Jan 31, 2022

Ben 10 MOTU returns in March...

 The second Season of Mighty No.9 vs Mega Man returns on March 3. Some toys have spoiled characters like Man-E-Faces, who looks kinda like Man-E-Faces, with a cloth loincloth and a botched action feature. (Seems like his faces change vertically instead of horizontally.)

Stratos looks like The Falcon. Or Teela's dad. He no longer is a flying Monkey.

2 well now 1 MOTU cartoon,  3 toylines, a "live action movie coming soon" and I feel nothing other than disappointment and anger. I SHOULD BE HAPPY that we're getting a shit ton of MOTU stuff. My issue is that what we're getting is not up to snuff. 

We know my mixed feelings towards Origins: 
I cannot say that the line is good, because it's a step down from Classics, but I can't say it's a complete trainwreck, because on paper it's a great idea. Execution MIGHT be a bit lacking, but it hits certain notes on Nostalgia. Nearly bought a Castle Grayskull yesterday... but the $113 price tag helped me snap back to reality. 

The MOTU Minis ARE a thing, even if I don't care much about them. I mention it for the sake of transparency but I'm not even counting it as an actual toy line.

The "MOTUC KILLER" LINE has been a HUUUUUUUUGE Disappointment, I am of course referring to Masterverse. I've already thought about the issues of disappointing sculpt and awkward paint (or lack of) as issues that make Masterverse an inferior product next to MOTUC. Since the person in charge of Masterverse is the same incompetent buffoon who botched the engineering in MOTUC, it's not surprising that he's delivering an inferior product.

Then we have the Playmates toyline... wait, that's a Mattel Toyline!? The Nu-He-Man toyline is not made by Playmates... it just looks that cheap. While yes, the 80s toys were "cheap" they weren't "cheap looking". The Basic WWE figures are "for kids" but they don't "look cheap". Just because the line is super stylized doesn't mean that an inferior product must be delivered.

On the cartoons, I've already commented on how Revelation went from OK to massive shitshow, but that was a one-off miniseries that won't come back. The other show, despite not being accurate to the Source Material, felt more MOTU than the "show made by old school fans for old school fans". It's kinda hard to get excited about MOTU when it feela thar the people in charge don't have a clue on what makes the property work and are desperately tossing everything to see what sticks.
I'm aware that it SOUNDS like I'm gatekeeping. Which I kinda am, but not completely. I just want the end product to be respectful to what came before. I want the product to walk the path between new and familiar while remaining respectful. 
Before anyone mentions the identity crisis MOTU had on its origins as an argument in favor for the current identity crisis, just shut the hell up! The identity crisis of the 80s helped MOTU carve its path in popular culture. It allowed for the establishment of a property for 30+ years. Unlike Hasbro's GI Joe, whose original line was rather "lackluster" in the lore department and the 30 year reboot brought the lore we know today, MOTU had some conflicting continuities, but the 80s ironed out most of the issues. 2002 came and showed, storywise, the potential of MOTU as a revived property. (Until Mattel's incompetence and Cartoon Network's backstabbing) by the time MOTU reached 30, it already had a strong continuity... 7 years later a mediocre writer had a good idea, executed poorly, thus the Neitlichverse was born. It tried to turn all conflicting continuities of the 80s into a brand new continuity that is almost coherent.

But these 2 new versions of MOTU have strayed from the path so much that they don't resemble MOTU. Revelation had a good idea: What would be of Eternia if He-Man and Skeletor were no more. Sadly they wasted it on late 20s Teela throwing a childish tantrum. While Filmation Teela was a bit of a hothead she was supposed to be 17-20-ish.  There was a study that said thar male brains mature at 25 while women did so at 21... so, it makes sense for a 19 year old Teela to have a tantrum, not so much in her late 20s. Then the show devolves into a Power of Grayskull hot potato where everyone and their mother becomes He-something or Sorceress with a disappointing ending.
Using Fisto for a 
Fisting joke... how original...

Then the other show manages to meld the Jungle He-Man with the Adam He-Man a bit better than Neitlich the "pro" writer did, but it takes a shit on everything else... it's *I* have the power, not we... Duncan is Teela's (adoptive) dad not another peer.

I know that I've had mixed reactions with this  cartoon. It's not MOTU, but it's a good show... if one ignores how it butchers MOTU. It has far more liberties than say, Filmation for the action sequences and continuity. The 3DCG Animation allows for a slightly faster production than hand drawn animation. (3D has its share of issues, but theoretically it is faster to animate than 2D.) My sole reason for hating the CGI Netflix MOTU is that aside some names, the show isn't very MOTU-Like.
If the show was a bit more traditional MOTU, say: NO Power Sharing, Teela and MAA having a familial bond and the show was Adam trying to fit in the Palace life with Teela and Krasstine helping along the way and Cringer being the comedic relief, I wouldn't have that many issues with it.

 The idea of Skeletor being a Grayskull Powered Keldor would've lent itself for a different dynamic to the He-Man vs Skeletor struggle. Sadly, this show won't be the place to explore that. But this is not the place for that.

I cannot be excited for MOTU because the product delivered has missed the mark too much past my tolerance levels. I WISH I could be excited for the MOTU stuff that is coming, but all I've been is disappointed that it's all wrong.

The Netflix movie COULD BE good... but being realistic, I'd expect garbage based on the past two Netflix takes on MOTU being too unMOTU, Netflix not having a Triple A Hollywood studio budget, questionable casting choices, and the usual Mattel dumbassery. (Every day this blog gets further away from those Mattel free samples.) I've said it before, but I'll do it again:
It feels like MOTU is slipping away from me. It's being transformed, no, corrupted into something that it is not MOTU. My first real toyline, my first hero is being taken away from me as a pale imitation takes its place... All I have is his past, memories of his former gloriousness... memories that are getting duller because of how jaded I'm becoming.

Losing family to the Gaze of Haley Joel Osment is one thing... losing friends to life as we drift away is another thing, but when even my favorite fictional characters drift away and become unrecognizable, that's what hurts me the most... real people come and go... Fictional Characters are supposed to be the one thing that shouldn't leave me... but somehow, the powers that be want to take that away from me... I feel like everything is slipping away and it scares me. With me having to take new responsibilities and treading unfamiliar territory all over while going blindly without any safety nets is terrifying. With everything around me changing so fast, I need something stable to seek refuge, something familiar...
See where I'm going? He-Man, Thundercats, Ninja Turtles, GI Joe, She-Ra, these are some of my tethers to a sense of normalcy. They have saved me more times than I can count and it hurts me to see them defiled by their own masters.

So that is why I feel that in a way it would be better to let MOTU die than be defiled as it is now... I wish the movie is good enough to bring back my He-Man,  but I'm afraid of it running everything...

Jan 29, 2022

Netflix MOTU movie has a new He-Man

 And the plot for the movie sounds bad. Basically Adam is iseaki'd to Eternia... or was that a previous draft from the time Noah Centineo was attached... apparently we have a new Champion of Eternia. He appeared on the Steven Spielberg version of West Side Story.

Some dude named Kyle Allen is the New He-Man. I have no idea if he's a good actor because I have thing jack squat of stuff with him on it.

But there have been some rumors going on with MOTU that sound scary. Many of them stem from a comment about the Nee brothers making an irreverent take on MOTU. The worst of them was that Adam would be living a normal life on Earth having a shitty office desk job like an accountant and that things would get crazy whenever his "tick" said the magic words.

Now, with the official announcement of the New He-Man and the whole "Adam discovers he's the prince of a faraway land" thing scares me. It could be set on a fantasy world, or they could cram modern Earth...

But Netflix is involved... do I need to remind everyone about Death Note? Just keep Kevin Smith and Ted Biaselli as far away as possible. Otherwise we get this garbage


I'm reaching the point where I'd rather have no movie and let MOTU die before it gets butchered beyond recognition.

Jan 28, 2022

Playmates toys is ass backwards

Says the guy who just bought a differentBillie Eilish action figure after bitching about the Noob Saibot Bukkake Billie Eilish. The figure is from the video When the Party is Over


Sadly, The figure is after she consumes Noob Saibot's semen, but not as much as the other figure where she was a victim of Netherrealm Bukkake. Is it too much to ask for a normal Billie Eilish action figure.

The only reason I'm getting this Billy Eilish action figure is a modern take of an old joke of mine. My old NECA Mirage Michelangelo had a fling with a custom figure of Miley Cyrus that I made many years ago. Since Miss Cyrus is old news and Billie Eilish kind of looks like a mutant Goldeen, well it kind of makes sense, or at least it Does in my warped mind. 

I shouldn't be using Super7 to make this Match. This should have been a purely Playmates crossover but it isn't. Why? Because Playmates is doing things ass backwards with their toylines.

Oh sure, they have the new Cobra Kai figures that look like ass and the turtles are reissues of the 10-14 years ago TMNT Classics that they keep pushing every few years... between "special anniversary releases" of the 80s toys. Their TMNT Game has been lacking for quite some time. Yes, I praised their Classics Rocksteady and Bebop despite their sculpt and Articulation issues, of course NECA came in and wrecked Playmates with the Toon Rocksteady and Bebop but Super7 made all Bebop and Rocksteady their bitches.

I'm not asking for 2022 Articulation since Super7 managed to do TMNT Justice with 1995 Articulation. They look like their 1987-1994 counterparts, but enhanced due to their larger size and articulation. Take Muckman and you can see what I mean, despite any issues I may have with Super7, they SEEM to put a lot of care on the TMNT figures. Playmates seems content with reissuing 10-35 year old figures and call it a day. If they feel generous they might change a cut joint to a ball/hinged joint.

Playmates just got back the Star Trek license and guess what they're doing? 1990s looking figures in the same scale as the 1990s toyline ith himge joints turned into ball hinges. Riker and Data look nothing like Jonathan Frakes and Brett Spiner respectively. Piccard kinda looks like Patrick Stewart, but all bald white man figures that are NOT Lex Luthor kinda look like him. I don't mind sharing scale throughout the decades...Hasbro has with the Joes for nearly 40 years. My issue would be if Hasbro's 2022 Scarlett looked EXACTLY like this:

Scarlett from the yojoe archive.

Despite the technological advances that allow female figures to have longer hair without impeding Articulation, Playmates' logic demands short hair on the figure. 

They have the Miraculous Ladybug line and only dolls are being released. I know someone did action figures of Miraculous, but that was like 7 years ago... seems that Playmates isn't doing Ben 10 anymore. According to their website they have:
Godzilla vs. Kong
Billie Eilish
Miraculous 
TMNT vs Cobra Kai
Spy Ninjas
Pikwik Pack
Vlad and Niki
Star Trek being the newest addition.

-The GvK stuff looks like 1997 toys.
-Pikwik pack is a Preschool show. And the toys look very Happy Meal-like. 
-Vlad and Niki are two siblings too young to have a YouTube channel, yet their parents are exploiting them as some sort of stars that ended up getting a toyline. The toys look like glorified Happy Meal toys.
-Spy Ninjas is... I have no idea what the hell this is, but apparently, they're YouTubers that foght evil hackers and they do Scooby Doo shit... I coild describe it as Retarded Powerless Rangers... I'm sorry if people white knighting people with intellectual disabilities or people with actual intellectual disabilities got offended by my usage of the word "retarded", but it's the only word that carried the weight to match the awfulness of these Spy Ninjas.
-Billie Eilish The dolls look OK, but I'm not one to be interested in buying them. I stopped doing the doll thing when Hannah Montana's jacket disintegrated. The action figures, well... I already reviewed one and swore I would never buy another Billie Doll... yet here we are.
-TMNT I've beaten this horse to death.  Back then The Classics TMNT figures showed innovation and a desire to play with the big boys... Rocksteady and Bebop showed that Playmates would rather cut as many corners as possible... Not gonna lie, I'm still mad at them for canceling their Mirage Splinter for the 25th anniversary.
It's sad, that the company that once toppled He-Man and usurped His position in Toy Royalty has been reduced to a joke that can't even manage to make a decent TMNT Line. Couple of waves, mutations, minis, reboot in a few years. Then there's the million turtle variants. I mean. These past few years have been the same four turtle sculpts in "toon inspired colors", movie inspired colors with different belts and head, second movie versions with new heads, mirage versions, with different belts, and now the Cobra Kai versions. They had the potential at something awesome, but they squandered it. TMNT is literally their bread and butter, yet sonehow they manage to screw it up.

Star Trek has potential, but their laziness will be detrimental to the final products. The excuse is that they make these toys for kids... but let's face the truth, what kids will be interested in a 35 year old show? I'm using TNG as a reference, since some of the figures seem to be TNG... also TNG was the last kid friendly Star Trek series. The fact that Playmates is going for pseudo retro figures is pure laziness, nothing else. 

It SEEMS like Playmates makes ⅛ of effort, whenever it has some media tie-in. For example, when Rise of the TMNT was around, they kinda put a bit of effort on the toys. They still cut a lot of corners. Like Michelangelo, they made the sculpt LOOK like the character and the figure has SOME articulation, but they cut corners on the paint applications. April, not only she doesn't look like the cartoon, she's missing paint applications and her glasses. Now that Rise is over what do they do? They dust off some molds from 1992 and rerelease a bunch of figures that I bought at $4.99 each, with a set of 6 at $39.99 putting each figure at $6.67... it doesn't sound like a huge increase, but the molds were made 30 years ago, the sculptors were paid 30 years ago. They're made in China, so producing these is a lot less than a dollar per unit, freight might be the only thing that would eat a big chunk of the figures' price, but Playmates is all about of spending less to maximize profits, so they're profiting a lot for so little effort. Sorry, that was the price for the mirage set. The vintage toy sets were $190 for 12 figures, which puts the price per figure at $15-ish.

I know, I know, that's capitalism. Problem is that we're getting older and the ones who fall for those stunts are a dwindling population. Kids who grew in 2k3 are reaching their 20s. Kids who grew up with 2k12 are in their mid to late teens.

Both NECA and Super7 are catering to ME, the late-30s to mid-40s crowd. NECA hits the spot with accuracy to other media (1990s movies and the Fred Wolf Studios Cartoon) Super7 is doing what Playmates should've been doing for their TMNT Classics and delivering larger scale toys based on the vintage line but updated for modern sensibilities. They are making an effort to make appealing products. I'm NOT seeing this with Playmates.

Hell, since they're so Hellbent on only throwing Vintage stuff at us, how about putting a little more effort:

How about "TMNT 87' The Lost Waves series"?

A continuation of the Vintage line with old and new faces. 
Wave 1:
Mirage Leo
Mirage Raph
Mirage Don
Mirage Mike
Karai
Scratch 
Mirage Casey
Mirage April
Mirage Splinter
Shredder Elite Soldier

The Mirage Turtles are the original Turtles with new belts in Mirage colors. (Brown belts, pads, red bandanas)
Karai is a kitbash of Ninja April without shoulderpad with Mitsu's arms and a cloth vest all painted in Karai colors.
Scratch is a repaint of the vintage toy. Instead of the old school Black and white striped uniform, he'd get the modern striped uniform in orange and white. His fur would be more brownish and the shoes black. His accessories would be neon green. The reason is to avoid scammers trying to sell 2023 Scratch as 1993 Scratch.
Mirage April is April 2 in Mirage Blue suit and brown boots
Mirage Casey is Casey in Mirage colors and brown accessories
Mirage Splinter is a rerelease of the previous Mirage Splinter.
Shredder Elite Soldier is a Foot Soldier repainted in Mirage colors but with a new Shredder elite guard head. Traditional ninja weapons from shredder fogure would be his accessory.

Wave 2:
Armaggon
Mirage Shredder
Mirage Foot Soldier
Mirage Fugitoid
Mirage The Boy
Aska

Armaggon is a new sculpt.
Mirage Shredder is a repaint of Shredder with the head repainted in true mirage fashion (no helmet brows, face is in shadows around the eyes)
Mirage foot soldier is a repainted moviestar foot soldier in Mirage Colors.
Mirage fugitoid is Fugitoid in white and silver
Mirage the boy is a new sculpt (partially reusable for Zach the 5th Turtle)


I am referencing the cartoon for colors only, since Mirage is black and white.
Aska is the head and torso of Mitsu with the arms and legs of Ninja April.

Wave 2 seems a little on the short side: that's because I have to add Mandatory Turtle variants: 
Traditional Ninja TMNT:
Torso and legs would be new and shared with all 4 turtles. (Baggy ninja gi and pants with ninja tabi) The arms would be reused from the Shogun Turtles without the vac Metal. Leo gets shogun Leo arms, Raphael gets shogun Raphael arms,  etc. For the heads they get the storage shell heads, but swapped around: Leo gets Raph, Mike gets Don, Raph gets Mike, and Don gets Leo. Each turtle gets a big scarf that also finctions as belt, sling, or mask.

Wave 3:
Zach the 5th Turtle
Attila
Rasputin
Robotic Bebop
Robotic Rocksteady

Zach is The Boy with a new head and new accessories 
Attila and Rasputin are repaints of the other two Punk Frogs woth new weapons 
Robotic Bebop and Robotic Rocksteady are gunmetal grey (not chromed) redecos of the originals with translucent weapons.

The final 5 figures are variants:
OG Line styled Next Mutation.
All 4 turtles get new arms and legs (same mold used on all 4) new belts for each turtle. Donny and Mike get half assed painted masks because Playmates needs to save money for the all new tooled Venus.

I tried to be lazy as modern playmates and reuse stuff up the wazoo. My part reuse was almot Mattel-like. I put some "second chances" at hard to find figures from the original line. Repainted to reduce chances of potential scams. I added Mirage variants of some characters because it was something we didn't get on the original. Not only that but I was able to "make some new characters viable" by the way of kitbash. Some newly tooled characters were unavoidable and they make it look like Playmates is ½ assing things instead of their modern usual ⅛. If the line gains traction, then Playmates could "vintagize" 2003, 2012, and even Rise of the TMNT... if Jim Lee stuff and Suupaa Taatorazu made it to the original line, tossing the rest of the TMNT multiverse into the vintage line is not a crazy idea... 

Now I know that you'll say that my "lost waves" go against my complaint with Star Trek.  You're correct... from a certain point of view. I dislike that Playmates is using "kids" as their excuse to be lazy with these Trek Figures. I'd rather have them take the Hasbro approach: same scale, updated sculpt and articulation, OR go full vintage, as my "lost waves" idea. (Same articulation style, same level of detail) 

If Playmates bothered to make an actual effort, we could've had a Marvel Legends equivalent for TMNT... It's sad to see Billie Eilish action figures get the treatment that TMNT Deserves.

Maybe it's time for nickelodeon to rethink the TMNT toy contract with Playmates...

Jan 27, 2022

It came from the Toy Chest: Dr. Alan Grant

 

This MIGHT BE the final Amber Collection figure and it's depressing... I knew we weren't going to get Gerry Harding... The Veterinarian who was checking the sick Triceratops... also, father of Sarah Harding... Julianne Moore in The Lost World... who we aren't getting either. Don't get me started on Jurassic Park 3 stuff...
I need to get a JP1 Raptor and a JP3 Alan Raptor... but let's get back to Dr. Grant... you thought I was going to say Alan!!didn't you?
Muldoon: We should kill them all...
Hammond: The guests?
Muldoon: No, the Raptors...
Sattler:Wait Raptors as in Veloci?
Muldoon: Yeah, those sumbitches are crafty.
Grant: Holy Mother of God...
Hammond: Technically, Daughters of bitches,  Robert...
Malcolm: *Goldblum mating noises*
Muldoon: Can someone tell Brundlewank to stop yanking it. These Velociraptors are super horny!
Grant: Liar! Velociraptors have no horns!
Sattler: Who dropped yogurt on my legs...
Malcolm: *Horny Goldblum noises*


Doctor Alan Grant is a Paleontologist who is hired by John Hammond to get an endorsement for Jurassic Park. Alan Grant (in the movies) hates children. In the novel, he likes them... in this toyline, well Mattel screwed us over and gave us no kids... they also screwed over Martin Ferrero, but that's a different story. NES??? Well, Let's say that Dr. Grant is more like The Doomguy on an Easter Egg hunt while blowing up Dinosaurs left and right.

Everyone and their mother praise the OG Genesis game, but MY JP experience is with the NES version.
A 70s movie inspired poster with a tribute to the NES game hidden in plain sight.


Articulation
We have seen the male body in action. Grant offers no real difference in articulation in comparison to Malcolm or Muldoon. Diverticulitis and he has it works for most of the Dr. Grant themed displays. Sadly most of them require a Lex and a Tim which we do not have. 
4.5
Grant: Say Alan! one more time... I frigging dare you!
Valerie: Wait is that grandpa Clyde's tiny claw?
Susan: Holy crap! It is!!


Paint and sculpt 
He doesn't look like Sam Neil circa 1990. He looks like a 1989 concept of a  40+ year old Michael J Fox. Other than that the figure looks pretty good. There are no issues with the paint on my figure luckily. 
4.5
Sattler: Look at me! I'm on a motherfucking dinosaur!!
Malcolm: Why, uh, why am I not uh, allowed to ride, Rode Sattler, with uh, Sattler?
Grant: YOU KNOW WHY! DON'T MAKE ME FEED YOUR DICK TO THE RAPTORS
Sattler: Suck it, Crisp Rat!!


Accessories
Extra head sans hat
Removable glasses
Flare (same as Malcolm)
Extra gripping hand
Fossilized Velociraptor Claw grip hand.

He has plenty of accessories, but Muldoon spoiled me with the idea of a removable hat.
I mean, I can use his glasses as a prop but not his head which was a much more important accessory to the character.
5.0

Overall
Doctor Grant gets a 4.67 as his final score. The articulation and likeness issues are what kept the figure from scoring higher. It's a shame that Mattel cut the line short before completing at least the core roster from the original movie.
Mattel killed the line, Deal with it!!


Jan 25, 2022

It came from the Toy Chest: SHOOT HER! SHOOT HER!!

 

Big ass reference to Jurassic Park's opening scene...

My original plan was to save this review and the upcoming Alan Grant review for the Advent calendar. Sadly, the news of Amber Collection being dead, pushed the reviews a lot sooner. I was hoping that Mattel would have released a Donald Gennaro figure so I could have made a recreation of the T-Rex scene in the night thing. Malcolm with the flare, T-Rex eating Gennaro... Well, that ain't happening now.

This clip also has the cattle prod that they gave to the action figure, because guns are bad, mmkay?
Cattle prod or SPAS-12 Shotgun?
Which do you prefer?
My choice is SPAS-12 all the way.


Robert Muldoon was the game warden of Jurassic Park. He often butted heads with Hammond on the topic of Velociraptors. In the movie universe he dies... like Gennari. In the book he lives, like Gennaro. Malcolm and Hammond died in the book, but survived in the movie... Malcolm's survival forced the book to be retconned. Getting off topic, let's talk Muldoon:


Articulation
Muldoon sports the standard JP Amber Collection articulation. Due to his clothing is articulation is very similar to talk to Sattler... but in a male body, of course. Unlike my Sattler figure, Muldoon has full range waist articulation. He has slightly better ankle articulation since they made the boots in two parts, but I believe the better articulation was accidental.
4.5
Muldoon: What in the hell is she doing?
Susan: That's Valerie, she's a nympho and is often getting herself off...
Muldoon: Clever girl...
Susan: Damn straight!


Paint and sculpt
Muldoon looks nothing like Bob Peck. The figure kind of looks like a crossover between Christopher Eccleston and Pee-wee Herman. Paintwise he fares pretty well except on the eyes. The "clever girl head" has a slight case of derp eye... but the issue is that the tampos for the eyes look off.
4.0
Muldoon: What are you doing?
Susan: What does it look like?
Muldoon:Like you're raping me and the other velociraptor...
Valerie: *ahem!*
Muldoon: Valerie the Velociraptor gets to watch...
Valerie: That's  be... waitaminute! What does it mean that I get to watch!? SUSAN!! This wasn't part of the deal!
Susan: Shut up, Valerie!
Nefty: there once was a site full of JP erotic fanfics with dinosaurs having sex with humans. The site is long gone now.



Accessories
Extra Clever Girl head
Extra hands
Cattle prod
Removable hat

The removable hat makes me wish that Hammond and Grant had removable hats.
The lack of SPAS-12 Shotgun is a huge disappointment... luckily I found a French Ebay seller that had SPAS-12 SHOTGUN in 1:12 scale, PERFECT for Jurassic Park figures.
4.5 
Part Chris Eccleston part Pee-wee Herman...


Overall
Muldoon gets a 4.33 as his final score. His score would have been a little bit higher had he had gotten his SPAS-12 Shotgun. I kinda understand why they didn't... I mean it's not as horrible as McFarlane giving Jason Todd Gun Fingers, but it kinda sucks that I had to spend more money on French Third party items... it's not a slight against France as a country, my issue is that I had to pay for more shipping since the item came from the old world to the new world.

Random toy thoughts January 2022

 I'm collecting a few random thoughts here because the topics might not be big enough for individual rants:

Mattel's Jurassic World Amber Collection:
To this day, I've no idea what's happening with that line. I see you may know, my main focus on this line has been humans from the first movie. That's mainly because it's the only thing Mattel has released in the human Department. Also a Crisp Rat, but screw him. The lost world and Jurassic Park 3 have received zero human representation. 

Apparently the Amber Collection is done with Grant and Muldoon being the final figures. The line will be rebranded as Hammond Collection 
Grant, Sattler, and Malcolm will be the first humans for that line. I don't know if these will be redecos from Jurassic Park or if they're 6 inch super articulated Jurassic World Dominion versions of them. If it's the latter, it would be interesting. 

This scares me because I only need Gennaro, Wu, and the Murphy Siblings: Lex and Tim to complete my JP humans. It would be a MASSIVE DICK MOVE to cancel the line without having the last 4 remaining characters.

On the Dino side, rumors have a Gallimimus coming in 2022... Hopefully they rerelease the Dilophosaur. Wouldn't mind a Triceratops with the big pile of shit.

If my logistics weren't compromised due to the Greater Responsibilities, I'd ask for Vehicles.

If the 6 inch figures look bad, these look even worse...

Hasbro's G.I. Joe: Classified series:

Stalker and the Crimson Twins have been revealed. Stalker looks like a modified BeachHead body with some webgear and a Military scarf that looks pretty cool. The Scarf was what sold me on Stalker. It gives a bit of a Venom Snake vibe to him.
The Crimson twins look just as expected, but their faces remind me of someone who wouldn't let his likeness be used on a toy out of fear of Xenu stealing his soul or some Scientologist thing... Not going to name any Deeply Closeted Homosexual men of my stature with an Asymmetrical smile that might have jumped on a couch for Joey from Dawson's Creek. There's also a "vintage wave" that will release redecos of Classified figures in a slightly more vintage accurate style. Gung Ho, Lady Jaye, Destro,  and the Baroness are the figures on this wave. Out of these four I'm only interested in Destro.

Hasbro's Power Rangers Lightining Collection:
After missing out on Finster and the Ninjetti Rangers my interest is waning. Also, since a lot of the product is aimed at fans of seasons that I don't care about, I can rest my wallet for a bit. Hopefully the last 2 Dino Thunder Rangers get a release... Not gonna lie, I might be tempted by a Mesogog, Elsa, and Zeltrax.

Super7:
Waiting sucks... it's been over 2 years of waiting for Mumm-Ra the ever-living and Tygra. Cheetara is taking it slow, and don't get me started on James Earl Jones... is the Conan line still alive? I honestly have no clue how they will tackle Krang's Android body, or the Lunataks.

NECA:
I'm kinda losing interest in the Gargoyles line. I barely got Goliath and I'm not sure if I will continue after Demona... if I get her.
I never saw any of the Defenders of the Earth figures, nor was able to order a Phantom. 
Honestly, the only thing I might get from them is the Mousers I pre-ordered a while back, Usagi, Keno, any Movie figures... Hopefully I can get the barn April and Casey. 
Neca REALLY needs to rerelease Irma, a normal nom-bobble head April, and Casey.


Jan 23, 2022

Random thoughts that keep me awake past dawn: sci fi stuff...

 I have no idea how to start this but I have questions:

Cryogenic Prisons: What's the point? You ice the crominals to release them years later? They remain in their prime, unchanged, and you're deopping them in a more advanced and usually more pacifist world, not ready for that kind of mayhem. 

Clones: You take cells of say, a 39-year old guy. Put them in a tube, bada bing bada boom you have a 39-year old looking guy that happens to be 1 day old. Now thanks to Science, we know that the clones cannot be put on accelerated aging and they have their genetic clock going against them. At age 1 the Clone is a 40-year old toddler. Not to mention the clone having all the knowledge of the original up until the point the DNA was extracted.

Genetic Splicing: Take Man. Take Spider. Have them meet... you know where I'm going to.
Real Life gets you GITD AIDS CATS

Time Travel: We've seen the movies, the TV shows, comics, videogames, etc. But assuming that time travel could be achieved, we need to take into consideration Earth's position in Space and universal expansion rate. Standing in your home in 2022 would probably mean floating on outer space in 1492. Now if we assume that we can do some fancy Mathematics and tether the time machine to Earth and end up in 1492... time traveling would kill the traveler. Exposing the traveler to foreign strains of bacteria and viruses, not to mention that I'd be exposing 1492 folks to foreign strains of bacteria and viruses. Same thing would apply if the traveler went to 2121.

Giant Robots: Shinji get in the Robot... save the world, jerk off on comatose girls later.
In reality, Mechs are impractical as hell. Easier target, top heavy, loud and logistically inefficient, especially in uneven terrain. I mean Our human legs fail us in uneven terrain, imagine how painful it must be for a 70 foot tall robot.

Laser blasters: pew! pew!  But real life lasers don't work like the movies. They are too big, too bulky and too invisible to the naked eye. Don't even think of asking for a more elegant weapon from a civilized age.

VR/Holodeck: Nope, don't get me started on that...

I really need to go to sleep...

What's going on with Italy and Tifa? Kinda NSFW

 Everybody is going on and on about Tifa and the Italian Senate... to the Internet!!

Oh? Oh... Oh!

The Italian Senate was on a Zoom call, when they get interrupted by a porn clip of Tifa being ridden like a Chocobo... Now I get all those Italian Senate jokes.

Censored pic after the jump. Don't click while at work or on public transportation.

Microsoft bought Activision: a rant

 Recently, Activision was bought by Microsoft. Most of the reactions were negative and with good reason. Some people still have flashbacks of Microsoft buying Rare and how Rare went down the shitter afterwards. 

They bought Bethesda and all they have done is put Bethesda games on their gamepass. There are rumors of a new exclusive IP for XBOX but not much.

Now they have Activision. The same Activision that was hit with a sexual harassment and discrimination lawsuit that led to a walkout by employees after the company started firing people from one of its smaller studios in unrelated issues. Microsoft spent nearly 69 BILLION dollars to inherit that mess. That's not mentioning how most of the Activision brands have been doing worse than earlier years...
Call of Duty hasn't been doing great in recent years...
Crash Bandicoot only had good games back when he was a Naughty Dog game.
Tony Hawk... do we need to point out that everything after Tony Hawk's Underground 2 has been absolute shit?
Spyro... has there been a good Spyro outside the original PlayStation? Back when the games were made by Insomniac...
The only IPs that Microsoft could benefit from are Overwatch, Diablo, and Call of Duty IF they force Activision to make good games instead of yearly shovelware that only sells by its name.


But my issue with this is the approach that Microsoft has taken. Yes, SONY has exclusives and has bought some studios, but most of the deals are timed exclusives and not buying companies for a single IP. Capcom can still release games on all consoles despite having an exclusivity contract with SONY for STREET FIGHTER V. They also have first dibs on games like Final Fantasy VII Remake, but KH3 is Multiplatform. 

Before I continue, I must point out that I have had worked with what was once known as the Sears Holdings Corporation, it's super low on the corporate ladder... it's  so low that I shouldn't even mention it. In fact, I'd say it's so low that the runner stopper that keeps the ladder from scraping the floor is at a higher level than I am, but I must point it out for the sake of transparency. The approach Microsoft is taking reminds me of the time that KMart bought Sears. We all know how that situation ended up. We also have seen how well Rare did after the Microsoft buyout, same with Bethesda. This COULD Backfire big time. While I'm NOT a Microsoft Fan, healthy competition is needed for the sake of innovation. Also, I feel like they paid way too much. 

Of course, the rumor mongers have taken this opportunity to pit sticker prices on companies lke Ubisoft or Rockstar Games. If these rumors are true, this would be horrible for the industry, because Monopolies create stagnation and kill Innovation. 

Mranwhile, Nintendo is going to Nintendo.

Jan 22, 2022

Super7 NEEDS to give us TMNT Accessory packs

 In the same vein of MOTU Weapon packs... I've mentioned the Character upgrade packs before, but this is not that. Those are specific to certain characters. These accessory packs should be combinations of older items and new items to upgrade displays and "revisions" to past accessories.
What do I mean by this?

Older Items repainted:
Communicators for Michelangelo
Pizza slices
Kunai
4 point shuriken

Revised items:
Opened Pizza box to fit the 8 loose slices of pizza. (Mikey's pizza box is too small to hold a whole pizza)
Larger Trashcan and sewer cover shields for Bebop and Rocksteady. In order to be in proper scale to the figures, not the vintage line. What I mean is that None of the Turtles would be able to go down a sewer whose cover is the size of Rocksteady's shield.

New Items:
Krang Communicator
Dynamite sticks
Boomerangs
Closed Pizza Box (Normal or X-tra large)

But, let's try to make 4 different accesory packs and see how we do:

Pack #1:

-Mouser:
I know that we're getting a Mouser pack, but additional Mousers never hurt anyone.

-Turtle Communicator ×
2:
Not only Michelangelo is missing one, but so is Splinter. The split is one open and one closed

-Sewer Samurai Leo Ninjato ×3:
This is not simply a set of replacement swords for Leonardo, but it can also be suitable for arming Foot Soldiers with Traditional Ninja Weaponry.

 -Kunai and 4 point shuriken ×3:
This is to have small weapons that can be used by multiple characters... I just want real 4 point shuriken to forget the dumb 5 point stars. (3 kunai and 3 shuriken)

-Pizza:
This is a TMNT line, there should be an overabundance of Pizza. Whole, sliced, large, small, you name it. For this pack, I'm going to suggest 1 whole large pizza and 2 more large Donatello slices

-Manhole covers ×2:
I've mentioned the issue earlier on this rant and on the Rocksteady review
The smallest those manholes should be is th exact diameter of a Turtle Figure... by that I mean vanilla Leo, Don, Raph, or Mike. Scale reference, Muckman's left foot. This would also be an unpainted piece of mostly flat plastic used to spice up displays. Whether on the ground or being used by a character as a makeshift weapon or shield. Also add a "handle piece" that can be plugged to the back and Rocksteady has his shield.

-Auto Defense Bots ×4:
These little Utrom defense bots have also appeared on the arcade games. On the latter, they're usually part of Krang's defense system. These wouldn't need to be articulated, just having a deactivated and an activated mode would be enough. Having them share colors with the Mousers is the most logical thing. The 4 bots should be 2 inactive and 2 active. 

-Katana slashing effects ×2:
Selecting effect to add some more dynamic options for display. As seen on import figures.

-Arrow Quiver:
Obvious upgrade for Splinter but can be used with Sewer Samurai Leo as well

Pack #2:

- Splinter's Bow and Arrow:
This one is specifically for Sewer Samurai Leo. 
The reason is that Samurai are also known for archery. Also to complement Pack#1

-Battle Damaged Mouser:
Additional Mousers are a good thing.

-Bo staff with clip-on twirling attachments:
It's abspare Bo for Donatello or other characters, the clip on twirl effects are to help in dynamic posing:

-plug in Bo poke impact effect:
Another Plug-in attachment to use with the Bo staff. Useful for dynamic displays. 

-Rocksteady sized Machete:
Yes, it's a nod to the cartoon, but at the same time keeping it kinda close to the vintage toy.

-Krang Communicator ×2:
This item will see reuse in future figures, but spares will be needed.

-Kunai and 6 point Shuriken ×3: 
Again, ninja throwables are important especially with many characters being ninjas.

-Shredder Cloth tunic with Shredder belt ×2:
The idea is to give us options to either have a more Mirage inspired Shredder with a magenta tunic, or cartoon inspired with a grey Tunic until an official Shirt wearing Shredder. The spare Shredder belt is to "fix" Splinter.

-Grenades and Dynamite sticks ×3:
This is mainly a nod towards the videogames. But throwing weapons are always a nice extra.

Pack #3:
-Boomerang ×3:
I have a feeling that Super7 might make Walkabout Sooner than Later, so in anticipation for the Mutant from the Land Down Under, this is the next best thing after a Vegemite sandwich... this is also another to multiple Ninja Turtles games.

-Bebop's Other Gun:
Aside the famous Toy based Drill Gun, Bebop has used 2 additional guns. Any one of them is welcome.

-Smoke Bomb and smoke effect:
The idea is to have a Smoke Bomb and one that is exploding to have the Ninja Vanish trick as a display option. 

-Turtle Grappling Hook ×2:
While this was Michelangelo's weapon for quite some time, this was a transportation tool for all Turtles.

-Run over Mouser from the Party Wagon:
The party wagon having just one run over Mouser is a sin. It should've been 2 as a minimum. This should fix that issue.

-Larger trashcan lids ×2:
These are trashcan lids that Bebop can hold. Also the reason they're 2 is to be used as makeshift cymbals. It's no secret that I also love cartoony violence.

- Half eaten pizza slice with hole for a Sai and the rest of said pizza: 
This is an obvious nod to the "Raphael is cool but rude" lines from the theme song. 

-Fire Extinguisher and Foam Bat:
These are nods to Secret of the Ooze. The Fire Extinguisher can have multiple uses and not be just a SOTO prop. The foam bat on the other hand can be used as a gag weapon for Casey.

Pack #4: 
- Closed Pizza Boxes ×2: 
This is a nod to the videogames as well and they could even be reused as extra accessories for Pizzaface.

-twirling nunchucks ×2:
Following the theme of dynamic effects for weapons from previous packs this time we have the nunchucks.

-Smoke Bomb and Smoke effect:
Same reason as in the previous pack.

-Rats ×3:
Mousers need rats to catch, but do you know who else needs rats? The Rat King, of course!

-Combat Cold Cuts and Yo-Yo:
Again SOTO inspired Items that can have more purpose. The cold cuts are similar to weapons from multiple Mikey variants.

- Tonfa ×2 and chained cat claw:
-Winged Tipped Javelin and dual grip blade.
-Harpoon and Boxing glove gun:
-Ninja 3 pronged Spear:
The final items of this set are nods to the Talkin' Turtles figures THAT SHOULDN'T BE MADE AT ALL ON THIS LINE. Maybe toss their heads as a secret accessory on other figures.

The idea behind these packs is to boost armamebt and add some props to spice up displays and to deliver some "fun items" from crappy variants... I wanted to mak3 fully themed sets, but that was bordering on character specific upgrade packs. So I tried to go a bit more generic and attempting to do vanilla weapons that the Foot and Hamato Clans could share. I also added some props that could have possible options. Like, I can't do a "Channel 6 Pack" because we only have April... but since I've gone in some areas beyond the Scope of the Original line, let's go beyond what I promised:

Robotic Unicycle 2 Pack:
I know  Super7 asking $55 for just two Roadkill Rodneys that will be inferior to NECA IS a sin!!
Hear me out: I'll TRY to make them Worthwhile:
They should be a smidge taller than NECA's and in Mouser colors to have that Vintage line consistency. 
The wheel wouldn't be a sphere , but kinda cylindrical more like a cylinder with extra stabilizing bits at the ends to keep it erect. Part of tweaking the designs to make them as if Playmates had made a wacky action figure of them. Think of something like this but only going forward.
The Wind-up mechanism should be on the area where the tentacles come out. I mention these things for a reason: to help you visualize an oversized Pseudo Vintage Roadkill Rodney.

For its accessories I might suggest:
Arms ×12:
Short non bendy ×4
Long bendy ×2
medium non bendy ×2 
Battle damaged (cut) ×2 with 4 extra cut ends to plug in other arms.
Pseudo vintage toy wind up "arm" ×2

"Vintage styled" black stabilizer plaque
"Modern styled High Acceleration dust trail" stand. (Similar to NECA's)

Interchangeable heads x2: (Battle Damaged and normal) 

Plug in Laser:
The vintage figure wouldn't have had the space with the wind up engineering to have an opening door with a pop out laser. (Think MOTUC RIO BLAST for this)

Slip on Electric effects:
Think Marvel Legends lightning that can be put on Turtles, April, Splinter, Bebop, etc.

Drilling effect piece ×2:
Instead of being an attachment to the head like NECA, it's 2 slightly larger dirt mounds, with a free spinning drill piece atop each. A lot less of the Roadkill Rodneys is seen to make it different from NECA.

Battle Damaged Auto Defense Bots ×4: 
each of these Bots features Damage from a specific Turtle. Like their undamaged counterparts, no articulation is required.

But I don't know the legal and logistical hurdles blocking this to happen, but a guy can dream... besides, indirect fan feedback can help them, so let's help... 


Jan 21, 2022

Haley Joel Osment has seen Meat Loaf...

 Apparently the "that" was surviving the Necrogaze of Emily Osment's brother. All jokes aside, Meat Loaf is Dead. 2022 is being a massive dick and not pulling any punches. First it removed Bob Saget and now Meat Loaf has joined the realm of the dead.


My condolences to his family and friends. I cannot say I was a fan of him. Don't get me wrong, I've listened I'd do anything for love but I won't do that countless times in my teens and college Years, but I cannot call myself a fan when the only do songs I've listened are this and Bat out of Hell... I'm trying to show restraint by not making Fight Club, or Rocky Horror Picture Show references... 


Would I go to Hell if I have his namesake for dinner?

Update:

Not only Meat Loaf is dead but High Summoner Yuna was caught dancing and it wasn't to Meat Loaf...
Who died? Comedian Louie Anderson, who was also an author, host of Family Feud, and star of his own Fox Kids animated series Life with Louie. Mr. Anderson... not related to the other MR. ANDERSON... dammit! I lost my train of thought, thank you Wachowski sisters! It wasn't until recently that I got to watch some of his comedy, so I'm not super well versed into Louoe Anderson. But you HAD to be somewhat big enough to get your own animated series that is loosely inspired by your childhood... so that's why I am dropping a mention here. Saget, Loaf, Anderson... That's your 3 right there, so cool it for a bot, 2022!!

M&M and diversity... a rant

 I've been called racist, sexist, and homophobic for criticizing the dumb changes made for She-Ra when Netflix Bastardized the series. I criticized the changes because they were being made to fill Social Justice Checkmarks instead of being for the series' sake. 

People said that I was being a paranoid bigot...
This is not a joke... They're rebooting the already diverse cast of m&m characters into "more diverse and inclusive" versions.

How the fuck do you make m&ms more inclusive!?

By removing their personalities, because they're "offensive", of course.

Green m&m lost her "sexy persona" because of offended idiots who don't know that her sexiness comes from the urban legend that "Green m&ms had aphrodisiac effects".

That's the gist of it. Everyone else got to keep their personality, except Green who lost her "sex appeal". Brown still has her bitchy bossy personality, red is still a quick witted cynic, yellow is still a bit naive, blue is still cool and Orange is still afraid of everything... to be fair, orange always gets violated by the new flavors like pretzel... everyone remained the same except for green... because "sexy while female" is bad. 

If the m&ms are going diverse, where's the wheelchair bound m&m with Lou Gehrig's disease? Or where's the chocolate m&m transitioning to Peanut m&m? It's not going to happen since rgis was just a hollow gesture for the sake of appearing "diverse" without actually doing anything.

Jan 20, 2022

It came from the Toy Chest: This toy is Garbage...

 


I mean it literally is a sentient pile of garbage thanks to improper retromutagen ooze disposal by The Shredder. I'm talking about the TMNT's tribute to The Toxic Avenger, Muckman... and Joe Eyeball. Everybody forgets Joe Eyeball.

There isn't much I can say about this figure, outside maybe how as an ignorant child, I wasted so much of my grandma's beauty products to use as Ooze substitute with the vintage figure.

We had a Mando and Grogu LONG
BEFORE we had a Mando and Grogu

Articulation
Muckman has Standard Articulation for this line. He even has a waist twist. Pleasantly surprised that his left hand didn't lose any articulation despite the sculpt. Also his leg articulation Blends really well with his sculpting.
He has a lot of trash on him and seeing it for the first time IN COLOR is amazing 


He might not have the articulation range of a Marvel Legends figure or a Japanese import, but the articulation he has Suits him well.
4.5
He's so big that his left foot,
the one with the manhole cover,
can fit an entire turtle... if only
Rocksteady's shield was this big.


Paint and sculpt
Here he fulfills the idea of Super7's ultimate figures: he looks and feels like a bigger and more articulated version of the Vintage figure. He also has an advantage over his vintage counterpart, a lot more of painted details. Areas that were left as green plastic in the original figure are painted here and you can see things that you couldn't originally on the vintage figure. Funny thing is that even this figure has some additional details that weren't painted. I keep discovering new stuff every time I look at him...
5.0
Oh look he's making Trash hands!!


Accessories:
Muckman blew most of the budget on this wave. So he only has 2 extra hands and his Super Scope 6...
Joe Eyeball is NOT an Accessory. He's a character on his own. He is now fully painted and has 3 points of articulation... and He's kinda big too...
But with that said, he feels lacking... Most people would argue for extra hands... Me? I'd argue for 2 pieces of sculpted slime to put in his holes, because we can't display him with actual ooze... without having a huge mess that is.
3.5
The twist tie is entering from the trashcan and it flows out his chest hole.
The Receipt is entering through his brain hole and coming out his mouth.


Action Feature
I don't have ooze or fancy conditioners  to use on him, BUT it seems that his action feature ACTUALLY WORKS!! The brain hole allows Slime to be poured and it cones out his mouth.
The Joe Eyeball Trashcan can hold slime and it comes out his chest cavity.
4.5
He is a big boy and holy crap!
Joe Eyeball is kinda large as well!!


Overall
Some might complain about Action Feature getting a category, but he has a functional non-intrusive feature, so I have to count it somewhere... but for the sake of fairness I will also use the traditional ratings... So here we go:
Traditionally, using the normal ratings criteria, Muckman gets a 4.33 as his final score... but looking at his action feature and taking it into consideration, his score would turn into a 4.38 which isn't a HUUUUUUUUGE difference, but in his case was beneficial. I haven't even opend up Mondo Gecko and Muckman already eclipsed the Entire toyline. Let's see what the future will bring... Y'know, Muckman's left foot has given me an idea...

Jan 19, 2022

The Book of Boba Fett another rant

 Last week's episode was problematic. Not in a social justice kind of way problematic but a storytelling way. The series is 6 or 7 episodes long and as of the moment I started writing this, only 3 have come out with the 4th a few hours away. "What's the problem?" You might ask. The answer is "Pacing". Personally, I'm enjoying the show for what it is: a strange redemption arc for Boba Fett after his pathetic brush with  "death" at the Maw of the Sarlaac. By becoming the Master of his own Destiny he's striving to change Tatooine for the better as the new Crime Boss replacing Jabba and Bib Fortuna. 

So, what happens on the show... Politics... Boba heads to town... More Politics... Oh look! An assassination attempt. Easily avoidable fight had Boba used the Jetpack. More Politics... flashbacks to Boba's time as Kevin Costner in Dances with Banthas. The Hutts show up and they show a Black Wookie... guess what happens:
Yup, more talk about Politics. Later at night we see Boba Fett in a diaper getting his ass kicked by the Black Wookie... there's also something about Boba Fett hiring Cyborg Teenagers with Attitude after he scolds a scamming water vendor... Can you see the issue yet? 3 out of 6 or 7 episodes and most of them have been talking about Politics, Spice Trading, Water Scalping... pretty much the worst part of the Prequels. Wait, I forgot Machete in Space who is the new Rancor Keeper! There was a speeder bike chase but it was forgettable...

The show can be a bit on the duller side and mostly forgettable... there is no Baby Yoda to keep you hooked. Even Boba Fett is dull and boring, which destroys the "Mysterious Badass" Image that he had built for nearly 40 years of "Legends" lore. 


Now don't get me wrong, but I like The Book of Boba Fett. My issue is that the writing is being made for a 26 episode season, but we're getting only 6 or 7 episodes... it worries me, because we might end up with a Hideo Kojima situation, where the second half of the season will be a suoer long info dump before the conclusion on episode 6 or 7.

Update

Episode 4 just dropped and it's a flashback episode... here we have Boba and Ming-Na Wen infiltrating the enemy fortress to obtain the Slave-1 ship. But halfway through the episode we have a Looney Tunes/ Tom & Jerry type chase in a Kitchen. UGH!! At least there's a bit of action as Ming-Na Wen and Boba take the Slave-1... then we're back at this show's favorite pastime: Politics! Holy shit! Implied dismemberment!! Now  it's Politics time...

I get that COVID-19 kinda ruined the filming, but my word, how much exposition can you cram on a miniseries!? I get that Temuera Morrison was 60 when this was filmed, but Boba Fett is covered from Head to Toe in Mandalorian Armor... USE A YOUNGER STUNT DOUBLE TO FILM ACTION SCENES AND THEN HAVE TEMUERA MORRISON DUB THE VOICE!!
But the answer will probably be that they didn't have as much budget as they did with Mando...

Shenmue: The Anime is coming on February 5th

 And there's some bad news...


They botched the English dub... it sounds NOTHING like the games... I will watch it because Shenmue, but I'm pissed that Corey Marshall isn't looking for sailors in this... 

I'm afraid of what will happen when normies invade the Shenmue Fandom and the True Blue Shenmue fans become ostracized.

Jan 17, 2022

35 years of Street Fighter: a rant

The year is 1987, Capcom released a little game called Street Fighter. The game didn't make a HUGE impact in videogame history AT THE TIME. CAPCOM needed a sequel and another game was meant to be a sequel to Street Fighter. That game was Final Fight, formerly known as Street Fighter '89. Unfortunately, Final Fight, while successful, it didn't become the success Capcom wanted. 
The Behemoth that surpassed all expectations was the game that MADE Street Fighter the household name it is and the one TRUE King of Fighters. 

Street Fighter might have been born in 1987, its Baptism by Yoga Fire was in 1991.
I've talked about my attachment to Street Fighter stemming from 2 and other media... but I'm not here to talk about my love for Street Fighter 2.

Capcom has dropped hints of something coming in 2022, due to it being the 35th anniversary of Street Fighter... problem is that 5 years ago they DID a celebration and released ALL THE SPRITE BASED Street Fighter games. I'm a sucker for Street Fighter 2, but I can't see myself rebuying Street Fighter 2 again... (we should revisit this in 2023 when I comment how I bought Street Fighter 2 AGAIN... a Street Fighter collection and somehow they were able to add Street Fighter The Movie The Game)

But let's be Honest here: the only way they can Surpass the 30th Anniversary is:

Six

Thinm about it: the 35th anniversary of Street Fighter would be the perfect spot to Release the first teaser trailer for Street Fighter Six! I don't expect them to release the game this year, but the announcement would be a nice way to celebrate Street Fighter...
Street Fighter Merchandise would be another way... preferably of the action figure variety.

Holy crap! I just had a crazy idea:
Ultra Street Fighter Alpha 3!
HD sprite art for Alpha 3 exactly like it was done for Street Fighter 2 when Ultra SF2 was released. The power of Saikyo in HD Glory!!