Mar 23, 2023

Dick van Dyke suffers minor driving accident

 Holy asscrackers! Why is a 97 year old man still driving around!? If you're going to call me ageist for saying that a 97 year old man shouldn't be driving, you better be ready to cancel Dick van Dyke because his name is offensive...
Or shall we use the more politically correct Penis Van Lesbian? Now that I got the Dick van Dyke name jokes, let's follow with the rant.

So, DvD... wait, can't even abbreviate his name...van Dyke crashed into a gate due to heavy rains and possible hydroplanmning. He suffered minor injuries. You know, that's part of the reason I avoid driving in highways, especially in rainy weather. Had a hydroplaning incident with less than optimal tires. Didn't crash, but I was lucky. Had I stopped a few seconds later, I might not have lived to tell this story or keep posting. I was 39 at the time and I barely made it unscathed out of a hydroplaning accident. But van Dyke is a lot more luckier than I was, even if he got more hurt than I did...
At his age, my reflexes, would be completely messed up... it's at almost 41 and my reflexes suck ass... ask the countless dodgeballs with my face imprimted on them. Reflexes peak at the tender age of 24... Van Dyke is 73 years past his reflexes' prime... food for thought...

To end on a weird note: Dick Van Dyke statred in Chitty Chitty Bang Bang a movie written by the author of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory based on a book by the Author behind the James Bond series.

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