Top 20 Celebs I'd like to have Ultimates! of

 Things are a bit slow since there's very little game news, or toy news other than Amazon's Technodrome for the vintage TMNT has been delayed. So, instead of making another TMNT list, I'm branching out to celebs... 

20: Michael Jordan:

Basketball's GOAT himself. I don't NEED him on his 23 Bulls regalia, but I also wouldn't say no to it. Yes, I'm thinking of basically Michael Jordan in a business suit. 

Heads:

Neutral

Smiling

Tongue

Specialized hands:

Six rings

Ball holding hand

Accessories:

B-Ball 

Trophies

B-ball hoop

19: Terry Crews:

I blame White Chick's and Brooklyn nine nine for this desire. But essentially Terry Crews in a suit 3 sizes too small that does little to hide his puffiness.

Heads:

Neutral

Happy

Angry

Accessories:

MP3 player (you know what song is playing)

Body products for men. (Another reference)

18: Jackie Chan:

Basically the Jackie Chan from the Live Action segments of Jackie Chan Adventures. A City Hinter Chun Li Jackie would be welcome, but unlikely to happen.

Heads:

Neutral

Confused/drunk

Angry

Specialized hands:

Drunken boxing hands

Victory sign hands.

Accessories:

Shendu statue

Alcoholic drink

Alt. Clog feet

17: Steven Seagal:

Everyone would be asking for the leaner Seagal from the 80s. I want Fat Ranma Seagal.

Heads:

Beard

No beard

Specialized hands:

Guitar playing hands

Accessories:

Handgun

Katana

Carrot

Electric guitar

Necklace with deputy badge

16: Eddie Murphy:

Basically Eddie Murphy in a T-shirt and jeans with a soft goods varsity jacket as a reference to Axel Foley.

Heads:

Neutral

Laughing

Annoyed

Accessories:

Handgun

Stand up Mic

Eddy Murphy Record

Mushu or Donkey plushie

Stack of The Adventures of Pluto Nash DVDs.

Glass of water 

15: Nicolas Cage:

Honestly, I have no idea what he should be wearing. I just want a freaking Batshit insane Nicolas Cage figure.

Heads:

Neutral short hair

Neutral long hair

Batshit insane short hair

Batshit insane long hair

 Atshit insane short hair with a skull painted on his face

Accessories:

US constitution

Handgun

Dark shades

Burnt doll

Sealed Superman comic

Sledgehammer

14: Zack Snyder:

I know, I know, Nefty hates Zack Snyder, but a Snyder figure makes sense somehow. Black and white variant could be a Snydercon Exclusive.

Heads:

Smiling

Smug

Accessories:

Smartphone

Movie camera

The infamous stolen reels from the snydercut

His participation Oscar

his 4 Razzies

Dumbells

13: Miley Cyrus:

This is Adult Miley, not Mouse Era Miley, which I'd like, but Super7 screwed the pooch with Disney. Essentially miley in a pantsuit.

Heads:

Neutral

Smiley tongue head

Accessories:

Sledgehammer

Riding crop

Handgun 

Smartphon

Guitar with a mostly peeled off Hannah Montana logo. 

Or something even more scratched off than this.

12: Gabriel Iglesias:

Picture hin with a Hawaiian shirt, Jean shorts.

Heads:

Clean shaven "vintage fluffy"

Goatee with cap

Accessories:

Stand up Mic 

His chihuahuas

Racist basket

11: Jack Black:

Basically Jack Black wearing whatever.

Heads:

Clean shaven

Crazy Alan Moore Version of Black

Specialized hands:

Guitar playing hands one with Pick of Destiny

Accessories:

Pith Helmet (reference both to jumanji and Pitfall)

Not an Atari 2600

Electric guitar (reference to Tenacious D and Brutal Legend)

10: David Hasselhoff:

Basically David Hasselhoff being David Hasselhoff.

Heads:

80s Hasselhoff

Current era Hasselhoff

90s Eyepatch Hasselhoff

Accessories:

David Hasselhoff Vinyl record

Lifeguard floating can

SpongeBob plushie

Handgun

Picture of William Daniels with David Hasselhoff 

It was either this or a $500+ Super7 Trans Am...

9: Sophie Turner:

No need to explain much... just Sophie Turner wearing normal clothes and a few references to past movies/shows.

Heads:

Redhead

Blonde

Accessories:

Wolf plushie

Flaming Phoenix plushie

Handgun

8: Ernie Reyes Jr.:

No, this is not a backdoor Keno Ultimates. This is an Adult Ernie Reyes Jr. Figure wearing normal clothes.

Heads:

Current era bald head

MMA era with short hair

Specialized hands: 

MMA gloved hands open hands and fists

Accessories:

Bo staff

Katana

Pizza warmer box

Removable Patusan Headband

Ooze canister

7: Ming-Na Wen:

Ming Na Wen sporting normal clothes. No preference here.

Heads:

Neutral

Smiling

Angry with Chun Li hairdo:

Accessories:

Temuera Morrison's Auto Biography. (Get it? Book of Boba Fett reference)

Twelfth Night script. (It's a play about a woman pretending to be a man.)

Calendar with May 30th 2023 circled. The day she got her star, which was also, Tuesday. (SF reference)

Handgun (reference to Agents of SHIELD)

6: Tony Hawk:

It's Tony Hawk. What else can I say?

Heads:

With Skateboarding helmet

Without skateboarding Helmet

Specialized hands:

Skateboard holding hands

Accessories:

Skateboard

It's Tony Hawk, what else can I say?

5: Isabela Merced:

Isabela Merced wearing an outfit inspired by her Madame Web clothes, but in Dora colors.

Heads:

Neutral

Determined

Dora hairdo

Accessories:

Hawkgirl Mace

Capuchin monkey 

SILVER Welther PPK gun (Megatron reference)

4: Sabrina Carpenter:

The Feenyverse had Nothing to do with me wanting her in action fogure form.

This is what made me want her in action figure form. That's the look I want for her, especially since I have an Action Figure scaled British Broadcasting Corporation. 

3:Fred Savage:

Mostly because of The Princess Bride, The Wizard, and Deadpool...

OK purely because of Deadpool.

He could get a Not a NES with Not NES Cartridges, a copy of The Princess Bride, the book, not the movie. Maybe a pic of him with Daniel Stern (double reference)

2: Ben Savage:

I mentioned Fred Savage and you'd think I'd skip my favorite Savage that isn't Randy or Adam?

Honestly I'd put him in a business suit for Political campaigning with banners and signs for; Savage 2024, a framed Pic of William Daniels.

Before I show my Number 1, here are some

Honorable mentions:

Will Friedle:

Normal Will Friedle wearing an outfit reminiscent of Terry McGinnis

Heads:

Normal Will

Silly Will

Plays with Squirrels

Accessories:

Naked Mole Rat

Sword of Omens in Dagger mode

A Beyond Batarang

Staff

Soft goods tunic

Manifesto.

Mark Paul Gosselaar:

Normal Mr. Gosselaar

Heads:

Normal MPG

Bleached Blond MPG

Accessories:

Brick Cellphone

Cardboard cutout of Tiffani-Thiesen (made of plastic)  

Raúl Juliá:

Essentially Raúl Juliá wearong normal clothes that exude dapper vibes.

Heads:

Neutral expression

Hamming it up expression

Dracula head

Accessories:

Rapier

Dictator hat

Soft goods fancy robe

Soft goods cape

Broken lance

Lance Bass:

What? I only want Lance Bass because of the Sephiroth references I could make... yes, George Newbern is the better known Sephiroth, but Lance was the first English voice of Sephiroth. Final Fantasy beats dick jokes, or Nick Arcade contestants.

Essentially it would be Lance Bass, not much to add.

Heads :

Clean shaven

Bearded

Clean shaven with hair dyed silver

Accessories:

Magenta Soft goods pajamas

Black trenchcoat soft goods

Ridiculously long Katana

Jaleel White:

Picture Jaleel White wearing normal clothes shirt blazer blue jeans and red Chuck Taylor's.

Heads:

Normal Jaleel

Surprised Jaleel

Accessories:

Weed baggies

Bong

Chili dog

Block of cheese

Disembodied Urkelbot head

Urkel glasses

Haley Joel Osment:

Here at the House of Rants we love Haley Joel Osment...'s sister Emily. But since I added Miley, adding Lilly would be cheating. So, I chose the Necrogazing fucker whose ass I want to penetrate with a keyboard until his eyes pop out for seeing Mom...

Celestiadammit! Who let Nick Cade write this segment!? Nick, you asshole! Yes, I hate Haley Joel Osment's necrosight, but I wouldn't be shoving Keyblades up Sora's ass. That's how we end up with Roxas, Vanitas, Ventus, and Xion... Donald on the other hand...

Thanks to Mr. Cade's interference I'll end the honorable mentions here. So you missed out on:

Jenna Ortega, Amber Turd, Whoopi Goldberg, Uma Thurman, Iman Vellani, Amy Adams, Jim Parsons, Hugh Laurie, Tom Hanks, LeBron James (maid outfit), Eminem, Anthony Mackie, Don Cheadle, Maury Povich, Jerry Springer, Oprah (no 9001 penises), Fresh Douche and the bald she-devil.

Now for the Number one most wanted celebrity figure...

Are you ready?

1: William Daniels:

You had to know he was going to be Numero 1 when Raúl Juliá didn't even make the list. I mean, the Hoff, Ben Savage, Sabrina Carpenter, I even added Plays with Squirrels in the honorable mentions. It all lead to Feeny.