May 29, 2015

It Came from the Toy chest: Sopinsky's Explosive Boner

Not talking about THAT kind of Boner... I mean Boner as Mistake... Just like the infamous Batman Comic...

Blast Attak, the most Politically Incorrect MOTU Figure has reached Classics... So, if you are sensitive about Reusable Suicide Bomber Robots, stop reading this rant and head here. If you are bad dude enough to save the president, then you can handle a Blast Attak review.

So, Blast Attak... He's a Reusable Suicide Bomber Robot.
I know that robots cannot be suicide bombers because they are not alive per se, but it sounds better than Sentient Time Bomb. So, as you can see in a post 9/11/2001 a Sentient Time Bomb or a Reusable Suicide Bomber Robot can be a bit touchy... He can be as sensitive as a Jeff Dunham act...

Since he is a Snakeman, I can theoretically use him as a Robotic Version of Achmed the dead Terrorist... You just pictured Blast Attak saying SILENCE! I KEEL YOU! in Achmed's voice... If not, then

Now... Let us begin, shall we?

Why did I titled the rant Sopinsky's Explosive Boner?
Sopinsky is the Design team dude who replaced Ruben "Mediocre" Martinez in MOTUC.
Explosive because it's Blast Attak.
Boner? Where do we start?
He doesn't do a Blast Attack for starters... Battle Armor has Battle Damage simulation, Thunder Punch has a Thunderpunch Simulation, Stinkor stinks, Scareglow glows. Man-e-Faces has many faces, Extendar has an Extension simulation, Rio Blast blasts, Stonedar and Rokkon Rock on! Modulok is Modular...
Many moons ago I made a rant, from which this pic on the left appeared before. As you can see on the pic I went with far more parts reuse than the actual figure got, but the idea was to reuse the King HSSSS abs with the Trap Jaw Upper Torso and shoulders with Horde Prime forearms and Hands to make an exploding Blast Attak. You popped the Original Torso out and placed the Explosion torso.(My drawing is not exactly to scale. The point of this alternate torso was to clip on the Shoulders, head and hands on different places so it looked like he was in mid explosion.) Now even if Mattel wouldn't do the extra Boom Boom Torso, the ability to have Blast Attak blasting off on the battlefield is a cool one. Sadly, Mattel did not do that... for some reason. (Logistics... That Style's retired... Scott's pick.)

The Horsemen picked the Horde Trooper Torso to give him some robotic goodness, but WE CANNOT SEE THAT TORSO because Design chose to GLUE HIS ARMOR TO HIS TORSO...
He HAS the Trap Jaw Shoulders, but this time Design engineered the discs for them to NOT DETACH... So, no detachable arms, or waist for a guy that's supposed to split in half... He can only pop off his head and his fists...

So, one tiny sliver of a blast induced attack survived...

Now let's take a look at the figure itself.
Standard MOTUC Articulation. Surprisingly he has new legs WITH BOOT CUT and a very limited ab crunch.

Paint and Sculpt:
Aside the head and glued on armor he is parts reuse from the waist up.
From the waist down, he's all new and perfect for Optikk... which came out about 4 years ago...
Paintwise, mine's a bit sloppy. Glue stains on his back, gold smudge on his head. The red port on his back was unpainted on mine. (I modded the port following a guide on FB and his whip can now plug in like the vintage detonator cable.)
The vintage Junkyard Axe and the Detonator wire converted into a whip. Not having the whip to be plugged into the back as a nod to the vintage Detonator was another boner. He feels like he is lacking something... 3.0


Blast Attak gets a 3.67 as his final score. He LOOKS good, it's just that he needed to be 20% cooler.
He feels like he is lacking something... I mean Extendar is more of a Blast Attak than Blast Attak himself... Isn't that sad?

 If a blasting apart Blast Attak couldn't be done, then we could have used a THIRD Accessory: A Blast effect that could be put on his armor to simulate the Explosive action. (similar to Thunder Punch He-Man) But that's an Evil Warrior/Snakeman left... Only Ssssqueeze, Saurod and Twistoid to complete those two factions.

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