May 30, 2014

LeVar Burton's Reading Rainbow Kickstarter was a success!!

Recently, I found out about LeVar Burton's Kickstarter to bring back this:

Yes, LeVar Burton is trying to bring back Reading Rainbow.
His goal was to reach $1,000,000 in about a month (closer to 34 days). He reached it in about 11 hours. As of RIGHT now (date of publishing this rant) he has a little over 2.8 Million dollars and he still has 32 days left. THAT, ladies and gentlemen, is an AMAZING FEAT!

While they may have reached their goal, if you want to contribute to this worthy cause, then you can reach the campaign through this link: Bring Reading Rainbow Back for Every Child, Everywhere.
Helping kids to learn the importance of reading. Wow... This is a bit of fantastic news!!

May 28, 2014

It Came from the Toy Chest: Cringer's Great Grandpa Granger...

I kid you not... Battle Lion, King Grayskull's very own Battle Cat is called Granger. Sadly, he is not related to Hermione. He is also a Liger...
and he is huge... in the cartoon he is MASSIVE. King Grayskull was like a half-Giant and The Cartoon Battle Lion makes King Grayskull look tiny next to him... So Classicizer machine shrunk down Granger and made him what he is now.

So he's like Cringer's ancestor and when Adam summons the Power, he can make Cringer channel the power of his ancestor too!

So, here's the review for Battle Lion:
OK I lied... I just found out that the MOTU Fan-Film Kickstarter reached their goal!! Awesome! This calls for a celebration!! In any case here's the Review for Battle Lion.

It came from the Toy chest: Scorpia

Well, well, well, the final of the Filmation Femme Fatale Trio is Finally here. For those who don't know, I'm talking about Scorpia, Octavia and Shadow Weaver as the FFFT.

So, Scorpia is Finally Here!! What does this mean? Well it means a couple of things:
-All that is left is Dragstor, Multibot, Imp, Entrapta and Double Trouble to complete the Horde. 3 of those are coming in 2014.
-Another highly wanted Filmation Character has made it in Classics.

That's plenty enough to Celebrate... So now, let's Talk Scorpia.

Scorpia Loses 4 POA on her legs as most new POP Ladies lose their Boot Cut and the High Heeled Foot means that they also lose the Rocker Ankles (as seen on the flat soled feet on figures like Teela) She gains one POA on her Tail, which turns like Whiplash's or Rattlor's. So she gets a 3.5 here.

 Paint and Sculpt:
Scorpia looks like a Classicized Scorpia. She has her Filmation look but with added Details that make her pop. I LOVE the bumps and cracks on the caparace of her insectoid parts. Her new parts make her POP in a GREAT WAY!!
If there is one nitpick I have here is the color choices. Her Shoulders have a red that does not match the rest of the figure. I know that's the red seen on her animation cells, but it doesn't match the red of her Horde Skirt.

A Crossbow... a SINGLE FREAKING CROSSBOW is all she gets as an accessory.

Scorpia gets a 3.5 as her score. It's pretty bad, but I blame the lack of accessories here. Mattel made up some BS excuse on why Scorpia has a clip-on crossbow. Look at the pic where I have Scorpia holding Octavia's Crossbow. Their BS Reasoning may have stopped other accessories for Scorpia or anyone else... Seriously, they could have made a red cat Crossbow for Catra and have it come with Scorpia.

The Horde is growing... Mwahahahahahahaha!!

Neitlich's BIG Surprise for Subscribers is... Baby Skeletor

Something Horrible... Something disturbing... Something Straight out of Robot Chicken.

It's Baby Skeletor, loosely based on the Robot Chicken sketch... Not in Scale with MOTU Classics.

Here's what the page says about this item:
The Evil Lord of Destruction™ goes back in time… and turns into an itty bitty blue baby! This tale of a tyrannical tot, an unexpected detour, and buffalo wings comes from the twisted minds at one of our favorite stop-motion TV shows, and was the inspiration for this little guy. A must-have for true MOTUC fans, Baby Skeletor™ measures 12” tall (a total of 15” when sitting on his evil royal potty, including the potty) with articulation at the legs, shoulders and neck, and a face only a mother could… nope, sorry… even she thinks he’s hideous. The childish commander and his commode arrive in a unique closed-box throne package, and comes with a removable “Born to Rule” baby t-shirt and his Havoc Staff rattle. Baby Skeletor® may seem harmless, but remember… 80% of his body weight is in his horrible head!
Emphasis thrown-in by yours truly. "A Must-Have for TRUE MOTUC Fans?" Really? I remember back in 2010 that people complained a lot about the last Robot Chicken inspired item.
THIS, well, makes Mo-Larr a lot easier to swallow. This THING is NOT made in MOTUC Scale, so it is WORTHLESS FOR THE MOTUC FANS.
Once again, Failmation Hordak was made inaccurately, yet we're getting this THING...

a Must-have for True MOTUC fans would have been the Slime Pit, Point Dread, Stridor, Sagitar...
This thing comes nowhere near as any of those items... Hell even a Spector Variant would have been better than THIS THING!

A few weeks before the "Yearly: The Line is in Danger and we need all the MOTUC fans to unite and buy the sub!" we get this... It almost feels as if Neitlich is sabotaging himself at every turn.
Now this scares me... What if the Holiday item is Baby Beastman?

May 26, 2014

A MOTU Fan-Film on Kickstarter!? Time is running out!

Where the Heck was I when this happened!? This has been going on for nearly a month and I missed out on the news!? Bad Nefty!
OK, so here's this Kickstarter for a Fan-Film based on MOTU. If they reach the funds needed before this Thursday, May 29; then Daniel Benedict (The Castle Grayskullman Creator) will film this movie.
Here's the Link for the Kickstarter! The Fall of Grayskull fan film project.
as of Today, they are $1613 short of reaching their goal of $9500. I don't often promote these Kickstarter campaigns, but this one is MOTU Related and since Mattel is hellbent on dragging their feet as much as possible for the official Hollywood He-Man movie... Well, we need something to make Mattel and Sony get their asses in gear.

Personally I have more hopes on Fan Projects than the Hollywood versions (see Street Fighter: Assassin's Fist) So, if you have some extra cash lying around and you love Masters of the Universe, consider giving some of that cash to them before this Thursday!

It's Memorial Day 2014... Holy Crap!!

Many may have some Relatives who may have fallen in one of the many wars that humanity has fought in the past century. While I don't have any who died in battle. I have a few who died as veterans. I may not agree with the Military, the reasons of some wars, but I acknowledge the courage of those who enlisted, are willing to Fight and in some cases die, for whatever the reason. (Patriotism, Economic safety, etc.)

So, let me move away from historical stuff that has some political undertones, before I start rambling on and on like a character from a Hideo Kojima Game.

I think I may keep the Hideo Kojima Game theme because of some reasons:

-Still haven't played MGSV: Ground Zeroes. (Will get to it soon... probably sooner than me playing RE6)
-Been replaying MGS4.  I blame Raiden may Cryonetta for that. So, I've got the story of the game a bit too fresh in my head right now.

I realized something. Big Boss dies (again) in 2014 and Maybe Solid Snake Too!! Two of videogames greatest American Soldiers lost in one year... What does this mean?
The Metal Gear Franchise may be in danger. Think about it. MGS4 is basically Solid Snake's Final Adventure. (Accelerated Aging, FOXDIE) Big Boss also dies (finally) in MGS4. MGS5 is basically Pre Outer Heaven story. (Seems that Ground Zeroes happens in 1975, the Phantom Pain is 9 years later, so that's 1984 and the First Metal Gear game happens in 1995.) Basically we're running out of "Space" in the Metal Gear timeline for Adventures of Big Boss and/or Solid Snake.

Then we have the deaths of the Japanese VAs for Ocelot and Campbell. Allegedly, Hideo Kojima tweeted that due to the death of Campbell's VA, the character will not appear on future games...
Thus shutting down the chance of a Metal Gear 2: Solid Snake remake... The death of Ocelot's VA was before MGS4 and the whole Liquid Ocelot thing was conceived. (Japan getting the better end of the deal, in a way. Having Liquid Ocelot with Liquid's voice... No offense to Patrick Zimmerman, but I freaking love Cam Clarke's voice... Kinda wish he had been voicing Liquid one more time)

So, running out of space for more games with Big Boss and Solid Snake. Does this mean that Hideo could visit the Other Snakes? Obviously, I'm very much looking forward for a Liquid game. Though I wouldn't say no to a Solidus game. I'm not so sure on how I'd feel about More Post MGS4 Raiden games. Not because of Raiden, but more on me disliking Metal Gear rising's gameplay being nothing like any Metal Gear game.

It's a shame that one of my favorite gaming series is coming to an end... At least the end is not as pathetic as how Final Fantasy is going...

Metal Gear Series: I salute you!

It may seem a bit tacky and tasteless to rant about Metal Gear on Memorial Day, but Nothing will be as Tasteless as this:

Does Hasbro's Marvel SDCC Exclusives make Mattel's Hordak seem pathetic?

So Hasbro went and did THIS for their SDCC Exclusive for their 3.5" Marvel figures
A Four Pack of Death, Thanos, Starfox and Nebula...
We've already have a MU Thanos... So Death, Starfox and Nebula are new... Interesting...
Well that's not the most interesting part. The coolest part of this $75 set is the INFINITY GAUNTLET!!!
I think it's a bit overpriced since that's 4 MU figures, roughly $40-$45 in value and a Foam Infinity Gem is totally NOT $30.

But their Marvel Legends set is pretty cool as well.  This $100 set has:
Black Bolt, Medusa, Star-Lord, Gladiator, and a Blastaar BAF.
Sure, Hasbro had made a Black Bolt before (With ugly cloth wings on the Holocaust Wave that I NEVER SAW!!) but now this Black Bolt has Plastic wings!! Then there's 3 First timers with Medusa, Star-Lord (who goes well with the Rocket Raccoon BAF) and Freaking Gladiator!!
The only gripe I have about this set is: The set is based around a comic arc whose central character is NOT on the set...

Sure there was the Awesome Marvel Select Thanos from nearly 10 years ago (who is in scale with Marvel Legends) but we kinda need a Marvel Legends Thanos... I'd campaign for a Marvel Legends Shuma Gorath (to round up the Marvel Superheroes Cast) but we'd need Thanos first.

Oh, how many quarters I spent on thee~

So, my question remains: Do these Exclusives make Mattel's Hordak seem pathetic?

"Filmation Hordak": A New Variant of Hordak with very little new Tooling. (Left Cannon Forearm is a new piece. The Boots seem new without the peg holes showing. Imp is 100% New Tooling.)
It's not accurate to the Filmation Source Material. Head and Armor are Wrong.

Marvel Universe Set: 3 New Figures, 1 Repaint. One of the figures is virtually a statue.
Brand New Oversized prop.

5 Figures, one is a 2.0 version of a previous release, the rest are new. One of the newer figures is a BAF sized character.

At a glance, the Hasbro Marvel stuff seems a bit better than Mattel's MOTU offering.

But the Marvel Universe item has a Ridiculously high price tag. Them Hulk Foam Hands are usually in the $20-$25 range... Here we get a SINGLE Foam Hand shaped like  The Infinity Gem and 4 Marvel Universe Figures. As I mentioned way up above; it's way overpriced.

The Marvel Legends set is closer to actual retail value. The Marvel Legends now carry a $20 Price Tag. The set is $100. We could split it as 4 slightly overpriced figures and a BAF or as a 5 Figure set, where one of these is BAF sized.

Mattel's Hordak on the other hand is a slightly overpriced "Lazy Variant" of a figure we already have 3 variants of. Or we could see it as a $30 Imp with a free Hordak.

While Hordak is Cheaper and will be slightly easier to obtain... (Mattycollector is a lot better than Hasbro's site to get SDCC items.) I still feel that Hordak is simply pathetic for a San Diego Comic Con exclusive.

Hasbro is maximizing their slots for their Marvel Lines and using their Special SDCC Budget to deliver something with OOMPH!! Mattel? Well, not so much. They half-assed the most wanted Hordak variant and wasted the SDCC Slot. So much for Mattel Maximizing their slots!!

ML Gladiator... 2004 Me would be so pissed off if he knew.

May 24, 2014

Oh goody! A Gothic MLP Set seems to be coming to TRU!!

By the looks of it I'm 98.35% sure that I'm skipping this sucker.
Hoo boy! Where to start!
It looks like the Mane 6 Minus Applejack (Who I guess noticed how ridiculous everyone else looked and bowed out of this set.) and Princess Sunbutt spent some time in prison... Check out those Prison tats on them.
The worst part is the Tampo Clothing and the "Goth" Cutie Marks...
Seriously, Celestia has a Pink Eclipse Cutie Mark, while Fluttershy has MOTHS!!
Why is Sunbutt there? Wouldn't Luna fit better with the "Goth Crowd"

I suppose that now Twilight shall learn a Different kind of Magic...

My Little Pony: MCR is Magic.

Dammit Hasbro! Why is it so freaking hard to make sets with characters that people would actually WANT!!

Is it too freaking Hard to have Big McIntosh, Doctor Hooves, Rose(luck), a Great and Powerful Trixie with cape, hat and Alicorn necklace, Flash Sentry (can't believe I am adding him here), and an Applejack with a Cartoon Accurate Hat.

Hell! I would have Taken Princess Twilight vs Tirek and some extras as a TRU set... Seriously, Promoting the hell out of Rainbow Power, yet nothing about the Villain who FELL TO Rainbow Power... Then again, I'm still waiting for this guy.

This set is Soo disappointing and I'm glad that I can totally skip this!

May 23, 2014

So, Does the Assassin's Fist live up to its Hype?

Street Fighter: Assassin's Fist was made available at last!! The Street Fighter Fan Movie that is meant to show us that a GOOD Street Fighter Movie IS POSSIBLE...
Then again, When we have the bar set so low, so pretty much ANYTHING CAN BE BETTER THAN THE LAST HOLLYWOOD STREET FIGHTER MOVIE!

So let's forget this horrible Abomination and have a round of Street Fighter: Assassin's Fist!

I'm feeling generous, so here it is!

I shall not spoil it too much, but It Feels MORE Like Street Fighter than the last two Hollywood attempts. (Like I said above, that's pretty easy to do, since the Hollywood Street Fighters suck ass)
I LOVE that they are following the Ryu/Ken Storyline instead of going through Guile or Chun Li...
It's pretty obvious that the folks involved in this project have KNOWLEDGE of Street Fighter and they LOVE and RESPECT the source Material.

Now, it's NOT Perfect, but for a fan movie, it's pretty great! So, yes, it lives up to the hype.

May 22, 2014

Squeeeze Worries me...

I dread the Squeeeze figure, as I mentioned before. The fear stems mostly from MATTEL's reaction to the Snout Spout issue. No Bendy, now sculpted hard plastic for everything that was bendy. Losing on the ability to wrap other characters with his arms so he can "Squeeeze" them will suck...

Sadly, the reasons to dread him simply do not end there... As with Tung Lashor, there are more than one interpretation to the character... Vintage Toy or 200X Staction.

To me the simplest answer would be Articulate the Staction. We cannot do that "Classics style" and
other BS. Personally speaking, I'd hate a Larger Sized Vintage Squeeeze.
Let's start with his head. The Vintage Figure looks like a Crocodile, not a Snake.
Then we have the Torso... If we go Full Vintage then we'd need to use the upper Reptilian Torso with the lower Human torso. that would look weird... Made even weirder with the Terror Bra Armor.
The Arms would be new and mildly complicated. They'd need the Trap Jaw system of removable arms and maybe have an Armless Squeeeze mint on card, due to space issues. (Mattel could always make a second set of non-stretched arms, but I can hear them crying Logistics.)
From the crotch down he seems to be mostly new. (Maybe the lower knee where the boots are plugged can be reused.)

a 200X Squeeeze might have a few less new parts.
The head is new and slightly more anaconda-like.
The Draego-Neck piece and the armor may hide the Human upper Torso and the Hordak Flat Abs can complete the look.
Hssss Shoulders and Biceps can complete the upper arms. A New Forearm that can be swapped (stretched and unstretched) could work for him.
Crotch and legs would be new.

I'm VERY likely to be disappointed since the influences are most likely to be VINTAGE... (As seen with the rest of the Snakemen)

Personally I'd love for them to take Staction influences from the Waist up and have him vintage styled from the waist down. I wouldn't say no to two heads and two sets of hands: Vintage and 200X. He Could be the $35 "Holiday" item, due to the size of his arms and stuff.

May 21, 2014

Dammit Disney!! Why do you make so many catchy songs in your movies!?

It's been what? Six Months since THAT Movie came out and I can't go anywhere without hearing THAT Song... I mean No one wants to Build a Snowman or those other songs that no one remembers, because all Everybody remembers is that annoyingly catchy song that is pretty much everywhere...
I mean ir's weird enough when I'm doing stuff and suddenly I begin to sing: (badly)

Conceal, don't feel,

don't let them know
Well now they know

Then I quickly stop because I realized what I'm doing... It's nothing against Disney songs, but I'm trying to not remember THAT Song... Which is why I WILL NOT Review Frozen... Because All I remember is That Song, some implied Zoophilia, *PLOT TWIST Removed!* and that's pretty much it!
So, in the Spirit of Disney Songs (sticking to Animated Features, so we won't see anything regarding the ball-wrecking daughter of the Mullet-Loving dude with a frail heart.) Here's my Top 10 Songs from a Disney Animated Feature:

10-Under the Sea:
The Sole Representation of The Little Mermaid. I kinda Blame Kingdom Hearts II in part for this. Having to do that sing-a-long pseudo-rythm game sequence drilled that song into my head. Though in all fairness, I DID like the song a bit more than Part of Your World (which is the OTHER Little Mermaid Song I remember)

09-Bibbidi Bobbidi Boo: (spelling?):
Well, This is one of the Few songs from CLASSIC Disney Movies that I randomly hum... (Mostly because I'm too lazy to learn the Lyrics) and I began re-watching the Original Cinderella thanks to the 50+ years later sequels... (with Jennifer Hale doing Cinderella... Sadly, she does not say Anti-Freezing Peptide in any of those movies... Prince Charming was none other than Christopher Daniel Barnes. I'll let this sink in. The Cinderella Sequels have Both Black Cat and Spider-Man as Cinderella and Prince Charming... But wait... Spider-Man was also Prince Eric from The Little Mermaid) In any case here's Bibbidi, Bobbidi Boo... (For some reason I want to see some Monkey Men turn blonde and fight a pink fat dude)

08-Cruella DeVil:
I'm not too fond of 101 Dalmatians, but the whole Cruella song was awesome. Roger is pretty much mocking Cruella through song and it's pure genius. We hear the lyrics before Cruella shows up at the house; then Roger keeps playing the song louder as Cruella is there... Proto-Trolling?

07-Friend Like Me:
Now I'll reach to the 90s Era of Disney with this song from Aladdin. I could have chose Arabian Knights, which I honestly like more, but due to some controversial lyrics, I cannot officially endorse that song. Also, I don't like the sanitized version. To be Honest, it's the visuals what I like the most with this song.

06-One Jump Ahead:
This is the Other Song From Aladdin (aside Arabian Nights) that I LOVE. I can almost say that THIS is my Favorite Song from Aladdin... A Whole New World  be damned!

05-Be Prepared:
This list needs some more Villain Flavoring... While The Lion King has a LOT of Great Songs, I'm picking Be Prepared because Scar Singing and the Militaristic Imagery on the song sends some chills down my spine. This is my #2 Favorite The Lion King Song... Let's face it, After The Lion King the rest of the songs weren't as great... Until Frozen and THAT song came along.

04-Colors of the Wind:
Well, James Cameron's Avatar minus the Giant CGI Cats needs some representation and this is the only thing I remember from this movie... Well, to be more precise: The only thing I remember from the whole Pocahontas movie is: Wait, Isn't Pocahontas supposed to be like 10? and
 Have you ever heard the wolf cry to the blue corn moon?
Literally that's the only line from Colors of the Wind aside the Title that's the only part of the song that I remember.

03- Be our Guest:
Beauty and The Beast... I was torn which song should I pic from this movie... It was this or the Gaston song. But, Gaston's theme is lacking something a je ne sais quoi that Be our Guest has.

02-You've got a friend in me:
The only song from the Pixar branch of Disney Animated features. This song happens to be on my MP3 Player and often pops up at the most inappropriate times. Now, going back to the song and in a way, the movie. This song is what I associate with the Toy Story series.

01-Hakuna Matata:
What a wonderful phrase! It means no worries for the rest of your days. Also, it's a catchy song and MY Favorite Song from The Lion King and all of Disney's Animated Features. Reminds me of a more innocent time and breaking into this song and having others join in as well was beautiful...

Heh, aside a few choices here and there, most of my picks are pretty much the same songs that were hammered down everyone's eardrums... Dammit Disney!!

Andrew Garfield will be back for 2 more Spider-Man Movies...

Meh... He's not a bad Spidey... He's not the BEST Parker, but he has the potential... Now if they got rid of Marc Webb, who seems to be the common denominator on the suckitude of the last 2 Spider-Douche Movies. The writers were not the same people... Though I do not want the Spider-Douche 2 Writers back... The Kurtzman-Orci team of fail... They write crappy movies that somehow make money...

Exhibit A...

For Garfield to be the Best Peter Parker, they first need to stop the Labeouf Stutter

Tone down the douchebag factor as Peter. (Spidey can be a bit of a douche). Ramp up the awkwardness a bit more... (Tobey-Man had this perfectly...) Keep the Wisecracks for Spidey.

That's all they need to do to improve his Peter... Everything else... Dammit Jim, I'm a ranter, not a Miracle Worker!!

In a way, it scares me that Garfield is tied down to TWO MORE MOVIES... Not because of him, but because they will make TWO MORE SEQUELS after the disappointment that was "Amazing" Spider-Man 2... While Better than the First "Amazing" it was not better than this:

May 20, 2014

Oh Noes! Poor Vinnie Mac!!

Let me shed a tear, because Poor Vince McMahon is no longer a BILLIONAIRE... He is simply now a Multi-Millionaire!! Yes, Poor Vinnie Mac Lost $350 Million in 24 hours. Analysts put the blame on the Online Streaming Service (WWE Network) and the TV Deal with NBCUniversal to keep Raw and Smackdown on TV...

This has NOTHING TO DO AT ALL with how Crappy the WWE has become...
godCena running around being a pathetic store brand knock-off of Hulk Hogan (in the 80s)
Steph and HHH trying to be Cartman 
good fighters being kept in the mid-card status because HHH is bringing in his old buddies.
the lack of decent stories for feuds. When you start making feuds because of comments from reality shows that were recorded months ago, but aired recently... seems pathetic.
I swear I won't mention the craptacular way the Streak was ended...

But it's OK, The Quality of the WWE shows had NOTHING to do with the "smaller than expected" amount of sub subscribers to the WWE Network service.

I feel REALLY BAD for Poor Vinnie Mac... How can he afford to live with a net worth of $750 Million? I see a lot of Ramen in Poor Vinnie Mac's future.
In the meantime I'll leave this as a reminder on why Vince is now in the Poorhouse.

Now THIS IS What Mattel should have been doing with MOTUC

I recently read the MOTU Fan Fiction: The Keldor Chronicles by Matthew C. Kayser. You can get it here. It takes Multiple elements from past continuities and mixes them in a coherent story. Not to mention that for a novel, it's a bit short (Approximately 170 pages), but it works as a more mature take on the MOTU uh, Universe... without the overuse of gratuitous violence, adult language and nudity that other Mature takes on MOTU have done.

I know that novels take a lot more time to write than comics, but at the same time, they don't have the restrictions as mini comics. This piece of Fan fiction feels more in tune to MOTU than Mattel's own current canon for MOTU. Reintroducing MOTU as a series of books would help return He-Man to a better status than perennial gay joke or "I remember him from the 80s." status that he currently has.

It may conflict with Mattel's plan of selling toys, but it helps the brand in the long run. I mean, HALO and Splinter Cell, both popular videogame series (that I do not like) have novels in addition to the games. The main goal of those brands is to sell games, but they have used books as a way to expand the universe... and expand their audience. Even Star Wars did it (though most of the Expanded Universe is now NOT CANON)

While this rant may seem like a half-assed plug to the fanfic mentioned above, it's not simply that. The fic, sparked the inspiration for the rant and the idea that using novels to tell the story would have been awesome... Now imagine, a world where Mattel had invested for a writer to write MOTU Stories and Subscribers would get first access to these (through the My subscriptions page of the matty site)
Perhaps Mattel could have used these to make people more excited for some of the "less loved" characters and parts of the universe. I'd rather read about a character's exploits through an actual adventure with said character than having the bio trying to force his Absolute Heterosexuality down my throat.

I'd recommend that you check out The Keldor Chronicles... It's a way better read than Justin Marks' pathetic attempt at a MOTU Movie script.

May 19, 2014

Wait what!? Now US TV is copying Telenovelas?

First it was Ugly Betty... The "Americanized" version of the Colombian Telenovela Yo soy Betty La Fea. Now they are Adapting Juana La Virgen!? WHAT THE HELL!?

CW What are you doing!?
Have we reached so low that Telenovelas have to be ripped off in order to make new series?
I mean Ugly Betty went into a direction COMPLETELY DIFFERENT than the Original Yo Soy Betty La Fea.

Nothing against other countries adapting shows and localizing them...

I guess some people may guess which show is this...
Hell, look at what Italy did to Titanic...

It's just weird that of all things to adapt for North American TV, we're getting Telenovelas.
I mean, it's hard enough to avoid them in most Latin American Households. I don't need them creeping in on my English Programming TV as well!

 Seriously, what's next? I know a few Telenovelas that could be ridiculous enough to be "Americanized"

Venezuela's Mi Gorda Bella: Something, something, evil scheming Prostitute becomes the matriarch of a rich family and causes the Protagonist to grow fat. There's even a masked vigilante, a cross-dressing cop... I'm not kidding with this.

Mexico's Mujer De Madera: Something Something Rancher Family, long lost sister, Evil aunt with henchmen, one weird drug trafficker who is protected by a Devil Worshipper. Oh yeah! The main character gets recast halfway through and they burn the previous actress so they can give her a facial reconstructive surgery or something.

OK, so those two lend themselves to be "Americanized" series... I mean, as long as they don't consider doing any of Thalía's stuff I'm cool... Poor girl meets rich dude... convoluted telenovela BS to keep them away and in the end they end up together...

and yes, he talks...

May 18, 2014

The Flash Trailer was out and I missed out!

So, I missed out on Arrow's Season 2 Finale... Then THIS Happened while I was in a world without cable or internet...

Holy Crap! If I was stoked to see The Flash Before, Now I am 3 time MORE Excited.
I had a few doubts on Grant Gustin as the Flash... the Trailer erased those pretty fast. While I had my suspicions that they were going to use Geoff Johns stuff, the trailer confirms it. Angsty Barry is the Barry we're getting. So far he seems more lighthearted than Oliver "Downer" Queen. Oh yeah, Barry Allen is now Dawson's brother...

Speaking of Ollie Queen... I didn't need the Trailer to get this excited about Flash... This Teaser with a Whovian Reference for a hashtag would have had the same effect on me.

Good to know that DC is at least trying to do something with other characters aside the Bat-Shaped Crutch and the Blue Boy Scout... shame that they can't seem to get anything Decent with Wonder Woman off the ground.

Five Things that I want to see in MLP: friendship is Magic season 5

Since we have to wait until 2015 to see more MLP, here's a small list of things that I want to see in 2015... Why 5? Because Season 5!

Sea Ponies: Remember them from G1? If we had to endure the Abominations from G3, then the Seaponies are not as far-fetched. Yeah, I'm NOT a fan of the Breezies... but I love the Sea Ponies! I know they have appeared on a book, but that's a book and not the cartoon.

An Episode With The Doctor:  Well, this was to be expected. We've had a few cameos of The Doctor and a Pony whose name happens to be Rose(luck). I want a bit more. I want The Doctor to have a speaking Role... While yes, it would be insanely awesome to get A DOCTOR to voice him. At this stage I'll take a guy with a Hammy Over the top fake British Accent at this stage of the game.
Stick him with Twilight so we can have the classic Doctor Who conversation:

DH: I'm The Doctor!
TS: Doctor what?
DH: Just The Doctor
TS: Doctor of what?
DH: THE Doctor
TS: (Groans)

Or a scene where Discord shows up carrying a Plunger and an Egg Beater and Doctor Hooves freaks out. (we could also use Statue Discord coming to life when he isn't looking.
Sadly, this is very unlikely to happen unless Hasbro, DHX and the teams involved with FIM get an OK from the TARDIS BLUE guys across the pond...

The Cutie Mark Crusaders getting their Cutie Marks: We've gone through 4 seasons and their flanks are really bare. It would be sad to see the show end BEFORE the CMC get their Cutie Marks.
Sure some might say that them getting their Cutie Marks would End their usefulness as Characters...
To them I say: *shudder* Look at Twilight Sparkle. She is still Our Nerdy and Socially Awkward Twily... but She now has Princess Wings... Isn't it Amaaaaaaaaziiiiiiiiing!? Sure they wouldn't be the Cutie Mark Crusaders anymore, but their team could get a new name... The Filly 3?

Lord Smooze: Yes, the Lord Title comes from the MLP FIM Parody MLP friendship is Witchcraft... That even the FIM Team has acknowledged in Equestria Girls... Or a freaky coincidence... Having Smooze in the show could help the FiW team to finally have Smooze!

The Return of past nuisances/villains: Talking about folks like Iron Will, diamond Dogs, Gilda, or Sombra... Especially Sombra since his single appearance was so pathetic that he needs to redeem himself. Also, I want more excuses for Twilight to go Super Saiyajin!!

Now on the OTHER Hand, here's 4 things that I DO NOT WANT to see in Season 5

Multiple Rarity-centric episodes: I don't Like Rarity... I think I have established that already. Almost all of Rarity's "Friendship lessons" can be summarized to: STOP BEING A SELFISH BITCH! PONY!!
I'm not saying NO RARITY EPISODES... Just keep them to a minimum... Because even Sweetie Belle-centric Episodes get turned into Rarity Episodes. Although, I wouldn't mind more Rarity AND Applejack Episodes...

Humans: Sorry Megan and Siblings... You should remain in G1 forever... I already got my fill of MLP Humans in Equestria Girls.

CMC-centric Episodes (aside the one they get their cutie marks): Before I get attacked by mobs of CMC fans. I mean CMC-Centric Episodes as in all three Members of the CMC are doing stupid stuff that will NOT GET THEM Their Cutie Marks. This is NOT the same as saying no to episodes with Apple Bloom, Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle. It's just when they are in CMC-Mode, the three of them become 1 annoying character with 3 voices.

Obvious Marketing Episodes: While Royal Wedding, and Rainbow Power Episodes were good, the Crystal Empire sucked ass (except the Fastball Special) I can say the same thing about them Breezies (Doctor cameo aside) While Sea Ponies would count as an Obvious Marketing episode, it's the Sea Ponies, a staple from Generation 1!

Holy Batsuit, Affleck! Also, Gal Gadot as Not Wonder Woman

Being tossed back to the early 90s this week hurts the most when I missed out on the Reveal of Sad Batman... and the Batmobile.
This is a glimmer of hope. Batffleck looks good, a bit sad... but he looks the part. I think He COULD Pull it off. I just wish that the news had ended there, because that Batffleck seems like the highlight of the movie... And Kevin Smith called it all the way in the 1990s...

Sadly, and I already had very low expectations of this; Gal Gadot does NOT LOOK LIKE Wonder Woman... A pic of her shows Ms. Gadot standing next to a tree looking like a Brunette Paris Hilton instead of Wonder Woman. I guess she has an Invisible Chihuahua in the baggage she is carrying.

Now, in all fairness, she seems to have gained a bit of weight. Sadly, I already stated that no matter how much she bulked up her small frame would not make her look like Wonder Woman... I guess she is the reason why Batffleck is sad... (rimshot) What's with the shoulder pads?
They remind me of something... I'm thinking PS1... Squaresoft... 3 discs...

At Least She didn't have Popeye forearms to complete the FFVII Character look.

They should just reveal her Wonder Woman look to shut up the haters or prove them right... It kinda worked with Batffleck!

May 17, 2014

11 things that would have been better than Failmation Hordak for SDCC

Failmation Hordak has been the weakest San Diego Comic Con exclusive for the MOTUC Line.
Since I'm on day 7 of my Back to the Early 90s with no internet, no phone and no cable... Hence the lack of rants during this past week... No pics on this rant since I'm phone-ranting... I forgot that my phone could actually allow me to post rants, with no pics.

Why 11? Because I'm ripping off a page from the Nostalgia Critic's Playbook!

11: Buzz Saw Hordak
Before people stab me with pitchforks and burn me down with torches, hear me out.
Buzz Saw Hordak SUCKS ASS!! If he's made as is. Had Mattel Combined Failmation Hordak AND Buzz Saw Hordak into ONE Figure we'd:
-take the least wanted Hordak variant AND the MOST WANTED Hordak Variant and roll them into one. Basically a white faced, blue skinned Hordak with the Buzz saw Armor. For those who want a more Vintage toy BS Hordak, swap armors with a normal Hordak. toss in the Filmation head as a second head to  make him a bit more appealing for Filmation fans while keeping the original Hordak head for those who prefer the vintage toy inspired look...
Also, he would have fit better with the "Maximizing slots" and all that. As of now we have 5 Vintage MOTU variants remaining for 2015!

10: Energy Zoids
These two were often rumored as the SDCC Exclusive, which made sense. SDCC items have a budget not attached to the normal budget. They fit well with the "Maximizing Slots" plan. That would have been 2 figures out of the way.

9: MultiBot
I campaigned for him as a futile idea of a better SDCC Exclusive, back when speculation pointed at the zoids. Forming MegaBeast before 2015 seems like an obvious idea. Alas, he's being held back for 2015.

8: Flying Fists He-Man vs Terror Claws Skeletor 
This set could have been Called the Second Ultimate Battleground set:
-Knocks 2 of the remaining Vintage 5 Variants out of the way.
-Brings the BIG 2 TOGETHER for San Diego. What would attract more folks Obscure guy #35 from a mini comic or Freaking He-Man and Skeletor?
Aside the Mo-Larr year and the Orko figure we've never had Both He-Man and Skeletor as an exclusive for Comic Con.

7: Catra vs She-Ra Toy inspired pack
Princess of Power is "30" this year. So, it would make sense to have Something She-Ra related.
(Yes, I'll keep wanting these for obvious reasons)

6: Deluxe Alcala styled He-Man (Oo-Larr) 
I've talked about Deluxe Figures before. Especially a Deluxe He-Man. Now what is so deluxe about this one?
He's 2 Figures in one. The Barbarian (named Oo-Larr in the Neitlichverse) with the bare forearms and bare feet. Also, He-Man with the New Forearms for the NA Hands and the He-Man boots (with a new Dagger on the right one. Removable He-man Belt and Bada Bing Bada Boom! 2 for one. If Mattel wanted to Spice it up, they could have added a Green Goddess 2.0 without "I ate at Taco Bell" action!

5: Laser Power He-Man vs Laser Light Skeletor
While these guys scream 2015, we had them in the Gorpo mini comic. Also, Maximizing slots and all that. Not to mention, having the Mani 2 at SDCC.It would have had some synergy with the mini comic and all that.

4: "Filmation Skeletor" with Bone Throne
Mattel pretty much has all the pieces for this. (Skeletor buck with Keldor Boots) All we'd need is the throne and a "Filmation head". People WANT the Bone Throne and would put up with yet another Skeletor. Toss with him a Diamond Ray of Disappearance as an accessory besides the repainted Havoc staff and presto! Evil Diorama that nearly everyone wants. It can also help the folks who want Snake Mountain to have a little something.

The only real reason to get Failmation Hordak is Imp... Now in this case we took Hordak out and replaced him with all the imp forms.

2: Despara
Simple: She promotes the DC Comic AND it's She-Ra's "30th", not to mention that it's a kickass Horde Adora.

1: Slime Pit
A Playset!? Am I nuts!? Not really. a MOTUC Slime Pit wouldn't be THAT Big. Also, the Slime Pit is basically 2 Sheets of Plastic formed into the floor and back wall. (adding the little dino arms and head.) Now for the Special Scalperriffic difference between the San Diego version vs the Mattycollector version: A Bucket of Slime. The Matty version would have no slime (but some clear green pieces to simulate it) The SDCC version would get a polybagged bucket of slime in addition to the pit.

Dragstor: The Rant.

We got Snout Spout, we got Extendar, the remaining Third Etherian Experimented on by Hordak is none Other than Dragstor. This one is the only one of the
"Experimental 3" that sided with the Evil Horde. His ability is lying on his belly and zooming around like a drag racer... Hence the name Dragstor...
Sadly he has nothing to do with being a drag queen... MOTUC Double Trouble has that area covered... So Dragstor lies on his belly and zooms past enemies. The vintage figure had a rip-cord to make him race. Now, this is a character that I'm curious to see in Classics. I'll be frank, he's not a "MOST WANTED" for me.
The curiosity stems on how the Action Feature will be implemented on him... The Lazy Answer will be an Armor with a solid unmovable wheel. (I expect this one. TBH) The CHALLENGE for Brandon and the Design Team would be to implement a functioning Wheel to the design WHILE PRESERVING MOST of the Torso Articulation. Making a Solid Piece from the neck to the crotch is the second easiest solution. Not the Best Solution in my opinion but more acceptable than Normal Buck + Armored wheel.
I'm not a Toy Designer, but here's how I see the Wheel remaining Functional:

I have not cracked open a Normal Torso, nor I intend to. The Ab Crunch POA works because the upper Torso and the ab are connected on a peg. This peg also allows for the hinged movement of the Torso. Then the Lower Torso Has a Peg that attaches to the crotch, which allows for the rotating of the waist.

For Dragstor, the Waist Rotation may have to be sacrificed.  A New Ab piece + Crotch in one piece should be used. The Tire part of the wheel should be able to spin freely. The Central Piece that holds the Tire in place should connect to the Upper and Lower torso. the Upper Peg's design with round ends and a square shaped center should allow for the Ab Crunch articulation to remain mostly intact while it stops the central piece holding the wheel from rotating.The Lower peg should be square shaped to stop the central piece from rotating as well.

As you may have noticed, I AM trying the best I can to Preserve the Ab Crunch articulation on him. This is mostly for display reasons. If having Dragstor posed in his racing pose, we NEED The Ab Crunch so he can "SEE" where he's going. No Ab Crunch and he'll be staring at the floor... just like we remember.
Then again, I'm not a toy designer so my idea may be super flawed...
He'd require a bunch of new Parts... Especially the thighs. I honestly DO NOT WANT Trap Jaw Thighs on him.
Head, Upper and Lower Torso, thighs, forearms, backpack, boots. He's almost a 100% new tooling character.

I wonder what will the FourHorsemen do to the Ripcord... Orko's turned into a wand. Personally I hope they turn it into some sort of grappling hook that Dragstor uses to make 90 or 180 degree turns. Worst Case Scenario involves axing the Ripcord.

I suspect he is a 2015 Character since it seems that only He and Multibot are the remaining Vintage Horde Members. Not to mention that 2014 has Entrapta, Scorpia, Modulok, "Filmation Inspired" Hordak with Imp AND Double Trouble as the Horde Figures of the year. OK DT is debatable due to her double agent status. OK 2015 may have a Buzz Saw Hordak lying around. Still, my point still stands, we're a Dragstor and a Multibot short of a complete Toy Horde. (Without counting variants)

May 12, 2014

Tung Lashor: What's Mattel going to do with him?

There is A snakeman that I dread to own... That is Sssqueeeze. The other one left is the one I had as a child, Tung Lashor.
He poses a little problem... WHICH of HIS 3 Looks should he get?
Vintage Like most MOTUC? (The most likely option)

Filmation? (Oh please, Toy Lords, or in this case Guru, don't you DARE pick this option!)

200X? I know, I know... Take it away, Vinnie Mac!

There's something that BUGS Me out of Tung Lashor...
Look at the pic: Vintage Tungy looks like a Poison Dart Frog.

Filmation, well Charmander looks like Tungy!

200X Looks a bit more like a Gila Monster...

You know what he DOES NOT LOOK LIKE?

Go on, click on the link and listen to Voice Actor Paul Eiding telling you the answer... I'll wait...

THAT is my main issue with Tung Lashor. You probably figured it out WITHOUT listening to Mr. Eiding. He's my favorite character from the Snakemen faction. The prehensile tongue is a cool power... A bit disturbing, but cool! Now unto the Figure itself:
I expect it to be 95% Vintage and the remaining 5% is cool stuff from 200X.

Tungy only needs an Upper Torso, Head(s), Hands, and Feet. And in a Worst Case Scenario, they could reuse the Whiplash Feet on him.

The only real 200X Elements I'd like to see on him are:
-Optional Torso Armor. Like Rattlor before him, the lack of Armor would make him feel Incomplete. the Horsemen could "cheat" by making a "Slip-On" piece to create the armored look with it, and without it Tungy looks vintage.
-The extended Tongue. While ridiculous, the fanged tongue is more threatening than the vintage Strip...
I seem to recall that Marvel Select msde the tongue for their Venom Removable. This could work for Tung Lashor as well. It saves Mattel/The Horsemen the chore of making a second head. That way they can give us 3 Tongues: normal, Vintage extended, 200X Extended.

He doesn't REALLY Require THAT much new Tooling, so I expect him to be a 2015 figure...

May 10, 2014

Twilight's Kingdom... There will be Spoilers!

The Fourth Season Finale of My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic is here!

Do Not Read if you haven't seen it... There will be Spoilers... It's in the title there!!

So, I'm not fond of the Twilycorn Princess, because it's a stinking Marketing Ploy. This Season Finale is meant to give Twilight a Purpose.

-Twilight is unsure of herself as a Princess...
-Damn that Flash Sentry
-Spike makes Twilight's lack of importance more obvious... The usual.
-Cadance tries to make Twi feel better, but Twi is a mega downer...
-SONG!! Celestia Cadance and Luna sing!?
-Some Pony got his Cutie Mark stolen by G1 Villain, Tirek! He grows by
eating Cutie Marks!! If you don't know who Tirek is, here's a little refresher.

Yes, He dies by Rainbows in the 80s.
-Celestia Nightmare!! Dun dun dun!!
-Legend time!! Scorpan and Tirek tale... Tirek went to Hell!
-Downer Twi strikes back...
-Discord Poppins... points the M6 in the right direction. *cough*Journal*cough*
-Tirek vs Discord? More like Tirek tempting Discord to the Dark Side!
-Flashbacks to the "Rainbow items" episodes. Dammit! Stop it with the Breezies! Nopony and nobrony likes them!!
-Pinkie plays with boneless and figures out the secret of the chest!  -Downer Twi strikes back! and Spike pukes a letter.
-Discord was seduced by the Dark Side. Nooo!! DERPY!!!!
-Celestia offers to sacrifice Alicorn magic...To be continued

Part II:
-The Alicorn Magic is being shoved into Twilight! Can't tell friends.
-Twilight is no longer Downer Twi. She is Ready!! SHE HAS THE POWER!!
-Discord sensed the shift... The Alicorns can now become CMC!!
-Twilight raises the sun and the moon chaotically!
-Shining Armor vs Tirek... It just got real!
-Tirek tried to eat the Alicorns and failed.
-Twily Rainboom! Twily can't adapt to new power level!
-Holy crap! Tirek is badass! Feel like he's going to betray Discord.
-Tirek figured out about Twilight... The Castleless Princess!
-Mane 5 and Spike were betrayed by Discord. Fluttershy cried...
-Tirek betrayed Discord and ate his magic... I guess Discord WILL give Twi the Key.
-Tirek vs Twilight? Bye bye Library!
-Twilight Shinkuu Hadouken'd Tirek, but it did nothing. Actual Fight!! I mean DBZ levels of fighting here... Holy crap!
-Magic for Twi's friends... Obvious Sacrifice situation. Keep Magic, Lose Friends vs Keep Friends, Lose Magic... Gee! wonder what the answer will be. Keep friends, lose Magic of course!
-Tirek became a Kaiju... and nothing came out of that.
-TASTE THE Power... of Rainbows and Hasbro Marketing!! Friendship IS MAGIC, BITCH!!
-A Tree House Castle for Twilight! Princess of Friendship!!
-SONG!! The End...

My thoughts about it...
Downer Twi was a bit TOO Overplayed. The First song was pretty cool and I was pleasantly surprised to have Celestia AND Luna Sing. Discord's Heel Turn was obvious. I was hoping for a Face Turn before being betrayed by Tirek, but it never fully materializes.
KNOWING that Tirek was the villain made the Rainbow Power Crap a bit more palatable...
The Twilight vs Tirek Fight was very rewarding... Taking in consideration this show's Target Audience.

I suppose that Season 5 will get a new intro... Now, with that said, I CAN'T WAIT for Season 5 since Season 4 ended in such a high note. So far, this has been the BEST Season Finale in the series.

May 8, 2014

Odds and ends: 5-8-14 With The Flash Ohai! Creepy Hannah Montana Actor!

That is an amazing bit of news! The Flash is Finally coming to the CW. Arrow is one Episode from the Season Finale... Now the Wait for not one but TWO shows on the CW has been intensified... I haven't been this excited with the CW, since it was called the WB and new seasons of Buffy were announced... Yeah, I wasn't a fan of Dullsville... I mean Supes' Creek, err... Smallville!

Sweet Niblets!

Moises Arias from Hannah Montana has turned a lot of people against him by posing shirtless with the Fresh Prince's daughter. Of course, Jada Pinkett-Smith did the mature thing and called the people who critiqued the photo "covert pedophiles". Then again, Jada defends Bieber's inexcusable behavior.
While the pic is rather tame, it CAN BE interpreted as creepy... Like that Old Pic of Miley Cyrus and her father, Billy Ray. The pic is rather tame with both of them fully dressed, but the pose is what is a bit off-putting.

The Pic of Willow Smith and Moises Arias IS a bit more off-putting than Miley's old pic due to the fact that they're both on a bed. Mr. Arias is sitting Shirtless, while Ms. Smith is kinda lying at his feet. the fact that she is 13 and he is 20 has raised some concerns... His "dat Ass face" doesn't help things. Had the background been a backyard, a beach, a lake, or any "public space" the creepy vibe would be a lot less. Not helping Willow's cause is her hanging out with the Jenner Girls (This is as close to the term Kar****ian will be on this blog...)
13 year old girl keeping up with an older crowd... This seems like a recipe for a disaster.

Speaking of Disasters... I've mentioned how James Franco has gotten the rights to adapt The Disaster Artist into a movie. Well, James Franco is going to do something incredible... He will play Tommy Wiseau in The Disaster Artist!! Holy crap! I need to get that Book... and I can't wait to see Mr. Franco doing some Wiseauisms

It's Morphin' time?

Lionsgate is interested in doing a Power Rangers movie... I found about this when one person was asking his followers to pester Lion Gates to have HIM in the movie as A Power Ranger. I'll give you a hint:

I don't mind the idea of a Reboot of Power Rangers... Part of me has been aching for one.
the part I find weird is that Jason David Frank (Mighty Morphin' Green, White Rangers, Zeo, Turbo Red Rangers, and Dino Thunder Black) wants to be Tommy in this reboot.
Last time I checked, Zordon says:
"Alpha, Rita's escaped! Recruit a team of teenagers with attitude!" 

Nowhere it indicates to locate a 40-year-old man to pretend to be a Teenager with Attitude!!

As much as I like JDF, I think it's time to... wait for it... Let it go! It's a freaking Reboot! Not a continuation of Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers.

I wouldn't say no to a JDF Cameo, but not to have him as a Ranger. Maybe he could be New Tommy's dad or something.
I'm a bit wary about this, but not as I am with the TAINT or how I was with Spider-Douche... Unless they Twilightize the hell out of MMPR...

May 7, 2014

Holy Crap! I just saw the non-Turtle TAINT toys!!

Whoa!! They are UG-LEE!!
I've ranted before about the Turtle designs being ugly, but now with official pics from the toys, well I'm appalled by them.

Let's start with April, who seems to have something hidden in her crotch area... I could give you a hint...  → → → → →
But that's not the only weird thing. Her Proportions seem off
and I'm trying to not make jokes about Megan's thumbs.
BTW Her face looks NOTHING LIKE Megan Fox.
She kinda looks like a ginger Drew Barrymore 20 years ago.

What the Hell did they do to the Foot Ninja... Or Soldier...
He looks like a Generic Soldier Toy who wears  a lame mask.

Splinter takes the cake of awfulness!!!
He's a Rat so, Big Front Teeth (buckteeth)... A top-knot Hairstyle and a Fu Manchu Mustache... Add a Kimono, Sandals and a Kimono and we have a SUPER Racist stereotype... In all fairness, most recent versions of Splinter had the long beard, but the 2014 version takes the most racist elements and kicks them up to a hundred... I'm surprised they didn't gave him squinty eyes.

I've no real complaints with Flasher Turtle, since that one is common in multiple continuities... That's the best looking toy from the bunch since it looks LIKE AN ACTUAL TMNT CHARACTER... But the long plastic coat most likely hinders a LOT of articulation.

I left Howaito Shredder for last because... WTF!? Spiked Metal Cape... Talk about impractical. He's got more spikes than normal. Shoulders, Biceps, Forearms... How can he move without getting his arms tangled with the spikes?  That Helmet looks more Shao Kahn than Shredder.
I KINDA LIKE the sort of Face on his abdomen... a nod to the Utrom Shredder, perhaps?

One thing is certain though, I'm saving a lot of money by not buying these.
Meanwhile the nick version keeps throwing bones to old farts like me!

Alternate Universes... Parallel Timelines... Multiple Continuities... Cohesiveness in MOTU?

Classics is a hodgepodge of past continuities, some of them with conflicting canons. Somehow the Mattel Bio Writing Team manages to Shove all of these in one continuity. We have seen hiccups in continuity... Especially when the Bio Team changes events and tells us to use the cartoons as reference. This falls flat especially during the New Adventures of He-Man chapter. Mattel wants us to follow the Toon, but the events of it do not match MOTUC Continuity.
On the Toon only He-Man and Skeletor went to the Tri-Solar Galaxy. On MOTUC He-Man, She-Ra, various heroes went to the Tri-Solar Galaxy following Skeletor.

Having a Time Traveler character is the best way to iron out some of the kinks due to the multiple universes, parallel timelines multiple continuities, etc. in MOTU. Spector is not being used to the best of his potential. I made a rant already about making an Alternate Timeline story with Spector and redoing some older figures from the Alternate Timeline.

The Spector angle is the best way to Streamline the timeline and "fix" the bigger errors in the Classics Canon. Any Contradiction of Past events with the newer, more cleaned up continuity can be chalked up to Spector fixing some errors in the timeline (done by some time criminals or something.)

For example: the Pre-Filmation Barbarian He-Man could be Adam from a  different timeline where Hordak Kidnapped BOTH Children, but lost Adam as he escaped  the Palace. Adam was raised in the vine jungle without knowledge of his true heritage and name. Or Despara being the Adora from a timeline where He-Man failed to bring Adora to the light and she fully ascended to Leader Status after Killing Hordak.

While Parallel timelines MAY seem complicated at first, it's an easy (and somewhat lazy) way to fix al the discrepancies in continuity. We state that there are certain "fixed points" in the timeline that CANNOT be changed. Like say: One of Randor's Children MUST BE Taken by the Horde or Keldor MUST Be Mortally wounded by Randor at the end of the Great Unrest. Other events CAN Be Changed. Like say: Geldor Lives after his defeat by a Tree, or Nepthu dies and never joins the Snakemen. the whole convoluted mess is simply Spector writing journals based on different timelines. In other words the Bios are Journal Entries made by Spector on Each character.

Then again, we needed a better team that would have streamlined the story since the beginning...

Again, I'm going to touch the "cloned sword"... MOTUC canon states:
He-ro brought the sword, died and gave it to Grayskull. Grayskull split the sword in two as he died.
The swords were kept separate for nearly 5000 years and were rejoined to be cloned. The "clone" got a stone of protection for some reason and the "original" was split in two. Somehow Keldor/Skeletor got the whole sword and then only half. Adam ended up with half of the sword and ran around with the Techno Sword that could also access the power of Grayskull. Eventually Adam got the whole sword by fusing both halves. Then Adam gave the clone to his sister. His sword transformed to the NA Version and the Laser Power version. He gives the sword to Dare and it becomes the vintage version.

Here's how you could have simplified the whole thing:
He-ro brought the sword, died and gave it to Grayskull. Grayskull split the sword in two as he died.
The swords were kept separate for nearly 5000 years. Keldor/Skeletor ended up with one Half of the Sword and Adam ended up with the Other half. The Techno Sword that Adam uses is a "Half sword Emulator" (Made by Duncan AND The Sorceressby using King Grayskull's Ax and Shield) to access the power of Grayskull. Unable to fully join both halves, due to Skeletor's half being corrupted by evil; The Sorceress uses He-Ro's Gem of Protection to Purify the blade. Using He-ro's Armor and Staff, The Sorceress asks Duncan to make a second Techno Sword. This sword becomes Adora's sword. Then we have the NA and Laser Power evolution. After giving the Power Sword to Dare, Adam forges his own sword based on Duncan's Techno Sword.

While there are more words on my explanation, I simplified the whole story of the swords AND in a way I added an explanation on WHY Adam seems to be more aligned with Grayskull, while Adora seems more aligned with He-Ro.

Hell, it's even easier to fix the conflicting origins of He-Man WITHOUT Parallel timelines. The Real Origin is the whole Adam, blah, blah, blah, By the Power of Grayskull, I have the Power!!! thing. In order to "disguise" the whole Adam being He-Man thing, the "winds of myth and legend" could speak of the Pre-Filmation Mini comics He-Man as being the Real He-Man.

But this is an even crazier "new" concept: Not all characters need to be "tied by canon".
Do we REALLY NEED a reason to justify Despara in MOTUC? HELL NO! She's simply a cool alternate take on Force Captain Adora! Even the Horrible Iron-He-Man could be added to MOTUC WITHOUT Needing some ridiculous explanation on how his armor is the Anti-Horde Armor or something.

May 5, 2014

MOTUC, Negativity and Ruben not being on the MOTUC Team

It has been a busy week in the MOTUC Fandom: Extendar, Flogg and Intergalactic Skeletor FINAL Figures were revealed. Etherian Invasion Hordak was revealed as the SDCC Exclusive. Ruben Martinez was replaced by Brandon Sopinsky. (the guy who was in charge of the Mattel Voltron Toys)

There have been a few controversies regarding some of these news. (Mostly on he reveals.) These controversies have brought back some of the grudges among the fandom.

Now before I delve deep into the issue, I must make a redundant warning. The following is MY OPINION and its not to be considered as a fact, except the parts that I specifically state that X is a fact. Like for example: Mattel made a less than stellar "Classicizing" of Extendar and Skeletor. That is a fact. Some may LIKE The end Result, Some may HATE the end Result, but the fact is still that going from Prototype to Final Figure, Mattel somewhere along the way made some choices that resulted in a less than stellar conversion.

Now with that said, I will also employ hyperbole for the sake of amusement. Rants and tirades NEED some flair. Saying that "Ruben's so incompetent that he makes Rocksteady and Bebop seem efficient." is an exaggeration played for laughs and to encompass the ludicrousness of Internet Ramblings and NEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRDDDDD RRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGEEEEEEEE!!!!

Yes, I'm "Picking on Ruben" because he's been an easy target, since he's done a LOT of the most baffling Design choices in MOTUC History... (But Higuchi is no saint either... He gave us TV Tray Sorceress wings)
I've complained a bit about Ruben and even called him "an incompetent A-Hole".  The incompetence bit stems from his inability to "SEE WHAT'S WRONG WITH VARIOUS FIGURES" Bloated Armor that is not tight fitting. Seriously, I can stick a finger inside the armor WHILE THE FIGURE IS WEARING IT WITH EASE!! (Something IMPOSSIBLE TO DO on a Higuchi-made figure) Or how the "Female Crotch NEEDS to have those Jumbo codpieces since it's IMPOSSIBLE to do Female Buck 2.0 Crotches that have "Loincloths" that look like Bikini Bottoms and not MEGA CODPIECES...

Posting this for NO REASON at ALL!
I've called him A-Hole for his attitude regarding the issues. Am I glad he is gone? Yes and No...
The yes part is obvious... I am not a fan of many of his choices and his design ideas HAVE Harmed Figures (Stinkor, Frosta, Sea Hawk, Glimmer and others come to mind) Also Damn the Slightly Different Green Color for Clawful's mace.

The No part is where it gets mildly confusing, but I'll make it short and sweet... Better the Devil You know and all that. The 'Guru has stated that recent figures like Extendar and NA Skeletor were worked by BOTH Brandon and Ruben. The latter finished his run with Intergalactic (New Adventures) Skeletor. I WANT TO BELIEVE that Brandon is going to be Awesome and that the figures will be great, BUT... I saw some Voltron Reviews AND I saw Extendar... A Cool Looking Figure RUINED by Mattel's incompetence (Not sure WHO to blame here: Ruben or Brandon)
From Left to Right: Vintage Toy, FourHorsemen Prototype (stretched and normal modes),Packed Final Figure. 
Look at the Picture... Notice the difference on the Forearms and the Belt. Very Noticeable from Prototype to Final Figure. People HAVE COMPLAINED about this and rightfully so, but there's a vocal segment that is calling the complaints "Negativity", "Whining" and "Nitpicking".
I don't see it as "Negativity". I see it as customers being not pleased with a product that we "bought blindly" (due to the Sub). This is NOT an Isolated incident, there HAVE BEEN Issues throughout the line... Goddess having breakage issues, the Reversed Shoulders on the Original He-Man, Roboto, King Hsss.) Roboto and Cychop's Torso cracking. Snout Spout's trunk breaking. The Swift Wind Wing Hole Issue and the reversed legs issue, The figures suffering from Black Palstic Syndrome. All of these have been Quality issues (though the Blastic was a cost cutting measure that caused a decrease on quality) The Sorceress' Wings, now THAT is a Design Blunder. The Elongated Forearm on Extendar is another design Blunder. The Worst Blunder is the Belt, because instead of Enlarging the Red Area of the Belt (and enlarging the Studs on the Belt and keeping the upper gold band in similar proportions to the prototype and vintage figure, we now have an Extendar who is wearing a Golden Belt AND a Red Fanny pack... (Asking for a Fanny Pack for He-Man is Anime Hyper Detail)

Things like these and the Oversized "Armor" on NA Skeletor, where the "Armor" is supposed to be his Flesh that make AMAZING Figures into OK or "meh" figures.

"Nitpicking" would be complaining about Prince Adam's vest not being the appropriate shade of Puce. Complaining about the lack of paint on weapons can be considered "nitpicking" by some. Others see it as one of the failures in "cost cutting". Saying that the Belt on Extendar is all wrong is not really "nitpicking".

Here's the thing: I Believe that people do not enjoy having to complain about design and quality issues, BUT it HAS TO BE DONE LOUDLY AND NUMEROUSLY in order for Mattel to consider fixing things...

Extendar is proof that their "Eagle Eyed" design team can't do a proper job. WHO IN THE HELL OK'D That Figure!? All 3 of Extendar's pics I found after a 30 second google search. Didn't they use any reference material before adapting "The Statues that the 4horsemen make into toys"? I find it SHAMEFUL that the BIGGEST TOY COMPANY IN THE WORLD does such a MEDIOCRE JOB on some figures, while others are masterpieces!

I've already ranted about Not-Quite Filmation Hordak, complained about Skeletor's Flesh jacket and how horrible Extendar is, but I've not touched Flogg. Aside the Trap Jaw legs and Hordak Feet, he seems perfect... but I'm losing myself in my own rant. Mattel has made "the rules" when they "fixed" some things after overwhelming complaints: Keldor Swords, Snake Man-at-Arms come to mind. At the same time we've had Battleground Evil Lyn, whose backlash stemmed from being nothing more than an Evil Lyn repaint. Then Mattel did not learn from that and gave us a Repainted Hordak in Filmation colors. So it's like a crapshoot with Mattel. The "Negativity" in a way, benefits us all. Remember "Blastic"?

Yeah, some take it a bit too far, but again, we're on the internet... The Land of Hyperbolic comments and overreactions is where we communicate. While there IS BAD, there is also GOOD on MOTUC.
I often mention Marlena, Adora, Weaver, Octavia, The upcoming Scorpia, Madame Razz, Sea Hawk, the REAL King Randor, King Grayskull and all those figures that NEVER had a toy but now do. Then there is the whole recreating the Vintage Lines* in the 21st Century and under a cohesive style!

So, yeah! I'll complain about Blade's swords, Not-quite-Filmation Hordak, and Extendar's wonky proportions; it's not because I Hate Mattel, but out of LOVE of Masters. I'll praise them when they do good, but I'll complain when they goof up.

I'd rather be complaining about the ridiculous real names or nitpicking canon elements. Here's hoping that Brandon steps up to the plate and kicks enough butt to make the remaining MOTUC of 2014 and 2015 kick ass!

* = Original MOTU, most of POP and (sadly) Key NA folks... (I wish we were getting MOST of NA, but that's life)

May 3, 2014

So, what about Spider-Douche 2?

Let's see... 12 years ago, I was younger and more naive. The idea that a Spider-Man movie was happening, brought me an enormous joy.
I remember that Friday when I went to see Sam Raimi's Spider-Man as if it was yesterday. I was wearing my Spider-Man costume underneath my Civilian clothing, just like Parker. I cried when Uncle Ben died a lot harder than Tobey Maguire did.

12 Years later, I went through 2 Sam Raimi Spider-Man movies that were good, then I went through Spider-Man 3.Then I went through the Amazing Spider-Douche Reboot by Marc Webb. Now as an act of masochism, I went to see Amazing Spider-Douche 2.

Do I regret it? Let me sort out my thoughts. There might be some spoilers.

Andrew Garfield NOW feels more like Peter Parker and not the arrogant douche from the previous movie... Except the whole Spider-Stalker thing. His Spider-man is A LOT better than Tobey Maguire's. That's a good thing, because one of my biggest gripes with the other movie has been fixed here.

Max Dillon... Hoo boy! They went to the ultra pathetic and unhinged... Also a bit obsessed with Spidey, which puts him on creepy territory. This is before Electro. Jamie Foxx did a great job, even if I didn't like the direction they took Electro... or should I call him Dubsteptro?

The Osborns... BLEGH! I hate how they made Norman into some sort of Green Goblin and then KILLED HIM WITHOUT Him being the GREEN GOBLIN! (as in the Nemesis of Spider-Man) That's a load of crap! Harry seems more ruthless... almost like Norman... I don't like this. they seem to have recycled Raimi's Orborn loses company and gets revenge angle. I can see some hurt/comfort slashfics with Harry and Electro coming. WHERE'S MY DAMNED GEORGE WASHINGTON BRIDGE!?

(Alistair) Smythe, Felicia (Hardy)... Clever cameos movie... On the other hand the whole Set-up to the Electro Fight and the fight felt very videogamey (as seen on the Trailer) So, to answer my question: I kinda have some regrets seeing it. While the Parker improved. I wasn't too sold on Electro nor on Dane DeHaan's Harry. I had a bit of Déjà vu with him. It almost felt like I had seen him play this character before, but on a much crappier movie. On the other hand, my expectations for this movie were pretty low and it went slightly above my expectations. So, it's still bad, but not Street Fighter: the Legend of Chun Li or Dragon Ball: Evolution Bad. This is Tobey-Man 3 bad.

I hate this Oscorp-centric movieverse and the excessive importance put on Richard Parker...
Wait, no Life of Pi joke? Nope!  Seriously, Adrian Toomes does not develop his Flight Suit. Otto Octavius does not develop his Hazardous Material Arms... They are all Oscorp made... That's a load of crap! It makes a petty hireling out of Otto Octavius!! That is wrong!

I can't believe I'm saying this, but I AM a bit curious about 3... Sinister Six and all that. Don't do as I did, just wait until it's on DVD and watch it for free on Wal Mart.

June 27: the day the Topangaborn is unleashed upon us!

Girl Meets World's first Episode will air then.

I'm a bit cautious since the Trailer seems a bit less Boy Meets World, but more of a Generic Disney Channel Show kind of thing. 50+ days to go... Feeny! Feeny... Fee-hee-hee-heeney!

Here's the thing, now that I'm catching up to all the anticipation, the fear that it will NOT meet my expectations is setting in. I'm nervous!!

May 1, 2014

It Came from the Toy Chest: Satan is Beastman's bitch!

Look at Goatman and tell me that he does not look like The Devil or some character from an Old School Metal album art. As you may have guessed I'm reviewing Goatman.

OK, so the dude comes from a Golden Book... As far as I know the book that Goatman appears was not made into a Golden Books video. He was a slave to Beastman's power and got his butt kicked...
That is all we got to know about Goatman. Classics just makes him Beastman's Bitch all the way to the Neitlichverse's He-Ro: Son of He-Man... because Time Travel. also he's got a real name now... Klacky!

So, let's move on to Klacky: the review...

He has the standard normal body without any extra points of articulation like Whiplash, Mantenna, Draego-Man, etc. so there are no surprises on him. His armor is not a full body armor, so there is less restriction on the Ab Crunch for him. His ankles are loose as Hell due to Mattel using the older boots with the visible pins.
Loo-Kee and Kowl: Noooooooooo!

Paint and Sculpt:
This guy is mostly on the main buck... (Then again so are most figures) The NEW Pieces are cool.
I LOVE the Forearms and cements the idea that we totally needed a lot of the new post-2012 parts to spice up some of the 30th Figures (Spector and Loser-Lot, I'm talking about thee) Paintwise he's 98% flawless. A little slop on my left foot ruins his flawlessness!

Loo-Kee: Waaaaait! Waaaaaaait! Waaaaait! You Beastman lover!
We Challenge you to a Rock-Off! Give us one chance to rock your socks off!
Klacky has one accessory. His badass Warhammer kicks ass! OK so it reminds me a bit of Shao Kahn's Warhammer or Kombat Hammer. Point is the Hammer is a sea of awesomeness.
The other Accessory is not for Klacky, but for Stratos. This is the SECOND Staff of Avion that Stratos receives. First one was released with Icer (who I don't own) and was based on the Filmation version. Stratos cannot hold that staff due to his open hands. The Horseman who sculpted the staff was unable to add a tab for Stratos to hold it due to a family emergency (IIRC his father died and he had to take some time off to deal with that matter) and Mattel design in their infinite incompetence were unable to add one. They can switch forearms, add MAA mustaches to Dekker's young head, make leotards look like jumbo codpieces, but add a little tab for Stratos to hold that staff is impossible.
So, Stratos got a NEW Staff of Avion, this time based on the Mini Comics version. With a tab to slip it on Stratos' hand.

GoatMan is a cool Addition to Skeletor's Ranks. He gets a 4.17 The staff of Avion is a cool accessory to have. The Warhammer is a better accessory. For an obscure character, he is pretty cool! If all else fails, I can always do Beelzeboss references with him!

It Came from the Toy Chest: YOU CAN'T SEE ME! (no, not lame-ass Cena)

Card should have said: Kowl and Loo-Kee.
I'm talking about Loo-Kee. That Judgmental Squirrel who hides, sees everything, and tries to teach you stuff to be a better person. Or a weird pervert if we believe some horrible fan-fics.
Since Yesterday, I've had the Overpriced Loo-Kee and Kowl pack. Dammit! Had I known I would not have repainted the WP#4 Kowl into Filmation colors... Oh well. I already discussed Kowl, so we know what we get here.

and then, there's Kowl...
what can I say about him... He's in vintage Toy Colors... Something that to this day confuses me since PRETTY MUCH EVERYTHING POP in MOTUC has been FILMATIONIZED... Expecting Kowl in Filmation Colors is not a far-fetched thing... Kowl has 3 POA limited by his sculpt. Arms cannot do 360 Degree movement due to the body and ears. Head can barely move left or right due to the ears. Mattel blames Kowl for the lack of paint applications on everything else. Then again, they bumped up the price on the packs while blaming Kowl for it as well... I'd love to get an extra 2 kowls... One to keep in toy colors and the third one to make Red-Eye (Kowl's Evil Cousin) BTW, my WP had one huge QC issue. Kowl's head fell off his body once I took him out of the package... I popped it in for that pic, then repainted him into a more Filmation-like palette. Let's face it: Kowl is the reason to get this Weapons Pack...
I was unable to bite the bullet to get the other 2 WP#4, mostly because of the excess of dud weapons.
This Kowl is Pretty much the same as the previous Kowl, but in Filmation Colors. Ah! I almost forgot. Kowl comes with The Stand from Gorpo.

Rabid Zombie Loo-Kee has taken his first victim!
Then there's the Star of the Show: Loo-Kee...

So, let's get to the Ratings part of the Review:

While I did talk in full about Kowl, Loo-Kee has head, arms and tail as Articulation points. Yes, it's 1 PoA more than Kowl, but he could have used a bit more articulation like wrist swivel, ball shoulders.
Like Loo-Kee I kinda wish Kowl had a bit more Articulation. In his case I'd like Ball shoulders.
2.0 for Kowl 2.5 for Loo-Kee
Paint and Sculpt:
The Sculpt is OK-ish on Loo-Kee, my minor complaint would be that the head is a bit too large. On Kowl, well, it's the same sculpt as the previous Kowl. Niw the Paintjob is where these figures fall a bit flat.  On both figures, it's  very sloppy.
3.0 for both.

Kowl is using Gorpo's Stand and Loo-Kee is using Kowl's.
a Stand: Specifically speaking, Gorpo's Stand. That's it... there should have been two of them! (second one is for Yellow-Kowl) Maybe some accessories with Imp's face tampographed on them.


Loo-Kee, a Bat Capsule Toy, a Blindbag Pony and Kowl.
Here Kowl gets a 2.0 while Loo-Kee gets a 2.17 as the overall score... I Really feel that the price of this pack is too damn high. $2 Dollars... That was the difference in cost between Weapons Pack #3 and Weapons pack #4. Now Mattel is trying to tell us that each mini figure costs $10 to make. It just doesn't seem to add up. By looking at the set while it's still Mint on Card, you can feel ripped off! It's light as heck! The characters are slightly bigger than a capsule machine toy! Maybe if they had thrown in something more, then more people would have felt a bigger bang for their buck! The price feels a bit too much for near-statue slightly larger than normal Capsule toys.