Feb 8, 2010

Hey What The!? Lap dances for Haiti

Ah, the lap dance. It makes everything better... Even Haiti.
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20100208/ap_on_fe_st/us_odd_quake_relief_strip_club;_ylt=AnO6qp2oi6OL40AyjDuXUFPtiBIF;_ylu=X3oDMTJ2MG91bWE2BGFzc2V0A2FwLzIwMTAwMjA4L3VzX29kZF9xdWFrZV9yZWxpZWZfc3RyaXBfY2x1YgRjcG9zAzEEcG9zAzEEc2VjA3luX3RvcF9zdG9yeQRzbGsDb2hpb3N0cmlwY2x1
This Ohio strip club is raising money for Haiti by lap dancing...
Yes I know I've had my share of ranting towards Haiti's situation, but this is a lot better than being (insert a celebrity here)speaking on why we should help Haiti. (We don't even know if said celeb is helping Haiti at all.)

Now things that could be better if they had a lap dance in it's package:

-Blood Drives: Nothing gets the blood pumping like a good lap dance.
-Waiting in the doctor's office:It will kill time a lot faster than reading about yacths, golfing, and Swordfishing. Also you might get one sick lap dance.
-Avatar: Sure, the BLUE CGI 10 ft. tall kitties look good on the screen, but a Lap dance would make Pandora even better. (I'll take one from Sigourney Weaver, or the Latina chick from Resident Evil over the 10 ft. blue CGI cats... I love humans, not Blue CGI cats.)
-Jonas Bothers' concerts: It's something to distract your mind from them.
-Crappy videogames: This falls in the same vein as the JB concert. Turning crap into gold.
-Transformers movies: It'll take away the franchise rape, as long as Megan Fox is not the one giving it... Saw the trailers for Jennifer's Body... (Pretty sure that it IS a Megan Fox Biopic...)

Lap dance away Ohio strip club... It would be cool if Haiti COULD literally get a lap dance...

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