masters of the Universe... but who have been guest stars in some issues of that run?

The Justice League!!!

Thundercats the answer is ThunderCats!  so Warner Brothers should make an animated adaptation of Masters of the Universe vs. ThunderCats:  that way old school fans can get a bit of love and not have to see the crap that Manbun Soyboy made. Yep I don't even know the Guy's real name, so Manbun Soyboy it is.

Since Warner owns DC collectibles and ThunderCats they could make some limited edition DCCC ThunderCats... and DCC MOTU if Mattel doesn't act like a bunch of morons. In the style of the animated feature similar to the Batman TMNT toys that DCC released.

And maybe if the feature does well, it could show Warner that a real Thundercats series would be well received.

Jan 23, 2020

Toss a coin to your OVA oh valley of plenty...

Netflix is milking the Hell out of The Witcher. Now they're making an animated movie following an adventure with Geralt of Rivia. The Witcher: Nightmare of the Wolf is supposed to show up this Summer. Brought to you by the same people who made The Legend of Korra and Voltron legendary Defender.

I wonder if they'll use the voice actors from the game series or the TV series or maybe a whole new cast... I kind of want to hear the game cast in the OVA. Jaws to separate the live-action series from the animated version unless the animated movie is Canon to the live-action version...

In any case, I hope it works and that it's an enjoyable experience.

Jan 22, 2020

Odds and ends Jan 22 2020: Jesus Christ, that's a lot of lag!!

In 2004, Mel Gibson gave us a religious snuff movie with:
The Passion of The Christ.
17 years later: The Resurrection of Christ is coming...
 The Passion of the Christ is getting a sequel...  17 years later... according to IMDB March 31st 2021 is the date.
Of course this has to be taken with a grain of salt.  and IMDb some of this stuff can be altered and well you can get false positive results. In any case if Mel Gibson is releasing a sequel to The Passion of the Christ he's a bit too late if you think about it. Heck, even back by the time of Passion, he was a bit late with Caviezel being  35-36 for Passion. Add 16 years and a few months. And we have a 50 year old Jesus.

16 years is a huge difference. It's going to be weird having a Jesus stats 16 years older when he was supposed to be back in 3 days... You can get away with one or two years in a sequel and sometimes up to 5 but 16!? Dude that's insane!!

Heath Ledger, assassinated by an Olsen... according to cpnspiracy theorists, is getting immortalized in vinyl as a giant Funko Pop of his rendition of the Joker is coming in 2020. That's some great news for people who collect Funko Pops.  while I do collect some it's not like a huge collection but since I'm on the topic of Funko Pops... He-Man is coming back to Funko Pops we'll get a new version of him Skeletor, Prince Adam, Sorceress, and a Funko He-Man riding Battlecat... among others. The mighty Spector is not one of them.

I recently started playing: Las Maravillosas Aventuras de Gerardo el Magias 3: Protegiendo a Cirila de los Cazadores Malditos del Inframundo... or the game popularly known as: The Witcher 3: The Wild Hunt.  Somebody should have warned me about this game sucking up all of my free time. And it feels like it's going to be a really long game and I'm talkin 90s jrpg long... which is a double-edged sword because limited game play time as an adult means that it'll take me a long long time to review.  but the positive side is that along the game can help me pass the time until Final Fantasy 7 remake shows up.  An extra positive is that tonight is my night off so I'll be able to play the game a bit longer and hopefully progress a little bit in the story.

Jan 20, 2020

MOTUCpocalypse is coming:

The end is nigh: The seals have been broken. Man! These figures stink!!  I mean that in the literal sense, as in a bad odor emanates from them. I've been playing with them tinkering with them just to get my groove of things on make the reviews.  I know the final item is Snake Mountain which I'm dying to have in my hands,  but for all intents and purposes Masters of the Universe Classics is dead. Sure power Gun May squeeze I repaint or two out of existing parts but it's dead... period!!

It has been quite a ride to be honest. I shed Blood Sweat and tears with these toys. From the incompetence of Matty and Digital River to the incompetence of Super 7... this line survive so long only due to the tenacity of the fans. We saw so many wonderful things with this line and others not so wonderful but it was a love letter to Masters of the Universe.

 IT'S been one hell of a ride 11 or 12 long years depending on what do you consider the starting point... in a way it's sad that it's over when there was so much to do but at the same time it was time to go... or so claimed Mattel. I don't see how the existence of Classics interferes with the existence of origins. I get getting super7 to cancel the filmation 5.5 inch versions of Masters. Those are a little direct competition to the origins line. I simply don't understand how an adult collector oriented online only Niche line can be competition to a mass retail 5.5 in line for children. Especially since they'll gave you a key for two different He-Man and the Masters of the Universe cartoons.

 But in any case just knowing that I was able to reconnect with my child self and have a very complete Masters of the Universe collection surpassing my childhood self collection and finally getting a complete set of the basic characters of She-Ra the real deal not that pop cultural the pop cultural Appropriations by Noelle Stevenson...  is an amazing thing. Hell even getting to like new adventures it's a big Triumph to me.

Yes I'm aware this rant feels like a retread in my thanking Motu Classics for existing.  but looking back at the bigger picture all I can say is wow.

 Thank you He-Man, for being the Gateway to the world of imagination...  for being my first hero... for stopping me from allowing the darkness to overtake me... for fueling my passion, my joy, my anger... thank you for being a friend... No Golden Girls reference.

But, man! These final figures REALLY STINK!!
Not even NECA nor McFarlane have realeased such stinkers... Hell, even Stinkor doesn't stink as much as these!

Jan 18, 2020

Storm Collectibles dropped a bomb!

We've had All the male ninja in MK 1/2 style, Shao Kahn, Goro, Baraka, the Tekunin, UMK3 style Scorpion... They showed Liu Kang, Johnny Cage, The Female Ninja MK2 style...
Guess who we're getting?

That's right, the God of Thunder himself... Lord Raiden.
That means:
Kano, Liu Kang, Johnny Cage, Sonya, and Shang Tsung are the missing MK1 people.

Kitana, Mileena, Jade, Jax, Kung Lao, Kintaro, and another Shang Tsung are the missing MK2 people in addition to the MK1 folk.

Raiden looks pretty neat! I'm still debating on getting MK3 and beyond stuff, but so far the 1/2 is what I want.

Dad of Boi: The review

A couple years ago you wouldn't catch me dead praising the God of War series. I have to be honest I didn't like the original game back then. I found the game very shallow and Unworthy of praise despite the story being the best element of it... and that one I found cliched and tired as well.

With age I learned to appreciate Kratos's Revenge story. Now that Kratos has destroyed Olympus and hid in Midgard, I too am a fan of the Ghost of Sparta.

 So let's pick up the Leviathan axe, summon the Boi, and let's take his mother to her final resting place.

The team did an excellent job for this game. The non Kratos characters look super impressive and totally resembled their voice actors. I was watching a random movie the other day and Boi was in it. You can guess my reaction when I saw him:

A) I said: "Atreus!!"
B) I said: "Holy shit, that kid looks like Boi! Let's hit imdb to make sure... It IS BOI!!"
C) I said: "That kid could totally play BOI if they make a live action movie... to imdb!! Huh, he IS BOI!! Nice work CG artists..."
D) I said: "Kratos is Zodac... Holy crap... Kratos is Zodac... King Hssss killed my brother, Boi... Damn, you kid that looks like BOI! Now I wanna play Dad of Boi!"

Please leave your answer in the comments.

Back on topic the human characters look very realistic The Munsters look pretty cool but I wish there was a bit more variety of them. But the backgrounds are gorgeous. The beauty of them kind of makes you want to walk and look at the breathtaking views but then monsters come and ruin it for you and you have to hack them away.

You are Kratos the newest God of War of Olympus hiding in midgard due to the consequences of kratos's actions in the previous games.  you found a wife and raised a son until her passing. Little did you know that this would put you in the sight of Odin and he's even more pissed off than Zeus. I see you take your wife to her final resting place you have to deal with monsters and Odin's Heralds.  this time the story feels a lot more intimate than in previous games since the focus is Kratos and his son.

Sounds and music
The music has a bit of a Nordic flavor... then again it should since it's God of War in the realm of the Norse gods.
I've praised the work of the voice actors before in my first thoughts rant and once again I have to praise their job here.  Great Performances all around.

People have claimed that God of War is basically The Last of Us crossed with dark souls.  I'd say that it's a fair assessment. Gone are the ridiculously annoying platforming elements from the previous games, but at the same time day insanely paste fast combat is also gone. The combat in this game is a bit slower but at the same time each blow feels more powerful. It still is as visceral as previous God of War games. Only this time there is no sex Mini-Game... most likely because Kratos is now a family man and he's carrying around the Boi!
The camera can be a little bit of a pain in the ass to set up especially on the valkyrie battles.

 the controls are pretty responsive in this game. I cannot talk up any mistakes I did to them it. That control scheme feels a bit awkward at first but once you get used to it it becomes second nature. Switching between the acts and the blades of chaos is rather simple and many of my mistakes were my own fault. The only nitpicking I have to make is controlling the camera issue with the  Valkyrie fights.

Fun factor
The game is pretty fun pretty straightforward despite being an open world title or I should say a pseudo open world title. Some of the norn rune chest puzzles can be a pain, what is an overall enjoyable experience.

Dad of Boi gets a 9.17 as its final score. Even if you don't care about previous God of War games I would recommend playing this one. To me the whole journey to deliver Faye's ashes why is a very touching experience.  mostly because it was like a warped mirror version The Journey my brother and I have to do to deliver our Mom's ashes. Only with a lot last dead bodies and no Angry Gods coming at us.  The way the series is having it looks like the next game will be the end for Kratos... and Boi would take the mantle of protagonist.

Jan 17, 2020

Random musings: Jan.17 2019

I'm still debating whether I save the MOTUC Movie wave for Advent calendar ICFTTC or if I take them out sooner. They do you do these figures are the end for Classics it's a bit scary for me. Perhaps that's why I haven't been eager to open them. What's a dude that's it the end...

But it's funny... Super7 actually brought MOTUC back to its roots full circle... The line started with King Grayskull, a figure who was inspired by the Dolph Lundgren He-Man.
Super7 ENDED Classics with Dolph Lundgren He-Man... a much better ending than Dare... Suck it, Neitlich!

What are the cereal shapes in Lucky Charms?
I was eating cereal... yes, Lucky Charms... and I was looking at the cereal shapes and they looked a bit Runic to me. No, I didn't spend five minutes calling the Boi to translate them for me. I spent 8. They totally look like Runes and with the leprechaun, one wouldn't be far-off to think of Celtic Runes with the Leprechaun based cereal.

Well, I'm wrong! Fish, Arrowhead, Cross, Bells, and Clovers (though I believe that last one was discontinued) are the official shapes.

I'm guessing these shapes were chosen because they look Rune a canal but they can weasel their way out of any accusations of it being rooms and promoting Pagan religions.

Jan 16, 2020

All this time I had beaten Dad of Boi and I didn't know...

I beat the game a few days back without knowing it...
It was unexpected. The game kept going after the Baldur battle. How was I supposed to know HE WAS the final boss. I delivered Laufey's ashes to Jotunheim and expected a clash with Thor or something, but no. That was it. The game ends in allowing me to catch up on the sidequests I missed.

It was a change of pace compared to other games,  but at the same time it's a bit underwhelming. I will do the full game review in a few days I'm just trying to figure everything out...  also I may be playing The Witcher 3...

I blame Jaskier for that...

But yes, the review of Dad of Boi is coming along.
Blue balls... that's the best way to describe the ending.

Jan 15, 2020

Yo Joe! Rumors of a 6 inch line...

There is a rumor about a 6 inch Joe line...
Yes, a 6 in GI Joe line...
The rumor mill has revealed the 5 figures in the first wave:
Snake Eyes (2 per case)

This wave seems to be leaning a bit too much in favore of the Joes the second wave we'll probably lean towards Cobra.

They're probably going to release the ninja Snake Eyes First because I'm a fan of the Commando Snake Eyes... and the universe loves to conspire against me.

Hopefully by the time they make Cobra Commander they just give us one figure and his two main looks. There is no need to release a hooded Cobra Commander and then a helmet headed Cobra Commander. The only Cobra Commander variants we should get our the black recoloring and the DIC version.

 That first Wabe covers nearly half of my Joe wants.
The only ones missing are shipwreck, Flint, Lady Jaye, General Hawk and Sergeant Slaughter as the main ones I want.

For the Cobras: obviously Cobra Commander, Baroness Doctor Mindbender, Arashikage, Baron Bludd,  the Crimson twins, Zartan, and the Dreadnoks as my main wants.

Sure there are other characters I would like like say quick kick, Wild Bill, Gung Ho, serpentor, etc. But I won't be going very deep down the well with this one.

Guys like snake eyes and Storm Shadow can get a couple of variants. Figures like dial tone are less likely to get variants. So hopefully Hasbro won't go super crazy on the variants.

Supposedly, the info claims the reveal will be by Toyfair.

Jan 14, 2020

Final Fantasy 7 remake delayed and this is good news

Sure, this means I'll be 38 when it comes out, but it still is happening... and the delay wasn't as big as a Shenmue 3.  9 days after April Fools Cloud and friends will return.  The game will be 38 days later from the original release date.

Square Enix claims that the delay will be for polishing a few things here and there. Personally I don't buy it scenes they would need to have the games ready long before the actual release date. This might give them a week or two for final touches but there's something off here. I'm more inclined to believe that this slight delay is related to Kingdom Hearts 3 DLC more than anything. Think about it the DLC will be released on January 23rd. That would have given them barely 40 days until Final Fantasy 7 remake... possibly a lot less if they release a demo of the game sometime in February.

If they actually do some final touches hopefully they won't involve a massive day one patch. And this part of ensuring that they aren't any huge game breaking bugs from the start it's part of the good thing I mentioned. also now the larger gap between Kingdom Hearts 3 DLC and Final Fantasy 7 helps fan of both Kingdom Hearts and Final Fantasy 7.  these Express 38 days at all the players to enjoy the DLC a bit more before heading to Final Fantasy 7 remake. It obviously benefits Square Enix because it allows customers to buy the KH3 DLC while they wait for Final Fantasy 7 remake.

But the only drawback about Final Fantasy 7 Remake being released in 2020 is at my mom's missing out on that game. She had to endure some of my multiple playthroughs of that game. Hell, she knew plenty of the game and could discuss story elements as if she had played it herself. She was Team Tifa.

In any case we'll have to wait just a bit longer before we can have Cloud in drag go on a crazy motorcycle chase And Rule 34 artists begin flooding to Final Fantasy pages with Jessie art.

Odds and ends Jan 14 2020

Better get Queen ready...
Stan Kirsch, who played Richie in Highlander: The Series
Passed away on the 11th... according to the Official Highlander page on Facebook. I'm not 100% sure on the truth behind this because I cannot find any links about it.
The closest thing I could find was this that claims his death was suicide. In any case my condolences to friends and family.

There is a rumor brewing... Buh-bye Zendaya, hello True MJ. This is laughably bad. I'll explain:
-It shows that the Michelle Bluff was a bust. By replacing her with MJ, it just shows that they caved to pressure and she was just a failed attempt at diversity.
-While it helps sell the idea that Peter is coming out of his shell (not a TMNT reference), it makes the time we invested on them pointless.
-Pushing her away would mean we miss a somewhat OK character, whose biggest sin was being a cheap Mary Jane knockoff. Had she been Glory Grant...

Keeping the Spidey theme going: Vulture cameo is pushing the moronic idea of a Sinister Six. I know, I know, I have said that I want the Sinister Six before. But the Sinister Six that I want is the real Sinister 6 Vulture, Electro, Kraven, Mysterio, Sandman, and Doctor Octopus.
I don't want Sony Scrappy theme with Morbius, Carnage, Etc.

If we're going for the Sinister Six we need to do it right and not Sony's moronic way.

Jan 13, 2020

Morbius the alleged pedophile trailer is live.

I am not a fan of Jared Leto. My dislike of him has nothing to do with his alleged penchant for underage teens. I don't like Leto as an actor. I find him overrated and most of his recent performances have been laughably bad... his ability to pick bad roles and make them worse reminds me of another Academy Award Winner who has ridden the coattails of his Oscar for far too long. I'm talking abiut Nicolas Cage. Jared Leto is the Snart Sense version of Nicolas Cage. The only difference is that Nicolas Cage will do any movie Leto is more selective in the crap he makes.

There's the trailer for Morbius The Living Vampire.
My first gripe with it is that Jared Leto is too handsome to play Michael Morbius. And while yes Leto with makeup can look like a classic Morbius, he was not the correct choice for this role.
Second this is Sony without Marvel... and this will be another turd in the Wind... and based on the trailer it kind of looks like morbius gets his vampiric powers from Supernatural means and not science. Everyone who knows Marvel already knows that more abuse is not a real vampire he is a pseudo Vampire made by science.
 and lastly why is the Spider-Man PS4 game being used as a picture of Spider-Man? On what is Bruce Wayne doing in this movie... err, I meant Adrian Toomes. Oh God no please tell me there another joining this piece of shit to the MCU...

The only positive I could see from this is if we get a 6 arm Tom Holland...

A Thundercats videogame: the rant

Seeing that Thundercats is destined for mediocrity thanks to Manbun Soyboy's abomination, could there be something be done for fans of the Real Thundercats?

A videogame is a nice option. I can't trust TV series, seeing that WB thought that Manbun Soyboy had a great idea.
I can't  trust  comics since DC gave us MUMM-RATOR and Skeletor kicked Lion-O in the dick.
And toys well super7 is in charge of that... guess I'll be seeing the Mattel re-releases in 2021.
So yes video games seem to be the only reliable option for ThunderCats.

Of course the easiest solution would be make a fighter like say a have netherrealm Studios do a Thundercats fighting game. It's a shame that Capcom is no longer making 2D Sprite base games because a 2d Sprite base game on Thundercats would be glorious. Maybe thw Guilty Gear people could do it...

 Now that I mention Capcom a 2d beat-em-up like the final fight games or Captain Commando Cadillacs and dinosaurs would be a perfect fit for ThunderCats. I know, I know Konami had a great team for those type of games but sadly Konami is now in the Pachinko business.

Bought a 3D action beat him up platformer game like the old God of War Games Devil May Cry Bayonetta who work for ThunderCats. The problem here is that the story would suffer a little bit due to their multiple characters... unless the story is divided by "episodes" and you control a specifoc character in each episode... like say:
The first episode you control Wilykat to learn some basics. Then you change to Wilykit to learn the rest of the basics. Then to end the "tutorial episode" the game switches to Lion-O as you face the Thunderkittens in a training boss battle. After the Tutorial episode is finished, Lion-O uses the Sight beyond Sight to check out on Lynx-O and the first true level of the game begins.

An open world game could also work but it would be limited and which characters we could use and by limited I mean we would focus mostly on Lion-O. Oh God I just imagined that Ocarina of Time type of game with Thundercats were Link is Lion-O and Navi is Snarf...
"Hey! *Snarf!* Lion-O!"

Seriously Thundercats needs some respect!!!

Jan 12, 2020

Manbun Soyboy wants to outdo Noelle Stevenson... a Thundercats Roar rant.

Thundercats roar  has been released and it's crap.  we all already knew that. This Abomination was released on the Cartoon Network app... which is is a useless app  by the way.
This is what I got every time I tried to use the Cartoon Network app to watch this abomination.

Manbun Soyboy: Apparently was raped
with a Thundercats toy as a child.

This dickhole makes Noelle Stevenson's pop cultural appropriations of She-Ra look like a Masterpiece.

First 90 seconds of the first episode. The only good thing I can say about it is that they reuse the 80s music. Everything else is basically flipping the bird at the classic fans taking a massive shit on the franchise... and unlike "She-Ra", where you had a somewhat ok show without it being called She-Ra; here you don't have that luxury. This "show" forces the Thundercats into a strange mold, but its "humor" is tailored to sullying any good thing the brand has. Panthro is literally a black man stereotype. For some reason tygra is the butt monkey. cheetara thinks she's all that. The Thunder kittens are  hopped up in methamphetamines. Jaga is an idiot and Snarf's a robot.
 And the least we talk about Lion-O the better.

 if you love ThunderCats don't watch this abomination. If you hate Thundercats don't watch this abomination.

Jan 10, 2020

Dad of Boi: first Thoughts:

Boy! I can't believe that this change of pace makes for a refreshing GoW Experience.
Almost as Refreshing as Zodac making Dad Jokes

While I *KNOW* I'm 2 years late to the party, Kratos and Atreus are the best Awkward Father/child team... Sorry Baby Yoda, you have been dethroned by a Low-Key Douche... Spoilers!

Not going to lie but I almost ended up buying a Kratos Costume at Party City... Ended up getting a Keyblade. Can't get the costume if there is no Leviathan Axe or Blades of Chaos... And Also, I'd need a Boi.

The slower pace similar to The Last of Us, but it allows Kratos to be fleshed out as a character, aside his permarage mode. It took a bit of time to get used to the game, but I'm enjoying it now a lot. Currently I'm somewhat close to the end, but I'm going for the side stuff before beating it. (I know, delaying the inevitable)

Like Resident Evil 4, This game brings a breath of fresh air to a franchise that needed one BIG TIME.
Once I beat the game I will do the full-fledged review. Also, I'm debating on whether or not should I ask for a Dad and Boi set for my Birthday.

Jan 8, 2020

Post Quake Jan 7 2020 odds and ends:

I survived the Quake and luckily only had to spend 24 hours without power. Sadly many people in the Southwest region of the Island lost everything. Sadly, since it's an election year, the Governor, and other key Politicians are BSing their way to "work for the people". If I hear of any legitinate charities to help those in need I'll let y'all know.

But enough Serious and Gloomy stuff... this is the House of Rants, so I need to bitch about toys ASAP! SO, LET'S USE MY NEWEST FAVORITE TARGET: Super7...

 they sent me a ship notification for the William Stout collection... supposedly by Friday I will have my Chiquita banana Skeletor... not quite Dolph Lundgren He-Man,  Hot Topic Skeletor,  and golden Karg... well I'm going to be opening these SOB's ASAP they will come out of the toy chest for the 2020 advent calendar.

The box has been mocked up... looks Castle Grayskull-ish in size. Hopefully I'll get this before the fifth anniversary of my mom's death.  I honestly don't know where the heck I'm going to put it now but I'll have to figure it out before summer I hope...

It's kinda sad that these 4 figures and Snake Mountain are likely to be the Final MOTU ICFTTC here...

Funko Really wants me to make some Yogurt...

They're making Neon Genesis Evangelion pops so far we've got REI, Asuka, and Shinji... there is a 6 in Eva unit 01... but y'all know I'm just going to get Shinji and Asuka because yogurt.  I actually do hope they make Gendo... yes in precisely that pose.  I also wish we could get a Shinji yogurt Factory 2 pack but it's highly unlikely. I think I may have mentioned this before but now they're coming soon as in sometime this year. I even got the notification to pre-order them from the usual e-tailers I buy from.

Jan 7, 2020

After seeing The Witcher and playing Dad of Boi... Could this work as a Netflix series?

Think about it... If Sam Raimi could pull a long series about Hercules, Doing a God of War series wouldn't be as Far-fetched...
I KNOW... Videogame adaptations tend to be bad and The Witcher is TECHNICALLY A BOOK SERIES. But, God of War COULD learn a bit from both Hercules The Legendary Journeys and The Witcher, in order to be a good series.

The frantic Pace of the first games, obviously can't be 100% be emulated, since a TV series would require a character arc and some development other than "RAHHH! I'M CRATE-ASS!! GODS TRICKED ME!! ME KILL GODS!!! RAAAAHH!!" I'd suggest having the First 3-5 seasons dealing with Greek Era Kratos and implementing the PSP side games as flashbacks within the episodes in a sort of B-Story way... similar to how Arrow did the Flashbacks telling Oliver's story. Then again, there ARE Novelizations of the games, which could help as starting blocks to build the series.

While he SHOULDN'T KILL EVERYONE HE MEETS, Kratos should kill SOME the people he helps, because he's a raging misanthrope... just save it for the annoying ones. Also, screw it... Kevin Sorbo must be Zeus... I KNOW he WAS Hercules in GOW3, but his 60s would be bigger by the time this theoretical series reaches its Final season, game 3 end...

I'm keeping the series JUST on the Greek Era, because it's the one that requires some expansion to work on TV... Also, having a single Dad of Boi Norse era game makes it harder to spawn a series here.

Think about it, if CASTLEVANIA COULD SPAWN A SERIES BASED ON A NES GAME... imagine what they could do with God of War.

Jan 6, 2020

Thundercats are LOOSE!! Or at least their pre-order...

Super7's Second set of Thundercats are on the move...
Felt the magic, heard the roar... and all that.
As stated, I only ordered Mumm-Ra and Tygra.
Mumm-Ra ended up being $60 due  Ma-Mutt and S7 "logic".

This, of course has raised a chain of groans by collectors and T-cats fans. I get it, Super7 items are mildly overpriced and somewhat questionable quality... (hashtag Snake Mountain fears) but they lack the same resources big companies like Mattel, Hasbro or somewhat smaller companies like NECA do.

But, on the other hand, this may be THE FINAL LINE OF OUR THUNDERCATS!! For that reason is why I caved.
I know it sounds like a weird flimsy excuse / emotional blackmail to justify these, but it is what it is. Bandai had forsaken us, Mattel did too. Unlike MOTUC,  which is done for, or TMNT, that has other avenues to get good toys (NECA and Japanese imports) Thundercats has NOTHING on the 1:12/1:10 scale for toys.

Expectations are low, of course, but my need to have the core team of Thundercats has led me to Super7...
I WISH that it wasn't this way, but it is what it is... in any case, we'll find out in q3 2021 when they come out of the toy chest
Tygra what's updated and will receive the correct Aqua coloring instead of the blue from previous pictures.
Also Mom is going to be 8 or 9 in tall instead of the traditional 7in from the classics figures. It still doesn't justify the $60 price tag for Mumm-Ra but it makes it sting a little bit less.

Jan 4, 2020

Netflix's The Witcher: The rant

So, I saw The Witcher on Netflix...
And I must confess that most of my knowledge of the franchise comes from old memes and Soulcalibur 6.

 I haven't read the books but I knew of them, thanks to some friends that are more into books. I know about the games but since the first two were only on PC and Xbox, that kind of made them inaccessible to me. I haven't played the third game that is available on PS4, Soma interactions with Geralt of Rivia have been limited to Soul Calibur 6 pretty much.

Thanks to a certain creatively bankrupt director whose name I shall not mention, I haven't been that much of a Henry Cavill fan. And then hearing the multiple racial changes for political correctness I wasn't that enthused about the show... it's supposed to be based on a fictional version of a northern European style area so it wouldn't make sense why there would be people of color there, but diversity quotas... At worst, all I could think of was if that Person of Color was replacing a Ginger or not...  but since I haven't read the books I won't know until I read them.

I also must admit that I spent most of the first episode staring at cables mouth just to make sure that he wasn't digitally shaved. My whole plan was to watch the show and a mock the hell out of it I was pretty much expecting it to be crap... but, alas, it was not...

By the end of the eight Episode this was me:

And I'm trying to locate the books and the third game.
I practically binged the entire show in one night and I normally don't do that... Geralt got in the way of my Zodak yelling: "Boi!" Time...

If you haven't seen it, what are you still doing here!? Go watch the Witcher... and toss him a coin or two!

Street Fighter 6 rumors: What I'd like to see

There are rumors of SF6 Showing up in 2021. I'm not sure how realistic this is. But after the mess that was Street Fighter V, I think we should talk about fixes needed for 6.

Capcom cannot simply Focus just on e-sports tier competitive scene.  Yes, they need to make a good game. But releasing a barebones game is not the answer. We saw this with 5.

 The game needs to be on E-sports competitive level but at the same time it should be welcoming to Casual folks.

I'm not going to enter into the details on making a great e-sports level game. Instead I will talk about the modes and features that would be more interesting towards casual folks.

-Not hide EVERYTHING behind a pay-wall:
Having various unlockables available for completing certain conditions within the game can help casuals ease into it. Gets them familiarized with the game before they enter the online battlegrounds.

-characters should NEVER be Online tournament rewards:
Getting FIRST ACCESS to the character, is OK. But the character itself should never be obtained only via tourney.

Maybe giving the players who qualified for the Tournament, a special Skin with a specific Tournament color pallette.
For example: First Access to Charlie is the Tournament reward. But the FA winners get a Special pink and blueberry palette for the Shadow Charlie skin and a blue, white and Yellow Capcom palette for Normal Charlie.

Multiple game modes:
In order to remain appealing to a casual base there's a need for other game modes besides versus mode online or offline. So I shall mention a few modes that I would be interested in besides the versus mode for online and offline matches.

90s Arcade Mode:
It's  self-explanatory but for the sake of ranting I shall explain. Basically it's just like an arcade game in the 90s you Mega character fight a series of characters beat the final boss and receive a non canonical ending. Two or three still pictures and some texts like the bottom mimicking the endings from 90s arcade games.

Story mode:
Basically the canonical story for the game where you play as different characters to see the progress of the overarching story...

Street Fighter historic moments:
 as the title States the idea is to recreate certain key moments in Street Fighter history. For example the epic battle between Ryu and Sagat where were you scars the Emperor of Muay Thai.
(In gameplay mode this means a One Round Match against Sagat in the Hardest difficulty where you have to win with a Shin Shoryuken with 10% health to passthe fisht with a Rank-S.)
Or a Dan vs Sagat fight where you play as Sagat And you must block all of Dan's attacks until he beats you by block chipping damage... in order to simulate the battle between Dan and Sagat where Sagat throws the fight.

 Dramatic battles:
This is a small subsection of the historic battles where the fights are two against one...  for example the fight between Ryu and Ken vs. Bison from the animated movie and Alpha Series.  Or the Charlie and Guile vs. Bison as a tribute to the Alpha Series.

Cross Tag Battles:
This one could be also a fun competitive mode since it's basically a two on two tag battle. Think X-Men vs. Street Fighter but without the X-Men, or the hyper exaggerated moves.

Bring back ALL the Bonus Stages... from 1-3... and maybe add a new one or two.

Bring back all the characters from Street Fighter 1 all the way to Street Fighter 5. That means Geki, Joe, the two guys from the intro in 2, el Fuerte, and a couple of Final Fight 1 guys to round up the roster... (we need Cody, Guy, AND Haggar.

Basically make Street Fighter 6 the ultimate Street Fighter game and a massive love letter to the legacy of Street Fighter...

Jan 3, 2020

Home Alone Reboot is a massive ball of failure...

And it makes sense... that it'll fail, not that the reboot makes sense.
The premise of the reboot is basically this: the kid steals something from an adult couple the adult couple tries to get the stuff back but stumbles upon the carefully-planned carefully planned traps by said kid.

 FIRST of all it's not a reboot.  it's a misguided sequel and we've had like three of those.

SECOND, Home Alone is a product of its time. A home alone type of movie in this day and age where everyone is connected via internet cannot work. Cellphones, consoles, laptops, etc... the only way it could work would be if it's set in a pre-internet era and if you're going to do that just use the originals.

THIRD, what the hell is that premise!? How does that make sense as a Home Alone movie?

Look at the premises of past movies:
The Real Home Alone:
Kid is accidentally left Home Alone in a Christmas trip to France. Kid has to defend himself from a pair of burglars.
The possibly unnecessary sequel that I like:
Kid accidentally boards wrong plane and ends up in New York. He scams a Hotel in NY and is discovered. He runs away and has to defend a relative's abandoned house from the same burglars as the previous movie. (Bonus fact: in 2014, a Canadian station decided to cut scenes from this movie to fit under 2 hour of running time. Fast forward to 2019, where the President of the United States is crying like a bitch about his cameo being removed.)

Home Alone 3: the first of the pretenders:
Teen ScarJo is the closest thing to a positive thing here.
Kid accidentally discovers a terrorist plot and must defend his house from international thieves serving a North Korean Terrorist Organization while being sick with chicken pox.
What in the actual Hell!? Terrorists?

Home Alone 4: we're dropping a deuce or 20 on the franchise:
We return to The McCallisters, but a TV movie version of them...
Kevin's dad divorced and married an even richer lady and they're hosting a party for the Royal Family. He has to defend his stepmom's home from French Stewart... who is supposed to be Daniel Stern.

Home Alone 5: We're not even trying anymore...
Kid and family.move to Maine... (sadly Pennywise isn't available) gamer kid defends house from burglars.

As you can see which each passing movie the premises go crazier and crazier and stupider. Home Alone was supposed to be a standalone movie and that's it sadly both Fox and now Disney are trying to milk this franchise and there's no more milk left in it.

Jan 1, 2020

Hideo Kojima can suck on my balls: a Death Stranding rant *language*

I played Death Stranding. As of the writing of this rant I beat the game. I mention this because the Kojima Cult (who only played a couple of MGS games) think he's a god and can do no wrong. I've been there with Snatcher, Policenauts, Metal Gear (with fan translations of the MSX ROMs), Boktai, Castlevania Lords of Shadow, etc... so yeah, over 20 years of experience with "a Hideo Kojima game"... This isn't my first rodeo with Hideo's pretentiousness.

The difference between those past games and Death Stranding is that DESPITE LIMITATIONS, the previois games were FUN, ENTERTAINING, AND ENJOYABLE... the things that make a game, well... a game!
The 8th definition of the word is dedicated to videogames... and it includes the word FUN, which can only be used with the term Death Stranding when the words "is not" are between "Stranding" and "fun".

The graphics are pretty to look at but that's the standard in a hideo Kojima game. We get to see way too much of Norman Reedus and his funky fetus... and pretty much everyone else in the class has 90% of the time shown as a hologram... or chirogram as they call them in the game.
Conan O'Brien, Guillermo del Toro, Dorito Pope, Jordan Vogt-Roberts, etc. Are pretty much all holograms in the game and it feels more like Hideo is patting himself on the back for meeting and working with them. It almost feels like Hideo is all: "ROOK AT ME I AM HANGING WITH CEREBRITIES!"
I know, That's racist! and all that, but I'm mocking Hideo's pretentiousness...

The story so far is pretty much a Hideo Kojima story. Zero subtlety, Predictable, full of Kojima's quirks, and with a Shyamalan twist so telegraphed that even Ray Charles could've seen it coming.
Seriously you get the usual Kojima bullshit here:
 pop culture references, contrived plot, criticism of American jingoism, government conspiracy, philosophical questions about Humanity, self, community, massive information dump near the end of the game, you know those things he has done better in past games.

The cult calls this story mind-blowing... it's not bad but it's not Hideo's best. The only way this game is mind-blowing is on how mind-numbingly boring it is... this story blows her mind if you haven't played some of Kojima's classics.
This so-called depth that this game supposedly has is as shallow as a kiddie pool. Pretty much every character is named after what they do or their significance to the game. Let's take Sam Porter Bridges or Sam strand as an example:
The guy who stalked to reconnect America is basically Named Sam Porter Bridges...
Porter: the guy who carries luggage
Bridges:  structures used to connect one point to another across an obstacle.
Sam, the luggage carrier that connects people across obstacles... So, so deep... now let's give him a fear of being touched by others because OH SO FUCKING DEEP!!
Steand is basically a bit oof rope. If you connect it with another rope you tie a knot... Subtlety has been raped to death with Hideo's 3 inches of DOOM!!  Thank goodness is the high point of the game.

 Gameplay is the weakest point of death stranding. it literally is go from point A to point B to deliver a package then return back to point A in order to go from point A to point C: lather, rinse, and repeat. I see you go through the story mode you get ways to improve your travels but they are not necessarily fun.  Eventually you get vehicles but there are rocks everywhere and even the tiniest Pebble can make your vehicle shake a lot and your cargo gets damaged. And there's dealing with terrorists and mules, who basically want to steal your cargo and your defense options are very limited.  Then you have the BTs...  basically basically dead people that want to toss you into a tar pit. You beat them by going menstruating female at them and soaking them in your blood...  or pee when you want to feel spicy!
Sure, you get vehicles later on, but there's rocks everywhere and a tiny pebble can make your vehicle jiggle more than the breasts of a Dead or Alive contestant.
They'll make you either loose packages or get them way too damaged.

Trekking from point A to point B can be pretty annoying and frustrating.  as you gather more cargo you will lose your balance a lot and the game turns into a torture that reaches QWOP levels of annoyance.  There is no enjoyment. The only reason I'm actually playing the game is just to see the ending.  The game feels more like a chore than a game. In fact there is not much other than delivery missions.

But: YoU aRe ToO dUmB tO UnDeRsTaNd DeAtH sTrAnDiNg! StIcK tO cAlL oF dUtY!!
Is the moronic replies from the cult when one criticizes the GAMEPLAY as DS's biggest problem.
Almost everything about death stranding is very simplistic. Even the plot is a simplistic as it Gets once you remove all the bloated oral diarrhea and Kojima pretentiousness.
Human perseverance good! Together we are stronger than alone! The bonds we make help us overcome obstacles. Stand tall, face your fears and push forward... That is the Human way!

 The so-called master piece story is basically a compilation of Hideo's greatest hits. Meaning of the gameplay elements feel like watered-down versions of metal gear solid 5 gameplay. A Rehash of the Liquid Ocelot fight and story ideas touched upon better in previous games.

As much as we can despise Konami,  they were a necessary evil.
 death stranding is to Hideo Kojima what the Phantom of Menace is to George Lucas...  and speaking of George Lucas, Kojima has the same problem that Lucas had in the prequel era: they were both surrounded by yes-men that were afraid to say NO to them.

I don't like Death Stranding and it's not that "I can't understand it"... it simply isn't this "mind-blowing masterpiece" that people claim it is. So, if Hideo thinks that I should play Call of Doody because I didn't like his Amazon Prime simulator, he can suck on my balls.

Odds and ends Jan 1. 2020... Thundercats, Fake She-Ra, and stuff...

Well, well, well... 2020 is here... I feel old! Living in 5 decades hwile BEING UNDER 40 is incredibly Stressful! And yes I'm aware of my spelling of while.
But I have a funny Tale. Remember Noelle Stevenson's pop cultural appropriations of She-Ra?  Mattel made some dolls and they're now on clearance!!

It's actually quite simple Tumblr does not buy products.  they may watch the show but at the moment of buying merchandise they buy Jack Shit. It doesn't help that Mattel did a subpar job with them. And that they let the property be hijacked by tumblrinas... ( I understand DreamWorks is mostly to blame for this but that's not the point)  the point here is that merchandise for a children's cartoon failed and it's going to hurt Mattel big time!

 Hopefully the horrible 5.5 figures won't fail big time, otherwise this would mean the death of He-Man...

Super7 revealed their new Thundercats figures: Mumm-Ra the ever-living who comes with Ma-Mutt. Tygra watch own but no Wilykat this time around. They showed grune the Destroyer and I almost want him for the broken Sword of Omens... Pumyra looks like shit though...

Pumyra will come with:
Sling with bombs
Totem of Dara
Extra head
Extra hands...
She also has new legs that are supposed to make her look less tall but we've seen the issues with Super 7 and female figure so she'll probably be a midget.

Grune has a buttload of stuff
Extra head (flashnack)
Extra hands
Alternate armor to show him as a Thundercat (flashback)
Seal of Grune whole and broken
His club
His knuckledusters
And like I mentioned the Broken Sword of Omens...

I can now see why they went with a living version of Grune even though I would prefer a spirit version of him.
A 14in translucent spirit version of him and a matching Jaga would be awesome.

And Tygra seems like the most basic of the bunch...  here's hoping the wikykat rumors are false.
He has
3 Bolo whips:
Closed, open, and one with real string...
 extra head
 extra hands
I'm a bit disappointed that he doesn't come with a silky or the fruit from the garden of delights...

Mumm-Ra as you can see, comes with Ma-Mutt... but the fuck that needs to shut up is nowhwre to be seen.
 well Mumm-Ra comes with
Fully extended sword of Plun-Darr
Extra head
Extra hands
Soft cape (probably shitty cloth)
Mighty Gyroscope Regulator
Key of Thundera
And I'm not sure what the hell are those nipple thing that are in the picture.

I mentioned a couple days back that I was only interested in Mumm-Ra and Tygra still stands but Grune is almost tempting...

Happy 2020, folks! I might be taking it easy in the next few days cuz I really need a break...  I'm thinking I'm going to take a walk with the old man...