Jul 20, 2014

The moment you realize there is someone worse than Uwe Boll and Tommy Wiseau.

I am referring to Josh Trank... The "Genius" behind the new Fantastic Four Reboot... You know the one with the black guy being able to light himself on fire and making all the Klan Members squeal with joy. The one that is going to be gritty and realistic... With a man that can stretch, a woman that turns invisible, a man made out of orange rocks and a guy who can light himself on fire. Well, here's a funny quote from said guy who lights himself on fire:
Josh’s vision is very clear and he knows exactly what he wants, and he gives us room to adapt and to play. That’s what I kind of think sets us apart, is that this is going to be grounded and unconventional.It’s not your typical superhero film, you know, we aren’t looking at this as like, being superheroes. We’re more or less a bunch of kids that had an accident and we have disabilities now that we have to cope with, and try to find a life afterwards – try to be as normal as we can.

Basically, he's Making Chronicle 2 but now with "Marvel Characters"...
I know, some people liked Chronicle... So what? Some People liked Bloodrayne and The Room.

They are going to disregard the comic... That's the big red flag that pops up first...
Now, I understand that the Original Comic was about a scientist taking his girlfriend, her younger brother and his best friend on a space trip to beat the Commies in the Space Race. That element can be tweaked to 21st Century sensibilities.

Not having the Unstable Molecule Suits defeats the whole purpose of the Fantastic Four. That's what Makes the Team look like A Team. The same way Doctors, Firemen, Policemen, Judges, etc. have their uniforms. Their look lacking the Fancy Capes, Helmets, masks, etc. that other Superheroes have is what separates them from the other Superheroes. Their clothes are more utilitarian compared to other Superheroes. Their mostly neutral looking suits serve them well for their "Explorer vibe" Since they are more often exploring than doing Superheroics. The Thing being the one closest to a "Traditional" Superhero. By some of his deeds when going solo and by wearing the Strongman Briefs. (that's why Superheroes wear briefs over their tights as a tribute to Strongmen)

Now, yes, the Fantastic Four did not wear their suits during the start of their career; but they are part of their Iconic Look... Having a whole movie WITHOUT the suits would be almost as bad as Smallville's Torture with the suit, but much shorter.

I know I'm dancing around the main issue from MBJ's comments.

The whole "Disabilities" thing... I find it a bit disturbing that he is comparing having Super Powers to a disability. Especially when he is playing the role of the single member of the Fantastic Four who TRULY ENJOYS having his powers. The only angsty Member of the Fantastic Four is supposed to be The Thing. The whole "oh noez we has supapowers! we must act normal!" is not Fantastic Four. Seriously I'm more Excited for the T.A.I.N.T. with "Generic Store Brand Michael Bay Knock-off #2" and Produced by the Real Michael Bay than I am for this... Hell, I'd support a Sequel to The Room before rooting for this.

8000 more rants to go...

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